Pickup

When you approach a new girl, what should you talk about? Deep topics… or light ones? The answer is: light conversation when you first talk to a girl, if you want success.

On my article “What an Average Girl's Dating History Looks Like” last year, reader 'Handome & Wealthy' commented:

Here's a quick Q on the part about not talking about yourself to a girl.

I do this a lot. My brand of game is the stong silent guy game. I've been told I'm "calm" "mysterious" "like a spy" and some girl even said I'm "distant" and "hard to get to know".

I'm still working on my calibration so I don't appear too detached.

But there's an issue I keep running into.

I meet girl. Hook. Then begin to deep dive without sharing much about myself. I'm careful not to go in too deep with the dives so the vibe is good. My conversations are interspered w/ a lot of flirting and mild cocky funny quips.

However after we part ways... the vibe changes. Changes bc the girl feels like she overshared and didnt get anything from me.

What goes here Chase? How do I stay detached without creating murky vibes after?

I referred him to my article on anchoring attraction, so that the emotions she feels in conversation with you don't evaporate once conversation ends.

But next I talked to him about something I see a lot of guys get wrong, especially guys who discover deep diving... which is to go straight into deep, contemplative conversation during that first initial interaction.

Early interactions should usually be fun, flirtatious, and light. You do not want them to be too heavy with meaty conversation and weighty emotions.

In today's article, I'll give you some tactics you can use to keep the initial interaction light and moving forward, without having to rely on deep dives (just yet).

It’s possible to pick up girls fast.. if you know what you’re doing. Pick the right targets, calibrate your approach, escalate expertly, and use your top seduction tools.

Note: This post is for advanced or higher intermediate guys looking for advice on pulling quickly but may contain good advice for beginners, especially concerning physical escalation, screening, and calibration.

There are three types of men: those who want status, those who want comfort, and those who want genes. Which type of woman you prefer depends on which type of man you are.

There are three (3) kinds of people in the world when it comes to mate selection:

1. Those who seek status: i.e., the flashiest, most popular mates

2. Those who seek comfort: i.e., the coziest, most companionable mates

3. Those who seek genes: i.e., the most genetically gifted, naturally elite mates

My experience in a decade-and-a-half instructing men in this space is that these preferences appear to be hardwired, whether by genetics or early life experiences. I've never known an individual to switch underlying mate selection paradigms.

The kinds of mates each type of individual is seeking and the most optimal ways to encounter them differs according to the mating paradigm. This introduces some subtle (and some not-so-subtle) differences in what styles of game each type prefers, and each type's opinions on which sorts of mates are the high watermark.

Clashes between the styles occur when a member of one or the other type insists his preferences are the best, and anyone who disagrees must be fooling himself.

Today though, we'll clear away the bullshit and look at things straight.

How much does it cost to live a life that consistently brings you top shelf girls? Not as much as you might expect.

We had a forum thread recently where a member was asking how much money you'd realistically need to sleep with a lot of top shelf, high quality girls.

I assume what he meant was rich girls, successful girls, good-looking girls with lots of options, etc.

He listed out a bunch of things he thought you'd need in order to consistently get girls like this, such as:

• Dining out costs
• Gym costs and supplements
• Transportation costs
• Downtown apartment costs

... and so on.

I went through and did the math on it for him and came back with a minimum Spartan total of $780/mo to pay for housing, food, transport, and other things to live in a big Western metropolis with no amenities to consistently lay top shelf women.

However, I suggested he probably try to aim for at least $1500/month in income so he wasn't having to go super Spartan.

One forum member came back to note that he agreed with me on everything but what I put for housing; $400/mo (my 'housing on the outskirts of the city' low-end estimate) would only get you the tiniest, seediest room in a big city, he said.

But that's what I'm talking about: I've lived in a $300/mo tiny room (so tiny I had to get rid of most of my belongings before I moved in... coming from a larger apartment I could more easily afford, back when I was gainfully employed) in a house in the bad part of town with a roommate who left little, tiny hairs all over the bathroom every day (I could never figure out where all the hairs were coming from, or why they were there, DAILY. The man had a major shedding problem).

I had to clean up that hairy bathroom every time I had a girl coming over because I didn't want her to puke going in there. The roommate would never clean it up. (the other roommate was cool, but he didn't use that bathroom)

BUT, I also kept that dirty roommate up very late at night listening to the moans and yells of the chicks I brought back home, so I guess it evened out. The walls there were very thin.

I've been the guy picking up top shelf girls to shag in a dingy, tiny room in the bad part of town.

I've had other friends who've been that guy too.

It never ceases to amaze me though at how many guys think you NEED a bunch of money to get a bunch of top quality girls.

Because you don't.

A quick pickup of a girl at a bar can seem like a gift from the sex gods. Finally! An easy lay! Yet if you are not that skilled with women yet, be wary of such “freebies.”

Hey guys. Welcome back.

In my last article, I discussed extended seductions—dragging out the seduction process for increased compliance and sexual tension. I don’t recommend this advanced technique for beginners. It is difficult to pull off, with room for unnecessary mistakes that could ruin everything.

So beginners and even intermediate players should NOT opt for such a strategy. Cases when extended seductions are needed are few, and same night/day lays, rather than dragging it out over multiple dates, will generally increase your odds of success.

However, I’m writing this post because this strategy has a few caveats.

Even though going for the same night/day pulls increases your odds, it is important to mention that this does not mean going for “quick pulls.” Instant pulls or same day/night lays are NOT synonymous with “quick pulls.”

What is a fantasy? Is it secretly also a desire? Seduce a woman’s mind with this curiosity-generating gambit. Then use it to frame yourself as a man she can go to bed with.

Picture this.

You’ve just met a gorgeous girl at the bar and she’s hanging onto every word you say. But what you’re saying is too platonic, and this interaction lacks the spark of anticipation between two potential lovers.

So you want to introduce sexual frames into the conversation and get this girl in a sexual mood.

After all, you don’t want her to friend zone you, pin you as a boyfriend candidate and slow things down, or get bored and go back to her friends. Now she is asking for your name, but you can’t help asking yourself this strategic question: “How can I sexualize this conversation and avoid resistance?”

Maybe your mind comes up blank because you don’t have an answer. Or perhaps you’ve got sex talk skills, and you just need a more reliable way to turn your conversations sexual.

Then it’s your lucky day because we’re about to look at a gambit that will let you set sexual frames with ease. After reading this, you’ll have an arsenal of potent and versatile topics to give you opportunities to influence women in even more ways, as you’ll soon discover.

Some girls you’ll meet have guy friends with them. How do you deal with these guy friends? Should you ignore them? Get to know them? Follow these 4 tips… then win them over.

As you approach girls, particularly in social venues, you are going to run into girls with guy friends.

Now, you might never approach girls with guys around them, but you should. A lot of girls go out with men they are 'just friends' with.

She might be the guy's wingwoman. She might be his ex-girlfriend (why some men go out with their ex-girlfriends I will never understand). She might be a girl he's crushing on but is deeply friend zoned with and has accepted that she's going to go off with other guys. He might be her dating app date she felt no spark with and now they're both just sort of hanging out to see if either of them can meet someone else.

If you're in a gay-friendly venue you will run into girls who are there with their gay male friend. I have picked up girls that looked like they were with a boyfriend at first, only to find out the guy was gay, and busy looking for his own guy to pick up at the same time the girl was.

Some guys will leave you alone as soon as you are talking to the girl.

But sometimes you will need to interact with them.

What's the right way to talk with a guy who is with a girl you want, who is not interrupting you or cockblocking you, but whose approval you are usually going to need?