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How to Be Edgy (and Turn Women On)

Chase Amante's picture

how to be edgyMost of the time, you walk about the world meeting ordinary people living ordinary lives who leave little of an impression on you. That's life.

But, every now and again, you see someone, or run into someone, who strikes you a certain way. You can't quite put your finger on what exactly that something is - the individual has a certain degree of intensity about him, you think; or a piercing gaze. He might not be charismatic; and he might not be sexy or sensual. But he's definitely got something.

This is a post about that "something;" about how to be edgy. Edge is a particularly difficult thing to learn, and teach, because it entails a specific rawness about oneself that most people simply lack. And that rawness is difficult to emulate when you don't have it... perhaps more difficult than being sexual, more than being charismatic, more difficult than almost anything else.

And while it is necessary for you to transcend into the higher levels of success with women, it isn't a magic bullet; you'll meet plenty of men with edges who still struggle with girls, too. It's a component, and a vital one, but it isn't all that good on its own.

Adrian commented the following recently over on the post about indirect game:

Chase,

Great to hear from you! Cultivating an "edge" is something you often talk about. That said, my understanding of what exactly constitute this "edge" is still rather spotty. To me, cultivating an "edge" is a movement along the "disarming and friendly" model towards the "bad-boy/don't-give-a-shit" model. Considering being warm and welcoming an integral factor in your process, how does cultivating an "edge" fit into it? Furthermore, during your journey in developing "edge" to your character, what are some specific areas/mindsets you worked on?

Many thanks,
A

All right Adrian, let's talk about it. We've talked about being a sexy man plenty on here, and the vibes and nuances that go along with that.

Now let's talk about being edgy itself, and how that's different from sexy... and just how combining edginess with sexiness turns you into a very compelling character, to everyone you encounter.

How to Have a Sexy Walk That Drives Women Nuts

Chase Amante's picture

sexy walkWhen I was 12 years old, I first started experimenting with my walk. I'd begun running social experiments a little earlier that year, and I figured I could tweak things about myself to give people the kind of impression I wanted to give them.

At first, I walked really fast. Everyone would comment on how fast I walked. I thought doing things quickly was good. But as I studied people more closely, I realized that slower was more powerful. So, 6 months after I started walking faster than anyone else, I slowed down... way down. Now everyone commented on how slow I walked... I walked slower than anyone else.

Over the years, I added pieces to my walk, refining and improving it: first to have a very powerful walk, then to have an intimidating walk.

It wasn't until my early 20s that I at last began developing a sexy walk, designed not to impress people, clear them out of my path on the street, or dissuade them from challenging me in bad parts of town, but, rather, to attract women.

On the article titled "Get a Girl Alone Today with These 7 Tips," Nick commented:

Hey Chase, great article by way.

I have bought your book and read up on your blog posts( having lots of success because of it) about how to have a powerful walk.
Although, I am not sure if I am being too try hard or being to subtle that it is unnoticeable. It would be great if sometime in the future you could put up a video demonstration or even list a few examples of actors in cinema who have a powerful walk.

Thank you

He's referring, of course, to the section of How to Make Girls Chase that discusses your walk. And Nick's right - something as nuanced as your walk needs video illustrations to show you how it's done.

And today's article is going to give you just that.

Facial Hair Styles to Make You Look Cool, Sharp and Sexy

Chase Amante's picture

Facial Hair StylesA long while back I posted about facial hair styles on here in "Facial Hair and Baddassedness," essentially summing up my findings that cool facial hair nets you better results with a better reception from the opposite sex; in effect, girls just like guys with facial hair better.

For me, the result was no comparison; the instant I had the right facial hair, women were telling me I was "hot" and "sexy," when these weren't words they used with me before (when I was clean-shaven it was more like "cute" and "handsome"). So I started recommending my clean-shaven friends to test drive some new facial hair styles, and they reported back similar results.

But just in case you'd like a little further support, here what the Journal of Social Behavior and Personality has to say on the topic in a study published under the name "The Influence of Facial Hair on Impression Formation":

Results indicated consistently more positive perceptions of social/physical attractiveness, personality, competency, and composure for men with facial hair.

So women see men with facial hair as:

  • More attractive
  • More charismatic
  • Smarter and more capable
  • Calmer and more in control

And here's how the Journal of Personality and Individual Differences weighs in a paper entitled "The Effects of Facial Hair Manipulation on Female Perceptions of Attractiveness, Masculinity, and Dominance in Male Faces":

Male faces displaying a full beard were considered the most masculine, aggressive, socially mature, and older. Males with a light beard were considered the most dominant. Males with light stubble were considered to be the most attractive, light stubble was also preferred for both short- and long-term relationships.

The study "Do women’s preferences for men’s facial hair change with reproductive status?" further establishes that women (especially ovulating / fertile women) favor men with heavy stubble.

For our purposes, that means that some kind of stubble or light beard is the way to go.

But which facial hair style is the right facial hair style? That's what I'll show you today.

Constructing Your Sexy Vibe (and Making Girls Go Nuts)

Ricardus Domino's picture

sexy vibeI couldn’t believe it when she told me…

She was 25 years old and had a banging hot body… one that I was just about to peal out of her sexy, tight jeans. She had a belly button piercing and fake boobs… yet here she was lying next to me, telling me she was a virgin.

Just when you think nothing’s going to surprise you anymore… well, meeting women during the day truly is Forrest’s proverbial box of chocolates.

But, at least that explained why it had taken me a while to get together with her.

Most women will sleep with a guy the first night, so long as he sets the right frame as a sexual man and creates a sexy vibe… but if she’s never been with a guy before, it may take her a bit longer to get truly comfortable.

In one of my most recent articles, on the girl who says she has a boyfriend and why it doesn’t matter, I wrote about nymphomaniacs, strippers and party girls… and how much fun they can be. Today, I’ll talk a bit about the opposite end of the spectrum… and I’ll let you in on some of the secrets of hooking up with girls who are far less wild and far less experienced.

That can be a very interesting experience in its own right… in fact, one good friend of mine and fellow dating coach specializes in virgins… he gets a kick out of being the first man in a girl’s life and teaching her the ins and outs of one of the best things life has to offer.

But why would a virgin go with a professional seducer, out of all people?

Recommended Reading

Chase Amante's picture

recommended readingHere's another diversion from the ordinary (we're getting a lot of that this week - the "Do You Like Someone?" infographic yesterday, and now a book post), but we had a few requests over the past few days for a recommended reading list... and since those are fun to do and I haven't done one on here before... well, here you go.

I've broken these down into sections via category. Some are books everyone's going to love... some are books only certain folks will. I'll note which books will appeal to which people in the descriptions.

Anyway, who's this post good for? This is good for anyone who wants to read on a wider selection of topics - or anyone who's curious to explore some of the literary background of a lot my own personal thinking.

Note: yes, the links to books on Amazon below are affiliate links. No, you don't have to buy the books via the links included. But they're there if you need them.

Book Excerpts: Be a Strong Man

Chase Amante's picture

be a strong manThere's no denying it - women love a strong man. Forget the whole "sensitive man" fad that swept through the West... women might say they want a sensitive man, but the sensitive man isn't the one who actually stirs their heartstrings... or their loins, for that matter.

But how do you be a "strong man?" Do you have to be a bodybuilder, or be skeptically squinting your eyes at everyone and everything all the time?

In fact, that's hardly the case. To be a strong man is something entirely different from muscles or a stubbly face (although, those two can certainly help). It's about a lot more than that, as it were.

In this section from my eBook How to Make Girls Chase: Every Tactic and Technique You Need to Get the Girl(s) of Your Dreams, I detail for you some of the most important elements in coming across with the women (and the men) you meet as a strong man. And they aren't what you might think they are... read ahead.

How to Be a Good Lover (and Give a Girl Orgasms)

Ricardus Domino's picture

how to be a good lover“Nothing much to do... I’m at home and I think I’m so addicted to your passionate sex... I still can’t get over last night… I love it.”

If you’re not regularly receiving text messages like that, even from seasoned party girls - and you could use a primer on how to be a good lover - read on.

The next text she sent me was:

“Hmm… what is your secret magic?”

I didn’t tell her… but I’m going to tell you.

And if you don't know how to make girls crawl the walls, you really need to learn how to. It does a lot for your confidence… and it does a lot for your ability to hang onto a girl you really like.

Really, there's no reason that you shouldn't be able to give a girl an orgasm multiple times when you're sleeping with her.

And once you're able to do this, then you can approach women knowing that you will give them the best sex of their lives... And that's powerful.

Tactics Tuesdays: How to Be a Warm Person

Chase Amante's picture

how to be a warm personCommenting on the post on building social status, a reader asks the following about how to be a warm person:

Hi Chase, great site, great article. Could you discuss more about warmth? You discuss it quite often, but you could dive into this topic more in-depth? It's a powerful tool to use in all aspects of life, so your breakdown of this would be much appreciated!

Thanks

Happy to oblige, Anonymous.

Back in 2001, a young female customer walked back into the tire store where I worked as a technician and salesman to complete a transaction she'd begun the day before with me. I wasn't there, so another salesman helped her. "That guy who helped me yesterday was nice," she told him, referring to me, "but I felt like he had bad intentions."

When this salesman told me she'd said this, I was surprised; I knew I'd adopted an edge over the past few years - it had been designed specifically to make sure no one would want to fight me, since I was always alone and frequently in dangerous situations. But I didn't think it was actually scaring off women.

I went to work trying to change it, but even a year later, friends on my college dorm room floor told me, "The girls on the 7th floor said, 'That kid with the red hair is scary.'"

When I heard this, the first thing I thought was, "All right. I've adjusted my face for men - to be intimidating and frightening - long enough. It's time I adapt myself for women instead."

Within a few years, I was regularly hearing things like the following:

"I only just met Chase, but I felt like we'd been friends for ages."

"It's so great hanging out with you; I feel like I can tell you anything."

"Spending time talking to you makes me feel like I can breathe."

How I figured out how to be a warm person and how I made the switch to that from "scary and intimidating" is what I'll detail in this post.

How to Get What You Want (with Women and Life)

Ricardus Domino's picture

how to get what you wantEver find yourself wondering how to get what you want?

When was the last time you did something that was clearly not in your best interest?

Don’t worry, we all do it sometimes… In fact, most people do it A LOT:

  • We go on a diet, and then order a pizza the next day.
  • We sign up for a gym, pay the membership for a full year and then stop going after a month.
  • We set a financial goal, and then never seem to get around to starting that business.

Do any of these sound at all familiar?

Why does this happen?

I mean, it’s not like it’s hard to figure out HOW to do these things… as Tony Robbins says, “We know what to do.”

Yet for some reason, we always feel caught and smile the smile of recognition when Robbins adds: “…but we don’t do what we know!”

What would it do for you, if you could take control of your own behavior and DO what you know will ultimately improve your life? If you suddenly found yourself with the power to get what you want? How much better would your love life be… how much more money could you earn… and how much better would you look in the mirror?

The 9 Secrets to Being a Sexual Man

Ricardus Domino's picture

sexual manWhen you first meet a woman and you both don’t know each other that well yet, you may be wondering… what kind of girl is she? Does she want a casual relationship, or is she looking for something serious? Is she open minded about having sex the first night, or does she have moral judgments about that sort of thing?

The good news is – she doesn’t know any of these things about you either. So it is up to you to present yourself in the light that you want to be seen in… to set your very own relationship expectations... and to put the relationship in the context of your choice.

For example, I once had a friend who was looking for a wife. He met a girl on the internet, and when I saw the two of them together, she seemed to be exactly what one might want in a wife: conservative, loyal, “hard-to-get” and trustworthy.

The question is, however: did she just present herself that way because my friend had subcommunicated his expectations?

What if I had been the one to meet her on that dating site instead of him… and what if I had told her that I enjoy my single life?

What if I had implied that I was a sexual man - that I think casual sex is fun, healthy and perfectly okay?

You can bet MONEY that she would have presented herself in a very different light indeed… and that an entirely different relationship would have resulted from the first date.

So the question is… what kind of relationship do YOU want?

I’m guessing that you want sex to be a part of the relationship… and if that’s the case, read on. There are only nine things you can subtly clarify on a date, and if you do it right, she will likely be fine with a casual liaison.

In fact, even if you’re looking for a girlfriend or something more serious, it’s still a good idea to start that relationship very passionately.

Later, when you look back on the weeks when you first met, you want to be able to say that you were so crazy about each other that you couldn’t resist… and that your love story started off with a bang!

Also, once you’ve had sex with a girl, the questions of WHETHER and WHEN to sleep together is finally off the agenda, and you can just be normal around each other. Now you can get to know her without this question looming over your heads.