Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad | Girls Chase
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  2. Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad

Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad

Picking Up Girls: Take Her Number or Take Her Home?

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By: Alek Rolstad

pick up: take number or take home?When you’re out picking up girls, the question is: do you take her home now, or take her number to meet up with her later? It depends – on several things.

Hey guys. Welcome back.

Today I’ll cover a rarely discussed subject: when to go for numbers or try to seal the deal right there and then. Next week, I will discuss whether you should try to have sex with her that night or try to see her another time. Maybe she is at your place, and you could try to have sex with her, but some resistance is in the air. So when should you “give up” and go for another date?

The goal is to decrease potential pitfalls and increase your chances of sealing the deal, improving your consistency.

I am not going to lie. Whether you should go for it that night and when you should play it more calmly and opt for a day two can be hard to tell as a beginner or even as an intermediate.

I hope this post will help you with these assessments.

3 Reasons Women Will Resist You (+ How to Artfully Persist)

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By: Alek Rolstad

persistance through resistanceWomen may resist a man’s romantic advances due to three (3) different causes: low compliance, FSD, or ASC. Identify which your problem is to get things moving again.

Hey guys and welcome back.

Previously I discussed how to persist and calibrate your persistence. You’ve learned how to use the different forms of persistence and when to use them. Today I’ll discuss how you can deal with resistance through persistence by persisting the right way.

You will typically have to persist when dealing with resistance. Persisting is a form of resistance, broken down into:

  • Lack of compliance – (or attraction, not to be confused with rejection). See this post for details. It goes over how to tell whether you are dealing with a form of resistance or an outright rejection.

  • Anti-Slut Defense (ASD) – her resistance against your sexual move. It’s grounded in her fear of feeling or being perceived by others (you included) as a slut. See this post for more information.

  • Female State Control (FSC) – her defense mechanism against getting emotional (aroused) without feeling that this is a good choice for her. See this post.

Ideally, the key is to persist by increasing her compliance toward you. If you are using the passive and the passive-active form of persistence, which involve compliance building tools such as breaking rapport/disqualification and social proof and jealousy plots that deal with the cause of her resistance, you will skyrocket her level of full-blown compliance, making your persisted attempts more likely to work.

But how does one deal with the causes of resistance presented last time? This is what we’ll discuss and clarify here.

I am not going to share anything new or groundbreaking. I am saying this now for transparency.

This post is a recap of previous posts and builds a bridge between different concepts to give you a clear idea of how everything fits together. It’s crucial for full understanding and is often overlooked. Many guys ask me to write posts adding different concepts in context to provide information about how they all fit into the bigger scheme. This is one of those posts.

Today’s post is for players of all levels, although the level of details may make it more suitable for intermediate and advanced players.

So first, a recap.

3 Ways Men Can Persist with Women

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By: Alek Rolstad

calibration persistenceThere are three (3) ways a man can persist with a woman: actively, passively, and with a mix of both flavors of persistence. He must calibrate his persistence for it to work, though.

Hey guys. Welcome back.

I have discussed calibration a lot lately. I wrote a series on basic calibration, covering these areas:

I followed up recently with advanced posts on calibration, addressing:

  • Information gathering

  • Managing arousal spikes (three posts)

Today I will add another layer to calibration: how you should persist with women.

Just how much should you push, and do you deal with her resistance? You can blindly press on until she says yes, without attempting to solve the root cause.

Sometimes things between you and a girl go smoothly on the first attempt.

Other times you will face some resistance (honestly, this happens more frequently when you are a beginner).

What causes resistance?

  • Lack of comfort or a social frame – she doesn’t feel it is right socially to hook up with you.

  • She fears feeling like a slut for being sexual around you or is afraid of being judged by others.

  • Lack of compliance (“attraction”) which you can increase by using many of the powerful tools we teach here).

Often, you can increase your chances by solving the issue at hand. If she feels a lack of comfort, set a strong social frame (show more rapport, make her invest in you, display higher social value, befriend her friends).

Next week, I will write a post about what tools to use to handle different types of resistance. I’ll focus on calibrating by using the right tools for each form of resistance.

But first, we need to discern the different forms of persistence. That is, different strategies of persistence. I’ll discuss the benefits of each and indicate when to use them.

This post is suited for seducers of all levels.

Night Game’s 5 BIG Benefits (+ How It Differs from Day Game)

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By: Alek Rolstad

night game benefitsNight game doesn’t always get a lot of love. But it has a lot of love to give. Here are 5 big benefits of night gaming… plus how night game differs from meeting girls by day.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

Considering night game is not getting much love lately, I am dedicating two posts to it to give it the love it merits. I want to convince those who aren’t into it to give it a chance. Trust me; you are missing out—just AS MUCH as those night gamers who’ve never tried day game.

What is amazing about the field of seduction and pickup is that you have a vast library of knowledge, theories, techniques, and different playing grounds with different dynamics. Various “weapons” (seduction tools) work differently in certain scenarios, while new maps will give you a unique experience. This may confuse many, but the truth is, they are just different tools—similar to a video game where you can choose the weapons that fit you best!

This makes it all exciting and fun. I had a night game student who struggled and was getting demotivated. I told him, “Hey, why don’t you try day game for a bit?” He was hesitant but eventually went for it. The change of scenery and dynamics gave him more results and made him excited again—soon, he became a better night gamer.

I see no reason why this shouldn’t work the other way around. The true seducer is the guy who masters the trifecta: social circles, day game, and night game. An advanced guy will specialize in one field (or multiple). You are wrong if you think Hector Castillo, our social circle (and day game) expert, has never done night game and pulled from it. You are equally wrong if you think that Dan, our major day game expert, has never practiced night game.

Be open-minded. Try out things and give them a chance. Stubbornness never helped anyone in this field.

Here are more reasons why night game is amazing.

Debunked: 7 Common Myths About Night Game

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By: Alek Rolstad

night game mythsMeeting girls via night game is loud, chaotic, boozy, hard, exhausting, and trashy… right? It can be… but only if you’re doing it wrong. It can ALSO be so much more…

Hey guys.

Lately, I have realized that aside from online game (mostly apps), which I don’t think are good for seduction, that day game has grown in popularity.

(Read Chase’s posts and mine for more details on using apps for seduction)

I do consider day game a fantastic way to meet girls. I won’t trash day game since it is a legit and efficient type of game. I have the utmost respect for good day gamers.

I used to practice day game back in the day and met my first real girlfriend on the bus. I once met a girl during day game who I had a threesome with on the second date. I have had instant pulls.

Even though I have dropped day game in favor of night game, it does not mean I am clueless about day game. I understand the benefits and cons.

I am not fond of day game because I am mostly busy then. I tend to be a night owl, so I am not in a good mood during the day and am usually sleepy and tired. I tend to find day game a bit dull as the process is slower. I am not saying it is less efficient than night game. In day game, you deal with FAR fewer wildcards than in night game. For me, night game is more action-packed and high-paced. Night game is pickup and seduction on STEROIDS. Any day gamer will accept this statement, even though they may not like it.

I have noticed over the years that fewer men are veering away from night game. I‘m not sure why. Perhaps it is because of the YouTube trend where cringey guys use neo-direct game, filming their one out of 200 successful approach attempts on the street. This form of game is unlikely to work in night game since they will get harshly rejected over and over. This will worsen due to negative social proof as other girls see them get rejected repeatedly, making other girls more likely to reject them in turn.

Fun fact: I saw one of those famous YouTube seducers in-field, running his stupid game—only to eventually have girls avoid and reject him before he even approached since every girl was scared of him. Worst-case scenario, you will get kicked out by the bouncer.

But neo-direct game doesn’t work in clubs, and it doesn’t work in day game anyway, so this should not be a reason to avoid night game. I honestly do not know why men are looking away from night game, but please share your reasons in the comment section.

Today I will share the pros and cons of night game. In this post, I will try to debunk a few myths and misunderstandings of night game, and help you see that those perceived cons are not bad. In my next article, I will discuss the many benefits of night game.

As you will see, it is better than you thought.

Pickup Problems Faced by Intermediate Seducers

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By: Alek Rolstad

pickup problemsIntermediate-level playboys have problems too. Their problems picking up women are different from beginners. They get some success now… but now come the plateaus, inconsistency, and ego.

Hey guys, welcome back.

Today I want to address a rarely discussed subject: issues intermediate and advanced players face with their learning curves. We often talk about difficulties beginners face, such as approach and escalation anxiety, lack of motivation and confidence, and even becoming depressed.

I know coaches who specialize in helping beginners. They spend time motivating them and playing the role of a therapist so beginners deal with whatever issue they may face while teaching them the basic skillset.

Many products are also geared toward beginners. They give a basic understanding of social dynamics and teach them the fundamentals of pickup and seduction.

Fewer products or coaching programs are dedicated to intermediate practitioners and even fewer to advanced guys. I will get to why that is.

I am careful about calling a top-tier advanced guy a student since they might hire me as a consultant to get an external perspective or learn about something I specialize in to master a new area.

Take a moment to jot down some challenges these two groups of students face. Then I will share a few words on dealing with these issues.

Logistics Checklist: What to Prepare for Good Seductions

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By: Alek Rolstad

logistics checklistMake it easier on yourself to seduce by having everything you need logistically. Including what to have on your person, on your phone, and at home at your place.

Hey guys. I hope you are doing well.

Today we will discuss the important but under-discussed topic of logistics. No matter how good you are, logistics are crucial for success. Logistics are key no matter when you approach women or what type of game you use.

The importance of logistics is undisputed. Nobody would dare disagree with this.

Logistics is everything in the interaction that facilitates or complicates the process. It includes the context in which the interaction and seduction take place. You can control some aspects and some you cannot. However, you can deal with unfortunate logistics (wildcards); see my post on the subject.

You can actively seek out some logistics (girls with two friends; sets of three are easier to deal with than sets of two), and there are others to avoid (a group of girls where one is very drunk, likely to cause wildcards later).

Today we will discuss the logistics you can control and implement RIGHT AWAY effortlessly. This post is useful for seducers of all levels.

We will discuss what you need:

  • To carry with you in your pocket or bag when you go out

  • To have at your place when you pull her home

Sometimes logistics alone can get you laid. It is not that common, but it does occur. However, bad logistics can ruin many potential lays. Once, I forgot to have cigarettes at home, which led me to nearly lose a threesome with two very cute Finnish girls in 2009. A student of mine missed a potential lay because he forgot to download Uber or any transportation app! Trust me, losing a lay because of stupid logistic issues are frustrating as hell, and you can easily avoid these pitfalls.

Well, no more with this post.

This list will be extensive. I have been into this for over 15 years, and I have been in almost every logistic loophole imaginable. So some of my advice can counteract some uncommon situations, but the little effort required on your end to avoid facing it makes it worthwhile to consider.

I am not claiming that you need to have everything listed here to get laid. Even if your logistics are not perfect, you often can get away with it—until you don’t. It is the latter scenario that I dedicate this post to. Logistics are a requirement to get laid in most circumstances. Bad logistics can ruin your game if you don’t take care of them. So, let’s take care of them, and if you implement most if not all the advice listed here, you can safeguard yourself from much trouble.

Can You Get Every Girl?

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By: Alek Rolstad

get every girlIs it possible to attain every girl if you get good enough with women? Or are there limits? A realistic look at the upper echelons of ladykilling skills.

Hey guys.

Today I would like to offer a few words about what is achievable and what we can hope to attain in pickup and seduction. There are two schools of thought on this subject.

The first is the pessimistic view that a girl is either into you or not, and at the first sign of a challenge, you need to consider it a rejection.

And the other is the optimistic view that you can get any girl.

Both these extremes are flawed. I will attempt to show you why and then present my view.

We will approach this by covering both views first and discussing why each is flawed. Then I will give you my perspective, which is a synthesis of both.

How to Be Consistent Picking Up Girls

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By: Alek Rolstad

pickup consistencyThere are many ways to be more consistent when out picking up women. More seductive tools, greater awareness of your surroundings, less reliance on mood, and more.

Hey guys. Welcome back.

This post is for advanced guys or those who want to work their way into the advanced level.

I’ve written much about consistency and getting results consistently before. I’ve also written about getting a high meet-to-lay ratio (how many you meet compared to how many you seal the deal with).

Both are closely correlated since a higher meet-to-lay ratio means more consistency.

Getting a high meet-to-lay ratio and becoming consistent correlates with how tight your game is and how good you are with women.

I’ve mentioned that calibration was the key to the high meet-to-lay ratio, and thus consistency. I want to elaborate on what leads to consistency. So today, I’ll discuss what makes one consistent.

First, a few words on the meet-to-lay ratio.

How to Compete with the Other Guys Texting Her

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By: Alek Rolstad

men on her phoneAs more and more men crowd into women’s profiles and messages, how do you get a girl’s attention on the phone? By declining to compete the ordinary ways.

Hey guys and welcome back.

Earlier this year, I discussed how neo-direct game makes everything much harder. It can trigger premature rejections as women display high standards from being in a position of power, which you put them in by showing too much interest too early.

Because of the surge of neo-direct game, many men who experiment with cold approach pickup would face harsh rejections and find women acting testy and displaying insanely high standards (because men put them in a position where they do so).

To add to the frustration, the popularization of online dating apps such as Tinder have a bad male-to-female ratio (over 70% of men). Plus, women often use Tinder to promote their Instagram. It is discouraging to be ignored constantly and not receive likes and not have girls respond to your messages.

So men feel that women have high standards:

  • Men don’t get results and are ignored on Tinder

  • Men get rejected prematurely in real life from using the wrong approach

  • Women are in a powerful position to do so due to the frame men set

But there is another dimension I would like to discuss here.

Let’s say, after plenty of harsh rejections in real life, that a guy finally gets a decent hook out of luck.

Now that is awesome! I am happy for him.

He takes her number. He texts her. No response. Or maybe she responds, but now she doesn’t seem nearly as interested. And maybe when the time comes, she flakes.

We have seen an epidemic of flakes lately. There’s a reason why texting products are in high demand. It’s extremely frustrating not to get a response from a girl you thought you had a good shot with, but when she flakes, it is devastating.

This is the subject I want to discuss today. I will not cover the basics for why women may flake, which could be summarized as:

  • Her mood may change when you are not around. She was stimulated when you met her, but tomorrow is a different day, and she’s in a different mood.

  • As time has passed, she may have forgotten how you made her feel. Her compliance lowers.

  • Because of the limitations of texting (she can’t hear your voice, see your face, and vice versa) and you are not communicating in real-time, you cannot calibrate on the spot.

So she may flake.

But something has changed over the years. Back in the day, a solid interaction and some good texting would have a higher chance of leading to a meet-up than today. Of course, flakes always occur. That’s just the way things are. But things have gotten worse.

Why is that? And what can we do about it?