Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad | Girls Chase
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  2. Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad

Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad

Is It Moral to Be a Hedonist?

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By: Alek Rolstad

is hedonism moral
Many guys who learn pickup and seduction struggle with the morality of living a hedonistic lifestyle. This is a legitimate dilemma, so let’s get philosophical.

Hey guys. Welcome back. Today I will take a step away from the technical posts and share more of a reflection.

Over the years, I've seen that the philosophy of picking up women and seduction is closely related to hedonism. Both defenders and critics have used the hedonist argument to both praise and criticize pickup.

Pickup is viewed as hedonistic because the element of pleasure, or more importantly, short-term sensual pleasure is central. Some, including our own Hector Castillo, have presented some solid analysis on the main blog and the forum.

I would like to give you my take on the subject. Honestly, I doubt my opinion will differ much from Hector’s, but I may add some different perspectives.

Some questions we will try to answer are:

Whether or not you agree with my points is irrelevant. The purpose of this post is to offer another perspective that may help you evaluate your values and perhaps even challenge your ethical system so that you may come out stronger.

How to Get Those Attention Seeking Club Girls

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By: Alek Rolstad

attention seekers
You’re in a club. A girl walks by and grabs your ass. Then she bolts and won’t talk to you. WTF? She’s an attention seeking freak, and here’s how to get her in bed.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

Today I’ll respond to a question guys have asked on the forum. I assumed other men would enjoy having this question answered, too.

The question is: How do we deal with freaks in clubs?

Freakiness tends to be amped up to 11 in night club scenarios. Some of you may not be familiar with the term “freak.” It was coined by a deceased seducer called PlayerSupreme (RIP). According to him, there are three types of women:

  1. Good girls (nice, kind, affectionate girls); however, HE NEVER claimed that those girls were asexual Madonnas

  2. Hoes (the gold digger and status seeker)

  3. Freaks (weird girls who use their sexuality to gain power and get male attention; they tend to have higher sex drives than other women, but not always)

So, today’s discussion will be about how to deal with the third type of woman. For a better idea of what we are discussing, here’s an example.

Say you are at a club having fun. Out of the blue comes this girl who tells you something sexually explicit, acts in a sexually explicit way, or touches you in a sexually explicit way.

She may tell you how much she likes sucking dick, or perhaps she simply comes up to you, grinds her ass on you, or even touches your dick.

And you, happy as a clam, believe she is doing this because she is:

  • Super horny (easy prey)

  • Very sexually open, one of those “sexual women” (I have discussed this topic many times; this is usually a bias; those who seem most sexually open are not necessarily those who are)

  • Really into you

Pleased and excited, you reciprocate her move. You start showing sexual interest in return. You may touch her or make an overt move.

Only to realize that the moment you do, she walks away.

When you try to re-engage, she turns cold or starts ignoring you. It is frustrating. What the heck just happened? (I'll answer this in a bit.)

Even worse, you realize she’s now flirting with another guy, probably doing the same thing she did to you.

“But she was such easy prey; she showed so much interest in me.” You are a bit dumbfounded and creeped out.

The truth is, you have been played. And I will tell you how and why.

How to Use Plausible Deniability to Get Her to Leave with You

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By: Alek Rolstad

how to get her to leave with you
Women often resist going home with you because they don’t want to appear slutty. To bypass this issue, all she needs is plausible deniability, which you can provide.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

Today I want to discuss a phase that many men struggle with: the extraction phase. It’s a phase prone to resistance and also the time you get an indication of whether you have successfully built compliance and dealt with her resistance even though other factors like mood changes, wildcards, and logistical factors may pop up at the last minute.

Therefore, I consider this phase important to master. You may get lucky, things may go smoothly, and she goes home with you without you delivering a tight game. But that is simply pure luck, and you cannot rely on this.

You must always try to go for the extraction, whether you feel the vibe is perfect or subprime. The number one reason men do not get laid consistently is that they do not make an invitation for it. They do not try to get the girl to leave with them; they do not try to extract.

Some guys may be too nervous about doing it, or it could be they want to protect their ego and not take the chance to ruin the connection. It feels so much better for your ego to leave a girl, falsely believing you could have banged her. But the truth is, if she did not leave with you, there is no “could have banged her.” You either bang her or you don’t. If you do not try to extract, you will never know.

So, always be extracting.

Even if the vibe is not right, and closing time is near, it is better to just go for it. You never know. Maybe she is an easy one; maybe she is not that into you. She might just decide that it is late and wants to have fun. You don’t know unless you try.

So, always be extracting.

In the past, I’ve discussed how to extract and get her to leave with you. I have also gone over how to go to a girl’s place (the system is very similar, just a few tweaks added).

Here’s the system:

  • Reach a high note (generate compliance, reach a peak in emotions and compliance, and strike)

  • Give a reason to leave (“It’s so loud in here.”)

  • Find an excuse to go back to your place (“Do you like wine? Ah, good, let’s get back to my place and continue this conversation.”)

  • Lower the pressure (“I don’t live far away.”)

  • Persist (back off, build more compliance, handle potential resistance)

  • Try again if you fail (persistence)

This template applies here as well and is probably the standard model most would agree with.

What we will discuss today is how to use plausible deniability to aid your extraction.

We’ve examined this subject before, but I want to give my take on it and add some key points.

Set a Sexual Frame by Blaming Women for Being Freaks

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By: Alek Rolstad

set a sexual frame
To get a girl in bed quickly, it’s vital to set a sexual frame early. These one-liners are designed to do just that, by blaming women for being sex-crazed maniacs.

Hey guys. I hope you are doing well.

Today I will share some basic one-liners that can help transition your interaction into sex talk, or at least help set a sexual frame with a girl. We all understand the value of sexualizing your interactions with women in terms of moving things toward sex.

Specifically, the benefits are:

  • You get her aroused

  • You give the interaction a sexual context, which makes her perceive you as a sexual guy

Remember, women tend to categorize men as either providers or lovers. The provider is just a good guy to keep around, providing resources like wealth, social status, social-climbing opportunities, and networking. Most of these guys get laid rarely, especially if they are lower-end providers. Higher-value providers can get laid often, but not as often as a lover. A lover is the guy women trade sex for sex with, and so he's most likely to get laid easily and quickly.

If you just want to get to the one-liners, jump to the section called “Blaming: Sexual Framing Technique.” Otherwise, if you'd like to gain a better understanding of the core principles involved, read on.

Pickup and Seduction Gambit: The Good Lover

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By: Alek Rolstad

good lover seduction gambit
To get women in bed fast, adopt a lover’s frame. This gambit accomplishes that with sexual prizing and by displaying your deep understanding of women.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

Last week, we discussed the lover’s frame, what it was, and how it is created. The lover’s frame is different from the provider frame, which involves impressing women with mostly economic resources. Sometimes it gets men laid as a reward for providing for women, but usually, all they may get is a bit of female affection, similar to the friendzone. In best-case scenarios, these men will VERY occasionally get lucky, get laid accidentally, or end up in a relationship, often with a subprime girl, or sometimes with the girl of their dreams.

Back in the day, those relationships likely resulted in marriage, and because of sociocultural factors, those marriages would remain stable. But with today's sexual liberation, this is not the case. Being a provider today is much less likely to be a fruitful mating strategy.

All you do as a provider is pay and provide for little, if anything, in return.

You have a choice: to get political and try to change society, or play the game and calibrate according to the current rules. The latter is the strategy I favor, and sadly, many men hate me for it.

The lover frame allows you to:

  • Get laid like a rockstar if that’s what you want, and enjoy a deeper form of erotic connection with a woman who will respect you as a man, not as a result of your wealth

  • Have better sex, and more quickly

  • Experience less frustration in the seduction process

  • Move from banging like a rockstar to building a relationship with the right girl; you’ll have a relationship that builds upon a sexual connection (and from there, a REAL emotional connection)

So, a win-win more or less.

There are two main effects of a strong lover frame:

  1. You generate desire as a man who can create strong emotional connections. Any gambits that display sexual prizing can work here. Some examples of gambits that accomplish this include the eight types of orgasm gambit, the orgasm control gambit, the tantra gambit, and the therapist gambit.)

  2. You make her feel allowed to act upon her desires. You want to be a man she can allow herself to be sexual with, both socially, but also emotionally (she feels you are the right guy, and you don’t judge her). Low-keyness also helps. Notable gambits here are any that communicate sexual liberalism: the period paradox, the mirror, to name a couple.

Now, what if we can use this knowledge of the lover frame as a gambit itself? This is where it gets interesting.

Why "The Lover" Always Wins the Dating Game

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By: Alek Rolstad

lover vs provider
Should you come across as a lover or a provider? Let’s examine why the lover’s frame is always best, no matter the type of relationship you want with a girl.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

In this post, I’ll discuss two aspects of seduction men need to consider to achieve great success with women.

There have been many theories that split concepts into categories, phases, or into different aspects, like “the five pillars of seduction,” etc. Today I want to break it down to its core.

The framework I’ll present will be very intuitive and broad, yet I’ll give examples as we proceed.

You may have certain frameworks you already use to make sense of the world of seduction and women. There is nothing wrong with that if it is helpful. However, you may encounter a competing framework that you happen to find equally interesting. Yet, it is not coherent with your usual framework. This will not be the case here.

The framework I’ll discuss is so basic that any other framework you may have will be compatible. If it is not, then your initial framework needs reworking.

Touch During Seduction: How Much Is Too Much?

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By: Alek Rolstad

sex talk and touching
Touch is vital to seduction, but too much can trigger resistance. At what point can touching backfire, particularly when you’re talking about sex?

Hey guys! Today I will delve into typical issues related to calibration. For example, how much should you escalate while delivering “impactful” verbal game like sex talk or hypnotic patterns meant to sexualize conversation and stimulate her?

I get this question a lot. How much should you touch a girl when you talk about sex? I realize I have not publicly given a good answer to this question, and that’s why I would like to cover it here.

There are no crystal-clear answers. Some prefer to touch more than others. Both strategies have pros and cons. Like many techniques in the field of pickup and seduction, it comes down to which advantages you favor for the price of associated disadvantages.

Let’s begin by stating some universal facts.

Who Should Do the Most Talking During Sex Talk Seduction?

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By: Alek Rolstad

sex talk seduction
Sex talk is a powerful seduction tool. But when the conversation gets juicy, should you do all the talking or let her chime in? Here are the factors to consider.

The other day I had a very interesting group conversation with Dan, Pablo, and Velasco about investment when delivering sex talk. They all had different perspectives based on their style (remember, they are all part of the “sexual game school”), and all were correct based on the way they do things. From their observations, we agreed that all our pointers had pros and cons.

The discussion was about whether you should do most of the talking when delivering sex talk, or get her to invest back.

My conclusion: it’s dependent on the girl and the circumstances, and also where you are in the seduction (which phase).

So, this is what I will discuss here.

First let’s briefly cover the arguments of the pros and cons of having her invest and participate rather than doing all the talking yourself.

This post is ideal for advanced players who want to add additional calibration to their verbal game. Beginners should do 60–65% of the talking, and let her do 35–40% (approximations, not rules set in stone).

We will focus mostly on sex talk, but I strongly believe it applies to any verbal game. The tips below will help create a verbal game that:

A powerful verbal game sets a sexual frame, a high social value, or can be very hypnotic. Weaker (or fluffy) verbal game is different because it is far less powerful, so it is better to have her invest more in that case, because if you are doing all the talking, it will not be as powerful. So you may as well make her invest.

Pickup and Seduction Gambit: The Secret House

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By: Alek Rolstad

pickup seduction gambit: the secret house
This seduction gambit is designed to make your girl visualize a liminal space (or bubble) in her mind, causing her to feel sexually liberated and horny.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

Today I will share another gambit that uses the concept of liminoid space that we've discussed for the last few weeks.

A liminoid space is an area within the bigger whole (culture, society, etc.) where the rules are blurred, usually leading to liberation and freethinking.

Here are the relevant articles if you want more info or a recap:

The idea with this gambit is to make her visualize such a space, adding liberated aspects to it. From there, you’ll free her sexually.

To start this off, I’ll give you an idea for a transition. Also, remember these posts illustrate how I do these gambits (my recommended version). Feel free to modify them to fit your own style and personality.

Pickup and Seduction Gambit: Sexual Tension and Liminality

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By: Alek Rolstad

pickup and seduction gambit sexual tension
This seduction gambit uses the concepts of liminality and sexual tension bubbles. In fact, its objective is to create sexual tension by talking about sexual tension.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

Today I will share a gambit that builds upon the concept of liminality, which I've covered in recent posts. Liminality is a concept taken from anthropology to describe the transitional phase in a society that is "betwixt and between." It's the time period in which “what is” has been broken down, and “what is to become” is yet unknown.

We also discussed how liminality could help us understand certain aspects of seduction, and seduction as a whole.

We saw how liminality could help us make sense of sexual tension, a powerful yet rather vague tool. Most good seducers are aware of the power of sexual tension. There is no doubt that it is one of the most powerful tools in a seducer's arsenal.

The issue of sexual tension is twofold:

  • How do we explain what it is? It is such an odd experience that one may have difficulty describing it.

  • How do we generate it? Most experienced seducers have witnessed the power of sexual tension, but few have a good method for generating it at will. We’ve tried to not only understand sexual tension but also to figure out how to generate and maintain it.

If you’d like to read my series on sexual tension, including how to generate and maintain it, you are welcome to do so. I also have a cool “sexual tension” report.

Today, I will share a verbal gambit that can help you generate sexual tension. Yes, we are talking about inducing sexual tension with a conversation.

Before I get into the gambit, note that some nonverbal elements play a significant role in whether this gambit will help you generate sexual tension and how much you will be able to generate.

These nonverbal elements include:

  • Eye contact

  • Gestures and body language (recommended: relaxed and slow)

  • Tonality and pace of voice (recommended: a slower, darker voice with pauses; if you know how to use a hypnotic voice, use it here)

If you are a beginner or intermediate, or perhaps an advanced guy who does not have a strong verbal game, you may not achieve the full effect.

However, even if you do not manage to generate sexual tension, or do so weakly, I still would not consider it a failure. There are MANY other great benefits this gambit can provide! I will discuss those further after sharing the gambit itself.

This gambit is recommended after an initial hook, preferably in an isolated setting with lots of compliance. The vibe between both must be quite sexual. The purpose of this gambit is to escalate things further.