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Social Commentary

How to Avoid Being a “Nice Guy”

Halvor Jannike's picture

In both the seduction community and the Manosphere, the term “beta male” is the diametrical opposite of the “alpha male”. He is also a contagious meme in the popular culture, but he is, contrary to the “alpha male”, usually referred to by folk terminology.

He is known as a “nice guy”.

avoid being a nice guy

As discussed in the previous article about “alpha male” and “sigma male” strategies, the term “beta male” is used in an imprecise way in the seduction community and the Manosphere, and I will thus not use it in the rest of this article. However, the almost synonymous concept of a “nice guy” is used in a rather consistent sense in contemporary society and it thus makes sense to discuss what characterizes him.

While there is much advice around on how socially dominant men behave and how to become more socially dominant, there is the problem that the advice usually only attempts to fix superficial behavior patterns of such “nice guys” and does not treat the underlying psychological conditionings that created the “nice guy” in the first place.

This is problematic because it causes incongruence, usually in the form of dominant behavior patterns that are in conflict with the underlying “nice guy” belief system.

There is also an incongruence problem in that a player lifestyle will generate reference experiences that are often deemed as negative in the “nice guy’s” belief system. This article will discuss how the “nice guy” has been conditioned and how the “nice guy” can recondition himself on multiple levels in order to become more socially successful. But first we will discuss why all these “nice guys” are around in the first place.

Why Do Girls Have Gay Friends?

Guest Contributor's picture

Note from Chase: this is a guest post from Sarah Williams of Wingman Magazine. In this article, Sarah shares the features in gay men that women find so alluring, and why women keep gay men in their lives and around them. If you haven’t spent much time in gay bars, you might be surprised how cute and sexually available the women who hang around gay men can be; if you’d like a peephole into why this is, this article’s a solid primer on the subject. Take it away, Sarah.


Imagine the scene: a bar, a pretty girl or even a group of good looking girls, all hanging out with just one guy in their circle. He doesn’t seem to be a Dan Bilzerian playboy type either. He’s just their friend, laughing and having a great time with all of them. This lucky guy is simply surrounded by hot females, who all get along very well with him, instead of hanging out with a bunch of dudes talking about football. He doesn’t seem to be doing anything special, but the most beautiful chicks stick to him like bees to a honeycomb... They all have so much fun together!  He treats the presence of beautiful girls around him as a naturally comfortable situation. Why couldn’t that be you who so easily enters and enjoys a group of beautiful girls without being completely awkward?

girls like gay guys

There is one major different between you and him – you’re not gay.

You’ve probably seen at least one pretty girl or even a group of pretty girls laughing and having fun with a gay guy. I personally love to hang out with gay guys even though I’m looking for straight men. As a single woman who lives in a big city, I have quite a bit of choice with whom I hang out with. I love going out with my girlfriends, and I’m friends with guys both at work and outside of work, but most of my very best male friends are gay!  And I’m definitely not the only female who appreciates their company…

What makes gay guys so special that women love to hang out with them?  What makes so many females choose gay guys as their best friends?

The answer is more complex than just sexual orientation. It touches on certain common characteristics and typical behaviors gay guys display towards women. When it comes to conquering women’s hearts, straight guys could learn a lot from gay guys.

What Does It Mean to Be a Man?

Drexel Scott's picture

It is taken for granted, as well it should be, that women respect strong men and detest weak ones. There is no way around it, and no amount of pretty, eloquent fluffiness will detract from the impact it already has on your life.

You see it everywhere: women throwing themselves at men with spines while trampling on those without and laughing in their faces.

Today’s article is not a discussion of strength in the physical sense – you can find articles on how to get in great shape elsewhere on this website. Instead, this is about a topic that I don’t often see discussed: being a man of conviction.

Some good Hollywood examples of men with conviction are James Bond and Han Solo; classic archetypal males who get the job done and get laid doing it.

be a man

Game Imbalance Hypothesis

Chase Amante's picture

game imbalance hypothesisThis is the first in a three-part series on regional sexual selection pressures. This piece introduces the concept of “game imbalance”, defines it, and posits it as a contributing cause of men’s difficulties with women.


I have an alternate theory why certain classes of men struggle with women far more than certain other classes do, on average. Alternate from what most guys cite: looks discrimination, racial discrimination, height discrimination, income discrimination, etc.

The one we’ve been seeing the most complaints from on the discussion boards lately are men of Indian descent. Asian and Arab guys struggle a lot as well. Of course, men of all races complain about their inabilities to succeed with women (and I’ve heard plenty of success stories and known personally plenty of successful guys from all of these racial groups), but some of these race-level complaints are far more ubiquitous than others.

So what makes the difference?

I have a theory. Actually, a hypothesis. I’d like to call it “game imbalance hypothesis.”

And if you’ll walk with me a moment, I’ll show you how I think the effect the hypothesis describes is hampering certain men and favoring others in the sexual marketplace.

Next Level Seduction Pt. 3: The State of the Game Address

Colt Williams's picture

This post is Part 3 in my Next Level Seduction series. This series is dedicated to illuminating and breaking down the most advanced concepts, processes, and subtleties involved in the highest level of seduction. It’s about discussing ideas that most men may not necessarily think about, and identifying the nuances of living your life as a highly sexual and desirable male. So if you’re new to the game, you can either ignore this... or try not to be intimidated. You can read Part 1 here and Part 2 here.


Greetings, my fellow men; this is Colt Williams, and this is the State of the Game address. Today I want to talk about where the game is today: what’s working in the seduction world, what trends I have noticed, what’s not working so well, and where this is all headed.

state of the game

Don’t Talk About Fight Club and Take the Red Pill

Chase Amante's picture

An interesting thread, I noticed, had popped up on our discussion boards the other day, with guys hashing around about the “manosphere” and its various merits or drawbacks.

There were some comments about how a guy started out here on GC but went over to the “manosphere” because it suited him better. There were others from other guys talking about how they started out in the “manosphere” and ended up here and found this site to suit them better. And then there were some rather balanced posts discussing the various similarities and differences and strengths and merits of each.

I, though, would like to take a brief foray into exploring some of the mentality behind much of the most vocal and grating “red pill”-esque thought you will encounter, and that of its predecessor, “Fight Club”-esque thought; if you know what I’m talking about, then you either can’t stand it or you think it’s the best thing since sliced bread.

fight club red pill

If you’re not too familiar with the pickup community or the manosphere, this’ll be new but hopefully still interesting for you, from a “social dynamics within social hierarchies” standpoint. If you are familiar, it might give you something interesting to chew on.

Why Societies Impose Sexual Moralism on Their Members

Alek Rolstad's picture
sexual moralism

Welcome back for more sexual ethics. In this post we won’t be analyzing what is right or wrong, but instead why things are the way they are.

As this website primarily discusses sexuality, relationships, and seduction, this post will cover why certain moral attitudes around these topics are the way they are. We will also try to understand why many religions and societies advocate rather asexual behavior.

In this post we will see that the reasons for why conventional (i.e., the common way of doing things) morals are dogmatic without good justification, and then we will discuss the real justification for those morals.

As a matter of fact, we might say that, conventionally speaking, having a lot of sex is immoral. We might ask the moralist why that is so and they might answer that “it just is” or something along the line of “It’s dirty; it’s important to have some self-respect.”

These are very circular and dogmatic arguments. This is the case for many other conventional moral principles and we must expect similar types of responses when we ask someone why things like polyamory, homosexuality, prostitution, and public sex are bad.

But we are still left with the question: why do people believe these things to be bad; why are people so stuck up and anti sex? Why are the conventional morals around sexuality so restrictive? The main reasons that you never hear of will be laid out in this post.

Why I Don’t Tell Women to “Step It Up”

Chase Amante's picture

A reader on the article about girls with boyfriends writes in with a sentiment I’ve noticed popping up increasingly often on GirlsChase.com:

But what really saddens me is the feminist undertone that lurks all around this thinking that on the other side look like male dominance. And the question is: Why is it men that have to become perfect? Why is there no such a need for women? Leadership, selfish genes, everything I already know. But I want a higher standpoint. Why are men the only ones that have to step up, and not women?

women step it up

This is one that in fact I’ve answered repeatedly in the comments sections of various articles... but I realize not everyone reads those, they’re kind of hard to search / keep track of, and new people roll in and wonder the same things, especially if there isn’t a single place strictly for answering a particular question. So it’s time for it to get a dedicated article.

Why don’t women have to improve? Why don’t women have to step it up? How come they get a free pass... while men have all this pressure to “be perfect”?

It doesn’t seem very fair.

The fact is though, there is TONS of pressure on women to step it up and be perfect – including, indirectly, on this site.

However, this is a men’s site for men, and asking GC to write chastisingly-worded “You better shape up your act, ladies – or else!” articles for women misses the point – that we are here to instruct men who want to up their results, rather than to be just another shrill voice haranguing those who don’t want to “follow the rules” and tell them that they’d better get their acts in gear.

How to Avoid and Deal with False Rape Accusations

Chase Amante's picture

false rape accusationsSo you met a girl at a party. Both of you had been drinking, but not so much that either of you was stumbling around, slurring your speech, or anything. The attraction between the two of you was palpable; sparks flew through the air like electric currents, and one thing very quickly led to another.

After a night of passionate fun, she left with a smile on her face, bidding you farewell. You proceeded on with your life, a little happier for the encounter.

Then, a few weeks later, a pair of uniformed police officers showed up at your door. They were investigating the rape of an acquaintance of yours – the girl you’d slept with a few weeks back. You, they said, were the alleged perpetrator.

She said you’d raped her, they told you. They needed to ask you some questions and wondered if you might come downtown with them for a chat.

Immediately, your world was turned upside down. You had no choice but to hire an attorney at $200 an hour for a lot of hours if you didn’t want a one-way ticket to the soul-destroying prison-rape gulag of the penitentiary system. Friends distanced themselves from you; you feared work finding out, and firing you on the spot because “it’s not good for the company image to have someone accused of what you’ve been accused of on the books.” And forget about finding a girlfriend; now every girl you see looks like a potential accuser to you of a crime you did not commit.

The terrifying reality is that false rape accusations are as common or nearly as common as genuine rape reports to the police, according to the most reliable of the research studies out therebut nobody talks about it.

What causes it, why it happens, what to look for, how to avoid it, and how to deal with it. It’s taboo; it doesn’t fit the “agenda”, and you’re not allowed to mention it. Talking about the plight of the legions of men preyed upon by vicious women risks distracting from the discussion of the plight of the legions of women preyed upon by vicious men, and this festering boil is left undiscussed, and young men uninformed and unprepared.

Being slapped with a false rape accusation can be one of the most terrifying, isolating, and emasculating events that can befall a man, because another individual decides to leverage the power of “the system” to try to destroy his life, often for reasons he does not know or cannot comprehend. When it happens, there’s frequently no one you can talk to, because everyone just presumes you did it... after all, why would some girl go to the trouble of filing a police report accusing you of such a crime otherwise?

So let’s talk about it, because it needs to be talked about. Let’s discuss why this happens... how to steer far clear of the women who do it... and what to do if you get stuck in some Jezebel’s fly trap.

Sexual Liberalism

Alek Rolstad's picture

sexual liberalismIn a recent article of mine I discussed “sexual freedom”, and there we covered not only what sexual freedom was but also discussed different argument for and against it. However, it is very obvious that my post was very pro sexual liberalism.

To recap quickly, in that post we described sexual liberalism as a position that allows individuals to engage in, without any judgement from others, their desired sexual practices. Most Western countries for instance do not legally restrict all that many sexual practices between two consenting adults.

Yet we agreed that sexual freedom should have some limits. For example, we would all agree here that we should not be allowed to rape anyone (I really hope you all agree!) nor cause any severe long-lasting harm to our sexual partners – like most of us would find it noxious that someone went around spreading HIV on purpose.

In other words, we want consensual sex and to minimize the possible harms of certain sexual practices. But pretty much these limitations of sexual freedom serve one and only one purpose: maximize and protect the sexual freedom of each individual. Think about it: how much sexual freedom does a rape victim have when she is being raped?

But what about other restrictions? What about sleeping with other people’s partners? What about women “slutting around” or men “perving around”? And finally, what about monogamy and the conservative family?