Opening | Girls Chase

Opening

Your initial approach: how you first start talking to that girl you really like.

When a Girl You’re After Embarrasses You

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

girl embarrasses youAt times you’ll meet women who get one over on you. They extract a free drink or meal, ditch you for another guy, use you for an ego boost, or more. How should you respond?

On our forum, there's a field report a member of ours shared where a beautiful girl he met in a nightclub tricked him into buying a drink, then strung him along after that.

The drink-buy then triggered the predictable possession/reciprocation instinct any guy who's been manipulated into buying things for women has experienced. That in turn led our forum member, who's usually a pretty solid guy, to make a bunch more mistakes and dig a much deeper hole than he normally would.

He was honest about how things went:

  • He felt tricked
  • He felt angry
  • He wanted to 'win'

... and all those emotions caused him to continue to pursue this girl, digging himself into a deeper and deeper hole.

I went through many such situations early on in my seduction career.

Most guys will -- especially guys who do night game, and especially guys who do clubs.

When it happens, you will typically know you are doing something wrong -- as Beam did here -- but you will do it anyway, driven by emotions of wanting to get back your pride, balance things out with this woman who tooled you, and save face.

But this is almost never the right course of action: it won't get you the girl, and it won't improve your outing.

Instead, you must deal with embarrassing/humiliating situations with women in-field in a different way.

When You Open Girls, Keep It Low Pressure

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

open girls low pressureWhen you open a new conversation with a girl, it should be casual. You want to keep the pressure low to avoid spooking her and scaring her off.

I was checking Reddit and came across a few interesting posts by women. Here's part of one:

[W]hen a guy walks up to me on the street when I'm going somewhere and he outright says to me something along the lines of "Hey, you're pretty, what's your name", I'm almost always startled and want to leave asap. First, because I'm usually in a rush and need to get somewhere and he's stopping me and making me be late, second, because I already know what's on his mind. And don't get me wrong - it's really nice that someone thinks I'm attractive and I don't suspect every guy to constantly think of sex, it's just... he's already stating, in his very first words to me, that he's only talking to me because he's thinking of me in a "date material" sort of way.

...

On the other hand, I've also been approached in bars, in clubs, on campus and in supermarkets/shops. What those situations had in common was me not rushing anywhere and those guys starting a conversation with saying something casual, for example asking about the lettering on my tote bag (it's sort of a wordplay). One mentioned that he thought my glasses were really cool and then showing me his, which were almost identical; another one asked me if I knew what the bar's specialty was etc.

...

Basically what I'm trying to say is: all of the successful approaches were super laid back (I didn't feel 'hunted down'), gave me a chance to escape them without saying that I'm not interested (it's actually quite hard to tell such a thing to someone) or lying about having a boyfriend (that only happens when a guy is too persisent). Those guys also made it really easy for me to get into a conversation with them and actually let me talk to them like I'm a normal person (not just an object of physical attraction), thus making it easier to either exchange numbers or just expand our social circles (without any pressure). They made me feel like a nice human being, worthy of their attention not just because of my looks but rather because they found me be an interesting person to talk to (girlfriend material or not).

I don't recall having seen posts by women on r/seduction in the past. But apparently nowadays women are going on there, making positive comments about approaches they've experienced, and encouraging men to approach. Fun to speculate on why, but that's outside the purview of this piece.

Regardless, this gal raises a topic I'd like to explore more today: that of not startling girls when you approach, by keeping your approaches lower pressure.

Why Experienced Women Reject Slower Moving, Less Calibrated Men

Chase Amante's picture
experienced women rejectDoes it seem like sexually experienced women are more likely to reject you if you’re less aggressive or don’t go for things right now? Expectations + experience are the reasons why.

We're going to talk about some fairly advanced attraction psychology in this article. However, if you stick with it, the responses you see from different types of women will start to make a lot more sense. It will also make even clearer to you the importance of moving faster and refining your calibration with women.

Commenting on my article about myths about women novice seducers often believe, a reader named Marco asked the following:

But in your experience so far, have you ever came across a girls ( "sluts") who will perceive you as too "soft" and sexually inexperienced if you asked them out on a date? Maybe its all in my head but i think there are some type of girls who reacts much better to sexually aggressive guys, might even say uncalibrated guys, who immediately suggest casual hook ups oppose to guys who want to take them out for a drinks?

Well, for one, I have, but, for two, it's not quite so black-and-white as one might think.

This article is going to be something of an unofficial companion to Alek's piece on the easiness or not of sexually liberated vs. sexually reserved women yesterday (haven't run it by him so I don't want to call it 'official'... but it's right up that piece's alley).

You can absolutely take sexually open women out on dates while still maintaining the sexually aggressive playboy frame. Likewise, it is possible to have sexually reserved women so amped up hoping you'll make something happen with them now that they become disappointed when you do not.

So, while sometimes open or slutty girls will look down on you if you try to date them rather than pull them, they may not. And while many times reserved girls will be perfectly fine with dates, from time to time they won't be.

What determines whether a girl likes or dislikes your attempts to pull her or date her?

A big part of it is the interplay between you, and your response to her signals.

Tactics Tuesdays: Screen -> NEXT -> Return

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

screen -> next -> returnWhen you’re on the prowl, and you’re not sure a woman is sufficiently liberated for your purposes, what do you do with her? Well, you screen her… next her, if she doesn’t measure up… then return.

Here's a devious little tactic you can use in social circle settings or anywhere you have a 'captive audience'.

First off: this tactic is not so well suited to cold approach.

You can use it sometimes, in some cold approach scenarios, such as early on in a bar or nightclub (e.g., if you are doing shotgun opening / hit-and-run game).

But it is really best suited to situations where you are going to see a woman again and again.

You are going to use this tactic to get girls to get on-board with the way you want to seduce them or pick them up. It will both make compliant girls feel extra special, and make non-compliant girls become a lot more compliant (if not now, then in the future).

It's simple to do, but it takes some balls.

Mixed Groups Pt. 2: How to Approach Them

Alek Rolstad's picture
sexy girls dancing with guys aloftThere are two tried and tested ways to approach a mixed group. One is to wait for the opportune moment. The other? Mystery Method.

Hey guys, welcome back.

Last week we discussed mixed groups and the tendency guys have to immediately assume that any men interacting with girls must be part of their group, when they could have met the girls that same night.

You can’t assume all men in a club will spend the entire night idle. Some approach girls eventually (especially after binging booze — if you’re able to do the same somewhat sober you’ll enjoy a significant advantage).

In my experience, most men don’t cold approach much (unless drunk) in bars and clubs, but it still happens. Cultural differences can play a part. In some more social cultures, men walk up to talk to girls more often.

What if you happen to belong to a culture where that is not the norm? It could be that the guys with the girl you fancy know each other. But does that mean they’re part of the same group?

Mixed Groups Pt. 1: Mixed or Not?

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

mixed-group-in-karaoke-barMixed groups are more challenging than single-girl sets. But are all guys with girls signs of a mixed set?

Hey guys.

I was hanging out in the Skilled Seducer chat (the live chat in our online discussion forum), and member DaVinciMatrixStyle asked a great question, which guys often ask:

Why You Eject from Talking to Girls Too Soon (Plus How to Stop)

Allen Reyes's picture

By: Allen Reyes

eject talking to girlsA lot of guys bail out of their interactions with women too soon. How do you stop ejecting from women, and start winning with them?

The worst thing to come out of most guys' mouths when dealing with women is: "Well, it was nice to meet you."

This is the classic bail out ejection line of the beginner. All the way from budding pickup artists to just a guy trying to meet a girl who gave him some eye contact at the bar.

One of the biggest mistakes beginners, intermediates and even advanced guys make is never getting rejected. They reject themselves first.

Indirect Seduction: 3 Common Misconceptions

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

indirect game closing argumentsIs indirect seduction harder than direct? Not necessarily -- not when used right.

Hey guys. Welcome back.

Today I'm sharing my final thoughts on indirect game. After a long series followed by reports demonstrating how indirect game works in practice, I've covered most aspects of this method. It is up to you to choose which techniques to use within the indirect game framework, molding them into a style that suits you.

Even though it's time to move on from this series and start discussing other subjects, I'm dedicating one last post to clear up any remaining indirect seduction misconceptions. I like to finish what I start, and I am sure many of our beloved readers feel the same way.

I'll discuss and debunk three misconceptions about indirect game:

#1 It's harder than direct game

#2 It requires more work than direct game

#3 It's less time-efficient than direct game

Once we clear up these misconceptions, my path will be clear to discuss other awesome subjects.

6 Best and 4 WORST Places to Pick Up Girls

Allen Reyes's picture

By: Allen Reyes

places to pick up girlsWhat places are the BEST to meet women at? Well, it's not dance clubs, the street, or the metro. In fact, those are among the WORST. The best include some places many don't even think to frequent.

Hey guys!

Today I’ll outline the four worst, two limbo, plus six best places to pick up girls.

This list is for the general reader, and the venues aren’t a specific level of difficulty.

Of course, if you’re already cut your teeth in one type of venue and have more experience there, your mileage may vary.

Indirect Club Game Just After LOCKDOWN (A Case Study)

Alek Rolstad's picture
indirect club gameWhat does skillful indirect game look like, when used to pick up girls? This case study follows a successful indirect club game pick up, from open to close.

As I’m about to close my series on indirect game, I’ve decided to share a report to serve as an example of how I use this game style.

In the comments sections of my previous articles, readers told me I did not share any (or enough) examples of how to use indirect game. Frankly, they were not wrong to request this. After all, examples are good pedagogic tools.

Therefore, I decided to share a report that shows how I use indirect game. I usually don’t write lay reports since they take a lot of time to type (and I’m known to be overly detailed). That said, any good seducer will agree that writing reports about your nights out and reading others’ reports are some of the best tools a seducer can use to become good.

If you decide to read through this long post, I promise you that you will become a BETTER seducer. Not only will techniques be exemplified, but you will also learn how everything comes together. I’m trying to make this a hybrid between a report and a guide.

I’ve written other reports, most using some form of indirect game:

The first part of this report covers the preparations, the early time of the night, the “getting back into it” phase when you are dealing with bad state and momentum (as you will see, this night is a bit unique since I was rusty because of the COVID-19 lockdown).

However, if you prefer reading about the interaction with the girl I pulled (I will cover this in great detail with all the juicy information), then skip to part two, labeled “The Wizard Strikes Back.” I would still recommend reading the entire article.