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(3) Journeyman

Journeyman have been at it a while and have begun to develop major good habits and success streaks as practitioners of the social arts

3 Signs She's Having an Emotional Affair (and What to Do About It)

Colt Williams's picture

emotional affairIn terms of relationships, a topic that is often discussed is cheating. Men talk about the consequences of cheating, times that they were involved with a girl who was cheating on her boyfriend or husband, or methods of preventing their girl from cheating to begin with.

But a potential relationship-destroying force that is often overlooked in the rhetoric of men is the emotional affair.

Emotional affairs can be just as detrimental to your happiness and stability in a relationship as sexual ones can be.

So today I’m going to talk about the events and signs that often lead to an emotional affair and what you can do as a man to try to ensure that you don’t end up in this position.

Why the Status of Women You Sleep with Matters in Social Circle

Chase Amante's picture

A few weeks back, I asked newsletter subscribers who’d been using Girls Chase material to send in details about their journeys doing so, that I might start building some case studies to use in some upcoming offerings and marketing material. I’ve been working my way through all these case studies – it’s been pretty intensive work – but it’s been interesting and reading so many success stories is heartening.

One that I just finished responding to was from a reader in Mumbai, India, in his late twenties and originally from Delhi. He’d been attending a salsa class in Mumbai, and had his sights set on a beautiful young female college student in the class, but had been blocked by her close friend who wanted him instead (but who wasn’t as cute).

So, rather than pursue a girl whose friend wanted him, which was going to be dicey, he followed the advice of a buddy of his and slept with a sexy MILF in the class instead – who rapidly became addicted to sleeping with him, and who then, in order to scare off some of the competition for his flirtations, let it slip to the other women in the class that he was a playboy and they should all “be careful” if they didn’t want to get their hearts broken. As it turned out, this was a great play by her to limit his options with the other girls there and keep him for herself.

social circle status

Because while our reader figured at first this would be good for him – after all, preselection is the greatest aphrodisiac – the opposite happened, and the college girls and some others started cooling off toward him, gossiping about how he could “sleep with her.”

He ended up throwing the towel in on the college girl he liked, and leaving that class (and the MILF... though he left the option open to her to sleep with him again, if she’d get her friend, a former Miss India contestant, to double up on him together with her – no word on whether that’s going down just yet) to go seek greener pastures elsewhere. It was too bad it didn’t work out, he said, but it was a good experience regardless.

What got him in the end here though was the gossiping of the woman he was sleeping with, or her jealousy – it was the social rank of her compared to the other girls in class.

How Experiences Shape Your Life

Ross Leon's picture

Experiences shape every moment of your life. From the moment you are born, you adjust to things based on everything you’ve seen and everything you’ve done.

Such an important part of our lives – the way we interpret our surroundings – is not so well understood.

Hardly any attention is focused on figuring out how to define our realities, as such vexing questions have been asked by philosophers for years, only resulting in deeper and deeper riddles.

experiences shape life

Understanding basic reality doesn’t have to be a difficult problem if you accept that you do, in fact, encounter experiences daily.

And, when you encounter these experiences, regardless of their origin, you understand that these experiences shape your entire reality, because they are the only tangible, measurable entity that you encounter on a daily basis.

If you believe that experiences shape and dictate your life, it makes sense that gaining knowledge about how this process works will further enhance your reality. In order to uncover the treasures that lay beneath, you must first break them down into simple, digestible components.

True Freedom Means Many Weak Ties and Few Strong Ones

Chase Amante's picture

One of the things that’s bizarre for me to read among all many of the comments, emails, and forum posts from new guys just discovering Girls Chase or who’ve mostly just been reading occasionally but not putting into practice is the prevalence of the “this girl or this group or this environment is TREMENDOUSLY important and I can’t mess it up” mentality.

It’s been ages since I’ve had a mentality like that... but I can relate. I felt that way often in high school, and at times after in university. Once I dialed down my involvement with social circles and began approaching women, that feeling went away and never came back.

I was free.

true freedom

At the same time, I led a more rewarding social life than just about anyone I knew – my hands full with pretty girls, and all the cool / admirable / successful male friends I could want.

Why would anybody leave themselves in such restrictive conditions that they felt like achieving one specific outcome with one tiny group of people was life or death?

We discussed this re: girls a guy might be obsessing over in “Can’t Stop Thinking About Her? Here’s Why You Need to Meet More Girls”... but it goes deeper than this, too; both with women, and with freedom in general.

We only have as much freedom as we allow ourselves, you see.

Sexual Prizing

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

What I am about to share now is one of my own personal magic bullets, and in my opinion the strongest attraction switch there is. The concept of sexual prizing has gotten me so many lays these last years that it has revolutionized my world. I came up with this concept back in 2007, and it has basically rocked my world since then. Thanks to this concept, my life for the past seven years has become better than I have ever dreamed of.

sexual prizing

In this post I will lay down the concept and also the history behind it. Of course, this post will be an introduction, so keep in mind that there is a lot more to say about this concept (which I probably will discuss on future occasions).

If you ever wondered what was required to become perceived as a lover (and many of you have asked me such a question), then consider this post a must-read for you.

How to Dispel Lingering Bitterness from an Old Relationship

Ross Leon's picture

Ending a relationship with a loved one is a difficult task for any man to endure. You know you’re supposed to replace them, not chase them. You know that going out and having fun is the better alternative to rumination. But even after learning these things, you may not be able to recreate those feelings you felt in that relationship you look back on with rose-colored glasses.

I know the exact same feeling. In my early days of finding this website, while I was still dealing with approach anxiety and the inability to pull the trigger, I found a girl who ended up taking charge and pulling the trigger herself. Unfortunately for me, when she did this, she was clearly the one in power.

dispel bitterness

Fast-forward a couple of weeks later, and my lack of experience made the relationship go sour. Logically, I was completely fine with the relationship ending, as I knew it would only be a negative influence on my life to attempt to string her along, as I would be in the position of chasing her... but emotionally, things were very different.

The Awesome Power of Tension

Chase Amante's picture

We’ve talked about building and using tension in several articles on here before:

build tension

... and we’ve also talked about defusing tension, often with humor, as well as why it’s good to not be TOO focused on making girls laugh (and defusing all the tension).

But I want to zero in on the topic of tension specifically, because I see a lot of people still not using it right, or nervously defusing it.

The fact is, tension lies at the foundation of power, and when you wield it correctly, you enable yourself to do all kinds of things socially, sexually, and romantically.

Why Women Want Multiple Partners

Colt Williams's picture

There have been many articles written on this site about fidelity (or lack thereof) and on unraveling what society has told you in order to reveal the true nature and promiscuity of women. These are articles like:

And lately a lot of men in my life have been realizing that a woman’s relationship status is often tenuous and – even more concerning – actually a poor indicator as to whether or not she would actually sleep with you (even if that status is “married”). It’s definitely an unsettling realization to come to. But, unsettling by whose standards? Certainly not by Mother Nature’s.

multiple partners

Up until this point we have yet to fully cover why women want multiple partners. But believe it or not, it’s actually in a woman’s best interest to sleep with multiple men. So today I’m going to cover why women take on – or desire to take on – multiple partners and how we as men can adapt, understand, and come to terms with that fact.

At What Point Do You Give Up?

Chase Amante's picture

In response to my statement in “Real Empiricists Test”, uForia asked a follow up question on how you can tell the difference between something not working because you’re not getting right, and something not working because it simply doesn’t work:

I think for most new guys, skepticism comes up when they follow your instructions but it blew up anyways, which questions your legitimacy. It is uncertain for many beginners like myself whether your method needs more practice or it’s just random PUA junk. Again, I didn’t say this to offend you or anything (I think you’re probably mature enough to not be offended anyways), as I’m sure you had difficulties finding what works and what doesn’t as well.

In other words, when should you give up?

when do you give up

This is a non-trivial question, and it’s one that’s pretty necessary to have some sort of an answer to. Because if you can’t tell when you’ve been tossing your time away on something that just doesn’t work, well... you can end up being that guy who goes and does 5000 approaches and still can’t get laid.

And you don’t want to be that guy.

The good news is that most people have a limit where they reach where they just give up without anyone having to tell them to do so... the bad news is that for most people that limit comes far too early, and for some it comes far too late.

How to Have Sex with a New Girl Regularly

Colt Williams's picture

You read seduction blogs. You improve your style. You learn how to approach girls. You purchase quality materials like Chase’s book. But to what end?

I think there are only two ends to learning seduction: sex and relationships. You can have sex without relationships, but you can’t have relationships without sex (at least not good ones). So really, you put in all of this effort to learn how to have sex with new girls. Maybe you want to sleep with just one new girl – a perfectly fine goal.

However, I think the ultimate aim for most men is to learn how to have sex on a consistent, regular basis. That’s what we’re in the game for. As with most worthwhile things in life, it’s easier said than done.

sex with a new girl

If you want to learn how to walk that path… read on.