Pickup and Seduction Styles: Which Will Work Best for You? | Girls Chase

Pickup and Seduction Styles: Which Will Work Best for You?

pickup and seduction styles
New to the dating, pickup, seduction world? Are you overwhelmed by the volume of information? This article will help economize your efforts in reaching your woman goals!

In my last article, we discussed how following conventional methods creates conventional results, whereas following an extraordinary method creates extraordinary results.

Too many follow conventional ideas yet expect out-of-the-ordinary results. Often this behavior creates disappointment and frustration.

A bigger issue is fear. People want to try new things but are afraid of taking the right risks to experience success that results from a tried-and-true system.

There are many different methods and systems men can use to meet and have sex with women. In this article, I’ll lay out all of them for you.

There’s been much debate in the seduction and pickup community about what makes for “great game.” Hardcore night gamers and people into one-night stands find the folks that go after online dating and consistent sex with low effort to be repulsive; meanwhile, the latter folks find cold approaching to be inefficient and inconsistent, putting in too many hours or effort for little reward. Then there are guys who commit to social circles and meet women through friends and their groups. And of course there are those who meet women and have sex by paying for it.

But which path is right for you?

 

Many Paths to the Same Goal

Women and sex are an abundant resource for men – at least to those willing to put in the effort to learn how to meet and get them.

You would think that, logically, people would understand that there are many different paths to meeting women. However, many guys simply don’t get it, and in another one of those “you don’t know what you don’t know” situations, there is little understanding of the means and merits of all the different ways to meet women.

pickup and seduction styles

My goal with this article is to lay that out for you in a simple format so that you can quickly see all the different ways to meet women and get sex and relationships, the relative amount of effort required, and the results you can expect.

For a guy’s lifetime goals, I believe that, along with career and money management, it’s important to master your relationship life as well. It’s one of the key goals to figure out before age 35 for maximum happiness. Thus, it’s essential that a guy take the time to master at least ONE process that nets him women to meet, go out with, sleep with, and have relationships with if he so desires. One process is a baseline that, once mastered, a guy can use to get women while potentially using supplemental means to get similar ends but with more focus on fun and less on pure results.

The professional athlete – and even the professional career man – spends the bulk of his or her time practicing, finessing, and mastering one particular game (basketball, football, tennis, etc.). While most professional athletes are good at multiple sports and can play them well, they focus the bulk of their time and effort on mastering ONE sport – one system – that they can champion. They become masters of that domain and that domain only because that’s the route that makes them a champion. They follow this route to championship, even if they might be good at other sports – because, in those other sports, others are champions themselves and are a better fit.

We don’t need to worry about why they’re better – they just are.

 

Different Systems Create Different Results

I met a friend over dinner. He’s dating a great girl that he met in Las Vegas – they both live in California but he was in Vegas for a Bachelor party, and she was in Vegas for a Bachelorette party. Both of them did some ecstasy with their respective groups, then happened to connect while at the same club and he managed to work around all of her deference and resistance, and they went home together to my friend’s hotel room, engaging in a crazy drug-fueled sexcapade.

They didn’t forget each other – since they both lived in the same city – and he went on a date with her later that week and hooked up once again. Somehow it seemed very familiar, he told me, and they’ve been dating for the last seven months.

After hearing this story, I told my friend that I’m jealous of his system – I’ve never been good at meeting girls at a night club on vacation in a social circle setting, which my friend happens to excel at. Then he asked about my dating life, and I told him that I’d had nine women in my bed since the year started, and I met all but two of them on the streets of New York just by talking to them when I saw them.

I’ve figured out how to talk to almost any girl I see on the street, have a very good shot at getting her number – and if she agrees to meet me, it’s virtually guaranteed that she’ll end up in my bed within a week or two. And those nine girls don’t account for the women I went on dates with from the same method and made stupid mistakes with that cost me. There was one girl who desperately wanted to go home with me after our date, and I disappointed her simply by not inviting her home because I misread her emotions.

To that, he was speechless. We toasted.

The point is, different systems create different results – and part of learning the game is to get good at different systems. More importantly, it’s key to get good at systems that get you what you want – just as much as it is key to get good at systems that you’re good at.

My friend happens to be very good at something I’m terrible at – social circle night game. I’ve seen him pull multiple women from such settings when I’ve gone out with him on trips and vacations – and he can do it while drunk and high. When I try that myself, I’ve repeatedly crashed and burned – and have thus vowed never to use that system because it’s pointless for my strengths.

pickup and seduction styles
Just because you suck at – or have zero interest in – one type of game doesn’t mean you can’t slay with another.

Instead, I’m mastering day game, which comes naturally to me, works well with my personality, and also gets me hot girls. Instead of pulling them at night on vacations, though, I get them completely sober during the day and lead them to my apartment. Guys get into trouble when they lament that they can’t succeed with one system when many are available that will create the same outcome.

So here’s a full breakdown of all the systems available to you.

 

Day Game

I will say that day game is my absolute favorite means to meet girls. With that said, it’s also the path I consciously chose to excel at, and it fits my archetype – as a minority who is somewhat socially reserved, I’ve consistently made the best impression with girls I want to meet when I meet them alone with little competition from other men.

How often are you out and about during the day and you see a beautiful woman who you would love to meet? I’m sure this is common for many men – and if you learn day game, you can meet these women, present the real you, and get them into bed with relative ease.

What’s even better – there are loads of high-quality women who stay off apps, don’t party at clubs, and don’t venture outside their closed social circle.

pickup and seduction styles
So many gorgeous, high-quality women can only be found during the day! Often these girls are hot, smart, fun, and sophisticated!

 

Advantages

  • You can meet any woman, anywhere! What’s great about day game is that you can incorporate it into your daily routine. When working a corporate job, I used to meet women on my commute to and from work, and during lunch breaks as well. Now, being self-employed, it’s even more flexible – just chat up a hot girl and grab her number between meetings.

  • There’s no competition. Just like I mentioned to my friend above, a person who day games does something very few men pursue or know how to do. Most men rely on night game, apps, and social circles to meet women – meaning these avenues have tons of competition (and women know it, too). But the guy who goes up to a girl he likes just to talk to her – that is a rare man indeed.

  • There are fewer walls. Women tend to put up a wall to men in night game and sometimes even in social circles, and guys on apps are viewed with skepticism because so many guys falsify themselves. When you meet a girl in the daytime, those walls aren’t up.

  • Results are a direct correlation of your fundamentals, skills, and vibe. As I’m seeing these days, results in day game are correlated directly to how sexy and cool you are in the moment when you meet a girl. Which means on your best days you can do great.

 

Disadvantages

  • Success is highly reliant on fundamentals and vibe. If either one of these is “off,” the results skew dramatically.

  • Approach anxiety is difficult to get over for many men. Most just find the idea of talking to a stranger, especially a hot girl, intimidating and scary. This is easily remedied, however.

  • Day game requires consistency in practice and outcome independence (as in, letting go of the failures easily) to get satisfactory results without getting frustrated or burned out.

  • Results can be highly variable depending on the environment – the experienced day gamer knows how to calibrate to different environments (with approach styles to use and knowing what to say). For the novice, these distinctions take time and effort to master.

 

Night Game

Night game is as fun as it is crazy. The night holds a certain sensual, mysterious nature that you don’t find elsewhere, which lends itself well to hedonism and sexual escapades. Plus, everybody loves to unwind, drink a little, and let loose on weekends.

And so night game is a popular means to get girls quickly for lots of quick flings. If you like high quantities of girls, quick flings, and one-night stands, flashy/slutty/hot/sultry girls, and are less worried about time constraints or girls stuck on autopilot, you’ll love night game.

pickup and seduction styles

 

Advantages

  • It’s initially easier to approach girls. A guy might have tons of approach anxiety meeting a girl alone on the street, but in a bar or club, it just feels right to approach and talk to her. If your vibe and fundamentals are good, she might even want to make out with you or dance with you right at the bar.

  • Pulls can be ultra-fast, as low as 5-15 minutes. You can even grab a girl’s number and meet her late at night when she’s away from her friends and can be discreet.

  • Night game can provide very high quantity. Even if you live in a large city with lots of day game opportunities, it’s much faster to meet a dozen girls in night game than it usually is in day game.

  • Night game can be ultra-fun because of how unexpected and fast everything transpires – the most interesting stories tend to come from night game, including bathroom and alley pulls and public sex – among others.

 

Disadvantages

  • Girls have their walls up from the get-go. These days, girls are overstimulated, so you have to really stimulate them to get their attention. You can lose their attention and the opportunity as quickly as it presents itself.

  • There are wildcards all over the place. Only the experienced man knows how to deal with her friends, drunk guys, and random problems that always happen in night game. Check out my podcast with Alek Rolstad to hear more about wildcards.

  • Girls can auto-reject just as fast as they accept you and find you attractive. As a result, learning night game tends to be a slow, arduous process for many men.

  • It’s very difficult to convert numbers and get dates. Most of the time if you meet a girl in night game, you need to make it happen then and there, or you’ll never see her again.

 

Social Circle Methods

The media and the world makes social circle seem seductive, particularly when you’re first meeting lots of new women. It feels more rewarding than cold approach when you imagine that women will treat you better, are happy to see you, can do fun things with you, bond with you, and spend a lot of time with you. You get to know them well, and you come to care about them, and they come to care about you.

There’s sexual tension between you, and girls will dance with you, drink with you, even kiss and make out with you. Despite these pros, social circle is an inherently limited system in itself – it takes years to build up reputations in solid social circles, and any mistake can cause the death of the circle. It can take years for a guy to build his status with women in the circle while watching more advanced and sophisticated men sweep up those same women.

For the novice, social circle tends to be the ultimate fantasy – and the most difficult game style to master, as it’s heavily favored for naturals who have already developed great social skills.

pickup and seduction styles
If you really fit in with a particular scene or clique, social circle game might work great for you.

 

Advantages

  • Social circle is easy for ‘naturals’ because they’ve already got the talent and knowledge it takes to make it work.

  • It’s good for getting the girls you will see over and over again in the circle – if it doesn’t happen on one night, it’s not a big deal because there’s still a shot of it happening on a different night. There will be other windows to escalate that will present themselves.

  • If you find yourself in a good social circle with hot girls, you’ll benefit from pre-selection right away, which means it will be easier to meet other hot girls outside the circle.

  • You will almost definitely see the girl again after you've hooked up with her, which is not always the case if you're going the cold-approach route. This could be good (if it goes well) or bad (if it doesn’t).

 

Disadvantages

  • There is limited availability of women. It’s high effort comparable to other means. The process takes a long time because a guy in a social circle is always waiting for the window to escalate with a girl. Generally, social circle is much more favorable to women than it is to men. You could be waiting for months for an opportunity to open with the girl of your choice.

  • It usually favors extroverted or dominant personalities. You have to show your dominance and leadership to others around you.

  • Others in the social circle will hear of your hook-ups (or attempted hook-up if you get rejected). These have huge implications as to what people think about you and future girls you may go after. This means that your escalation has to be smooth and well-received.

  • Your social circle could be judgmental and closed-minded. If you hook up with others outside of it, or if you break away to meet other women, they might frown on that. Additionally, having a social circle requires heavy maintenance and time.

 

Online Dating

Online dating changed the nature of the game since sites like eHarmony, Match.com, and PlentyofFish came out in the 2000s. Suddenly, it became easy to market yourself as single and available in a broad area, and it was simple to meet women on a virtual platform.

Some guys excel at online dating and online game – and have met super-hot girls on this platform. By and large, I see that guys need a very attractive and compelling profile for this to work, as well as a good messaging strategy to get dates and then meets.

I think that guys should always defer to in-person game when trying to meet women, whenever possible; however, online dating can certainly be a fine supplement to one’s game.

 

Advantages

  • You can online date from anywhere. It’s especially useful in spread-out cities (think of Dallas and Los Angeles).

  • It’s easy to set up systems (message systems, texting systems, date invite systems).

  • You can pipeline women of all types and in any location, even in different continents in advance of arrival.

  • It’s generally easy to filter women by what you are looking for.

 

Disadvantages

  • Online dating relies on pictures and profiles. This can be very tough if you don’t match a girl’s preference right off the bat.

  • Women who use online methods tend to be of lower quality than those you meet in the systems mentioned above. That’s because with day game, what you see is what you get; with online dating, you always run the risk of getting catfished.

  • There is extremely high competition. Guys seems to be using this as the standard to meet women these days.

  • Many messages and exchanges can go nowhere. Girls are sensitive to mistakes and receive many messages from many guys – sometimes they’re bombarded with them, especially if they’re really attractive, thus it’s very hard to stand out individually.

 

Tinder and Apps

Ah yes, we live in the revolutionary age of Tinder – where now you can swipe to meet girls halfway around the globe from the convenience of your cell phone. Tinder makes it easy to spend just 10-15 minutes to express interest in hundreds of girls, and every guy and their friend is on Tinder swiping girls to meet them.

Alas, with such a volume-centric means of meeting women, so goes the same with competition, which tends to be crazy high. Girls will assess and scrutinize every mistake, and drop you instantly. You can spend hours messaging girls hoping to set up a date, having them agree to it, only for them to flake on you for someone more compelling. Yet, despite this, guys can build pipelines of women – especially those they want to meet in other cities before traveling there.

 

Advantages

  • Apps deliver easy access anywhere. There’s very little to no effort required to meet women.

  • It’s easy to build pipelines, especially in foreign places when people travel.

  • A guy with a good, interesting profile and good openers can still meet many women on Tinder.

  • If you’re a white guy, especially a tall, well-dressed white guy, then you have access to your pick of women. If you’re an attractive minority with a solid profile, you can also get similar results.

 

Disadvantages

  • There is high competition, and most of them will be better looking and more message savvy than you. Thus, you can get many leads that go nowhere.

  • Girls who are 6s and 7s go on Tinder and apps to meet guys who are 8s and 9s. So, many guys are selling themselves short with this approach when they could get more attractive women from in-real-life game styles like day, night, and social circle.

  • There’s so much reliance on Tinder and apps that they stall growth in other game styles, especially cold approach styles such as day and night game.

  • You’ll get no exposure to the art of the approach, hooking, getting numbers, and instant dates. Thus, most guys who get good at apps tend to be atrocious at meeting women in person, and often have severe approach anxiety – which they never get over because they never actually approach women in real life.

pickup and seduction styles
If you find yourself constantly snagged on catfish, you might hook more attractive ladies in day or night game.

Check out my article on how Tinder hobbles you with game for more information on the disadvantages of Tinder.

 

Paying for Sex

The fourth and final approach to getting regular sex is to pay for it directly. Paying for sex is frowned upon in the seduction community as well as in the media and with social acceptance – and yet worldwide, there are plenty of men who pay for sex, and women who offer sex for pay.

There tend to be three types of guys that I see pay for sex:

  • Men that haven’t learned game or an effective means to get women without paying for sex

  • Men that are in committed or monogamous relationships where passion has died, and they desperately seek a new source for it

  • Men that are simply too busy in their lives to spend the time to get women when they need an outlet

In the case of that first type, there’s often massive anxiety involved with getting women, or they lack experience, so they pay for sex simply to experience it. In the case of the latter two, it’s usually a high-value man who can’t get away from the routine of life to spend the time to get women he’s really attracted to – but financially has the means to have them for a time.

Prostitution and escorts are typically for short-term pleasure especially while traveling and abroad, and sometimes locally. Paying for a prostitute is an easy way to get sex without worrying about anything long term.

 

Advantages:

  • It’s discreet. No one needs to know if you don’t want them to, and people usually only do this while traveling anyway.

  • You can meet women who love and embrace their inner slut and sexual nymphomaniac. Many girls become prostitutes or escorts simply because of how much they love sex, so they might as well make money doing it.

  • You can pick exactly the look you like – and pay to have it on-demand with little effort.

  • For the novice, this is an easy hack to get sex quickly.

 

Disadvantages:

  • It can be very expensive and also very transactional. This depends mostly on how sexy a girl finds you, the location, and her attitude.

  • There’s little to no emotional bond if any. Don’t expect a girl to like you for you, or to spend time with you. For her, it’s about the money, and if she thinks you’re sexy, she might enjoy a few orgasms along with it.

  • It’s for a limited time – just for a guy to get himself off with a girl, and it’s over.

 

Sugar Daddy and Sugar Baby Game

The sugar daddy game has recently picked up in popularity thanks to the introduction of websites such as Seeking Arrangement and What’s Your Price. By themselves, these arrangements don’t necessarily constitute game – they’re a hack for those willing to pay to get access to the same girls that guys who master social arts go after and seduce.

However, the most notable advantage of such a system is that it completely changes the dynamic of the game itself. In normal game, the guy wants sex, and the girl wants commitment or sex with the right guy, in SD/SB game, the girl wants money, and the guy wants sex or a commitment with the right girl.

Despite the role reversal, women are still women – so if you present yourself as a sexy, sexual, woman-savvy man, you can “hack” her desires and still turn her on the same as any other girl.

 

Advantages

  • There’s a complete role reversal. The girl plays the role of the guy, and instead of a guy chasing after sex from a girl with as little investment as possible, it’s a girl chasing after money from a guy with as little sexual investment as possible.

  • There’s easy access to the girl of your look and type, across all ages.

  • The competition is pretty weak (old, unattractive, out-of-shape, or socially beta guys) meaning the game-savvy guy can create very strong attraction and set up encounters for amazing sex very quickly.

  • You can use standard game to get her turned on quickly.

 

Disadvantages

  • It can be very transactional.

  • It can get very expensive.

  • Most girls making these arrangements already have a boyfriend, so her emotional availability is limited. She will mainly be seeing you for the arrangement and sex, and not for the emotional connection you provide.

  • If you’re not careful, with time, girls can control the frame and make it less and less about sex.

pickup and seduction styles
If you want a hooker/sugar-baby combo from hell, book it to Bangkok, you sexy farang. Just make sure to read this book first.

 

Each System Has Its Merits

Each system creates radically different results, and often the method you learn best will result in a different outcome. However, it’s possible to get attractive women with any system.

For instance, a guy who becomes well-versed with online dating usually struggles with adapting the same form of game to meeting women in person (night game or day game for instance). The guys I’ve seen with the most approach anxiety tend to be those that rely entirely on non-physical means to get with women, such as Tinder and online dating. These guys repeatedly struggle with other game methods, so I always recommend learning in-person game as a baseline before relying on non-person game.

 

How to Commit to a Process

If you want to maximize your success with women (and economize your efforts), it’s important to commit to a process that gets you the results you want, within the time frame and effort you seek.

Based on that, and on the information I shared above, here are the steps to solidify your system to get what you want:

  • Step #1: Understand the value and benefits of each method – and know what you want

  • Step #2: Commit to learning the process that suits you best – and build your ladder (no matter how flimsy it is)

  • Step #3: Practice discipline and refine/improve your ladder

I hope you have found this useful as an outline of all the different methods to meet women. Now it’s up to you to pick the one that works best for you and start committing to learning it.

There are plenty of resources on Girls Chase to learn all you need about the system you like best. Those bold, underlined words and phrases throughout this post are links to insightful articles written by experts in the field on those subjects. We also offer a variety of comprehensive dating programs meant to save you precious time and resources. And don’t forget to check out the forum, too!

Different systems will share many of the same factors – for instance, a date resulting from day game can be handled similarly to a date resulting from Tinder. At the end of the day, game is still game, and women are still women, so it’s truly imperative that guys focus on learning at least one method that nets them the results they seek.

Good luck and happy trails!

Varoon

Varoon RajahAbout the Author: Varoon Rajah

A New York City native, Varoon’s studied under many of the seduction industry’s leading instructors. His specialty is direct day game, where he meets girls on the street, on the subway, and in coffee shops. Varoon is the host for the Girls Chase Podcast, available on iTunes or via SoundCloud.

SUBSCRIBE TO THE PODCAST ON ITUNES

SHOW COMMENTS (2)

The Latest from GirlsChase.com