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Girls chase men differently. Some chase in aggressive ways: they'll ask you out and touch you lots. Yet others are far more demure in how they chase.
On the spectrum of "how hard do girls chase?" we have a few distinct female profiles.
There are:
- Girls who are chasers
- Girls who are forward
- Girls who are dabblers
- Girls who are demure
Each of these types is a different type of woman. She expresses interest in and pursues men differently. Her behavior is often not so much determined by her interest level in you (though that's important) as it is her 'chase profile'.
A chaser who is very into you will chase hard in obvious ways. However, a demure girl who is very into you will only give you subtle indications of her pursuit, despite those pangs for you deep in her heart (and loins).
If you're only looking for chaser girls, you will miss out on most of the women who are into you, because most girls aren't chasers. Most will not chase in blatant, aggressive ways -- even if they're into you to the extreme.
Instead, you must recognize chase behavior from each of the four different types of girls.
Then, when you see it, pounce on it.
Comments
How the chasing dynamics...
... evolves after you have slept with her a few times?
Hey Chase,
It's a useful post.
After we've slept together a few times, I normally find it healthy if she is still slightly chasing - like initiating text messaging 50 to 70% of the time. My take is that a girl who likes you, normally can't wait to communicate with you.
But I have come across a girl who is probably the demure kind. We've been together many times and the chemistry is great each time we meet. However when we are apart, I don't see my usual kind of dynamics where she initiates communication most of the time. It has puzzled me a bit. She would fit very well your description of the demure girl... Except that we have already slept together many times.
So I would be curious to hear your take on how chasing changes after you already slept with her a few times, i.e. past the courtship stage? Especially regarding the demure kind. Do they still tend to stay away from chasing?
Girls Not Chasing Post-Intimacy
Pierre-
Many women will chase post-sex. Some chase a lot.
However, like your girl, there are some who won't. Could be she is very demure, and believes it is the man's place to initiate conversation, and that she'll look overeager or unwomanly if she does so herself. Or she could have an avoidant attachment style and feel uncomfortable in a pursuer role.
So there is nothing wrong with this girl doing this... it's not necessarily a bad sign if she doesn't initiate. Some women are just very passive. The more important thing is "does she keep her schedule open enough for you and does the relationship progress at the speed you'd like it to progress at"?
Chase
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