Tactics Tuesdays | Page 6 | Girls Chase

Tactics Tuesdays

Tactics Tuesdays: Recovering from Botched Escalations to Sex

Chase Amante's picture

failed escalation to sex
When you try to have sex with a girl, but fail, often that's it: you won't get another shot with her. Yet all is not lost with her – you still have options.

Failing in your escalation to sex is, often, a kiss of death.

You were inches away from intimacy with a girl... and then you didn't reach sex.

Perhaps you started to kiss her alone at your place, but she broke things off and left. Or you got her clothes partly off and had your hands on her body, only for her to get up, dress, and depart.

What's more maddening still is the power dynamic shift that occurs after a failed attempt at mating like this. She cools off to you dramatically... while you go crazy trying to get her back!

It's nuts. And it drives you nuts.

How can she be so cool toward you when the two of you were so close to intimacy?

In today's article we'll talk about a few tactics to attempt to turn things around in these sorts of situations. We'll also talk about why, from a strategic point of view, unless the girl is an absolute keeper, it's often better to take at best a few more shots, yet be ready to walk away.

Tactics Tuesdays: When Dates Don't Work Out, Do a Post-Mortem

Chase Amante's picture

dating post-mortem
When a date or an outing doesn't pan out, use a post-mortem to figure out why. Give yourself clear action items for next time – and recover your emotions, too.

Your dates and outings won't always work out.

Sometimes they don't pan out at all. You go out and approach girls and all you get are stony faces. You take girls onto dates yet can never get past the polite zone. You bring women home and hit a wall of last-minute resistance.

There is one thing you ought to always do, whenever things don't go your way.

That thing is a post-mortem.

The term comes from the Latin for after death, and it's pretty close to how we'll use it here.

After your date, outing, or seduction has 'died'... after the whole thing is over (and not before), you're going to do an 'after death' review to figure out what within your control went well, and what to change next time.

This is so incredibly important to your learning and future success. It takes your progress with women and puts it on the fast track -- and all it takes it a little cognizance of what you could've done better, and enough emotion control to step back and look at everything objectively.

Tactics Tuesdays: Smile, Eyebrows Up, Open Eyes

Chase Amante's picture

smile and attraction
It's basic, but it's also easy to forget to do. Smile when you approach a girl, and your odds of success with her go way up.

Sometimes the simplest stuff is the most important.

Every now and again, despite however many years at this, I will go out and discover things aren't going my way. Women don't glance at me or hover near me; when I approach them, they're lukewarm.

At first, whenever something like this happens, I assume it's randomness and asymmetry. Not everyone who sees you will like you; not everyone you talk with you'll connect with. Yet sometimes the pattern keeps up, well past the point you can chalk it all up as randomness. You meet more girls, talk to more girls, and they're still not as receptive as they should be.

Whenever this happens, I do a post-mortem on the outing. What did I do wrong? Where'd I screw up? I can usually find a few areas.

One of the most common, though, is also one of the most basic. All too often, I've been off in whatever kind of mood, and realize I haven't been smiling.

Tactics Tuesdays: Attainability for High Value Men

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

attainability for high value men
As a high value man, it's easy to seem out of girls' leagues. A focus on the High Value Man Big 5 for attainability keeps you in-reach for women you like.

Two days ago we talked about meeting women while staying safe in a paranoid dating society. The 'safety from vengeful women' adds just one more layer to the already thick binder of reasons you want to keep your attainability in the green zone.

Attainability is key to your success with women. If it's too low, women will auto-reject you. If it's too high, they won't be interested in you. There is an attainability 'sweet spot' you must operate inside of to do consistently well with women.

The subject of today's article is how to stay attainable when you're already a high value man. If you're the type of guy a girl might think is 'out of her league', attainability considerations become even more important for you -- because it's easy for you to blow it with women just by being your normal charming self.

Tactics Tuesdays: How to Deal with "You Need To..."

Chase Amante's picture

deal with you need to
You meet a girl, and she tells you "You need to dress better when you go out" or "You shouldn't talk to girls that way." Can this be salvaged – or is your goose cooked?

Sometimes you meet a girl who hits you with a demand, a critique, or an instruction.

Sometimes it's in a flirtatious way. Others it's with attitude (whether annoyed, or of the schoolmarm variety). Either way, the words of the thing will look like these:

  • "You need to start dressing better and not wear t-shirts so much."

  • "You shouldn't walk up to girls and make fun of them before you know them."

  • "You have to do something about the way you talk to people. It's too assertive."

  • "You should be more respectful about how you talk to women."

  • "You need to trim your beard. It's too long."

  • "You should stop wearing torn jeans. It's not fashionable anymore."

... and any of a variety of similar instructions or critiques.

Again, the tone can vary: sometimes she's flirty; sometimes she acts like an adult lecturing a clueless kid.

There are a variety of ways to respond to these critiques. Most of these ways aren't that great.

However, there are a few excellent ways to respond to these, that are pretty much always what you want to go for.

Tactics Tuesdays: Build Rapport and Trust with Contrasting and Listing

Daniel Adebayo's picture

contrasting and listing
You can throw a seduction into overdrive by building rapport and trust with your girl. To quickly build rapport and trust, use contrasting and listing.

Rapport is something I’ve touched on before. It’s that nice, warm feeling you get just by being around a close friend you share some commonalities with, or a workplace colleague you’d trust enough to share the more personal aspects of your life. It comes from being understood by another person, someone who can communicate with you in just the right way, the way you like.

Charismatic seducers – confident and attractive men who ooze warmth – tend to build immense amounts of rapport at breakneck speed with the women they meet and seduce. They know how to talk to girls in a way that makes them feel understood quickly, and with great communication skills, the rapport builds faster and deeper, until she starts feeling like she can trust them.

These men will meet attractive women via day game, night game, social circles, or pretty much any room they step into. They’ll be able to turn a causal, five-minute chat into a deep, fascinating baring of souls, an intimate conversation that can stretch out over long periods. They will often end up back at his or her place, getting even more intimate – this time in the physical sense.

As I mentioned in my previous article on rapport, the more rapport you can build, the more she will feel like she can trust you. Trust and rapport are directly correlated with one another.

The women I meet often tell me some of their deep, dark secrets and remark that they’re surprised they’re telling me this… before going ahead and telling me anyway.

I’ve had women share their sexual fantasies, as well as intimate thoughts and experiences they’ve had, things they aren’t even comfortable sharing with some of their female friends, most of the men they meet, and even their boyfriends. These are women I have met via cold approach. I made them trust me, and you can learn how to do it, too!

It’s a great ability to have. Think about it – if a woman you cold approach trusts you enough to share some deep, personal aspects of her life with you, she’s obviously going to trust you enough to give you her phone number. She'll trust you enough to meet up later for a date, and she’s not going to feel weird about going back to your place.

In my previous article, I shared some tips and techniques you can use to start building rapport in your day-game conversations with women. Think of that article as a primer. If you haven’t read it already, I’d recommend taking some time to go over it before continuing.

In this article, I’ll be sharing even more techniques you can use in day game or pretty much anywhere you might find an attractive woman worth talking to.

Tactics Tuesdays: Realigning a Girlfriend's Beliefs

Chase Amante's picture

realigning a girlfriend's beliefs
How do you change a girlfriend’s beliefs, and bring them inline with yours? By shifting her personal Overton window – to alter her ideological environment.

Commenting under a prior Tactics Tuesdays article on dismissing ideological fights you want no part of, Kaelos asked:

How about in a long-term relationship with a woman, where you share similar beliefs/views but there are some mild to moderate differences on topics like feminism, frugality vs spending, child-rearing practices, small differences in religious beliefs, etc.

Is there a strategy to implement so that her beliefs/views more closely match your own well-researched beliefs/views over the long term?

We’ve talked about behavior modification on Girls Chase plenty.

What about belief modification?

Well, yes. You can absolutely change someone’s beliefs... to an extent.

To do that, first, we’re going to focus on shifting a woman’s own personal Overton window.

Tactics Tuesdays: Imagine Games

Chase Amante's picture

imagine game
Fun personality games you can use with women you talk to, ‘imagine games’ increase a girl’s immersion and connection – when you use them right.

There’s a class of game or gambit we can call ‘imagine games’. An imagine game is when you ask a girl to imagine something, like that she is wealthy or can travel anywhere she wants to. You then spin her answer into a cold read, which escalates the courtship forward and makes her feel like you know her very well (thus establishing some similarity).

Imagine games are similar to, but different from, other games I’ve talked about on Girls Chase before, like:

These sorts of games (imagine games, and the games above) have the added advantage of creating a bubble with a girl, where she zeroes in on you and becomes intensely focused on you, and the outside world drops away, immersing her.

(the downside of this much immersion, this fast, is that it’s difficult to sustain for long, and if you don’t bring her out of it on your own terms, the spell breaks. So, just make sure you bring her back up to the surface on your own so she feels you’re in control and it never gets awkward – you can always re-immerse her later on)

We’re going to take a quick look at ‘imagine games’ – how they work, wrong ways to use them, and right ways to use them – below.

Tactics Tuesdays: 5 Mid-Pull Tips for Multiple Girls with a Wing

Chase Amante's picture

pull girls with a wingman
You and your wingman want to pull a couple of girls back home. Use these 5 tips to make sure the pull goes smooth and the girls come along.

Today’s Tactics Tuesdays is an assortment of five (5) little tactics to mind when you pull a couple girls with a wingman. These hold true whether it’s you and a buddy and you’ve pulled two girls together, or you and a buddy pull three girls, or you and three buddies pull two or three girls, or you and a buddy or buddies pull a group of guys and girls... all these tips hold regardless.

Before we begin, you may want to check Daniel’s article out, which is about inviting multiple girls home to after-parties. Though not required reading, this is generally the easiest way to invite multiple girls home at night (whom you meet in bars and clubs, or via nighttime street game) – just invite them to an after-party.

We won’t talk about the specifics of how to invite girls home in this article. You can learn more about those subjects in these articles:

This article focuses on the transition itself, mid-pull. You’ve gotten a few girls to agree to go somewhere private with you and a friend or two... now how do you keep things smooth and make sure your gals don’t decide to ditch?

Tactics Tuesdays: 5 Ways to 'Assume the Sale' with Girls

Chase Amante's picture

assume the sale dating
You know she likes you, but want to avoid resistance when you ask her to do something? Don’t give her the chance to resist. Assume the sale instead.

"Assume the sale."

It's one of the most recognizable sales mantras. Don't ask the prospect if he wants to buy. Assume he does. Then proceed under that assumption.

This advice has long made the rounds in seduction circles as well.

It's good advice, when timed well and calibrated to the girl and the scenario.

When you 'assume the sale' with an interested woman, you aren't jumping the gun heedlessly, of course. You don't assume "Well, she said 'hello' to me, so now I can take her hand and lead her to the washroom" (what you can do when she says 'hello' to you? Assume attraction). Rather than jump any guns, instead you read a girl's signs of interest and when you can tell she's probably ready for something, you just assume she is... and lead.

That's all well and good. If you don't have any sales training though, how do you do this?

Today's Tactics Tuesdays post arms you with five (5) different ways to assume the sale with women - all you have to do pick the method most suitable for your girl and your situation, and apply.