Showing Intent Without Showing Your Intentions

Hey guys, and welcome back.

I have been focusing on indirect game lately. I know many of you have enjoyed the series from the feedback I’ve received via PM on the forums. This always makes me grateful.

Others pointed out that the series has not included enough practical examples showing the execution of the techniques. I can’t write an A–Z guide detailing every step of how I run indirect game; that would require me to write a long book sharing all my game. However, I can share a report that exemplifies how I run this.

As usual, this series is becoming slightly longer than anticipated, but I’m the kind of guy who needs to cover every aspect before feeling comfortable moving on. I do the same with my students. I do not move onto their next sticking point to tackle until concepts are hammered down.

And this is what I intend to do with this series. I will try to keep things as fresh and exciting as possible.

Today’s subject relates to indirect game but more precisely, to the questions surrounding communicating and conveying your intentions to women.

Many proponents of direct game claim that communicating your intentions to a woman is key as it sets a “man meeting woman” frame, helping her know what the interaction is about and cutting the crap. It helps set a seduction frame. I see nothing wrong with this. It is obviously a good frame!

But if you have been paying attention to my series on indirect game, you may have heard me say:

• “Be indirect”

• “Don’t display your intentions”

• “Don’t communicate intent directly”

And these hold true, although there is a caveat.

This caveat is what I want to discuss today: showing your intentions is not necessarily bad. You can run indirect game and still display your intentions, and potentially reap all the benefits that follow:

• Screening

• Escalating the vibe faster

• Setting a good frame for seduction

It is a question of what intentions you convey and how. These nuances are what we will cover today in this post.

What type of intentions should you communicate? How should you communicate them? And ultimately, how does this fit into the broader view of indirect game (and what would differentiate it from a “direct game” variant)?

This post will serve as both a theoretical and practical guide. Let’s jump into it.

 

Indirect Game and Communicating Intentions

What truly defines indirect game and contrasts it to direct game?

With indirect game:

• You usually do not display any, or very little, interest in her until she has expressed some compliance toward you

• The level of interest you show more or less matches the level of interest she displays toward you

• You generally try to keep your level of interest in her somewhat ambiguous all the way to sex

On the other hand, with direct game:

• You are less responsive to her reaction toward you. You display interest in her and do not calibrate your displayed interest to her interest in you as much

• You initially display interest as a man to screen for receptive girls and escalate the vibe. I don’t believe this is a good strategy (Check here and here for my reasoning).

By showing interest, you display your intentions. I do not know many men who would approach a girl on the street or in a club, show interest in her, and have no desire to get to know her, date her, or just shag her. You imply your intentions because you display interest in a woman. She knows you want to get with her because you are showing interest.

As mentioned, displaying your intentions can bring a couple of benefits:

1. It speeds up the process. It sets a frame of “you two flirting” with a potential sexual undertone (if she accepts your moves and doesn’t reject you). This has been called the “man-to-woman” frame

2. She knows why you are talking to her. And she knows why she is talking back. This frame will facilitate the vibe’s escalation as you dodge beating around the bush and unnecessary fluff or small talk

But, what about indirect game? I seem to be contradicting myself. Showing too much interest or showing interest too early and not keeping your level of interest ambiguous is bad (check out my indirect game series), but showing your intent is good.

Is this yet another element of pick up and seduction where there are no clear answers, and it is all about picking your poison? Yes and no.

What if we can display our intentions to the girl and reap the benefits while keeping our level of interest ambiguous, like in indirect game?

 

Displaying Your Intentions without Displaying Interest

Can you display your intentions without showing interest? Or can you do so without revealing too much interest, so you have a chance to keep your overall interest level in the girl somewhat ambiguous to keep her curious and get her to chase you?

Yes, you can.

The main problem with direct game isn’t that you display your intentions, but that you display too much interest too quickly. But here, you get to do the former without doing the latter.

Before going further, I need to be clear: it’s possible to run proper indirect game without displaying your intentions. It can be a deadly strategy but is particularly suited to attention-seeking women who like to play “hard to get.”

However, in situations where you feel that the vibe is stagnating and you cannot escalate, feeling stuck, communicating your intentions may be the right call since it serves as a great tool to set a frame that allows you to escalate the vibe.

 

How To Communicate Your Intentions

So how do you communicate intentions without showing too much interest? I’ll describe a few scenarios to help you understand how it works. There are many ways to do this, so I will share those that I tend to favor (there are likely other ways, so this list is by no means exclusive).

Keep in mind that most strategies entail communicating your intentions indirectly. And I would usually not explicitly state them but rather communicate intentions implicitly. My interest in her is communicated indirectly. In other words, she deciphers this because of what I say. This should become clear once you have a look at the examples below.

I need to make one last point: showing intent can display some level of interest. Obviously, not as much as in pure direct game, but it is a slight display of interest in her. Remember that indirect game does not mean “not showing interest,” so show a little interest because displaying your intentions won’t do any harm.

At times you may find yourself communicating slightly too much interest too early. This is not the end of the world as you can always balance it out by using techniques that show disinterest like:

• Ignoring her

• Stop touching her

You will know you are showing too much interest if she starts:

• Testing you a lot

• Tooling you

• Playing hard to get

Next, we’ll discuss how to communicate your intentions.

 

Qualification

If you qualify a girl by talking about things you like in women, with the hope that she’ll bite, you are communicating that you are looking to mate.

For example:

Alek: You know, I think the best type of women are those who are so confident that they let go and liberate themselves and act according to their desires and passions. Are you such a woman?

Her: Yes. (She qualified, which is good! Reward her by escalating the vibe by, for example, touching her).

Alek: That’s awesome; you seem like an interesting girl. Tell me more about how it feels when you liberate yourself.

Or, if she says:

Her: No.

Then punish by seeming a bit cold.

Alek: Ah, that sucks. You seem cute! Sad that you don’t allow yourself to explore and enjoy the Earth’s greatest pleasures.

You can also make things very simple:

Alek: I like your vibe, but are you an adventurous person?

Her: Yes/No (If yes, her qualifying or being compliant means you need to reward her by escalating the vibe. If no, do the opposite).

Yes, you are showing some interest here, but you are not conveying that she has won you over (yet), and there is still some ambiguity about your level of interest.

There have been plenty of posts on Girls Chase about qualification, so check them out if you want to go deeper:

• How To Qualify A Girl And Ramp Up Attraction

• What Does She Want? 8 Things You Must Ask Her

• Is Qualifying Women Really That Important?

• What To Screen Women For

I have also written on sexual qualification if you want to add more juice.

 

Disqualification

Ironically, disqualification is also a way to show her that you intend to meet someone. By disqualifying her, you are somewhat communicating that you are challenging her. And for what reason? Because you are looking for a mate.

However, you have standards, which is sexy. You are disqualifying her whenever you feel she does not live up to them. Notice how this attitude’s frame of mind is one of you being the prize.

Alek: You seem cute. It’s a pity you seem a bit close-minded.

Her: What do you mean? (She is compliant! Reward her by explaining why you think she is close-minded and allow her to explain why she isn’t; allow her to qualify herself to you).

This suggests you intend to meet someone, or else you wouldn’t disqualify her. Are you showing plenty of interest? You could argue that “you are cute” is a mild sign of interest from me, but I am simply saying this to avoid pissing her off and/or facing auto-rejection. It’s a way to balance out the disqualifier. This technique is called Push/Pull.

But you can also use a disqualifier without using that light compliment:

Alek: You and I will never work out.

Her: Why would you say such a thing? (If she says something like that, consider it compliance, so escalate the vibe).

Be careful here: you are very prone to auto-rejections.

As you can see, you are clearly showing some intent since you wouldn’t say this if you weren’t at least considering hooking up with her. Yet, by the nature of the disqualifier, it looks as if you are not displaying any interest, or at least not much.

 

Sex Talk

I had to mention this since it’s my GO-TO way of showing my intentions without revealing too much interest. By talking about sex, I communicate that I am a sexual guy who wouldn’t mind hooking up, yet I do not express much interest in her. I talk about sex, but at no point do I communicate that I want to have sex with her. Instead, I just communicate that I like sex and that I am quite good at it.

For more information, check out this post.

 

Anything Goes

You can use any techniques you like or come up with ways or gambits that allow you to communicate your intentions without facing the pitfalls of direct game. I recommend you communicate your intent since it facilitates things.

The Golden Rule is to communicate that you are looking for a girl (with X properties; here, your standards come in), WITHOUT revealing that SHE is that girl.

One way of communicating your intentions is to convey your standards to a girl. I have written a piece on that, too.

The idea is to communicate your intentions without showing too much interest, and, if you do show your intent, find ways to counterbalance.

 

Recap

Today, we covered a caveat. Communicating or sub communicating your intent is useful. However, not in the way that is typically advocated by direct gamers when you display intent by showing tons of interest. Nor should you communicate that you want to get with HER unless she has:

• Demonstrated high levels of compliance (interest) in you

• Qualified (agreed) to your standards

Until then, you should communicate your intentions in a way that is more “general” and less “specific.”

We covered a few ways to do this:

1. Qualification

2. Disqualification

3. Sex talk

Communicating high levels of interest obviously shows your intentions. But you can communicate your intent without displaying too much interest. The latter is the key to proper and efficient indirect game.

Just like I have mentioned in the past in my other series, you want to use:

• Sexual tension

• Social proof

• Sex talk

It will help to end this series with a detailed report that details a clear example of how to execute indirect game masterfully. To those who’ve requested this, stay tuned for my next article.

Until then,

Alek