How to Attract Women (the Same Way Women Attract Men)

A few hours ago as I walked down a city street, a woman stepped out in front of me.

Her face and body were ordinary. But she triggered an involuntary response in me. My heart rate quickened. I felt excitement. I wanted to talk to this girl, and meet her.

I didn't talk to her. She finished crossing the sidewalk and entered the car waiting for her, with someone I guessed was a boyfriend.

And, truth be told, she wasn't really my type. Like I said, pretty average face and body.

Had I met her somewhere else though, I'd have likely talked to her and, if she bit, pursued her. Her walk was quick, confident, sexy. Her hair was a clear bottle blonde, and she'd clearly used a curler to add some wave. Her nose was too big, but her eyelashes were long and luxurious, and her lips were bright red, so I didn't stay focused on her nose long.

Her breasts were pert; though I've been with girls with breasts like hers where you take the girl's clothes off and discover those breasts are 90% bra. Her stomach was flat and her legs looked strong, so that was real, though there wasn't much to her butt. Even still, in her form-fitting yoga clothes, she looked good.

I passed through the perfume wake she trailed behind her as I continued my way down the street, and when I inhaled her sent my pulse quickened a second time.

And I thought to myself "That girl is far more ordinary, in her face and body, than plenty of more beautiful women I've seen already today. Yet, she excited me in a way none of those girls did."

What worked for her will work for you as well.

Because the secret of how to attract women is the same for men as what women use to have that effect on men.

And just like women like that can attract you and me with certain irresistible attraction signals (even if we know how they're doing it), you and I can do the same to women, too.

 

Some People Just Understand Attraction

Just like men, there are some women who focus on being respectable.

Then there are women who focus on being friendly.

Women who focus on being likeable.

And, just like with men, there are some women who focus on being attractive.

Being attractive is a kind of specialization, like being tough, or respectable, or friendly.

You can be more than one of those things. Many people are. Yet many more people only focus on one.

Some men focus on friendliness.

Some men focus on their careers.

Some men focus on sportiness, or handiness, or being knowledgeable.

Some men focus on being attractive. Men who decipher how to attract women and focus on that, and focus on being attractive, are just as attractive to women as those pulse-quickening women are to men.

Even if they aren't super good-looking.

Even if they aren't rich or tall or high status.

The things that give you that initial 'kick' of attraction -- that completely unconscious, uncontrollable kick, that members of the opposite sex are helpless to prevent -- are things we call 'fundamentals' on Girls Chase.

There are many such fundamentals you can focus on and tweak, and they all attract more women to you.

They include items like:

1. How you dress. Good men's fashion makes a huge impact on how attractive you are to women. Scientific studies have found women are more attracted to men wearing red. Women who are fertile (i.e., they can become pregnant) are especially attracted to red-adorned males. Other researchers have discovered women are more attracted to men dressed like authority figures, and that women are 3x more likely to say "yes" when a man who seems (doesn't necessarily have to be) high status asks them out. So, ditch the hoody and throw on a red button-down before you talk to girls.

2. How you walk. A sexy walk is (if you are a man), first and foremost, a powerful walk. Scientists from the University of Göttingen have found men and women both judge men with strong walks higher on strength and dominance then men with weak walks. The difference persists regardless whether the walker is actually physically strong or not. Women (but not men) also rate strong male walkers more attractive than weak male walkers. Men don't see an attractiveness difference in another man based on his walk... but women do.

3. The way you carry yourself. A man's posture makes a notable difference in how attractive he is to women. Scientists have found men with better posture are perceived as having more social power, more connectedness with whomever they're speaking to, and greater relaxation in the moment. Women rate men with straight shoulders and a sucked in gut as more attractive than men with slouched shoulders and protruding guts. Women are also much more likely to choose as mates those men who use expansive nonverbal posture that takes up more space. Good posture even improves your voice (one of our other fundamentals on this list). So many guys neglect their postures, yet the difference in attractiveness between a guy with outstanding posture and a guy with poor or average posture is vast.

4. Eye contact you make. Your eye contact flirtation attracts women and draws them in. Numerous scientific studies have established that people like others who make eye contact with them more. Men who hold eye contact longer are rated in multiple studies as "more potent" and "dominant", while people rate men who don't look at others as "nervous" and "unconfident." Researchers have even found that shared, mutual gazing between a man and a woman increases feelings of attraction. So you really should look her in the eyes.

5. How (and whether) you smile. Men often forget to smile. While smiling is less attractive in men than a more serious expression, it's necessary when you approach someone new to signal your intentions. Smiling causes a woman to rate a man as more trustworthy, enhancing his attractiveness as a potential long-term mate. Open-mouth smiles, according to research, add a playful motivation in (and playfulness is good for your courtships). When you approach a new woman, she has no way to be sure of your intentions; smiling is the single easiest way to put her at ease and have her put down her walls.

6. If your physique is non-fat. You don't have to be a gym rat to keep fat off. It's portion control that makes the biggest difference (see my simple guide to getting & staying slim). Researchers have found that men tend to rate their own attractiveness by looking at their upper body strength, and ignore their weight. Yet researchers also find women rate men of average physiques almost as attractive as men with muscular ones. It's the very thin men and the overweight men women rate less attractive. Not having a gut was also rated as one of the most major determinants of a man's physical attractiveness in a recent study of physiques. Build muscle if you can; but if you don't have the time or inclination for the gym, still, control your portions, and get to a healthy, attractive body type.

7. Whether you create proximity with other people. Close physical proximity raises attraction between two people, and it's another thing many men don't do enough. Many separate scientific investigations show that as a man brings a woman closer to him, or goes closer to her himself, she feels more attracted to him. If you want her more into you, get out of the polite zone and bring yourself up close.

8. What your voice sounds like. A man's voice has an enormous impact on how women perceive him, yet very few men work on theirs. Among other things, researchers have found a man's voice tells a woman: how dominant he is; how high or low status he is; and how much testosterone he has. And the right voice tone in a man can make a woman feel both relaxed around and intimate with him. Successful seducers even have a certain vocal sequence they progress through, starting out disarming and moving into seductive. Unsuccessful seducers use the same voice tone throughout their (unsuccessful) attempts at seduction.

9. The deliberateness of your movement. A man's movement matters. Studies show women rate men who move around more as more dominant and more attractive. Men who move slower appear to be more deliberate and intentional, and a man's movements even tell a woman how much of a risk-taker he is (and risk-taking is attractive).

10. How you hold your head. A man with his head held high, with his chin parallel to the ground, is significantly more attractive than the same man with his head held forward (chin lowered) -- 12% more attractive, in fact, according to a 2010 study by Boston University and the University of Tel Aviv. Imagine how big a difference an instant 12% boost to your attractiveness would be -- and you can do it right now by holding your chin parallel with the ground.

This is all stuff you can do.

Most of it is stuff you can do instantly.

All of it is stuff you can do consistently and unconsciously, once you've built the habit of doing it. On average, habits take 21 to 30 days of repetition to form. Get yourself to keep your shoulders straight or hold your head high for at least 21 days (3 weeks), and you'll do it automatically for the rest of your life after that.

Most men who try to figure out how to attract women 'figure out' the wrong stuff. They don't focus on the stuff that attracts women at a visceral, gut level -- that stuff we call 'fundamentals' here.

Instead they focus on things they can't change, or that are extremely hard or time-consuming to change.

But fretting about your genetic looks (which you have no control over) or the size of your bank account (which will likely take years to change) isn't the path to attracting the women you want.

Focusing on your fundamentals is.

 

"But the Media Told Me..."

Forget the media.

It's selling you stuff. (we are too, of course, but this isn't an ad)

It wants you to buy accessories that'll improve your status (supposedly)... or watch beautiful people living the lives you 'never can' as a form of escape. Meanwhile while you watch that stuff, it bombards you with advertising telling you what else to purchase and from whom to purchase it.

That girl who crossed my path didn't need anything more than some hair highlights, a bit of makeup, tight clothes, and a pushup bra, plus a good handle on her fundamentals, to haywire my ability to tell the difference between a genetically gifted woman and a woman who simply knows how to present herself.

You know how to attract a woman. Handle your fundamentals -- the stuff we just talked about -- and the effect you will create in women will be unconscious and automatic.

It doesn't matter what beliefs you've been programmed with.

Go grab ONE of these fundamentals, go walk around outside for 30 minutes, and put it on full display. Pay attention to how the people around you react. You will notice their reactions to you are different.

Your face isn't the first thing people notice about you. They can't see your bank account when you're walking on your street. Or your car. Or your social status.

What they look at, and where all the first impression of you comes from, is how you move. How much space you take up. How you carry yourself. Your posture. Whether you make eye contact, and if so how much. What you sound like when you speak. How you're dressed. Your physique. Your gait. The expression you wear. How physically close to them you are.

These are the immediate signals people pay attention to, the source of almost the entirety of their first pre-conversation impression of you. Other things can have an influence later, but just like me noticing that girl was only of average genetic looks with an only average body didn't influence the feeling I had about her, those things won't influence the feeling women have about you either.

Attraction is not a choice.

It is an unconscious activation of your attraction wiring.

You don't get to say "Well that person is ugly, I won't feel attraction" or "That person's too skinny, I won't be attracted."

If you're attracted, you're attracted, 'paper credentials' be damned.

 

How to Attract Women

Here is Step 1 in your "How to Attract Women" Lesson Plan:

• Pick one (1) fundamental from the list of 10 we just covered. Go out and use that fundamental, in its new and improved state, for 30 minutes. Observe how people react to you, and note the difference from usual.

Step 2 is, once you see the result, to keep doing it that way for the next 21 days, to form a new habit.

Then once you've done that, pick another fundamental, and go again.

(you can also work on 2 or 3 at a time... I wouldn't suggest more than 3 though, you'll lose track and won't be forming new habits. One step at a time; slow and steady wins the race)

In just a couple months you can make a huge, wild, and permanent difference in your own attractiveness to women.

This difference is an unconscious difference, that women cannot control.

A woman cannot control the fact that she finds men who hold their shoulders straight and their heads high more attractive than men who don't. It's programmed into her, she can't help it.

She cannot control the fact that she likes men without beer bellies more, and if that if you cut your portions down and lose yours she'll be more attracted to you.

She cannot control how she responds to a powerful male voice, or a man who creates close physical proximity with her, or a man who dresses well, smiles when he walks up, and moves deliberately. She can't control these things, because her responses are programmed in.

You can attract women if your fundamentals are strong.

You can make your fundamentals strong with a bit of work.

The attraction women feel for you when you do this is unconscious and automatic. And it makes everything you do with them easier.

There's no reason not to have good, attractive fundamentals, aside from ignorance or neglect.

These are things you can improve with a little bit of work (for the most part) and which, once improved, it takes minimal maintenance from you to keep up.

So, pick one, today, and start to work on it.

Go try it out. See how people react.

And notice how you attract women to you, more and more.

Yours,
Chase