(2) Intermediate

... no, I'm not going to suggest that you dodge the dangers of sex and the dangers of dating by dodging sex and dating. That's a little too extreme - I'll leave the abstinence education to the religious institutions.

But if you're active sexually and you're active in the dating world these days, you're probably meeting, dating, and getting together with a fair number of different women. And like anything where you're inviting people into a level of intimacy and closeness to you, you need to be very careful of the dangers that can come with that, too.

It isn't all just good times and happy memories. If you're not paying attention, you can literally open yourself up to all kinds of problems from sex and dating... and not just the ones you hear about in high school, either.

Therefore, today, we're taking a momentary break from giving you tips and techniques on how to get the girls you really like, and instead bringing you this public service announcement - to make sure that when you get those girls, you'll be well-prepared to enjoy your time with them to the fullest - and not have to worry about getting taken to the cleaners or something else you don't want to have happen.

Let's dive in.

In the vein of my last post - 15 lessons on getting girls - this post is focused on short, simple tips you can learn from and implement right away to make you better able to sleep with girls you like.

If you've been at actively meeting new women for a while, you're probably already familiar with or doing some of these... but even if so, I'm guessing there're a few new tidbits in here for you that you haven't heard elsewhere before.

And if you're new to meeting, approaching, and seducing new women, then this post is going to be great for getting you out of the starting gate... with a bang.

Without further ado...

One of the best ways to get good at anything is to simply practice it… A LOT (see: How to Seduce Women Like the All-Time Greats). This works *particularly* well when it comes to meeting, dating and seducing beautiful women.

Why?

Because there are really only so many things that can happen on a date, and there are only so many things a girl could say in any given situation… and after you’ve dated a couple of hundred women, you’ve seen them all before.

And then you can predict what’s going to happen… and you already know the best response, if she says yes, if she says no, or no matter what she says or does, because you’ve been in that situation a million times before.

You already know what worked in the past… and what didn’t.

You’ll become more refined, more experienced… dare I say, more rehearsed?

And I don’t mean more rehearsed in a bad way… I’m not talking about reciting memorized lines (even though, contrary to popular myth, those really do work – if they’re really good! The cheesy lines you’ll find if you do a quick Google search or if you pick up a men’s magazine won’t do the trick).

I mean rehearsed more in the sense of a Kung Fu master, who has been in so many fights that he has seen any move an opponent could make over and over again… and he has a block up his sleeve to defend against each one of them.

Not that dating is at all adversarial… I can absolutely guarantee you that your results will double overnight if you can really start looking at girls as teammates who want the same thing you do.

But she *will* throw you curve balls, if only to test whether you have this attitude, to see whether you have the psychological strength she looks for in a man, and whether you are a high value man with many options.

Commenting on the post on building social status, a reader asks the following about how to be a warm person:

“Hi Chase, great site, great article. Could you discuss more about warmth? You discuss it quite often, but you could dive into this topic more in-depth? It's a powerful tool to use in all aspects of life, so your breakdown of this would be much appreciated!

Thanks”

Happy to oblige, Anonymous.

Back in 2001, a young female customer walked back into the tire store where I worked as a technician and salesman to complete a transaction she'd begun the day before with me. I wasn't there, so another salesman helped her. "That guy who helped me yesterday was nice," she told him, referring to me, "but I felt like he had bad intentions."

When this salesman told me she'd said this, I was surprised; I knew I'd adopted an edge over the past few years - it had been designed specifically to make sure no one would want to fight me, since I was always alone and frequently in dangerous situations. But I didn't think it was actually scaring off women.

I went to work trying to change it, but even a year later, friends on my college dorm room floor told me, "The girls on the 7th floor said, 'That kid with the red hair is scary.'"

When I heard this, the first thing I thought was, "All right. I've adjusted my face for men - to be intimidating and frightening - long enough. It's time I adapt myself for women instead."

Within a few years, I was regularly hearing things like the following:

"I only just met Chase, but I felt like we'd been friends for ages."

"It's so great hanging out with you; I feel like I can tell you anything."

"Spending time talking to you makes me feel like I can breathe."

How I figured out how to be a warm person and how I made the switch to that from "scary and intimidating" is what I'll detail in this post.

Note from Chase: this is the final post in our 5-part series on How to Pick Up Girls: The Success Factor. Check out Part I, Part II, Part III, and Part IV before reading this post, if you haven't already. In this last post in the series, Ricardus discusses how to take everything you've learned in the last four installments... and apply it to cleaning up in seduction.

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By now, you’re starting to get a pretty clear idea of how we can control our own emotions… completely internally, without having to rely on alcohol, “warm-up sets” or having company around.

Two questions remain: What kinds of states should you put yourself into… and how can you transfer these states to other people?

The truth is there are several different states that can work well to meet and attract women… different things work for different people. What’s always going to work best to attract feminine women, however, is the masculine vibe of a sexual man.

Something that every nice guy has painfully experienced - one way or the other - is that when you don't challenge women, you also don't attract women. Challenge is a necessary, integral part of building and maintaining respect and desire for you in women.

But what is challenge? It's easy to understand why most guys get this wrong. It's hard to pin the concept of "being a challenge to women" down when you're not sure where the line is. What if you challenge her too much and lose her? And while this does happen - it's called auto-rejection, and it happens more than most men realize - if you're hitting women's no-challenge flags too often, you need to get that one fixed first before you start worrying too much about whether you're going too far.

Can't fix the problem of going too far if you usually don't go far enough in the first place... right?

You need to train yourself, if you don't do it already, to challenge girls.

Note from Chase: this is Part IV in our series on How to Pick Up Girls: The Success Factor. Be sure to read Part I, Part II, and Part III first before reading this post, if you haven't already.

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Anyway, that's the science side of state control.

Now you may think, well – these are great ideas, but is it really possible to control your state of mind at every moment? After all, we think tens of thousands of thoughts per day.

Actually, you really only need to put yourself into the state you want when you start any activity… whatever state will be the most resourceful one for that specific task.

If you can then get into the activity and get positive feedback from it, the state will reinforce itself. If it does drop, you simply notice the change in your emotional state and repeat the focus exercise… and correct your physiology along with it.

Keep doing it.