(1) Beginner

Guys who are not getting laid are so due to “safety.” They don’t do the three things guys who do get laid do, and they pay the price for it in sexlessness.

When a guy is not getting laid, it is almost always for the same reason:

He is playing it too safe with girls.

I don’t mean “safe” as in “avoiding sketchy situations with girls bristling with red flags.”

Sure, red flag girls might be easier, but that’s not the kind of “success” you want.

Instead I mean “safe” as in he is doing things to protect his ego and avoid work that might not pay off instantly, the cost of this being that he continues to not get laid with girls.

So long as he continues playing things this kind of “safe”, he will remain stuck in a dry spell, going nowhere with girls, and not getting laid.

The only way out of it (aside from Lady Luck taking pity on him and throwing him a freebie one day) is to stop playing it so safe… and begin taking the kind of risks that bring girls into one’s life and bed.

Have you ever wanted to see what it looks like for a student to get coached live, in-field, to do better with girls he approaches on the street?

Well believe it or not I had a super gracious student of mine who allowed me to record and share one of our coaching sessions where he went live into the field to make approaches and take me with him.

Girls put guys in some tricky situations. Is there a way to always know how to act the right way with a girl? There is… and it’s not as hard as you’d think.

Have you ever known a guy who was ultra-smooth, and seemed to somehow always know the right thing to do with a girl?

Ever wish you had a way to be like that guy, and always know how to act the right way with girls yourself?

Believe it or not, the secret that ultra-smooth guy has access to has nothing to do with his personality or his upbringing.

He doesn’t have any special powers inaccessible to other men.

He’s actually doing something that any guy can learn to do.

He probably never even set out to learn how to do it.

But you can.

You can specifically TARGET this ability, and deliberately seek to become a guy who always know how to act the right way with a girl.

All it takes it is a bit of a...

shift!

The male-to-female sex ratio has a big impact on how people behave in nightlife. A favorable ratio can help you pick up girls… but a bad one can block you.

Hey guys. Welcome back.

Today I want to talk about social dynamics and sex ratios.

There’s no doubt that social dynamics play a crucial role in night game while at clubs, bars, and parties, and this post also applies to social circle game, including social gatherings and private parties. Seduction occurs in social settings, so they both have that in common.

Anyone active in pickup and seduction needs social skills and a good understanding of social settings because women like socially savvy men. In my last article, I made the case that even day gamers should go to social gatherings to focus on social dynamics, so check out that post. (And if you are a beginner, you should.)

Let’s discuss a factor in both night game and social settings that determine the difficulty level so much that this simple factor can break or make your night.

That factor is the ratio, to be more precise, the male-to-female ratio in your pickup setting. You may already have a good idea about what we are about to discuss, and you likely have some knowledge about how the male-to-female ratio can affect your outing.

Nevertheless, it’s an overlooked factor that we have not discussed much. And if you are a seasoned reader, you know how we operate: we will go in-depth on how the male-to-female ratio affects social dynamics. So, this will be a theoretical but important post. Next week we will get more practical and cover different solutions to unfavorable ratios.

Why do girls flirt in some places but not others? Why will they flirt with some men but not others? It has as much to do with safety as it does attraction.

How do you get a girl to flirt with you?

For starters, make it feel safe for her to.

There are various ways women may feel like flirting with you is safe – ranging from because they believe there’s nothing that “can happen” to because they believe that anything that could happen would be positive.

Let’s take a quick look at what this means – how and why girls judge it “safe to flirt” – and how to use this to create meaningful flirtations that lead your seductions forward toward consummation.

If you’re talking to a girl when someone interjects with poor opinions on your flirtation, that’s a busybody cockblock – and you have to get rid of him.

Everybody’s a critic, amirite?

Over on the forum, a member reported an issue where he was flirting with a girl who was “way into him” when suddenly a person near to both of them interjected to announce that our member was “too old” to be flirting with the girl he was flirting with.

The forum member wasn’t sure what to do. His first idea was

Essentially, take ownership by saying I am flirting, and joking about being old and creepy like Craig Ferguson, or something?

No. No you definitely do not want to do that.

Craig Ferguson is definitely good at being chasey and creepy with women. But if you are painting yourself as “just a chasey, creepy guy, just like Craig Ferguson!” all that is doing is yielding the frame to the cockblock, empowering him to cockblock further, all while making yourself feel creepy, and creeping out the girl.

The last thing you want to do when someone tries to cockblock you is agree with the frame of your cockblocker and give that person encouragement to continue.

Instead, you need to take the frame away from this person – and obliterate his frame so hard he never tries to interfere with your seductions again.

CAPTION

On my article about teasing a move you’ll make on a girl before you actually make it, Proximus asked

Hey Chase,

Could you write an article on escalating proximity with a girl in all kinds of situations with examples etc?

Sure, I can do that.

Closing proximity with a girl is when you get yourself and a girl physically closer. This is more or less mandatory to your courtships because it lets you touch women more naturally. Since touch is vital to romance, you want as much proximity as you can get – while making it as natural (and non-overbearing) as can be.

(by the way, in case you DON’T think proximity with girls is important, here’s a study finding close proximity makes someone seem more interested and dominant, both of which are attractive to women in a courtship; here’s a study reporting when men got closer to women, women rated them more positively; here’s a study finding as opposite sex pairs get closer, attraction increases; and here’s a study that finds people with close proximity feel more tightly involved with each other. And that’s just for starters)

All that said, let’s jump into our 12 ways to get into close proximity with a girl you like!