Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

Sleazy Sex Talk vs. Sexy Sex Talk: What’s the Difference?

Alek Rolstad's picture

Hi everyone. I hope you are all doing well. This post will be answering similar questions to last week’s post – discussing calibration and sexual escalation. Today however we will be more focused on sex talk.

sleazy sex talk

Before I begin, let me repost a relevant question from one of our readers “Anonymous”:

I was thinking, what’s the difference between the sleazy guys who talks about sex, using sexual frames and escalation vs. sexy guy who talks about sex, using sexual frames and escalation? And I read your sequence in “Physical Escalation in Public”;What happens when we escalate at the wrong sequence (too much)? thanksalek ;)

Last time we discussed calibration and escalation. Some of the questions answered last time were:

  • When should one start to escalate

  • How can one escalate without triggering huge amounts of resistance

  • Tips and tricks to avoid resistance

  • How to calibrate your escalation

Now last time we discussed “escalation” in general without focusing too much on whether we were talking about verbal or physical (non-verbal) game, because the concepts discussed in the last post were applicable to both.

Anything discussed in the previous post is valid for verbal seduction (sex talk) and hence can work as a great foundation for what I am about to discuss here. Today however we will focus on calibrating sexual verbals, and learn how to avoid triggering resistance while doing so.

4 Hours of Downtime Tonight While We Upgrade Site

Chase Amante's picture

Hey there,

Just a quick update that GirlsChase.com will be down from about 1 AM EST to 5 AM EST this evening while we upgrade the website architecture.

This should not affect how you use the site, and any changes you see to GC should be minimal.

If you're online at this time and need your fix, the forum will still be open.

Cheers,
Chase

What Backward Rationalization is, and How It Affects You with Girls

Chase Amante's picture

There’s a little-discussed concept in seduction called “backward rationalization”, where someone attributes reasons for a choice or action after-the-fact, rather than before it.

A simple example is you bring a girl home after a date and escalate on her, nearly to the point of sex. If you then have sex, there’s a good chance afterward she looks back and says, “Well, we had sex because he was attractive / charming / had a good body / etc.”

backward rationalization

If on the other hand you do not have sex, there’s a fair chance she looks back after and says, “Well, we didn’t have sex because I wasn’t really that into him.”

In both cases, it may have simply been that you pushed a little harder to get past last minute resistance in the first scenario, and in the second you got winded and gave up. But the narrative she retains about why you slept together or didn’t is completely different.

Backward rationalization can mean the difference between her thinking you’re great or her thinking you’re not... all due to the outcome you achieve with her.

Can You Beat the Bad Boy and Get the Girl?

Chase Amante's picture

beat bad boyA reader named Tom wrote in a short while back with the following question:

Can you do an article of what a man should do when he has to compete with a badboy to attract a woman?
Many thanks for reading.

Well, that’s an interesting one.

Especially considering so much of the content on Girls Chase is aimed at turning you into the bad boy.

But what happens when you’re head-to-head with a badder boy than you?

Escalating on Her in a Controlled & Calibrated Way

Alek Rolstad's picture

Howdy all,

Today I decided to take the time to answer a question related to escalation (being physical or verbal), and more in particular about calibration – calibrating escalation to the girl and the situation.

escalate on her

In other words, the readers were curious how one can escalate while limiting their chances of facing resistance.

Many students of seduction struggle when it comes to escalation, because they lack calibration and can easily blow things off if they do things wrong. Now, being perfectly calibrated is impossible, but great calibration skills come from experience.

However, in this post I will give you some tools that will make things easier for you.

Now onto the questions:

A reader who posted as Anonymous asked the following:

I was thinking, what’s the difference between sleazy guy who talks about sex, using sexual frames, and escalating vs. sexy guy who talks about sex, using sexual frames and escalating.

And I read your sequence in “Physical escalation in Public” What happens when we escalate at the wrong sequence (too much)? thanks alek ;)

In addition, Lawliet asked this:

Nice article bro!

Anonymous said something interesting. Got me thinking.

Just wondering what happens when we escalate too much too early or in the wrong order and what we can do to recover afterwards?

Best regards,

Lawliet

Both are very good questions and as they are both more or less related I decided to answer them in detail in this post.

4 Tension Locks to Use When You Talk to Girls

Chase Amante's picture

If you ever watch good verbal movie seductions – like, say, one featuring Sean Connery or George Clooney – you’ll notice there’s often a moment when the male suddenly cuts all the cute stuff, leans in, and says something that locks the tension in and dials it up through the roof.

This is usually the moment of the seduction when you smile to yourself and say, “Wow, he’s good.”

tension lock

Sometimes when one of these men do this, the woman in question is going off on a tangent, or rambling, or even panicking.

And then he just hushes her up, leans in, drops a little word bomb on her, and the tension goes through the roof.

If they’re somewhere private, they may start kissing... then disrobing. If they’re in public, the tension might be thick enough to chop with a meat cleaver (and the man will follow it up either by lightening the mood a bit to avoid cresting emotions too high and causing the spell to break... or by pulling her somewhere private, if it’s an option).

For the sake of discussing this technique more easily, I’m going to call the phrases the male uses ‘tension locks’; there are four (4) of them, they can be really effective, and best of all, you needn’t be a movie star or a master seducer to use them.

You just need to know what they are, and when to put them into play.

How to Be a Freak in Bed, Pt. 5: Taboo as Aphrodisiac

Hector Castillo's picture

Now that we have thoroughly explored the Temple of Debauchery, we can clearly understand some of the why’s and how’s of these darkly beautiful acts.

But as a reminder, here are the first four articles of the series:

  1. How to Be a Freak in Bed, Pt. 1: All Women are Freaks
  2. How to Be a Freak in Bed, Pt. 2: Beginners Guide
  3. How to Be a Freak in Bed, Pt. 3: A Little More Kinky
  4. How to Be a Freak in Bed, Pt. 4: Shagging Like a Pornstar

At the end of the most recent article, I suggested that while sexual creativity is infinite, there are some limits to what you should do with women. But first, some of you might be asking a very reasonable question:

“Will every girl do ‘X’?”

taboo

If the man (or men) is sexy enough and if non-judgment and discretion are assured, then, yes, girls will do just about everything.

Why?

Be More Flexible, Sleep with More Girls

Chase Amante's picture

flexible sleep with girlsIn the comment section of my article “10 Surprising Reasons Women Will Have Sex with You”, a reader remarked on a study on luck that discovered exceptionally “lucky” people basically are much better at noticing and seizing on opportunities, while “unlucky” people are more single-minded and stubborn, and miss opportunities.

Our reader commented that:

I totally coroborate it with my incident today. There is this cute girl in my neighbouring room in student dorm I had been planning to talk to for days. I thought over it for days and planned a silly excuse to go talk to her only to realise that she had been sick. Instead of adapting quickly and offering her to drop by place for some warm tea i completely flipped and just went through what i had planned in my mind before, Just like the article i missed the opportunity for a spontaneous casual conversational connection based on my planned mindset. think this is what most people nervous with girls and new to it suffer, presence of mind and adaptablity. Not always but specific to situation they are not comfortable with. Your views on this !

And... yes. This hits the nail on the head all kinds of ways.

You know, one of the most common attributes nearly all inexperienced guys have in common is they’re stubborn. You tell them to do something, and they won’t do it because they’ve already put themselves on a certain path and they don’t want to get off it. Or they want to finish this thing they’re working on.

And that’s a good habit to have (focus; follow-through). And I’m that way to a large extent myself, or was originally (now I’m more diversified: focused in where focused in is useful, big picture where that’s more useful), so I do relate.

But if you want to do better with girls, and if you want to sleep with more girls, a big part of that is going to come from learning to be flexible, and recognize the opportunities you’ve been letting slip by you wholly unrecognized.

What the Romance Novel Tells Us Women Want

Ethan Fierre's picture

romance novelIn 2013, women purchased over $800 million worth of romance novels.

They’re not doing that because their desires for erotic stimulation are fully sated by their real-life encounters; they’re doing that because they are STARVED for it.

Whether she’s 15 or 55, a woman loves the thought of being swept up with a Rochester or a Romeo. Yet, as she ages, and life repeatedly denies her this, her faith in ever experiencing such a romance wanes, and she retreats further into a world of make-believe, out-of-reach eroticism.

The success of the romance novel directly reflects this general discontent women have with men in the Anglosphere; its popularity implies that women largely are surrounded by men who are not satisfying them on an emotional level… let alone a physical one.

Because of this, if you can teach yourself to be a man who CAN provide erotic stimulation IN REAL LIFE, your relationships will shine with mutual satisfaction.

Sound like a tall order? Perhaps it is. Luckily, there is a cheat-sheet out there that makes manifesting this reality a little easier:

Romance novels.

What to Do to Not be the Cold Playboy Everyone Hates

Cody Lyans's picture

By: Cody Lyans

Ever sleep with a new girl, only to end up feeling empty inside once all is said and done?

Ever struggle with seeing yourself as a victim, blaming the world for not giving you what it owes you?

Ever start taking successes and failures far too personally, and letting them mess with and control your emotions?

Ever let your own false sense of superiority lead you to treat other people in ways you later wish you hadn’t?

Sometimes it feels like you might never win. Everyone seems to have their game together except you. You feel like you are always trying to “catch up”. It eats away at you subconsciously until you seek the lows you are used to. You rationalize away fleeting successes. You feel overwhelmed and, worst of all, you aren’t sure you enjoyed it all that much.

cold playboy

Recently I have been afforded a window of opportunity to study this feeling in myself again. It has been a long time since I have felt like this with women, but now as I reflect upon it I think it is a topic worthy of getting into for you guys.