Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

Girls Who Want to Sleep with You Usually Know It Right Away

girls know right away
When you walk up, and she looks up at you, she knows if she could go to bed with you later. What comes after is simply leading her there, and making her feel allowed to go.

There are two schools of thought when it comes to sex.

One school of thought is what you might call the 'normal guy school'. In this school, a woman will not go to bed with you until you have 'gotten her ready'. The ways a normal guy tries to make a woman want him / tries to 'get her ready' include:

  • Spending time with her
  • Connecting enough with her
  • Making her laugh
  • Showing her whom he is
  • Displaying valuable things about himself
  • Communicating to her she 'qualifies' for him

Once she has seen enough of the guy's good qualities, goes this school of thought, she will then open up to the idea of sex.

The other school of thought though is what we might call the 'lover school'. In this school, if a woman is going to go to bed with you, she knows it the moment you approach. You still will end up doing things like:

  • Spending time with her
  • Connecting enough with her
  • Making her laugh
  • Showing her whom you are
  • Displaying valuable things about yourself
  • Communicating to her she 'qualifies' for you

However, these actions serve the purpose of moving things along and getting her comfortable enough to let her guard down with you. They are not to 'make her want you'... not really.

Because she already wanted you. You're just trying to help her feel like it's okay to give into what she wants.

Although the actions are superficially the same, the intentions behind these actions are dramatically different between these two men. These intentions drive differences in how the man carries out these actions, how much of them he feels he needs, and how fast with women he thinks he can move.

The more you think like the men in the second school of thought (the lover school), the more natural, easy, and fluid you will find getting together with new women becomes.

2 Strategies for Making a Move on a Girl

get laid make a move
You should never wait for a girl to make a move toward sex. That’s your job. These two move-making strategies will help you get the job done in most situations.

Should I pull the trigger? Should I make a move?

It’s a hard question. A question anyone in the field asks themselves often about girls – particularly if the girl is cute and the interaction seems to be going the right way.

So, what do I mean by pulling the trigger? It is making a direct move to push the interaction toward intimacy and sex. That big step depends on the situation, the girl, and you.

Making a move could mean:

No matter which one you are dealing with, it can be the gateway to the next level in your interaction.

If you fail to make a move, you will likely not get the girl. Reread this, because it is important:

“If you do not make a move, you will not get the girl.”

If you don’t make a move, three things will happen:

  • If you are lucky, the interaction goes stale – not forward but at least not backward

  • If you are unlucky, she will get bored or think you are weak and lose attraction for you

  • If you are very unlucky, she will bail and hook up with another guy. If your night truly is crap, she will do it in front of your face. But if it makes you feel any better, let me tell you that this happens to all of us

Now let's get to the finer points.

How Self-Esteem Issues Make Women Back Out of Sex

self-esteem and sex
Women get self-conscious about their bodies and pussies, which is why you need to make her feel comfortable, or her insecurities can force her out of the situation.

We are in Part 3 of our exploration of sex and female self-esteem.

In Part 1, I described two examples of the seduction falling apart in the last moments of courtship – right as sex was about to happen and the girl was excited and expecting it.

In Part 2, we discussed different ways that self-esteem issues can pop up before a guy invites a girl home.

Now in Part 3, we’ll look closely at what happens in the bedroom – the most vulnerable moment for a woman’s self-esteem.

A guy should be aware of a girl’s self-esteem throughout any scenario with her – especially in the bedroom. In a dating situation, the self-esteem issue is more convoluted because it’s easy to misunderstand the difference between your game versus the girl’s self-esteem, and it's hard to know when and how to make moves.

Sometimes your best intentions to influence a girl’s self-esteem positively can backfire and send the opposite message, making her self-esteem drop in response.

9 Ways to Make the Missionary Position Explosively Good

missionary sex position
The missionary position has a reputation of being ‘boring’ when in fact it's the most ‘intimate’ sex position there is. To make it explosively orgasmic, use these tips.

Ah, the missionary position. The granddaddy of all bangin’ styles. Old Betsy, the reliable.

It doesn’t get the fame and love of other positions like doggy style, 69, the fire hydrant, or the twin dragon meets rabid butterfly technique (banned in the UK).

It may seem vanilla at first glance, just laying on top of a girl and thrusting – boooooring!

But I assure you, there are many ways to make missionary style mindblowing for both you and your partner.

How Abstraction Can Help You Connect Better with Women

abstraction and women
Women can seem hopelessly complicated, but if you check off some basic ideas, you’ll display enough understanding to allow them to bring their walls down for you.

When you learn how to drive a car, you don’t need to know how to put the engine together or memorize the available horsepower at particular RPMs. You don't need to know how the cylinders are operating, or understand the function of the pistons – you just drive.

This is abstraction, the general concept that applies to things of the same nature, or in this example, of how similar machines with four wheels generally operate.

You use abstraction every day in the real world, without even realizing it. This same concept pertains to women and pickup. I’m not saying women are as simple as cars, that’s far from the point, but what I am trying to help you understand is this: there are general rules that are basic to interacting with women that apply to all women. From dating to screwing, there are core rules that can give you better results and get you further in your mission of acquiring pussy or just having women around.

We will use the concept of abstraction to take a relatively complex system like women and try to simplify our efforts to interact sexually with these beautiful creatures.

So how exactly can we apply abstraction to women?

Tactics Tuesdays: Zero Small Talk Flirtation

zero small talk
Don’t get stuck in boring go-nowhere conversations with girls. Ditch the small talk, and flirt with ‘small talk zero’ instead.

This is for any guy who runs into this issue:

You're in a situation, start to talk to a girl, make small talk about the setting/situation, then get trapped in a platonic conversation where you talk about boring situational things that neither you nor the girl care about. She loses interest and slips away.

If this happens to you, there's an easy tactic you can use, and that is to go 'small talk zero'. Instead of make small talk, your entire early conversation consists of flirtatious banter.

Sometimes you can make small talk work perfectly fine, especially if you are confident in how you do it and don't spend too long on it. However, if you're nervous, or don't feel in control of the situation, it's easy to fall into a small talk loop, where small talk leads to more small talk, which leads to boredom, and women leaving.

Since we don't want attractive women leaving, instead of getting trapped in an endless small talk loop, we can use 'zero small talk' flirtation instead.

4 Ways to Use the Contrast Principle in Your Love Life

contrast principle
The contrast principle allows you to guide people to the choice you want them to make with the use of a powerful psychological feature: contrast.

On my article about fun ways to use reverse psychology, a reader named 'America's Ass' asks:

Hey Chase, I loved this article! Would you mind doing one on the "contrast principle". It seems to be a great tool in fields like sales, negotiation and persuasion in general. Looking forward to your wisdom on how one could use this in a courtship scenario. Aufwiedersehen!

What is the contrast principle America's Ass is referring to?

It is the idea we do not judge things in absolutes.

Rather, we contrast one thing against something else.

When you say "This pastry is delicious," you really mean "This pastry is delicious contrasted against other pastries I've had." When you say "That person is a jerk," you really mean "That person is a jerk contrasted against the other people around me usually."

There are many ways you can see the contrast principle in life:

  • The Hot Girl (Guy) in the Room Effect: everyone's been stuck in a classroom or office space where another person present is the most attractive around. Maybe you developed a big crush on this person over a few weeks or months. But when one day you saw this person outside class/the office, out in the real world, next to all the other people in public, suddenly that person was rather plain. How did this individual look so good in class or the office, yet so plain in public? Because, contrasted against your (few... or zero) other romantic options in the classroom/office, this person was the best, and the contrast principle inflated her (or his) attractiveness. Out in the real world, where there are many more options to choose from, some of them much more attractive than the classroom/office hottie, this person becomes pretty plain in contrast.

  • Fruit Sweetness. If you eat a lot of cakes, cookies, candies, soda, and ice cream, when you bite into a fruit, it's not that sweet, and it may not be that enjoyable or rewarding. The reason why is because fruits use sugar to make themselves yummier. But cakes, cookies, candies, soda, and ice cream have far more sugar packed into them than fruit does, and if you regularly eat them, it will seem like the sugar content of fruit is not that high in contrast. Yet, if you take a break from confections, and cut the cakes, cookies, candies, soda, and ice cream out of your diet, within a month or so fruits begin to seem much sweeter, and become an enjoyable dessert to have after a meal. Because you no longer contrast them against foods much sweeter than them, fruits now seem like the sweetest thing in the world to you.

  • Good vs. Bad Interviewees. If a job interviewer interviews a candidate who seems like a bad candidate for the role, the next candidate the interviewer speaks with (unless that candidate is even worse) will seem better than he otherwise would have in contrast. On the other hand, if the interviewer interviews a great candidate who really blows his socks off, the next candidate, even if that candidate is objectively pretty good, will seem much worse in contrast (unless the candidate is actually better than the first one). This works the same way on the interviewee side when interviewing for jobs. Interview with a place that leaves you saying "I would never want to work there!" and the next place will seem like the Promised Land in contrast. However, interview with a place where you conclude you would definitely like to work, and the next company you interview at will seem like a much bigger disappointment than it would've seemed had you interviewed at it first.

The two examples we just covered with people are somewhat outside your control (the fruit sweetness example, however, is 100% within your control). You can't completely control whether you are the most attractive member of your sex in a given room (though you can dress better, improve your posture, and do other things to make you a more attractive option). And you can't control how good or bad the interviewee is before you (though you can make yourself as good an interviewee as possible, to hopefully stand out in positive contrast to whomever came before).

So below, I'll give you a handful of ways you can use the contrast principle to actively influence the way other people see you... and, in turn, influence the results you get, both socially and romantically.

How to Kiss a Girl Like a Boss (Video)

How to kiss a girl properly?

This is one of the most important skills you will ever learn. Ever.

A kiss will tell a girl EVERYTHING about you. Your desire for her. Your connection with her. And whether you have ever done this before.

It can completely sell her on you. Or it can make her want a refund.

That’s why I’m here. To make sure that when you do kiss that girl you like, she’ll need a fresh pair of panties (and want to take them off ASAP so she can get more of you... and by that I mean, your dick).

Let’s get to it.

Why You Can Get Hotter Women with Same-Day Lays

same-day lays
Your best chance to have sex with a girl is on the day you first meet. Going for same-day lays will net you a better meet-to-lay ratio and even get you hotter girls.

Hey, guys. Today I have a follow-up to my post about the typical ways most guys meet girls (online and social circle). My conclusion was that men are usually shooting themselves in the foot by picking such strategies.

I will share an opinion that is likely not discussed much on the web and list several reasons why same-day lays can (1) get you laid more consistently, and (2) score you hotter chicks.

The reason we don’t see this discussed much could be that same-day lays may be looked down on by moralist forces. Women do not want to talk positively about it, as they take pride in “never having slept with a guy on a first date” (which is usually bull crap). Men, in the last ten years, have become more moralist than ever.

From my time on pickup forums, I have seen a decline in not only same-day lay reports, but also noticed that discussions seem to focus more on dates and second meetups. Why has the interest in pulling the girl right away declined? It is an interesting sociological question worth investigating.

But examining that trend is not my task for today. My task is to give you reasons why I believe same-day lays to be superior (in my opinion) than dates, or second and third meetups. By second meetups, I am referring to having sex with a girl the second time you see her, just to make it clear.

When I look at my own lay statistics, I've had much more success going for same-day lays than grabbing numbers and meeting girls later. I have had success with both, but my results with same-day lays have always been significantly better, even as a beginner and an intermediate. I started young, and banging girls at parties was my only option. So I had to focus on same-day lays because going on dates was not possible because I had nowhere to bring the girl (except when my parents were away).

But even later, when I got my own logistics, or at least the girls I met had their own place, I still had more success going for the pull the same day or night of meeting them. Here are my (rough) stats:

  • I lost my virginity with a same-day lay

  • In my first four years of sexual activity, approximately 75% of my lays were same-day lays

  • In my last three years, I only had sex with four girls for the first time on a second date. Yes, I have only been on four dates the previous three years. Think about that for a bit!

  • The hottest girls I have been with have been same-day lays

I will list why I believe same-day lays are superior; however, note that there is a certain bias about my results. I intentionally opt for same-day lays because I love them. I will also share the reasons why same-day lays are awesome. Hopefully, I will clear up some misconceptions. But first, let's get practical.