Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

Tactics Tuesdays: Treat Her Hot and Horny

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

hot and horny
Some girls you do well with, some girls not so well. What’s the difference? One of the big ones: do you treat her hot and horny, or not.

This post is probably best suited to men who are intermediate and up with girls. If you’re just starting out, it’s still worth reading to know what mindset to aim for, but you may not be able to implement it just yet if you don’t have at least one type of girl you do well with consistently.

Commenting on my article “When She Picks You, It’s Vital She Feels It’s Her Choice”, a reader named Asian Guy asks:

“Hi Chase!

I sort of have a question I have been hoping to find the answer to for a while but am not sure really where to look. I’ve bought your spellbinding book and even looked at a how to date korean women book done by one of your friends. However, to this day I am still not sure how to go after korean women who are raised in a conservative society. As an example, recently I met a korean girl and after going on a few dates with her, she wouldn’t even try to really hug in public. I was told by my korean guy friends that korean girls tend not to do anything touchy feely public. After going out on 4 dates with her, I tried to go to her place (my place not logistically possible). She hemmed and hawed and said something like how she just moved in and her place isn’t ready to have people over.

A lot of the techniques here are literal gold when it comes to american women or americanized asian women, but for asian women from asia, I am still having problems. For example, a lot of times when I propose to go home with a conservative asian girl on the the first or second date, they actually seem to get offended or completely creeped out. This never happens to me with americanized asian girls, who “get” the whole thing. I’ve never been able to date the more conservative ones because they tend to be extremely cautious and the techniques that would normally work for other girls fail here. It seems that they are into a boyfriend candidate all the time. I have tried a lot to disqualify, but these girls seem hard-wired to want a boyfriend, and the moment I disqualify, they are gone.

I was curious if you had any ideas or experiences what to do here. It seems with most conservative asian girls it takes up to 6-9 dates to really go anywhere. I have recognized that there exist a lot of conservative asian girls who do sleep with men fast, but it seems those are the more rebellious type, which you can usually tell. For the ones that tend to stay home, not drink, go to the library, etc, do you have any ideas how or if you would tailor everything?

Thanks Chase!!”

First off, although this comment is about girls from Asia (and Korea in particular), it’s a microcosm of a phenomenon men face across their courtships with all girls.

That’s because just like there are men who think Asian girls from Asia are too conservative and too hard to get, there are men who think they’re ridiculously easy. Just like there are men who specialize in deflowering girls who’ve resisted sex with other men for years. And like there are men who think X type of girl is easy, even though other men think X type of girl is impossible.

So, I’m going to answer Asian Guy’s question. But in so doing, I’m also going to give you a tweak to how you approach the girls you approach that, if you implement it, will supercharge your results with them.

3 Common Roadblocks to Seduction Mastery

Denton Fisher's picture

By: Denton Fisher

roadblocks to seduction
As you seek to master the art of seduction, you’ll discover 3 key roadblocks: the first 1000 approaches, wrong practice, and too much faking.

Plateaus are the bane of any skill we seek mastery in, and they are most prominent in learned success with women. These obstructions in the pick-up community are not just speed bumps but full-on roadblocks preventing people from reaching the heights they dream of.

This article is aimed at any guy who wants to get seriously good at meeting girls via cold approach. What are the hurdles? What must you overcome to get there?

In my experience, there are three (3) major roadblocks. I call them:

  1. 1000 approaches,
  2. Deliberate practice, and
  3. Not faking but being.

How can you recognize and defeat each one as efficiently as possible?

Deep Down, Do Women Long for True Love Most of All?

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

women true love
Love seems like the ultimate female obsession. But do girls actually desire love as much as it seems? The answer is “It depends.”

In my article on dating mistakes, a reader asks about women and love:

“What about girls & wanting to fall in love? I think most women deep down want “true love”, aka to find a sexy, awesome guy who they fall in love w/ (w/ the great sex, & intrigue, mystery & all that).

Love being a strong connection, caring for & bonding, etc. Also society paints it as wife-husband but whatever the label, the concept’s the same: to fall in love w/ an awesome guy & for it to last is what most women want at the core – What do you think of that theory? ”

If you watch a lot of cinema, you’re likely quick to answer, “Of course!”

Love – it makes the world go ‘round. All you need is love. And all the other slogans like that.

And love is a wonderful thing. It’s a great emotion. It’s an important one, too.

But is it, in the innermost hearts of womankind, truly what the fairer sex seeks?

As you likely know by now, if you’re hoping for the Hollywood party line, this isn’t the site for that. However, before I give you a straight answer, I’d like to explore a little of the science on love with you.

And then we’ll talk about how important it really is to women.

Tactics Tuesdays: “That’s Fake” and Practice Mentality

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

practice mentality
When you start to change your appearance or behavior, people can call you fake. Or you might even feel fake. Yet with Practice Mentality, you can avoid all this.

In my August article on seven major dating mistakes, a reader asks about people who view (or attack) self-improvement efforts or general behavior as ‘being fake’ or ‘not being real’:

“This is regarding barriers to improving fundamentals and improving your life in general:

Did you notice how people label any potential improvement as fake? If they improve, they think, people won’t like them for who they are and that’s bad. For people who have had advantages for a long time it seems like a natural part of them.

For example:

– Someone who is fat thinks that if he loses weight and women start liking him more, then they don’t like him for who he really is. They are just a bunch of superficial cunts. But, if you’ve been thin for a long time, it seems like a part of you.

– If you dress poorly, improving your fashion will seem as fake. Who cares how you dress? People should like you for who you are. But, those who dress well will tell you it’s just a part of them – part of who they are.

– Being famous or wealthy and getting great results with women also seems fake to many people (99.999% of people don’t have access to fame or great wealth). So, you’ll hear terms like ‘fame-digger’ or ‘gold-digger’ used to describe those superficial women who like rock stars, football players or bankers/CEOs.

– The same goes for learning ‘game’. If you’re learning it, then you’re just a fake manipulator.

etc.

What do you think about this phenomenon? Is it even real or am I delusional?”

Well, first off, this is absolutely a genuine phenomenon, and it’s something every man who sits down to improve himself in one dimension or another encounters.

You start to change something about yourself, and somebody calls you fake. Or you see others change their reactions toward you as you change superficial details about yourself, and you decide they are fake. Or maybe you even look at your outward displays, deem them nothing like whom you are on the inside, and label yourself a fake.

I’m going to talk briefly about why people view people engaged in self-improvement as fake, and then I’m going to give you a useful mindset I’ve long used to not have to worry about this.

I call it the ‘Practice Mentality’. But we’ll get to that.

How to Tailor Your Image - Based on Your Lifestyle

Darius Bright's picture

By: Darius Bright

how to tailor your image
What if you’re in a university or a beach town where everyone dresses casual. How do you tailor your image to there? Via the 5 wardrobe spectrums – that’s how.

After my most recent article entitled “How Should I Dress? Men’s Guide to Sexy Going-Out Attire” was posted, I found a question in my inbox from a reader named Tom:

“Thank you for all your articles, I've learnt so much about style from you and it’s truly improved my game! I do have a question: I currently live and study in a university town in New Zealand, and the standard style for dress here (as in, for the guys that get laid) is either street wear like long sleeve shirts with basketball kind of shorts or gym track pants and Nike running/gym shoes, or a kind of 'bum' style, with baggy hooded jumpers or old rugby jerseys and often shorts. Both styles tend to incorporate caps on the head too. Quite opposite to your own style!

My question is, how much do you want to take in the local style, especially if it’s working for other guys, and how much do you want to stand out? I do want to stand out somewhat, and I'm getting the hang of trying to incorporate what you teach and what the people here do, but I find when I mix them, I often end up with a pretty 'normal' look. I imagine you travel quite a lot? If so, it would be rad to see an article on adapting your personal style to different locales!”

And what a great question it is! Except, it’s the wrong question….

You see, without knowing it, chances are you’re running into the same issue yourself.

No, you probably don’t care how to dress sexy in a university town in New Zealand. Instead, you might be wondering “How can I apply those tips when I’m dressing for work?” or “How do I dress for best results in my favorite bar or club?” or “How should I dress for day game if I live in Canada... and it’s cold?” etc.

All of the above questions point to the same core dilemma: How do I tailor my outfit to look sexy in a particular situation – without looking like I’m sticking out?

Well, if all goes according to plan, you’ll have your answer by the end of this article.

Move Fast, but Don’t Rush Her

Hector Castillo's picture

By: Hector Castillo

don't rush her
It’s important to move fast with women. Yet, you can absolutely overshoot – and get into the habit of rushing with girls instead.

In my article on skipping steps with girls who are thirsty for you, an anonymous commenter asked the following question:

“Good read. How do you reconcile your comment that "time is irrelevant to seduction" with Chase's mantra that one must move quickly? Am I misunderstanding the context?”

Perfect question. I struggled with this one for a long time. Before finding GirlsChase, I definitely understood that women love sex, and that long courtships are signs that you want something serious. Hell, I had once slept with a girl thirty seconds after meeting her. I always knew fast is good.

But I still made certain exceptions – girls who were more conservative, girls who were hotter than my usual catch, etc.

Then, when I found GirlsChase, I kept running into Chase’s motto of “move fast.” In almost every article, it was there. It infected my brain and eventually opened my eyes to how many girls I’d lost because I didn’t move fast enough.

I changed that – quickly. And my lay count skyrocketed. Women loved how aggressive I’d become.

Yet I also found that the number of girls I took out on dates was still much higher than the girls I bedded (my date-to-lay ratio, if you want to be a nerd). I would make out with them, exchange oral favors, but intercourse was not as frequent as I’d hoped.

Why were these girls not letting me go all the way?

Because I was rushing.

You see, moving fast and rushing are two different things.

How to Lead Your Seductions Logistically and Emotionally

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

lead seduction
To lead a girl through a seduction, you need to hit two (2) key points: emotions and logistics. Lead well on these, and the girl is yours.

Last time, in my article on letting her feel allowed to desire you, we discussed two aspects of mental states related to seduction – namely, building her desire for you and letting her feel allowed to desire you. The first one covered the actual induction of a state of attraction whereas letting her feel allowed puts her in a mental state where she opens up to your influence. Both are equally important in seduction.

Today we will observe seduction in a different framework. Mind you that what we will cover in this post is NOT a different way of doing things, just a different way of looking at seduction.

This framework might actually explain different key aspects of seduction, as you will see. Again, these frameworks or models are just used as a way to explain “what is” (the actual seduction process).

What we will discuss today are the “leading emotionally” dimension and the “leading logistically” dimension. Both dimensions are key aspects of seduction that should not be disregarded. They can both take place simultaneously in space and time – i.e., you can both lead emotionally and logistically at the same time.

You probably already have an idea about what “leading” means in terms of seduction, but allow me to expand the concept a little. Also keep in mind that in my report from Bulgaria I also share some real life examples in which the framework covered in this post is applied.

Eliminate Approach Anxiety: Podcast with Glenn Pearce

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

Howdy! I’m happy to bring you a special podcast I did directly myself with Glenn Pearce. Glenn’s one of the coaches I have the most respect for in the men’s dating advice industry – he’s even a guy I got coaching from myself a good 9 years back.

Tactics Tuesdays: Destroy Your Own Learned Helplessness

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

learned helplessness
Our society trains men to be helpless, for several of its own reasons. But it’s important you know helplessness is learned... not inborn.

Learned helplessness is the behavior shift that occurs when an animal or individual decides its situation is impossible to change. At this point, the individual decides he is helpless to affect the outcome, and simply gives up trying.

Some of the most tragic stories of crushed spirits come when you discuss learned helplessness. Animals who’ve been caged so long they won’t try to leave even if you leave their cage doors open. Prisoners who aren’t able to operate outside the penal system, so commit crimes to go back to the familiar comfort of the prison yard. And men who’ve been unsuccessful with women so long they don’t even try to meet them.

In a recent popular thread on our Beginners’ Forum, a forum member starts off by asking why women like dominant men and men who take the lead. But it quickly becomes clear his real issue is not a philosophical question of why women prefer dominant men, but an exploration of his desire for women, yet lack of motivation to take steps to meet, date, and sleep with them.

This article will not be about why girls desire dominance and leadership, per se. If you’d like more on those topics, see these articles:

Rather, this article will be about the phenomenon of learned helplessness in the modern male – where it comes from, who’s responsible for it, and what you can do to shake it off.

6 Major Signs Your Girlfriend or Wife Is Cheating

Denton Fisher's picture

By: Denton Fisher

signs a girl is cheating
How do you know if a girl is cheating on you? With the 6 signs: decline, blow-ups, changed plans, furtiveness, jealousy, and admission.

I was about to spend a weekend with my girlfriend up at her cabin. We had been together for three months, and I was stoked. The morning we were supposed to leave, I got an odd text: “Hey, I am going to have to change plans. My mentor is taking me to Colorado for a business trip for the weekend.”

At the time I did not think anything of it. This was a girl who could not possibly cheat. It was not until a couple days later when I saw her in a snap with some other guy traveling around in what did not look like a very platonic relationship. Even then I could not believe it.

That night I texted her something mild asking her how she was doing. She blew up at me as if from out of nowhere – I was confused. Suspicions rising, I sat down and made myself a chart of all the possibilities of what could be happening, and what the chances were she could be cheating. It quickly became clear she was fooling around. I broke it off with her. It was very painful.

As it turned out, an old lover she broke it off with to be with me was in town and wanted to whisk her away to Colorado. I personally was having severe financial issues, and I let it affect my game in terms of masculinity; it was my fault as much as hers.