Keeping It Simple for Planning Great Dates | Girls Chase

Keeping It Simple for Planning Great Dates

I can recall with distinct clarity a time in my life when I thought it was a must that you go all out when planning a first date. I’d heard it from my mother, read it in magazines and books, saw it on television, and even heard it from the horse’s mouth. Yes, even the women I’d known as friends or romantic interests were telling me I needed to pony up and make that first date as extravagant as possible!

simple dates

However, the real way to make a great first impression has absolutely nothing to do with the activity itself or the amount of money you spend – it’s all about:

  1. Your fundamentals, such as your style of clothing and voice and body language

  2. The actual interaction itself, your conversation skills, and how well you are able to lead her

  3. Your ability to hit escalation windows and pick up on opportunities to move things forward

So as Ricardus taught us, you really can go “From Street to Bed in a Snap”, and that most certainly does not require an 8-hour date at an amusement park or a $100 dinner.

J.J. JonesAbout the Author: J.J. Jones

J.J. is a prolific natural-turned-student-of-seduction who’s applied study and experimentation to great natural instincts with girls. He’d racked up 50 lays prior to his first marriage, and doubled this within a few years post-divorce after he made a concerted effort to master “game”. J.J. is a member of the Girls Chase Forums, where he posts as “NarrowJ”.

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Anonymous's picture

Hey Jones.

I have an off topic question. It is about scarcity.

I call a girl, she does not answer, and after 3-4 hours she calls me.
And after this girl calls me and i do not answer deliberately, am i sending a "scarcity message" to her or am i sending a "i am mad at you for not answering me" message to her ?

This has bugged me for a while..

I don`t get mad, accusatory or whiney... i do stay refrained from those things and also nonchalant, cool, relaxed and not bothered at all by her not answering.

Basically, how do you react to the call, when a girl isn`t answering you, and than calling you back after 3-4 hours ??


Josip's picture

Set yourself that pause never occurred. The girl's answer to your SMS and that's all that matters.

Otherwise, you risk that the girl go to auto rejection and overgame .

On one occasion I asked the girl to come to my place via SMS and she responded to me after 4 hours. She said that she works at time that I proposed, but that she can come day after. I said okay and girl came to my place day after. Simple as that.

J.J. Jones's picture

Hey Anon,

I would basically agree with Josip on this one. You're overthinking it, and the term he used - "overgaming" - would probably apply here. As guys start learning about seduction they tend to over-work a lot of situations and end up losing a girl here and there simply because they are too analytical about it, too careful and too cautious and then they start applying tactical stuff in scenarios where it's not needed.

Sometimes it just takes 3-4 hours to return a phone call, and it's not because she's playing hard to get and you need to "fight back in the face of pressure". I mean, when a girl gets a missed call from a guy who's trying to sleep with her she'll usually just not even call him back, because she figures he'll phone her again at some point. So, she doesn't even have to worry about it- she'll just go back to her everyday routine of receiving calls/messages/etcetera from the current 6 guys who are trying to get in her pants. In my mind, just the fact she even returned your call would indicate that she's pretty interested.

So, my advice on this is to just pick up the phone, lean back, and let her show you some interest... ;-)


Anonymous's picture

Thanks to both of you fellas.

It has really upped my insight into things, that otherwise i might have blew up in the future.

I`ll take your advice with care and look to implement it the right way.

Have a nice day.

Ryguy's picture

I read your material and I have to say it's very on point. I want to start by saying I'm pretty successful with women, however I do date rather young women(19 to 23) and sometimes I bang my head against the wall because I don't know how to read them. But I do want to make note that I don't date any young girl, they have to be intelligent and beautiful.

I'm 30 myself and have screwed up on enough dates to read women almost to a T. Yet this girl I'm totally confused over. Here is the story and any advice is greatly appreciate because your writings seem like you have a handle on it all.

I have been friends with this girls older sister for 10+ yrs. Funny thing is I didnt even know she had a younger sister. I found out she did one day on facebook because I commented on something and she commented back. After that we had a good long conversation where I gave her my number and told her to call me. She did within 5 min.

Fast forward to now and we have hung out (not a date per se) 2 times. First time I took her to dave & busters, we had ice cream after, went to the park and talked for a while and we had a great time. Second time I took her to a movie which we talked through (lol) and then we went back to my place and had a pretty good convo. for 2 hours about her life and family etc. The 2 times we hung out were only 2 days apart.

Now it's been more than a week, we talk quite often and it's still flirtatious but trying to get that 3rd time to hang out is becoming a challenge. She is different in the way that she like solitude because of her personality. So sometimes she likes people and sometimes she likes only herself. She actually asked me both times to hang out. I asked her this last time and she didnt blow me off but she didnt feel in the mood to hang out (and trust me i know being blown off). Now to mention she is 19 and extremely intelligent - far ahead of the game for her age or even someone who is 27. She is also extremely beautiful - she did runway shows for a while until she quickly realized how annoying all the comments of the other women and directors of the shows are.

Any ideas on how to take this from here?

J.J. Jones's picture


Sorry for the late reply! I hope this is still of use to you, if not for this girl then for future endeavors.

What seems to have happened here is that you took things too slow for her. Beautiful women like the one you are talking about in your post can be a bit of a different animal, because they tend to attract only the most assertive, dominant males. Shy-guys and lame-o's are usually going to be too intimidated to approach her. She is probably used to guys taking her out and trying to shag her the first night, which it sounds as though you didn't do.

Then, she gave you another shot at it on the second date, and you had her at your place for 2 hours and didn't make a move (ahhhhhh!)... She is probably wondering if you're ever going to work up enough courage to take her to bed.

My advice here (if you can get her out again), is to just invite her straight over to your place to cook dinner. Continue the flirty vibe, but PLEASE escalate physically with her this time. I'd probably give her a kiss, and tell her: "I owed you that", and then continue to increase touch, make out with her, get her hot and horny, and then give her a night of wild, passionate sex.

The caveat of such advice is that since you've slow-played things with her, it may come off as incongruent. But that is a risk you must take here.

Get her over to your house, kiss the girl, and take her to bed.


Ryguy's picture

Thanks for your input, I guess I never looked at it that way because she is a very closed book. Even her sister told me so. That's funny you mentioned what you did because I was actually planning on having her come to my place watch a movie and have her jump in my bed so she's cozy. From there I was going to get close to her and… Well you know the rest.

There's only one other thing though, she hasn't dated in a while because she doesn't like having strings attached. Do you think that makes any difference? Or does it possibly intensify the situation :-)

J.J. Jones's picture


That sounds as good a plan as any to me!

A little more context may help, but when a girl tells me things like that: no strings attached, not looking for anything serious right now, etctera- that usually means they're just looking to jump in the sack and have some fun.

Keep us posted, man!


Ryguy's picture

Will do :-)

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