(3) Journeyman

How can a seducer view sleeping with women as morally correct… while knowing he likely wouldn’t want his daughter to sleep around? A deep dive into sexual morality.

On Alek's recent piece showcasing three new sex talk gambits, a reader posted the following provocative comment:

Hello Alek.

I've noticed something about Girls Chase and the seduction community at large.

There seems to be a lot of cognitive bias and intellectual dishonesty in this space Re: "Sluts".

See, in this space we teach that women are human beings just like men and should therefore be free to engage in sex freely w/o judgement.

Additionally, the concept of "high body count" is a non issue to us "lovers" unless seeking an LTR.

However, the facts show that "most" women are NOT in fact built for casual sex. Most high n count women either have personality disorders, histories of child abuse, poor impulse control or high sex drives.

For the most part women barter sex for relationships and constant hookups for the average chick without committment damages her psyche. That's why FWB chicks sometimes get jaded and tired of empty sex.

Here's a thought, if women like sex so much, why cant they hold down an FWB arrangemnt in perpetuity like men would prefer?

Chase has also countered the argument that older seducers do not corrupt younger girls by fucking them young 18/19yo) because women have agency and can think for themselves.

Yet we also go on to say that women are cute little smurfs who need guidance and direction. They aren't the best decision makers particularly when young.

In short all these axioms we have here seem to be rationalisations for "lovers" to be able to fuck girls without suffering from guilt.

And one way I can prove this is to request an article titled "A Letter to my 18yo Daughter" or sth along these lines giving her advice on how to manouver sexual relations as she goes off to start her first year in college.

Would you still tell your daughter that its okay to fuck a smooth talking guy on the first date if she feels the vibe?

Would you still tell her that body count is a social construct used by prudes and puritans? One nightstands are perfectly okay.

Would you still allow her to be fucked by older dudes (30s) while in her first year of college because older man + younger chick is a completely normal thing to do?

I find it hard hard to fully embody the lover archetype because it frequently clashes with the patriach archetype inside me who thinks he might have a daughter one day.

And I understand that this site does not give womens advice because it is a mens site for MEN but in this case saying that might be an easy cop out from addressing the disingenious nature of the things we teach here Re: Women and Sex

Is it possible to be a lover and a patriach without experiencing cognitive dissonance?

Trillion Dollar Question.

I love this question, and I'd love to answer it... so, while it may be addressed to Alek, I'd like to weigh in with my thoughts on it too.

By creating a vortex of value, you can suck girls into chasing you. Yet you need two (2) key elements to NOT become the dancing monkey / friend zone guy…

Here's a little technique I like to call the 'value vortex'.

I didn't invent it, but I haven't seen it named before (or if I have I don't remember what others have called it).

It's a suspiciously-simple sounding strategy that's very easy to get wrong. Therefore I do not recommend it to beginners. Beginners will see this and want to use it, but it will backfire for them. I'll explain why below.

The basics of this strategy are that you run a seduction in such a way that you only provide value to the girl's life -- heaps of it -- while sharing next to nothing about yourself. You must also be initiating touch and getting compliance as you do it, but only in the context of providing more value to her.

The effect, if executed well and on a girl who is not immune*, is that the girl you use it with will start to chase. She will at first be intrigued by you, then she will start to chase you harder, then harder.

If not used the way I lay out in this post, however, the strategy will backfire, and you will quickly friend zone yourself.

Disclaimers out of the way, let's open up the hood on this vortex and talk using it to seduce.

There are numerous ways to make a woman love you. The five (5) we cover in this article are duty, investment, adoration, lust, and surrender – and you can use them all.

A reader named Walter commented on a recent Alek Rolstad piece to say:

But one thing that most PUAs and dating coaches never seem to talk about is how to attract women you are into when it comes to long term relationships emotionally and I am not talking about some fake shit like being a "high value man" who spends his money and uses his status so women can settle for him, I am talking about real attraction and committment. I feel like noody has ever given a real answer to this question because there simply is no technique to make a woman fall in love with you emotionally other than her being sexually and romantically attracted to you from the get go for your looks, sex appeal and mouthpiece only. That's why PUA focuses only on how to get men laid.

All right, so let's talk about love.

In particular, let's talk about making a woman love you... really love you, in a devoted way, in a long-term relationship.

I should give you some credentials first before we talk about it.

Then after that, I will introduce you to the DIALS system as a tool to help you understand how to make a woman love you, truly love you, over the long-term.

This sex talk gambit lets you reframe sex (even casual sex) as healthy and natural… and abstinence from sex as something weird a woman must avoid.

Hey guys and welcome back.

It is time for a gambit—a sex talk gambit, that is. It has been a while since I have covered a gambit. This does not mean that I haven’t come up with materials. The ongoing pandemic makes it more difficult to test gambits in field. I will never share anything that I haven’t tested properly.

Today’s new gambit is the bomb. It will allow you to:

• Talk about sex

• Reframe sexual abstinence and sexual restrictions as bad

• Promote a frame of spontaneity, openness, and curiosity

All these factors can have a huge effect on your results. If your frame is to get sexual with a girl, it will become much easier to proceed, and you will not be too many steps away from bedding her.

I need to address what I always stress:

• Gambits, including this one, can be used as presented.

• You can make variations (more complex or shorter versions) using your own words. The results will be similar if you convey the essential gist and use key mechanics. So use this gambit as an inspiration for your personal gambits.

• Take the mechanics from this and previous gambits to create your own gambit from scratch.

My results with this gambit has led to:

• Multiple lays in a very smooth and efficient manner

• Great hooks if not lays (the lay did not happen due to other circumstances)

• No bad reactions or rejections so far

I have been using this gambit since the second half of 2021 and for part of the winter. I stopped due to lockdowns and not being able to head out (this will soon change, so I will be using it again). Other experienced seducers have also had success with it.

Let’s begin. First, we will discuss “perversion” and what it means.

When you talk to girls, it must be pleasant. You need to make them smile. That doesn’t mean be a joker, but it DOES mean be someone it’s enjoyable to talk with.

When you go out to meet women, one thing you always ought to be doing is making women smile.

I don't mean being a clown or a comedian. I don't mean you have to load them up with hammy compliments or get them retelling all their happiest memories.

I just mean that women should be smiling as they're talking to you, because they like talking to you, because talking to you is a pleasure.

John Wayne was an icon of American cinema. In this piece, we break down his charisma, and show what his behavior and the behavior of others around him says about his characters.

We're gearing up to rerelease my course on charisma, Charisma in a Bottle.

In advance of the rerelease, I thought I'd do some 'charisma breakdowns' on a variety of leading men and other figures where we look at clips of the man and discuss what he does that makes him so charismatic.

Our focus will be on nonverbal (fundamentals-based) charismatic signals he puts out, social signals, and some of the charismatic subtext in his verbal communication.

To kick off the series, I'd like to start with John Wayne.

What end must you aim for in a seduction? Is it attraction? Is it stimulation? Is it to impress her so much she chases? In fact, it’s none of these… not if you want the girl, that is.

Hey guys.

I hope you are all doing well.

Let’s get ready for some advanced stuff.

Today, I would like to reflect on how the typical “ends” in pickup and seduction are not what one should strive for (aside from shagging her, of course).

By ends, I am referring to what you want to accomplish, so you get her into bed:

• Do you impress her?

• Do you stimulate her?

• Do you make her attracted? (I prefer the word “compliance”)

Are these ends the correct ones? That’s what we will discuss. I will cover the typical concepts of ends and why they are not real ends or simply just a means to an end.

Then I will cover what the real ends are.

This post should not be confused with “the end game” of seduction and whether your end goal with a woman is a relationship or casual sex. Only you can provide the answer to that question.

So we will discuss which ends to focus on to have the most results. This is a more objective approach than trying to answer the subjective question of what type of relationships you’d like to have with women.

I will start with basic concepts and get into complex stuff later. Let’s dive in.