Tell If a Girl Likes You: Are Her Walls Up, Or Down? | Girls Chase

Tell If a Girl Likes You: Are Her Walls Up, Or Down?

if a girl likes youWalking back from the gym this afternoon, under the hot summer sun, I was a bit of a mess. My shirt was drenched in sweat; my arms were stiff and wooden; my hair was a little messy; and I was still breathing a little heavy.

I noticed a girl walking toward me, dressed in rather fancy garb, and as she saw me, she pulled her face into a mildly contorted look that spoke somewhat of disgust. But, at the same time, she also couldn't seem to take her eyes off of me, and I noticed those eyes scanning me up and down; she brushed her hair back, and as she walked toward me, she ever so slightly veered toward me.

I've met lots of girls like this before. Girls that, on first glance, might appear to be completely put off by you. But if you read between the lines, their more subtle actions tell a different story. In fact, I've taken some of these women who gazed upon me with what looked like disgust as lovers, oftentimes rather quickly.

What I want to get across here is, how to tell if a girl likes you -- or not -- isn't always as cut and dry a case as you might think.

Sometimes it can even be the opposite of what you initially thought -- and that holds for both the girls you think like you, and the girls you think don't.

Chase AmanteAbout the Author: Chase Amante

Chase woke up one day in 2004 tired of being alone. So, he set to work and read every book he could find, studied every teacher he could meet, and talked to every girl he could talk to to figure out dating. After four years, scads of lays, and many great girlfriends (plus plenty of failures along the way), he launched this website. He will teach you everything he knows about girls in one single program in his Mastery Package.


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Anonymous's picture

Hello Chase,

Your article makes a lot of sense, it took me a while to figure out 1/4 of the information you mentioned on my own. Women can fake flirting very easily and i kick myself realy hard for believing i fell for it hard, usually 'natural flirters' are the one who have tons of 'guy friends' that keep trying hard to impress....
From my experience i have dated a girl for roughly 5 months, she was flirting like crazy (in person and txting/phone), she knew what turned me on and was realy good at it... But guess what, when it was time for us to meet up she would flake out and cancel on me, in 5 months we've been out 3 times( i was being very presistant untill i got bored by her behaviour and broke it off).
I read your article and decided to test it out for myself...

A few weeks later i met another young lady, she seemed very stiff (she's cute, funny but doesn't flirt... Not even one bit!!) i thought she wasn't into me, got her number and asked her out.... We've been together for three months now and still going (she still doesn't flirt, but in person she can't get her hands off me.. Even in public!), eventhough i tried less with this one i seem to get good results so far which was rather confusing at first, but thanks to your topics... Everything does make sense.


Anonymous's picture

Hey guys just need help i understand this but not sure with this one
Now theres this girl i really like but im not sure a few people said she does but its too hard to believe let me give major examples:
ok twice she said to me i mean alot to her....
she said on my birthday... Hope ur day is as special as u are.. then wen she was ignoring me b4 i said forget it and she said on my facebook wall sorry and for me to forgive her and she said please...
and in college we was always close except wen her friends cum around
and she said 1nce tht she miss me
and wen i said 2 weeks ago tht i wud call her she said i am waiting for ur call
then the next at times shes ignoring me ppl says maybe family problems which at times she did say tht
and seem not bothered at times so it left me confuse
And she said she wont go on dates with boys and there was good news for me she accepted to go cinemas with me but i dont know maybe its because she never had a boyfriend (she tells me that she rejects them) but i can be different can i?? Need Help please help me.

Anonymous's picture

Noticed a section where it sounded like you were pretty tired or something.

"Women a man's managed to alienate or send into auto-rejection will as well construct walls, though this is because they afraid of him thinking they like him rather than because they're afraid of ending up liking him."

Great articles though, it seems that it is true that actions do speak louder than words.

Anonymous's picture

Ok so a couple days ago I had a party and it was great but when I walked in
The girl I love and have a crush on she was there with my really good girl that's a
Friend well when I walked in and she grabbed my arm and pulled me to her and I wrapped her up in my arms!! And then when she had to leave she came up to me and hug me for a mintute or two but when she got do I was gonna walk behind her to go get something but then she was like hmm how do I say this she was making her hand go down my arm and trying to hold my hand and she know that I like her but she has a boyfriend... And she said to me (txting) she's like ohh I love you sooo much and stuff and she made me feel really happy and I just love her so much and I need y'all's help on how to get her

Thanks guys

Anonymous's picture

She likes u go deep inside

Anonymous's picture

Thanks so much for all you great articles! Keep up the good work!

Anonymous's picture

I'm in the gray here I feel, Chase. This one girl I've seen a few times now and talked to seems to be comfortable sometimes with her walls down: •She seems quite comfortable around you -- maybe even excited
•She willingly offers compliance and goes with you when you ask
•She focuses on building rapport and finding commonalities with you
•She returns and maintains strong eye contact with you (or shy, flirty eye contact)
•She goes along easily with your deep dives and efforts to get to know her

The walls I haven't seen as frequently are the physical ones: •Her arms and legs are uncrossed
•Her body's turned towards you, or she's leaning into you
*Sometimes she sits close next to me and our knees our touching, sometimes she sits at a noticeable distance, sometimes she touches my arm when we talk and are on a "high", sometimes she allows me to touch parts of body/arm/leg if it's the subject matter of our conversation. I can't clearly recall if she's ever faced her body toward me, other than when her seat is angled directly. And most of the time she has sat with her legs crossed (never arms crossed), but then again it could be because she's usually dressed in very short dresses/skirts and maybe don't want other creepers peeking a look? Help me out with a more attuned reading between the lines please?

Anonymous's picture

I'm a girl, and I didn't even realise I do this - but yeah, you're totally right - the movement thing is a clincher. Fascinating lol, I'm not so sure about the categories (distraction, sure-thing etc.) but yeah - great article!

Anonymous's picture

Hi... Chase,

How r U?

I'm completely confused, please............ help me.

there is a girl, I like. We always meet at the bus stand every evening. I think she also likes me. because she gives me signs of attraction. Like hair preening, come & stand close to me, prolonged eye contact (whenever she makes eye contact with me, she never break the eye contact). She has always kept standing form where I can see her. Now a days, she has stated hovering in my space. whenever she finds me standing at the bus stand. She does walk past by me & then goes to her space (where she was standing). She does this thing everyday.

She was first noticed by me in jan.2013. I don't want to bother her but I need a friend.
One more thing, I have never seen her smiling at me. She looks at me curiously but no smile.
because I've never been in relationship. that's why I'm very confused about her feelings. Could you please tell me meaning of hovering next to me and starring at me without smile.

Sometimes she tried to stand in front of me, does she wants me to talk to her.

many Thanks in advance -

piccoloClean's picture

Do you talk to her, do you ever talk to her? When you make eye contact did you mean you look at each other without breaking eye contact? Need more info.. think about this... has any other chick ever acted like this around you? I would start the pursuit, test the waters, over all this time all the questions you want to ask her. Ask them slowly, calmly, not right after another, show that you're taking time to listen and digest her information. Stay calm, don't be nervous, save that for when you have to ask her dad forher hand in marriage. You can do this, trust your instinct, you're allowed to figure this out, the whole world is based on mackin women.

I'm here because my dad macked on my mum.. so forth so forth. It's not rocket science. She can't hurt you, if your heart is broken, it gets stronger, you keep going, you don't stop until you meet your right one... go ahead and take a shot, you've got nothing to lose.

That's my opinion, but chase will know alot more so maybe wait for his reply.. :)

Anonymous's picture

Chase, i really liked your article and well i have this love problem, and i need your advice, on june 29 of 2014 i went to Arizona with a friend with her family and my family to her aunt's house and well there i met her cousin which is my age and well when we met i felt that spark that said SHE'S the one, and well that day her cousin and i would talk a,little and flirt a little,smile, and have eye contact, she's shy and quiet but i don't mind, but like that same,day i managed to get her kik username, and well i left home the next day, and well i texted her a couple days later but it was,awkward but then after tht first conversation she asked me,if i wanted to be friends and i said sure but we hardly text we only texted like 3-4times pls,help ME what does this mean, does she not like me? Or is she being polite? Or is this friendship a,fake? Because i really have feelings for her, common bro HELP ME conquer her pls thxs bro!!!

Steve30m's picture

Hey Guys,

I really need help with this. There is this girl that I like deeply and her family keep telling her to keep away from me. I know her family very well and I have helped them with many things but they told the girl not to speak to me. Whenever I see her around relatives house she keeps looking at me every now and then, in fact most of the time even when everyone around. Everyone in the house notices that we are looking at each other for couple of seconds. she tries to make conversation with her friends and laughs or smiles while talking and I can tell she is looking in the corner of her eye.

She always sits not opposite but sort of 45 degrees from me, and crosses her legs away from me and not moving her legs at all, not even shaking it.

everything about her tells me she likes me but i am not sure about her legs. her smile and her look tells me that she cares. If i leave the room or go home suddenly she looks sad or grabs her mobile and looks it as if she is going to text someone. She is happy when I am there but my brother tells me that she looks sad all night if i leave early.

we look at each other a lot. I mean over do it. she knows that I love her because I have told her before but her family is filling her head. since we met we have always looked at each other alot. stared into each others eyes, she roles her eyes away. or keep looking from the corner of her eye.

please someone just tell me what to do ...or how to go about talking to her gently.

thank you

Anonymous's picture

so there's this girl in my class who I have a huge crush on. I've talked to her once or twice but she sort of gives me an uninterested vibe but there are times where she seems very interested. I really want to get intimate with this girl but I don't know if she's into me or not.. Any advice?

Hugh's picture

So quite recently I was with this really really nice girl and we really seemed to have something going. On Thursday we went out and it went really well. The next day at school she is walking around with her ex. Btw she is a sophomore, I am a freshman and her ex is a senior. She was dating him last year as a freshman. So the next day after school she left the school with her ex. She later called me up a few hours later. Saying that she had a lot of fun times with me but just wants to be friends for now. The problem I have with this is she was into me before I even knew her and she wanted to date me. We dated and things were going great and then she just left. It really confused me.

Asten's picture

Can't tell you how much you've helped me just TODAY, Chase. These articles are gold, I relate to almost every single one of them being a guy who's always trying to get with girls but never succeeding, only in ways that many would consider being put in the "friend zone". I finally see all of my mistakes written plainly before me, right here. I just read five of your articles in a row (now half-way through my ten free ones), and I'm planning on reading the other five tonight.

Can't adequately explain how helpful all of this is, really can't wait to try some of these techniques out and interact with potential lovers with all this new-found knowledge, and practice my seduction and hopefully improve to the point where I'm not sexually frustrated more often than not. Thanks dude, keep it up, and don't be surprised if you get a book order sometime soon!

jerry's picture

Hey Richard,

I start seing this 55 year old wonderful Ecuadorian woman around three weeks ago. In the beginning everything was sweet and good. We could make fun of each other, teash, call each other
names and make no big deal out of it. We can talk about sex, I'm asking her what she likes. But last Friday hell broke loose, when I after telling her a fantasy I had, said : " Smack my ass and call me Suzie." ( meaning something is good.) Remember the line from the episode of Friends, the sitecome, about the food critic who turns up high and start eating everything he can find and say this.) She completely hated that. She has been living abroad for years - and I thought she knew what it meant. But she thought I meant it literally and took it as an insult. She just came out of long relationship and very sensitive and nervous around me, she says. In other words, I could have said : strawberry ice cream is really not strawberry and I would have gotten the same reaction. I really would like her back at one point and why I write. But what do I do? She definitely needs time and how do I go about her, since I never had problems with dating Latinas before. I really, really like her. But for some reason(s) she is scared of me, She wants me back one day, only give up on me the next. She said many she is not ready, that I'm coming on to strong. The age thing, maybe, too. But if I'm asking if she can give me an example of this, she won't give me any and shuts down like a oaster. and caught out of her life. But if she really means it, why does she keep inviting me back into her life, when she is still not ready for any kind of realtionship,, just coming out of a long marriage? She is saying all these things that are making no sense, being an intelligent woman. Another thing: She is keen on asking me all of these questions: wanna see pictures of my family, get a cell phone, so on, Fine. Yet when I'm telling show her and tell her the truth, it just making things worse. So whatever I'm doing it's bad and wrong, she doesn't listen and so forth. But how do you communicate then, when there is no foundation, when everything is for sell? It's just drama, heart, childlike and suspecion. She is just extermely sensitive, suspecious. Maybe she wants another kid, even she got three and says she can't have kids no more. Maybe it's a lie? Maybe not. I don't know. I hate this walking on egg shelves and she is not taking any kind of responsibility, well, she is in no position to make any kind of decision that are making any sense at this point.
Sincerely, Jerry, 40 years old.

Bryan's picture

Ok I need help with this one..When a girl says don't fall in love with me does she actually mean this or is she actually sending a subtle message..

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