Kissing

Today we're going to talk about how guys get the first kiss wrong.

We've had a slew of articles on Girls Chase about how to get the first kiss right.

It's a fairly long list:

1. How to Kiss Her: kiss basics

2. Manhandle Kisses: an aggressive, dominant kiss

3. Can't-Miss Tips for Getting the First Kiss with a Girl: tips for the first kiss

4. How to Kiss a Girl Like No One's Ever Kissed Her Before: step-by-step kiss guide

5. How to Kiss Girls in Public and Have It Go Great: kissing girls in public

6. How to Be a Good Kisser: 5 Steps to Confident Kissing: mindsets, techniques, and tactics for great kisses

7. Tactics Tuesdays: How to Make Her Kiss You Back: getting her to kiss you back when you kiss

8. The Kiss and Other Mouth Moves in Physical Escalation: using kisses to move the courtship forward

9. Tactics Tuesdays: The 5-Second Kiss: kiss a girl five seconds after you first meet

10. Tactics Tuesdays: Kisses for Good Behavior: reward her with a kiss

11. 3 Legendary Movie Manhandle Kisses to Model Your Kisses After: examples of manhandle kisses in action, so you can see exactly what these look like

One subject we haven't delved into on kisses much though, is things to avoid doing with the kiss.

All those first kiss mistakes you can (and many guys do) make.

We've talked about some things to avoid here and there. But we haven't covered them all. And not all in the same place.

For this piece, I've compiled the top five ways guys blow the first kiss. They're all here in one place, for your easy perusal.

Note that I am going to leave out the most common way guys blow the first kiss, which is to not actually make the first kiss at all. Whether that is because they wait too long for the right moment, or they even feel the right moment but can't summon the courage to kiss, this is the most common way to blow it. However, we've addressed this mistake extensively in the other kiss articles (above). In this article I want to focus on things guys do wrong when they make the actual kiss (rather than wilt out of hesitation).

After we talk about each way to botch the kiss, of course, we'll talk about how to not blow these aspects of the kiss, too.

Here's the list of the top five biggest ways guys blow that first kiss (and how not to).

A great first kiss is what sets a steamy romance into motion. An awkward slurp might put the tension on ice, but a tantalizing lip-lock can lead to so much more.

The first kiss doesn’t need to be magical. It doesn’t need to be special. But it would be a lot better if it was. What is true to women in the context of romance is more about what feels true.

If she feels like a kiss was great, it will be true that it was great.

If she feels that she likes you, precisely because the kiss was so great, then it is true that she really likes you.

The exact nature of how women think and feel is better explained in my article on why women are emotional but not irrational.

To put it simply, what women feel is what’s real.

And for the sake of sexual strategy and navigating the social waters of the world, it’s quite an accurate compass. It’s far more accurate, on average, than cold logic.

How does this tie into giving her a great first kiss?

I explained it above. You want her to feel as if the first kiss was great, so she feels she likes you and that you two are having a great time together.

This may sound overly technical to some, and while I may even grant it is a bit nerdy, it doesn’t mean it’s not a good strategy.

As men, it’s generally good practice to go for strategy over feelings. I’m not saying don’t feel. That would be ridiculous. There would be no point to this entire website if we didn’t embrace our sexual and romantic desires toward women. You would be a machine who sleeps with women and dates them for purely intellectual rewards. That would be strange. Countless other pursuits would be more enjoyable on a purely intellectual field than seduction (and even then, you’re still chasing desire. Intellectual desires and carnal desires are only different in their appearance, but they are both desires all the same).

But enough philosophizing.

What is a good strategy for the first kiss?

There are many factors to cover, and some tips will be universal while others will be based on preference (i.e., you can choose to follow one tip rather than another).

Let’s get to it.

3 classic manhandle movie kisses that made women melt on-screen and in the audience. Plus, the breakdowns for how to kiss women the way these men did.

Eight years ago we introduced manhandle kisses, those magical, manly kisses that turn a resistant or hesitant woman to one who melts into you.

Watching/seeing is often better than merely reading, though, so today we’re going to look at a few examples from cinema history.

First, a caveat on manhandle kisses: if you can’t read women well, don’t use manhandle kisses. Save them for when your experience levels are up and your instincts honed. If you’re in the West, be somewhat careful with manhandle kisses regardless your skill, instinct, and experience levels. Most Western women fortunately aren’t false rape accusing nutbags, but there is a moral panic in swing in the late 2010s English-speaking world, and it’s gotten trickier than when we ran the first manhandle kisses article way back when.

If you can avoid being a complete doofus about these kisses, though, a manhandle kiss is an awesome, mighty way to make a splash with a girl who was on the fence about kissing you... or who’d grown gun-shy after all the buildup to the kiss.

Below you’ll find three (3) legendary manhandle kisses taken from movie history – plus, the analysis to go with them.

When a girl does something good, you can reward her with a cheek kiss… and open up the floodgates of romantic and sexual potential.

This is a fun little tactic I’ve employed over the years that does a lot of good things for you.

The tactic is simple: when she does something you like, give her a peck on the cheek, neck, shoulder, or lips.

There’s a little nuance to it, because the power of the kiss will be tied to the level of investment she gives you. The bigger the investment, the weightier the kiss. The lesser the investment, the lesser the kiss.

I’m going to do a quick section to tell you why this is good. And then I’ll give you a few examples of how and where you’d use it.

We don't talk much on here about how to kiss a girl, typically because we're more focused on helping you to get girls in bed - why spend much time on the appetizer when you can skip right to the main event?

But even if you're working to turn yourself into the kind of irresistible man a woman simply can't say "no" too, it's still worth putting some time into bringing up your kissing technique. Why? Because it's one of those small edges that fold into the big picture that is you, and the impression you make on girls.

In other words, being a talented kisser makes you better able to achieve the kind of results you really want with women: namely, hot, steamy liaisons with beautiful girls you really dig.

Even if you simply run through a seduction quickly with a woman, and then plant a mind-blowing kiss on her, it still helps:

• It helps remove any last minute resistance you might run into prior to intimacy,

• It helps her switch off her logical mind and be there in the moment,

• And it helps her realize that yes, you are exactly the kind of charming, seductive, sexy man she's always dreamed of meeting.

So on those notes, I want to address the reader from Slovenia who commented the following over on the article on how to get a phone number:

“I've read around 95% of your articles and let's say trained myself to an intermediate level... or something more than a pure begginer lets say.
Tnx to you again ;)

Still I have problems when it comes to Physical Escalation... but not problems with getting laid. I have serious problems with the transition from conversation to kissing. Once the kissing is on I have very few problems with bed magic.

I have actually never read any insight that would break down how to get closer and closer, when/how to start putting my arm around or something, hug her, kiss her on her cheeks or I don't fkin know... My question would sound like this:

HOW to get to kissing part if you do everything wright?

I have serious problems with this transition. And I angry even more because I know I would have gotten laid so many times If I had only mastered this part... And I will sooner or latter.”

And he's right. That's a tough transition, from conversation to kissing and being physical together, and for a lot of guys it can be one of the most challenging things to learn. Transitions in general are pretty tough stuff, and you'll find that most of your obstacles as you improve with women and dating come when you find yourself struggling to transition from one phase of an interaction to the next.

So let me give you an article on how to kiss a girl that'll help you navigate this transition a lot more smoothly... a lot more naturally... and as a bonus, teach you exactly how to lay one on her that she'll remember for a long, long time.