Fundamentals

For my first few years actively learning how to get girls, there was one thing I struggled with above all else: how to be attainable. Value I understood; be an attractive, high-value man, and women will want you. Investment was straightforward enough; get people putting in more work, and they'll come to value you more highly.

But how the heck did attainability work? I couldn't get my mind around it. I got the concept logically, but emotionally I was still checked out.

I had no clue how to really be attainable. I couldn't even figure out how to tell if not being attainable enough was my problem... or if I was coming across lower in value, or I needed to get more investment.

The excerpt I chose for today's excerpts post covers some of the ground floor stuff on attainability. This selection is from my eBook, How to Make Girls Chase: Every Tactic and Technique You Need to Get the Girl(s) of Your Dreams, and in it, we go into the four essentials you need to know to properly manage your attainability (and keep from sending women into auto-rejection [you're too unattainable] or just friends [you're too attainable]).

I'm listening to Nassim Nicholas Taleb's book Fooled by Randomness: The Hidden Role of Chance in Life and in the Markets on audio right now. It's a good and insightful listen, and a good refresher, though not much different from what you'll already be familiar with if you're well-acquainted with the effects of happenstance on the world around you. Randomness and luck is an important topic when you talk about pick up and how to get lucky; it was the subject of one of the very first posts that ever went up on this blog, all the way back in December 2008: the brief "Randomness and Success," where I talked about another book I was reading at the time and the need for including quantity in your approach to meeting women.

Last night I had a discussion with a business partner of mine about the nature of randomness and its influence on success. "Surely, it isn't all randomness," she said. "Skill has a big part to do with it."

"That's true," I replied, "skill does have a lot to do with it. A lot depends on the time horizon you're looking at, however. If you're looking at how someone performs over the course of a single week, there's going to be a lot more random variation in there compared to how they perform over the course of a month, which will be a lot more random and less skill-based than how they perform over a year, and so on and so forth. The smaller the time horizon, the bigger the part randomness will play."

…and when I say “street-to-bed” in a day pick up, I’m not talking about the red light district either!

When I first started approaching women, that was THE big motivator for me – okay, at the time it wasn’t even about taking them straight back to my bedroom just yet; in fact, if we’d have sex on the third date that would have been fine for me back then.

But, all the beautiful girls I’d see downtown every day had me *wishing* I knew what to say and do to meet them, and to start some form of relationship with them.

Today, first sex on the third date has become a very rare occurrence, and I’ve since learned that given the right circumstances and the right guy, almost all women will have sex on the first date, no problem… so all you need to do is CREATE the right circumstances, and BECOME the right guy.

We’ve talked about this topic on the blog before, and about what it takes to be that sexy man that women want and to create these circumstances to pick up a girl fast - feel free to review these two articles real quick and then come back here.

Back with me?

Great… then let’s talk about how to make that happen RIGHT after you approach a girl in the street during day pick up.

There's no denying it - women love a strong man. Forget the whole "sensitive man" fad that swept through the West... women might say they want a sensitive man, but the sensitive man isn't the one who actually stirs their heartstrings... or their loins, for that matter.

But how do you be a "strong man?" Do you have to be a bodybuilder, or be skeptically squinting your eyes at everyone and everything all the time?

In fact, that's hardly the case. To be a strong man is something entirely different from muscles or a stubbly face (although, those two can certainly help). It's about a lot more than that, as it were.

In this section from my eBook How to Make Girls Chase: Every Tactic and Technique You Need to Get the Girl(s) of Your Dreams, I detail for you some of the most important elements in coming across with the women (and the men) you meet as a strong man. And they aren't what you might think they are... read ahead.

In the first edition of this two part series on how to get laid every time, we covered all the ground rules… all the fundamentals about why girls sometimes resist having sex at first, and all the most important ways to deal with it.

Now let’s dive into the topic a bit deeper and look at a few more little ninja tricks and tactics – so you will always know what to do, no matter what the situation.

This is called contingency planning, and we discussed it more broadly in the post on when she doesn't have time (and other contingencies)… today we’ll look at it specifically in the context of the last few yards.

There aren’t many things more frustrating than picking up a beautiful girl, getting her phone number, going out on a date with her, bouncing home together, making out on the bed and getting each other all aroused…

…only to be stopped at the last second!

Maybe she won’t let you take off her panties, or maybe she’ll stop you at her bra… maybe she’ll block you every time you move towards the erogenous zones, or maybe she’ll simply tell you that she won’t sleep with you.

It’s like playing a video game for hours and hours and then losing your last life to the final boss fight… and there is no "save" feature!

This inability to consistently get a girl in bed is an upper-intermediate sticking point… it’s not something you’ll run into a lot when you’re still struggling to summon up your guts to approach girls in the first place.

But it’s also something that is going to happen less and less once you figure out how to get laid with girls consistently.

Personally, I went nuts when I was working on this sticking point… it really IS the most frustrating stage of your learning curve as a seducer, because you end up with blue balls every time!

Let’s see if we can save you from some of that swelling to the point of agony….

For the good of all mankind.

“Nothing much to do... I’m at home and I think I’m so addicted to your passionate sex... I still can’t get over last night… I love it.”

If you’re not regularly receiving text messages like that, even from seasoned party girls - and you could use a primer on how to be a good lover - read on.

The next text she sent me was:

“Hmm… what is your secret magic?”

I didn’t tell her… but I’m going to tell you.

And if you don't know how to make girls crawl the walls, you really need to learn how to. It does a lot for your confidence… and it does a lot for your ability to hang onto a girl you really like.

Really, there's no reason that you shouldn't be able to give a girl an orgasm multiple times when you're sleeping with her.

And once you're able to do this, then you can approach women knowing that you will give them the best sex of their lives... And that's powerful.