Journeyman have been at it a while and have begun to develop major good habits and success streaks as practitioners of the social arts
If you want a second chance in dating, you'll have to convince your date to give you one, first… Fortunately, that's often easier to do than you might think.Who says there's no second chances in dating?
I just coached a guy through a situation where he's encountering a lot of "I'm just not feeling it" and "we just don't have chemistry" objections from women.
Indirect game's strength comes from its reliance on ambiguity… which ignites a woman's curiosity about you, the mysterious man she can't seem to faze.Hey there, and welcome back.
Last week, after sharing why I do not believe in direct game, I started my indirect game series, discussing what it is and how it is run.
For our purposes, indirect game is a form of seduction where:
The seducer keeps his level of interest ambiguous until the girl starts showing interest (usually starting the interaction showing her little to no interest)
The level of interest (and disinterest) you show her is proportional to the girl and the circumstances
The way you show interest remains ambiguous, providing you with flexibility
The idea is to calibrate your actions to the girl.
When mastered, indirect game leads to better meet-to-lay ratios (higher chances of you getting THAT girl as opposed to any girl after many approaches). This is because you calibrate things to the girl.
You maintain more control over the frame of the interaction, so she is more likely to chase you (if done right), giving you a higher chance of generating compliance, making it much easier for you to escalate the interaction toward sex.
Today I would like to discuss compliance a bit further.
Compliance is how willing she is to follow your lead. We can break it down into three categories:
Her overall interest in you and her desire to act
Her willingness to follow your lead
The absence of resistance to the above
I’ll cover resistance in more detail next week when I talk about escalating the interaction to sex using indirect game. I’ll discuss how indirect game helps you avoid resistance and how to deal with it.
Today let’s focus on generating (and maintaining) compliance.
You should never put a woman in her place. That would be controlling or misogynistic. Right? Well actually, sometimes it's exactly what she wants.Ever put a woman in her place, and have her love you for it?
A lot of guys are afraid to do this today. They don't want to be disrespectful. They don't want to come off as sexist. They certainly do not want to seem controlling.
This is a thing we simply deal with as men.
Sometimes though, a woman will go into testing overdrive.
She's got a bee in her bonnet (or a bug up her behind) for whatever reason. And now she's just going to nag and needle and critique you.
You'll see this most in relationships. But you'll encounter it occasionally in-field too.
And believe it or not, if you allow yourself to set aside your normally calm demeanor, and firmly put her in her place, much of the time, perhaps to your surprise, women will love you for it.
People don't cheat for no reason. The top five causes of infidelity are things that can happen to anyone – and very often do.A surprisingly large number of my coaching clients are victims of infidelity.
I'll agree, but on these terms… That's the gist of a compliance swap: you agree to what she asks of you, but propose something of your own in return.Sometimes a woman insists on doing something a certain way and there's no good way out of it for you.
Sometimes you have to travel a far distance to meet her, and it's unrealistic to get her to come to you.
Sometimes she's getting pulled along with a group of people and your only shot with her is to tag along, but in so doing you risk looking like a follower.
How can you maintain a modicum of a leadership role and keep her compliance up even as you invest in things yourself?
With a compliance swap!
This neat little tactic gives you the power back in seemingly powerless situations... and can even make the dice roll your way.
Women run off when men come on too strong for them. Yet, they lose interest when men come on too weak. You must calibrate to the girl to effectively seduce.Alek's recent strident indictments of direct game (part 1 | part 2) caused a small uproar on here and generated a flurry of both nodding heads and vociferous disagreements.
The main arguments against Alek's position of "direct game does not work (very well)" seem to be 1.) "well, it works for me", and 2.) what about guys whose methods are primarily direct game, a la Hector Castillo?
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I'd like to address both Alek's point that very direct game usually doesn't work as well as more indirect game, plus the fact that sometimes it does work (though not nearly as consistently).
Note that we aren't talking about direct vs. indirect openers here. We're talking about the whole game system a man employs. I'd add that what Alek recommends (as well as what I do), while we tend to call it 'indirect game', is really an indirect-direct fusion that combines elements of both styles, but leans a bit more indirect than direct. I'll spell out more what the difference is between direct and indirect as we go.
In today's article, I'll boil down the answer to those questions above with a simplified framework that anyone can understand. That framework is this:
In a good seduction, what allows you to proceed with the girl is similarity of interest.
The closer your expressed level of interest is to the level of interest she's currently feeling, and the better you pace her interest levels as the seduction progresses, the better able you are to hold her interest and guide the seduction toward a licentious night in bed.
What trips men up on interest levels?
Either showing
interest in the girl they're courting.
Women will resist you and object to what you say. Yet you must be able to escalate things with them anyway. Once you can, success with girls gets simpler.I've been seeing a bit more lately of guys scratching their heads and asking, "How do I do XYZ thing?" and not really getting it.
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So I wanted to start an ongoing series (like Tactics Tuesdays and Secrets to Getting Girls) that gives basic advice on how to develop uncommon-but-useful skills and abilities.
Today the focus is on moving things along (escalating) despite women's objections.
If a woman objects to things you say you want her to come do with you, will you still find a way to do them, or will you give up?
Backing off, redirecting, or biding your time can be an okay strategy sometimes. But other times, it's a seduction death knell.
A good seducer knows when to push as well as when to back off and let the woman come to him.
And right now, we'll take a close look at the former.
"Be strong" and no woman can whip or cuckold you, right? Well, the truth is, no matter how strong a man is, if he picks the wrong woman, she still may.There's this myth in male corners of the Internet that to not end up whipped, walked on, and cuckolded by women you've just got to be 'strong'.
If you can be strong enough, women will respect your strength and not cuck you.
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And while strength of frame is one of the most important elements in a man's character (and thus, his ability to retain his women), this alone is not nearly enough.
The unpleasant fact is this: every day, in every part of the world, women are cuckolding strong men.
Many a man, overconfident in his strength, walks into relationships where wily women gain the upper hand over him, whip him (also called 'betaizing' him), or cuckold him.
Hubris, the downfall of many a hero in the old Greek tragedies, causes the fall of these men too.
Yet the fate of these men is avoidable for you.
All it takes is a little humility... a little more self-awareness... and a healthy dose of self-control.
If the morals aren't a problem for you, there are some serious upsides to dating a married woman. Yet it isn't all sunshine… there are things to be wary of, too…Today I want to talk about the good and bad things about dating a married woman.
I’ve got a bit of experience with married women. I use the term “dating” lightly because the definition of “dating” is: a form of romantic courtship with the aim of assessing the other’s suitability as a partner, in an intimate relationship, or as a spouse.
I’ll assume that you’re not looking for a long-term relationship or marriage if you’re dating a married woman. If you are, then you’ve got one hell of a journey ahead.
Ask a girl to do something, and she'll think about it. Sometimes she decides for you; sometimes not. Yet if she's about to decide "not", you MAY be able to intercept that…In sales, you learn early on to make a proposal, then shut up and let the prospect decide.
"Whoever talks first loses," is the way my old boss and sales trainer taught me.
Well... talks first once you've proposed something and the prospect's deliberating, that is.
However, there's one exception to this rule, and that exception is this: when you can tell the prospect is talking himself out of it.
This is a bit of a nuanced thing to catch.
Therefore, this article is really only intended for intermediate and up students of the game. It'll be most useful for men who are already at least somewhat advanced with women, and will be able to attune to the signals we'll talk about here a lot more easily.
If you're a beginner, you can ignore this article for now and hew to "whoever talks first loses (after you've made a proposal)", and it'll server you well the majority of the time.
But if you're farther along than 'beginner', it's time to take a more nuanced view.
