(2) Intermediate

You were just about to ask her out. You were just about to make a move. You were just about to make the relationship serious. But women don’t wait for you. Why must girls be so impatient?

There's a recurring theme you see when you're in this industry long enough.

Well, actually, you see a lot of recurring themes.

But one of them is guys complaining about how women don't wait for them.

Men complain that women don't wait for them across so many domains:

• "I wanted to ask her out, but it's like she lost interest and moved on. Why couldn't she wait for me?"

• "We were having such a great conversation, and I was getting ready to make a move, but the emotions changed and she left. Why didn't she wait just a little longer for me?"

• "I'd been talking to this girl for weeks and had some really great dates with her. Then she texted me she'd started seeing someone else. I thought we had a great thing. Why didn't she wait?"

• "This girl and I were dating for five months. She kept asking me how I felt about her, and I didn't really have an answer. Then eventually she began to pull away, and broke up with me. I just realized I'm crazy about her. I want to give her everything she wanted, but it's too late. I don't understand why she didn't wait for me?"

Long-time readers know the first part of my answer: attraction has an expiration date.

Just because she's into you now doesn't mean she will be four hours from now if you don't take advantage of it while it's there.

But what about for the guys who are in relationships?

Why do women ditch guys they've been dating for months, who were just about ready to offer that next step up in the relationship those women had sought?

Is there any relation between women not waiting in relationships, where they're already intimate with the man, and women not waiting for men they're not yet intimate with?

A mental priority of men and women alike is to preserve internal consistency. Threats to that cause resistance – both in the women you want, and in you, yourself.

People do and say a lot of hypocritical things.

But what happens when you call someone out on an act of hypocrisy? Does he say, "Whoops, my bad! You caught me slipping"?

No, of course not. That almost never happens.

Instead, the usual reaction is what? Defensiveness and denial. Auto-rejection is also a common response.

Imagine you try to go home with a girl you met at a bar, and she tells you, "I don't just hook up with some guy I just met." But two hours later, you see her leaving the bar... with some other guy she met after she talked to you.

So you stop her and, feeling a little salty, say to her, "I thought you didn't go home with guys you just met?"

How will she react?

I think you can imagine how she will.

She'll either be:

• Incensed: "What are you, my dad? Get away from me!"

• Denying: "Actually we know each other" (might be a lie!)

• Embarrassed: "Umm, I just need to go home now, sorry John" (you cockblocked the other guy)

At no point is she going to just say, "Ha, good point! You caught me in an act of inconsistency. Bully for you!" then just continue with what she was doing.

But internal consistency goes a lot deeper than this.

It reaches the way a man interacts with a woman he wants to pair with, or with another man he wants to form a connection with.

And it even reaches the heart of a man's very thoughts about himself, the way he conducts his life, and his ability (or inability) to do what he needs to do.

Want to optimize your seductions? Step 1: learn effective canned routine concepts. Step 2: “naturalize” those concepts to fit your personal approach and style.

Hey guys!

Last week, in response to a reader’s question, I detailed the pros and cons of using canned routines to seduce women.

To recap, the benefits of using scripted gambits are:

• You have well-thought-out techniques that have been tried and rehearsed by others designed to work at your disposal

• Others can try your routine, comment, add changes and tweaks. This benefits the community

• You have a working tool in your arsenal. You avoid talking for the sake of talking, and you can accomplish a specific goal with your words

• It can reduce your nervousness when opening since you have a well-tested routine or gambit that has worked in the past. You don’t have to rationalize for not opening because you don’t have a good opener. Now you have one

• Beginners especially can benefit from having clear guidelines for what works and what doesn’t in seduction. This is likely THE MOST important point

The cons:

• Even though gambits show you what to say, you may find yourself in a protracted interaction where you run out of gambits and are left with nothing to say

• The delivery can sometimes be artificial since it may not calibrate to you or your personality (probably why many men got seduced by the idea of “natural game” since it focuses on being more “you”). Guys can get stuck delivering a rehearsed script that mismatches the vibe of the interaction and the venue

• You have little flexibility; you end up stuck within the gambit

• Sometimes a magical gambit that worked 90% of the time will not work on a certain chick for whatever reason. (A dogmatic routine user would argue that you should learn more routines; a good solution, but it’s not the most effective, as we will see, and surely not the most pleasant)

• You may feel alienated from the material since it is not yours (the exception is when you create your own material, which more experienced seducers do, myself included!)

Last week I discussed these pros and cons while sharing some historical elements behind routine-based game and why it lost popularity.

However, I realized I did not present a solution to the problem. Is natural game the way to go? Or should you stick to routines? In my opinion, the answer lies somewhere in between. Ideally, we would like to gather as many of the benefits of routine-based game while keeping it natural. In other words, get the best of both worlds.

I want to present my view of “naturalized” game. I initially wrote a post titled “Naturalized Game” around 2008. It didn’t get much attention, partly because it was short and did not deliver anything mind-blowing then. I did not spend the time or effort to make a good, solid argument for my position. But I intend to do so today.

Note that I have stuck with naturalized game since that day.

Before I discuss what this concept is and how it works, I need to clarify a few ideas.

Canned game routines get a bad rep in the community since the natural game reaction. But are they really all that bad?

Hey guys. Welcome back.

On my second article about dealing with groups, DJM commented:

“Alek! Thanks for your great posts. Now that the mainstream pickup scene is filled with so much crap, it’s great that we have someone from the old school days still writing great content. I would really be grateful if you wrote a post about routines, gambits, and canned material. Nowadays, it’s taboo to mention routines or gambits in the community. You’re one of the few who still believes in and uses them. Please elaborate on how they can help – especially for beginners – and remove some of the stigma around them. Thanks a lot!!.”

Thank you for the kind words! Comments are what keep me motivated in doing the work I love: writing about pickup and seduction. So, thanks again.

Now, onto your request. As DJM implies, I think routines are misunderstood. What is a routine? In pickup and seduction, they’re ready-made techniques you can use as routines. The commentator is correct when he says there is a stigma surrounding them. It’s why we often prefer calling routines “gambits.”

In this post, I’ll discuss the pros and cons of using canned routines. Next week, I’ll explain my way of using routines, how they can benefit you, and how they can give you ALL THE PROS without THE CONS listed in this article.

First, I need to discuss some theories on why routines have such a bad rep.

It’s easy to get a big head because you beat an RTS noob or picked up a DTF girl. Yet a truly good seducer (like a good RTS player) relies on strategy, counters, and skillful pacing.

Hey guys. Welcome back!

Last week my post described how playing RTS games inspired me and taught me lessons over time. Today I’m going to take you through the second and final part of this series.

This series might seem odd to some readers. Isn’t the idea of writing about Real-Time Strategy video games on Girls Chase borderline geeky? Sure.

However, we are talking about strategy games, and to me, pickup and seduction is a strategy game of sorts. As I mentioned last week, it also comes down to execution (the distinction between micro and macro from the gaming world).

Today I’ll continue to discuss what I’ve learned from playing RTS games and how they apply to seduction. Due to the pandemic, I’ve started playing again (what else is there to do?), and the more I play, the more I see how my overall mindset has been influenced by my time playing online.

Last week I broke down the overall ideas behind RTS games and how they apply to seduction, and today I will get deeper into the subject and show how strategic thinking from RTS can help you become a better seducer.

Dominant, sexually attractive men take up space in their environments and touch the things around them. They look cool, comfortable, and confident where they are.

I was at the gym yesterday (my condolences to those of you in areas where they have barred your gyms and locked you in your homes). In between workouts I was doing my usual arm movements to stay limber, or leaning on equipment/benches for a breather.

I noticed a lot of guys in between sets would just kind of stand around, or maybe sit somewhere. The effect was I ended up commanding more of the space around me than these guys commanded around them.

This wasn't something I was doing intentionally. I don't really care if people think I'm an ALPHA MALE in the gym. The gym I go to is fairly hardcore and there aren't a lot of women there (so it's not like I'll be picking up there... though I do also like gyms that are good for pickup).

The observation got me thinking about something I always tell guys to work on with their fundamentals, but hadn't talked about in a while: take up space and touch things in your environment.

This is something that all dominant men do, usually without thought.

It is a very visible cue to a man's personal feeling of comfort in and control over his environment. You can just look at whether a guy is doing this to very rapidly figure out how 'at home' he is wherever he is and whether he feels like it's 'his' environment.

Women look at this too, and it influences their attraction to you.

Real time strategy game (RTS) and seduction have some surprising overlap. Success in both comes from strategy: both macro and micro.

Hey guys. Welcome back.

Today I will share an interesting but different article. I think it will be a fun read and quite useful.

I’ve always loved Real-Time Strategy (RTS) video games, like Age of Empires, Starcraft, and Warcraft III.

This article and its successor will focus on the lessons I’ve learned from playing those games. Plenty of lessons from RTS games apply to seduction. If you read through this article, you’ll see what I mean.

So, whether you’re an RTS nerd like me or not, you’ll find this a pleasant and insightful read.

Disclaimer: In no way am I advocating guys stack pizzas and sodas on their gaming desk and indulge in RTS games in their parents’ basements in the hope of becoming great seducers. That’s not how the seduction game works. Lack of socializing will negatively affect your success with women. You must still go out and meet people, especially women. There is no other way to get good at pickup and seduction.

In this post, I’ll share a parallel with RTS games that exemplifies the importance of field experience and actually doing it (playing in RTS games and meeting women in seduction).