(1) Beginner

We’ve all heard that most New Year’s Resolutions get ditched quicker than a guy expressing his undying devotion on a first date.

People tend to make glorious life-changing plans, then quickly settle into the same old routine they engaged in the year before. Of course, this leads to frustration, self-doubt and can even feed into a sense of perpetual helplessness as our goals crumble right before our very eyes.

Since nobody wants to live that way, and would rather see their goals met to build a sense of success and purpose, I thought I’d share a few, somewhat esoteric pieces of advice on how to make and set goals. While I won’t be delving deep into mysticism and magic, the advice I’m about to share comes from the latest cutting-edge research in schools of thought such as neuro-linguistic programming, the Hawaiian style of Huna, and from the Law of Attraction camp.

As I mentioned in my first article here on GirlsChase, you need a goal — even a destination — in order to calibrate whether you're moving closer to attaining it, stagnating, or moving farther away. So, consider this article a brief workshop on how to create proper goals, as well as an expansion of my earlier writings on the topic.

There are basically three steps involved in order to create attainable goals and do the inner work that is necessary to see them successfully blossom into reality:

Last week I wrote a post on what qualities women want in their men. The post covered everything from independence to dripping sex appeal.

But what if you’ve already got most of those qualities?

What if you’re a man who has a lot to offer, and you want to know how to keep a girl happy?

Or what if you already have a girl and want to know how to keep her excited and fulfilled?

Think of this as the corollary to my previous post. This is an article on what women like. It will cover the things that keep girls happy and wanting to either keep coming back into your life, or wanting to continue to be with you if you’re already in some kind of relationship with them.

Let’s get to it.

Much like Alek's article on the Secret Society, this will be a theoretical entry, meant to improve your understanding of large-scale gender dynamics.

Let’s begin with a definition:

The Sexual Market Place, or SMP, is the invisible battlefield on which intrasexual competition is constantly waged, in order for every individual to maximize the chances of passing their genes onto the next generation successfully.

Both men and women are in constant war with the other members of their respective sexes in order to fulfill their genetic prerogatives, which are to survive and replicate. This underlying warfare drives nearly all of human competition and progress in the world.

For both genders, there are only two ways to improve one's standing in the Sexual Marketplace:

1. Raise your own Sexual Market Value (SMV)

2. Lower the SMV of competitors
   

And that's literally all there is to it. For the remainder of this article, I'm going to point out common ways that each gender utilizes each option, highlighting certain social norms and forms of intrasexual aggression meant to facilitate those ends.

Let's start with the men.

It’s a question as old as the art of seduction itself: what do women want? Legions of men out there have spent long, lonely nights – following a rejection or disappointing night outing – pondering this question.

So… really, what do women want? Well, luckily for you, one of the things at the top of their list is a quality man. And what do they look for? What defines the men women want? Today I’m going to outline the 7 key qualities that all women (but especially the most high-value ones) look for in a man.

Desire: it’s that all-powerful word that differentiates a smoldering romantic affair from a chain of text messages that leads nowhere. The difference between having to fight to convince a girl to go out with you – and having her flake… to her flying halfway across the country just to be with you for a few nights. It is the difference between her always being “busy” and her finding a spare five minutes at all costs just to see you.

The difference is desire. Desire can make your seduction as smooth as ice. A lack of it can make it jagged as rocks. Desire makes dating, seduction and relationships easy.

But how do you cultivate desire? And what does it look like when you successfully use it to get a girl to like you? Today we’re going to look at desire inside out. And I’m going to show you the true key to understanding desire, and inspiring it in the women in your life as much as possible.

Street smarts are something that are invaluable to know, but that you won't know if you haven't grown up in areas that expose you to dangerous or dicey situations. You won't learn street smarts in the halls of a private high school or the sidewalks of an affluent middle class suburb. Instead, you learn them in the run-down, poor, impoverished areas where people keep an eye out for anyone who doesn't belong, just like you do in your neighborhood - only, instead of steering clear of people who don't fit the norm, like you may well, they come over to take a sniff or maybe a little bite.

Each of us has a different level of "protect" and "get" interests in other people. For example, if you see a big, scary-looking man, you probably feel nothing but "protect" instincts - there's nothing you can get from him, but he is a real threat to you... so you protect yourself, and stay away. If you're a single guy walking down the street and you see a beautiful woman, your "get" instincts kick in hard - you probably go want to meet her. Likely, you have some "protect" filter still up - if she looks completely cold or uninterested, you won't approach, because you probably won't get much from her, and you might not be able to protect yourself from rejection and losing face socially.

In less safe places, the people you meet have lower "protect" mechanisms toward you (you're less of a threat than the people they usually encounter) and higher "get" mechanisms (you're an easier mark than the people they usually see)... which means you're a lot more likely to get approached by someone you don't want to meet, for something you don't want to have happen.

Street smarts are really about raising people's "protect" shields and lowering their "get" meters around you, the same as that cold, aloof beauty walking down the street does with men who might otherwise be inclined to approach her - if only she seemed a bit more inviting.

I was talking to a friend last night who'd been railroaded by a cluster B girlfriend of his - a girl with borderline personality disorder (he hadn't realized until years in), which, if you're not familiar with it, is a real crazy-making personality profile that makes the affected individual completely mistrusting of everyone, causing her to undermine her long-term relationships by focusing on getting concession after concession after concession, wearing down the people around her and inflicting a reverse-winner effect on them that depletes their testosterone, willpower, and energy reserves and causes them to crash emotionally.

The silver lining of being around people like this, though, is it makes you realize exactly where your weaknesses are: it shows you the chinks in your armor that others can use to gain leverage over you, to whittle you down, and to take control of you in ways you didn't realize you could be controlled.

I've gone through it, and it's been among the most educational periods of my life - because what was previously a vague awareness that you were just a little "too nice", a bit too much of a softy, and a little too much of a pushover, suddenly gets thrust into focus as exactly how dangerous small weaknesses like these can be around people determined to get things from you.

And, eventually, it leads you to the ultimate realization that nice people need hard rules.