Pickup Tech

What is a frame war? This phenomenon occurs when someone seeks to seize control of the frame from you and you seek to seize it back.

Hey guys. Welcome back!

Last week we looked at the meta-frame and how to set it. To recap, the meta-frame is the “frame of frames,” a frame that must be respected and set to acquire the benefits from other key frames (social and sexual frames). This is the frame where you are the prize, and she chases you, which must be set and maintained. Every other frame you set must be coherent with the meta-frame.

The meta-frame positions you as the prize, and she chases you. All frame control becomes difficult or nearly impossible without it since the prize has the most power and compliance over the other, so that person will be the dominant one in the interaction.

Dominance is not about being a dick toward other men or acting like an obnoxious bad boy. It involves your ability to set and control the interaction's frames and having people accept them. That’s dominance. And women like dominant men, which means they like men who set and maintain frames.

The meta-frame makes her compliant to you – very compliant if strong enough. Yet something interesting happens sometimes: frame wars.

You are in a frame war when you have the meta-frame (she is chasing you), and the girl wants to turn it around and steal the meta-frame.

A frame war emerges when you both want the other to chase. Wars are always devastating, and the same applies here: it usually generates tons of collateral damage.

Today’s subject is frame wars and their implications. Next week I will discuss how to avoid them and deal with them when they occur.

So, first things first: how do you know when you are in a frame war?

Frames are easier to set with the right meta-frame in place. Yet frames feed into the meta-frame to. So how do you set one conducive to success with the women you want?

Hey guys! Welcome back.

Last week we went over meta-frames – what they are and why they are essential. A successful seduction involves the meta-frame to some extent; no two ways around it unless you get lucky, which can also happen.

The meta-frame is “prizability,” the frame where you are the prize and women chase you, instead of the other way around. More importantly, it gives you full control over the frame of the interaction. By default, this will allow you to lead the interaction and come off as dominant (and no, dominance, in this case, is not being the big tough guy who chops wood. We’re talking about social dominance with frame control).

The lack of a meta-frame makes most seductions collapse.

Imagine you want to set a social frame by establishing rapport, and you do so from a frame of neediness (against the meta-frame). You will come off as “try-hard” – trying too hard to get to know her.

Imagine that you are trying to get her to invest in a needy way. That’s a paradox since you’re clearly investing in her and not the other way around.

Now imagine you are trying to set a sexual frame without respect for the meta-frame. You will come off as sexually desperate and perhaps creepy.

You need the meta-frame, or else it all falls apart.

But how is this frame set? That is what we will discuss today.

The meta frame is the frame of frames. Learn to set it and setting other frames gets far easier.

Hey guys, welcome back!

Lately, we’ve been discussing frames in-depth, in particular social and sexual frames. A frame is a lens or point of view that affects the way participants in an interaction interpret it and how they perceive you. Your contribution to the interaction will have an impact on its frame, contributing to its underlying meaning.

I went to great lengths to explain what a frame is in the post “What is a Frame?” so I won't repeat myself. For now, let’s stick to this overarching, simple definition of frames and frame control:

A frame is the perspective and underlying meaning of an interaction. It dictates and defines the characteristics of the interaction – the couple’s social standing, role, and main features.

Frames are about “who are you to her?” and “who is she to you?”. In group settings, when you encounter social circles and night game, frames define who you are to each other.

Each action affects the narrative or underlying meaning of the interaction. They “set the tone” of the interaction. But each action also affects people’s perception of the receiver – your actions will define her perception of you.

The intermediaries between “actions” and “perceptions” are frames.

Actions –> Frames –> Perception

In my latest posts on frames, I discussed social and sexual frames. Social frames involve seduction, her internal reality regarding what she perceives as a socially acceptable or socially fit sexual mate. Your role is to set the right social frame – making her feel that you are a guy who is suitable to her on a social level (I shared numerous tools on how to achieve that).

Why is this crucial? It reduces many forms of resistance (like female state control, when she resists your moves so she doesn’t get carried away by a man who is potentially not her type socially), but it also generates compliance. It also serves as a good “security web” whenever her mood drops and her arousal fades. A bad social frame will make her regret getting carried away by your sexy escalation when that arousal fades. (“Oh crap! Why did I let myself get carried away by THAT GUY?”). According to Chase, it creates a higher floor to land back on when the effects of stimulation (escalation, etc.) fade. But it also generates a higher ceiling, as a social frame can increase her compliance level and allow you to escalate and set sexual frames with ease. So, it is a key aspect.

There are sexual frames, which put sex on the table, giving the interaction a sexual undertone, making it sexual. This is important to escalate the vibe, but it can also up her compliance levels. If sexual frames are set early enough, they help you avoid deadly pitfalls such as the friendzone and last-minute resistance (when she resists at the last minute right before you are about to have sex with her). Most importantly, sexual frames allow you to speed up the seduction and make it smoother.

So, both types of frames are essential to successful seductions.

But these frames aren’t worth much and will have a negligible impact if they aren’t coherent with what we call the “meta-frame.”

When you lock eyes with a girl and she smiles, it’s one of the clearest invitations you’ll get to approach. If you’re in the market for a woman or two, go meet her.

Ever look at a girl and have her smile at you?

It's one of the oldest approach invitations in the book, and also one of the clearest.

Whether she smiles at you first or you smile at her, then she smiles, if she holds eye contact with you while smiling at you, you've got a ringer.

I've used this approach invitation to identify girls it'll be real easy to meet for years.

I've even had girls I held eye contact with and shared smiles with do the opening themselves. There's something about that mutual locked eyes, shared smiling signal that emboldens even women to make an approach.

I've used this to prompt a fair few girls to approach me themselves in social venues. I would've approached them myself later had they not made a move, but sometimes once she's had that smile and locked eye contact from you she's going to dive right in.

One of the few times I've been street-stopped it was by a really good-looking 20-something girl in a tan business suit on my way to the subway midday on a weekday after we locked eyes and shared smiles. She was so forward it took me aback; I doubt she'd have had the confidence without that prolonged smile and eye lock.

A lot of guys overthink this invitation.

"She's just being friendly," they think.

"Maybe she's just having a good day."

"She could be smiling at someone else."

Yet the vast majority of the time a woman is holding eye contact with you and smiling at you somewhere, it is not because she's just having that splendid of a day, but instead that she likes you and would like to meet.

Set some sexual frames, and watch her become aroused, compliant, and hooked in. Sexual frames make a seduction easier – and there are 8 ways to set them.

Hey guys. Welcome back!

In my last article, we discussed sexual frames, what they are, and how they differ from social frames. If you want to learn about sexual frames, I recommend reading my previous post. Sexual frames help make your interaction “sexual.” They frame you as a sexual guy, affecting her perception of you. They guide the interaction between you and the girl to be sexual, giving it an underlying sexual meaning, since that’s what frames do.

Why would that be so important? Not only does it arouse her and put her mind on SEX, but it may also make her perceive your non-sexual moves or words as sexual since she will perceive YOU as a sexual being. It will change the filter through which she sees the interaction and you.

But, if you are not convinced yet, I will give a few more reasons why sexual frames are important – not just important but CRUCIAL. I will start by listing some benefits they provide. Next, I’ll present the main reasons why sexual frames can save you from a lot of trouble. (Last-minute resistance? Friendzone? Interactions that go nowhere?)

I will end by giving you some clues on how to set a sexual frame!

So, let’s jump into it.

A jealousy plotline can be a mighty tool in picking a new girl up. However, use it wrong, and you risk sending the woman you desire fuming off in auto-rejection. Follow 6 steps to do it right.

Jealousy plotlines are great tools for upping and maintaining attraction in situations where you can't immediately pull (or the girl needs more priming before the pull).

They set up competition for you between women. They get women laser-focused on you as the prize they're trying to win. And they preselect you to the hilt.

They are fantastic tools, used right, to pick girls up with.

There's just one problem:

If you're uncareful, women you run jealousy plotlines on can auto-reject.

The girl you want may decide you are simply too big a flirt... that you are only toying with her, with no real intention to escalate things anywhere with you... that this is just a thing you do with girls, where you suck them in for your own validation, then cast them aside.

More mature women will often just leave whatever venue they're in where they think you're 'taunting' them, and simply not reply to your messages after that.

Less mature women may try to 'get back at' you, by running their own jealousy plotlines... flirting with some other guy, touching some other guy, making out with some other guy, going home with some other guy.

But there's a way you can maintain a loud, clear signal to women you're running jealousy plotlines with that they are your prime choice.

You can keep yourself attainable, even as you leave women in suspense, wondering if they really will get you or not.

The thing you'll do is simple, but it sends a loud, clear message to the woman you want -- and causes the other girls you flirt with to switch into overdrive trying to win you over.

Sexual frames are crucial to taking your courtships out of the platonic. Yet unlike social frames, they won’t set themselves. You must set them intentionally to see romance blossom.

Hey guys, and welcome back!

So far, we’ve learned what a frame was in my post, “What is a frame?” We discussed how frames are internal and external points of view in the way we interpret something.

Setting a frame in a social interaction becomes the art of affecting the way someone perceives:

• A discussion

• A phenomenon

• Its interlocutors (you) and their role with the contribution to the frame

We have previously discussed social frames, namely the social aspect of seduction.

Women have an internal social frame. It’s the way she sees herself in the social world. These aspects play key roles:

• Social identity

• Social expectations

• Value system

In her selection of mates, she is more likely to allow herself to be stimulated mentally and sexually (and hence hook up) with a mate that suits her social frame. These include her social identity (socio-economic and cultural background), value systems, and all the expectations that stem from them.

When a man sets a social frame incoherent with hers, resistance occurs. Most likely, she will hold herself back from getting carried away by your escalation (we call this female state control, or FSC).