Dating Rules | Girls Chase

Dating Rules

Learn the rules of dating.

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Arousal vs. Similarity

Chase Amante's picture
attraction vs. connectionArousal excites a girl with desire for you. Similarity fills her with trust in you. Yet most men focus more on one than the other… so, what happens when you do?

In romance, many men focus more on arousal, while many others focus more on similarity.

Arousal guys do a range of things to excite the women they talk to, such as:

Similarity guys do a range of things to make women trust them more, like:

Both sides of a courtship are powerful, attractive, and necessary.

However, many men favor one area much more than the other, leading to what we might call 'lopsided seductions'.

I'll explain.

“20% of the Men Are Doing 80% of the Dating”

Chase Amante's picture
20% men20% of the men are getting 80% of the women. But are they? We play it out, going step-by-step, looking at all the numbers.

"20% of the men are doing 80% of the dating."

Such goes the conventional wisdom pumped out of the manosphere these days.

I have heard this statistic bandied about just about everywhere, including by guys in our own community.

It's ubiquitous.

However, I've never seen anyone actually work out the numbers on it.

What would a city look like if 20% of the men did 80% of the dating?

You need a fairly good grasp of the 80/20 principle (also called the Pareto principle, first identified in 1896) to really understand this.

I recently reread the book 80/20 Sales and Marketing, by Perry Marshal, a force behind the re-popularization of the concept in the mid-2010s.

First, I'm going to introduce you to how 80/20 works.

Then, we're going to put all the single people in a hypothetical city into 80/20, and we'll see what that looks like, and how closely it matches what we see in the modern sexual marketplace.

Tactics Tuesdays: Venue Mood Transitions

Chase Amante's picture
venue mood transitionsEnvironment has an outsized impact on mood. The right environment can almost seduce a woman by itself. By transitioning venues well, you can enhance a seduction.

How do you get a woman to change her mood?

The easiest way is by putting her into the right environment. Then you get to kick back and let the environment do the work.

Men create (or attempt to create) seductive environments for women all the time:

  • They dim the lights and put romantic music on at home

  • They take girls places they hope will set the proper mood

  • They switch from one venue to a more intimate one as things progress

Yet for all this awareness, a lot of guys have a blind spot a lot of the time to the influence of environment.

The environment you're in plays a BIG role on the mood of your woman.

The more seductive the environment, the less work you must do to maintain a seductive mood within her.

Thus, the better a job you do managing the environments you find yourself in with women, the more effective a seducer you will tend to be.

How to Deal with Women Who Flake (and How to Prevent It)

Guest Contributor's picture
woman snow flakeWomen flake for various reasons – not all of them having to do with you. However, there are steps you can take to avoid flaking… plus others you can use when flakes occur.

One of the least fun experiences in game is when a woman flakes on your date. You have amped yourself up and carefully planned for the date, especially if your goal was to have sex on the first date.

And yet flakes are unavoidable when you date multiple women. Whether you are learning how to use Tinder to meet women or practicing cold approach in day or night game, you will inevitably have a portion of your girls flake.

The problem is that guys often make mistakes when women flake on the date. These errors generally fall into two categories: First, they set up the date suboptimally, leaving the woman with concerns or other reasons to flake. Second, they do not react well when a girl flakes, ruining their chances of seeing her again.

Let’s break down the common causes of flaking, discuss how to minimize flaking, and explain what to do when a woman flakes.

Texting 101: Do Manipulative Texting Tactics Work?

Chase Amante's picture
manipulative texting tacticsIf a girl’s not responding over text, should you resort to “texting dirty”? While dirty texting tactics can work, there’s a better, non-dirty way to get a response than these.

A reader emailed in recently to ask my opinion on several texting tactics he'd come across. One was from a texting course called "The Scrambler", while the other is from a negotiation book that uses a tactic to force a "no."

Seduction advice often gets a bad rap as 'manipulation', even though most of it's not. I've talked about this several times over the years, including in "Is Seduction Wrong?" (also in "Do Bad Evil Seducer Men Corrupt Innocent Women?").

However, there's a kernel of truth in every stereotype, and the reason seduction so often gets classed as manipulation is because there are men out there who use dirty manipulation tactics.

They use these tactics because they CAN work... but there's a "but."

The "but" is that they don't work as well as superior non-manipulative tactics, and that even when they do work they tend to trigger resentment toward you.

Both the tactics our reader stumbled upon were tactics I consider negatively manipulative. I'll introduce you to them, talk about why they're negative, and discuss some alternatives in this piece.

Why the Best-Looking Girls Are Out During Daytime

Chase Amante's picture
day game beautiful girlsIt’s easier to get more attractive women during daytime than anywhere else (nightlife, apps, and so on). Why’s that so – and just what makes the daytime different?

Note: I'm doing a little series on day game articles, in anticipation of the launch of Hector's new day game course, Meet Girls Everywhere.

Looks-Money-Status: Has the Game Changed?

Chase Amante's picture
looks money statusThe world’s changed, and so has the game… for some men. But the changes to the game that’ve come to looks-status-money men haven’t come to all men. Why’s that so?

On my article about your opinions of women betraying your success (or lack thereof) with women, a reader writes

Hey Chase,

Ghosting, Part 3: How to Raise the Dead

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

ghostingCan you turn around a ghost, and get dates or a relationship from your ghost? Oftentimes, yes, you can. How? With these five (5) “ghosting turnaround” strategies.

In Part 1 of this series, we looked at some interesting statistics on ghosting that came courtesy a survey we ran on American men and women.

In Part 2 of the series, we looked at the reasons why people ghost on people, and what you can do to avoid getting ghosted on.

In our third and final installment, I'm going to cover your options to resurrect a ghost... and 'raise from the dead', so to speak, those contacts lying cold as clay in your phone.

This will include five (5) distinct ghost-busting strategies:

  1. Fun, High Value Invites
  2. Resurrection Texts
  3. Audio/Video Messages
  4. Passing Hints Along
  5. Running Into Your Ghost

Let's begin.

Ghosting, Part 2: Why People Ghost... and How Not To Get Ghosted On

Chase Amante's picture
ghosting reasonsWhy do people ghost? Sometimes it’s because of them… but sometimes it’s because of you. We look at the whys, plus what you can do to avoid getting ghosted.

Last time, we looked at the statistics of who ghosts on whom.

Ghosting, Part 1: Who Gets Ghosted the Most (Guys or Girls)?

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

ghostingWho gets ghosted on more, men or women? This ghosting study teased out the details of who ghosts on whom between American men and women in 2021.

Girls Chase ran a survey to find out who gets ghosted the most: men or women?

We looked at all ages and both sexes across the United States. And we also asked: how often do people turn their ghosts around -- and what's the outcome when they do?

This article presents the results from the poll... plus some tips on what you can do to reduce the odds you get ghosted (and turn things around if you do).