Articles by Author: Cody Lyans | Girls Chase
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  2. Articles by Author: Cody Lyans

Articles by Author: Cody Lyans

How to Be Social and Lead a Social Group

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By: Cody Lyans

Setting a good foundation socially can set you up to stumble across receptive girls and make the process of meeting new ones almost automatic.

social group

Most guys who are great with women eventually develop this skill as a result of developing their attitude and then naturally falling into it, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t take away some good things at your current level by becoming aware of some foundations of sociability.

I’m going to go over quite a bit here in bullet form, and then I’m going to give you a bit of a run down on why the points are key. Some might seem really common sense, others less, but overall you want to look at the big picture and measure in your own mind how you are addressing these points now and how that compares to something more ideal.

How to Break Free from Your White Knight Mindset

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By: Cody Lyans

white knightThe guys that eventually start to “get” women all have one thing in common: they ALL realize that being consistent with women is just not as simple as they thought it was going to be... and they step up to the challenge.

In this article, I’m going to tell you why the white knight attitude has to go, and I’m going to give you some clues as to what you should do instead.

First off, what is a white knight and why does it have anything to do with not stepping up to the challenge with women?

A white knight is the name given to a certain type of blind optimism, and it is a mindset that is very common amongst guys who are yet to take the demands of being good with women seriously.

White knight behaviours include things like:

  • Putting women on pedestals

  • Making the girl your only focus

  • Speaking overly intelligently (faking)

  • Taking everything at face value

  • Rushing to judgement in order to peripherally impress women or “hold your ground”

  • Pretending you are asexual (no sexual motives)

  • Posturing, or running an “impress the damsel” routine

  • Putting up strong barriers in an attempt to appear like you have good traits like honesty, faithfulness, infatuation, cleanliness, agreeableness, etc.

  • Roping girls into romantic relationships because they gave you some signals

Have you ever congratulated yourself for something you thought you did really well, only to later discover you actually overlooked huge details and what you were doing wasn’t even half as good as you imagined it was?

White knighting is a result of the same phenomenon. We think we are clever, until the penny drops later that we are actually messing up very important details that are crucial to long-term viability of our behaviour.

Appearances: Upping Your Looks & the 5 Guys to Be

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By: Cody Lyans

upping your looksWe’ve all asked the question “How can I make the most of my looks?”, and today I’m going to tell you a bit about how you can do that without adjusting your fashion sense or wardrobe.

I’m going to tell you how your appearance is impacted by what you do and who you appear to be.

Looks are not as cut and dry as model versus normal guy. They DO change according to your mood, what you are doing, and the chemistry you have with different people.

You should never just immediately assume the worst, and that you aren’t attractive, because things are much more flexible than we typically think they are.

The good news is, people will always find attractive things about you if you are being personally magnetic, so it is actually impossible for people to not find good things about you if you are engaging. The way to be engaging, summed up in a word, is to be self-positive, because the more positive you are to yourself the more positive your disposition to the world. That is something that cannot be faked, and therefore is an honest indicator that shows women the presence of the strong traits that they actually LOOK FOR in men.

This also works the other way, because objective looks nosedive when a person is in a bad mood. So don’t feel too bad for yourself; other people get a rough deal at times too, and you can get a good deal for yourself if you are diligent in your self-improvement and outlook.

How to Stop Overthinking It and Make a Move

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By: Cody Lyans

It is a common problem: you didn’t make a move and now you are stuck between a rock and a hard place where the girl loses interest and things start to fall to pieces.

make a move

So how do you keep that from happening?

Simple: you make the move.

Maybe that seems like a too-simple answer, and maybe it is, but if you can’t make your moves work when the occasion demands you do, then why sit around convincing a girl that “one day” you will be able to?

The truth of it is that if you can’t get it working at the start, you will usually be left with only one direction things can go: downhill.

If you can’t make up a good move on the spot, you probably won’t come up with a good move later... you’ll just linger around wishing you did something and get into a destructive thought loop that will stop you from making up a new move that would work.

The secret to not overthinking making the move is to realise that the action is first won in the mind before it is acted out confidently in real life. And it is won in the mind by establishing a habit of action. And if that action doesn’t exist, then it is won by having nerves of steel, and hopefully a creative spark that will take you somewhere.

How to Be a Good Kisser: 5 Steps to Confident Kissing

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By: Cody Lyans

Something that everyone I coach always wants to know is how to be a good kisser. How do you kiss so well, so luxuriously, so lustily, so confidently, and so well that your partner looks at you after and just says, “Wow”?

how to be a good kisser

Confident kissing is not only the mark of a man who can kiss well, it is the mark of a man who can win over women without need for words. It is little shock then that the way you kiss a woman can make or break her very perception of your character, and effect whether she will hang around or not.

It is a fortunate thing then that I am about to throw you in the deep end and drown you in the techniques that will have her begging for more.

I am going to run you through some aspects of kissing rather quickly, so fasten your seat belts and let your imaginations wander and do work! I will start with mindsets, then move to what is important: techniques to ensure you pull that off, and then advanced. I hope you all don’t mind me forcing you to keep up, but the way I see it, if you really want to kiss right, let us not mess around, let us get stuck in, and get those girls thinking “what a man”!

Why Girls Don't Follow Logic

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By: Cody Lyans

girls and logicIs it that girls are illogical, or is it that by worrying if a girl will follow our logic we forget to inspire them instead?

When it comes to girls, an experienced man knows that thinking outside the box is key to understanding the choices women make, and he embraces this fact because it not only affords her freedoms, but it affords him some too. Great relationships are built upon an understanding of why women need to be inspired daily rather than won over once and expected to then do as you do. Learn to inspire them and get rid of that confusion today.

If you are like most men, you have probably found yourself in this scenario: a girl has shown interest in you, and has indicated she will go out with you, etc., but then when it comes time she is nowhere to be seen or heard from. You call her later: “Where were you?” and she replies with something that makes no sense too you, given your prior arrangement: “Oh, you didn’t call so I assumed it was off.”

What?

To better understand why women do these kinds of things, you have to take on the attitude that accepts the behavior before passing judgement on it. Girls do things like this because, like you, they fear all kinds of rejection and making mistakes, but unlike you, they must consider the social consequences of how each situation “felt” and how it will reflect on them if they act on it. Girls do not reciprocate feelings and actions based on logic because the feeling of each action must be judged independently according to its context at that moment in time.

How to Keep Her Attraction Piping Hot as Long as You Like

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By: Cody Lyans

how to keep her attractedIf you are like most guys you probably have thought at one point or another that attraction is like a switch, and once it switches on it is on forever. But what might surprise you is that the reality is totally counter to your expectations.

The startling truth is that a woman’s need for you to keep her attracted is actually very similar to a thirst, and she needs it refilled every time you interact with her (not just once). If you are clever you will realise that the best long term plan – just like a thirst – will require a well to be dug and water to be pumped and delivered on a consistent basis.

Don’t let this image scare you however, I just mean to imply that attraction has to become a consistent thing that you uphold with actions every day rather than an objective you meet once and are done with.

Conventional wisdom states that once you “ask her out”, “marry her”, or get an “in for sex” that it is game set and match, but this is just simply false, and girls will ALWAYS change their minds unless you are consistently attractive. If you have a mindset that runs off the belief that you only need her approval ONCE, throw it out the window and change your view immediately.

In essence, women are much like any other thing worth getting right in life, they take passion and a great work ethic to do right, and once you adopt that “work ethic” you can consistently rebuild and maintain attraction all day long. So if you want to never have to guess again at IF she likes you, you have to set your mind to changing your expectations and go from a “set and forget” guy, to a guy that applies himself consistently.

Gentleman Escalation: Class and Sex Appeal in One

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By: Cody Lyans

gentleman escalationSo there you are, standing completely stunned. You’ve just met a stunner, and you honestly don’t know what to do.

She was gorgeous, and even more astoundingly, she left smiling! You aren’t used to that level of attention from such a hottie... so you start scrambling.

You start worrying about all the mistakes you must avoid when talking to her.

You analyse every future encounter; and, once you have gone through each one with a fine-toothed comb, you’re left still a little unsure - and decide to stay on the safe side.

NO!

Let me teach you that, you cannot play it safe as a gentleman: you have to have MORE guts if you choose this path, and accept that you are MORE likely to lose her than not!

You need to have more outcome independence, because being a gentleman doesn’t mean you will never lose a girl; rather, it means that you are fearless in the face of everything going wrong and remain calm.

A gentleman escalates not because he has a doubt in his mind of if the girl wants him; he escalates because after the time he had to think about it, he is pretty sure.

Let’s rewind though.

Keep It Low Profile and Get the Girl

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By: Cody Lyans

low profileWhen you enter a club or a mall or a party and you see strangers that you don’t know, dressed well and talking to people, it is easy to assume that they know something or have something you do not. These people operating on that “high profile” aren’t very likely to come up and talk to you, so it can be a huge shock if and when they do.

Their arms may slung around you and you stutter in shock, wondering exactly what to do; you are tongue tied; you can’t even think about anything other than wearing a smile and quickly getting out of there. Once you do escape they are left wondering where you went, but then quickly forget about it and move on.

Think about women for a second in this exact same situation: does a woman really want to be a part of that all the time - do you? Or does she want her sex life to be under the radar and personally suited to her?

How to Dance with a Girl and TURN HER ON

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By: Cody Lyans

how to dance with a girlWhen you know how to dance with a girl in a sensual, sexual, not platonic, gentlemanly, nice-guy way, you’re at a huge advantage with women in parties, bars, and nightclubs. Dancing is a socially acceptable way to be in a woman's personal space and allow her to taste what you are like without her having to fear judgement.

It even helps you to turn a girl on in a fast, simple, and relatively harmless (and very socially acceptable) way.

The only question is how do you turn such a safe act into a seductive one... and leave her wanting more?

You really shouldn’t aim to be a “professional dancer” in order to impress women, because skill at dancing in and of itself is actually rather platonic (i.e., NOT sexually exciting to women) compared to what a seductive man can do under the veils of it.