Articles by Author: Chase Amante | Girls Chase

Articles by Author: Chase Amante

Girls Flake Less as Your Value & Scarcity to Them RISES

Chase Amante's picture
girls flaking as a result of value + scarcityWhy do girls flake? Well, they wouldn’t flake if you were a super valuable guy they FEARED missing out on. Therein lies how to cut down girls’ flaking…

Over on the forum, we had a member report that a girl bartender he’d known a while agreed to go out with him, only to later flake, saying she was “getting to know somebody” and didn’t want to “drag neither him nor anybody into anything.” It was after all clear, she said, that his “plan to do something isn’t just as friends.”

In other words, so long as it’s just friends, she’s fine to do it with him.

If it isn’t, though, she isn’t.

Now, it’s possible the girl might’ve liked him romantically… a bit. These things are not always completely black and white. She was pretty friendly with him, and he talks about some lingering touch between them, being in a conversational bubble with her, etc.

Worth noting that all these interactions happened at her bar, where he was a patron of hers, and at one point met up with her there after she got off work for a chat in her bar. So all his interactions with her throughout were still firmly within the ‘customer frame’. It was only when he pushed to meet up with her outside of work that she excused herself.

So, genuinely attracted a bit (just not enough)? Or just a flirty girl? Could’ve been either.

I do, however, want to use this example to talk about the nature of flaking – and how dependent it is on the girl’s perception of a guy’s value + her perception of his scarcity.

Of course if you know girls who are in nightlife or other social venues a lot, you know they tend to be good at keeping things going with many different guys… good at creating this sense of closeness, of this feeling like things are gradually getting somewhere, all without actually allowing these flirtations to progress to the point where the girl has to put out or else lose the guy out of her back pocket.

Doubly so for girls who work wherever the guy visits them – they want cool guys coming back again and again, having nice chats, leaving nice tips.

If a girl likes you a bit, but not enough to definitely go out or hook up with you, the safest place for her to keep you is in that limbo where you simply do not know if she likes you as more than friends or not (sometimes she herself does not fully know… though she also might indeed know!). Then she can continue to enjoy you in her orbit, without having to decide to get serious about you or else cut you off.

However, all this flakiness gets much reduced as your value and scarcity rises in the girl’s eyes.

In fact, get your (subjective to her) value and scarcity high enough, and girls become significantly less likely to flake on you.

Tactics Tuesdays: The Room Check

Chase Amante's picture
room checkCheck the room you’re in to look for girls open to an approach – and other chances. The room check (or scan) can be a big help… if you know how to use it.

Here’s a little tactic that can serve as a gamechanger if you aren’t in the habit of using it yet: the room check.

Room checks are simple: you do a complete eyeball scan of a room to see what opportunities you can find. Get good at these, and you can zero in on girls you want to go for in just a few seconds of glancing around.

I should correct myself though – while the tactic is simple, you also have to know what you’re looking for to get much use out of it.

So let’s talk about when to use it, and what you’ll be looking for when you do.

Why Sexually Inexperienced Men Are So Clueless with Women

Chase Amante's picture
sexually inexperienced men cluelessMany sexually inexperienced men tend toward dogmatic, unrealistic views of women. Why is this so, and how do you get a firmer grasp of feminine realities?

Over the years, our staunchest critics and most vociferous opponents to seduction advice have been not women (many of whom say they like this site) nor sexually and romantically experienced men (who always find something they like here, even if they do not agree with absolutely everything) but men who are sexually inexperienced. Often it doesn’t come out until later in the debate that the guy doesn’t actually have much experience with women – or any at all.

They maintain generalities like:

  • “You can’t get a woman if you [some alleged handicap – aren’t of the same culture, are N years older or younger than her, aren’t willing to do some certain act like pay for meals, etc.]”

To any man with a modicum of romantic experience, the positions sexually inexperienced men hew so firmly to seem extreme, one dimensional, dogmatic, and unrealistic. The inexperienced man views romance as a caricature, warped all out of proportion with its reality.

He is, in other words, clueless.

Not every sexually inexperienced man is dogmatic in his certainty of how everything he has yet to experience in full works. Plenty of men are open-minded. But plenty more are not.

Why should this be so, though? Why can’t a man just read a few things, watch a few things, and know all there is to know about a subject? Why aren’t all men inexperienced in a thing open-minded about the things they have not much experienced?

Seduction According to the Tao of Steve, Pt. 2: Be Excellent

Chase Amante's picture
tao of steve be excellentTo make women chase you and deeply desire you, you must be better than other men. You must be, in a word, excellent. The Tao of Steve shows how.

Last time, we talked about the first part of the Tao of Steve’s trifecta of seduction maxims, be desireless.

People all want what they can just barely not have – and an attractive man who is personable with her but who for some reason she cannot seem to get to chase her drives a woman wild.

Of course, if ALL you have is desirelessness, it’s not enough.

Buddhist monks are desireless, but you don’t see women lining up to tear their robes off. Ditto for asexuals – no girl’s trying to wriggle her way into Mr. Asexual’s My Little Pony khakis.

Thus, we arrive at maxim #2 from the Tao of Steve: Be Excellent.

But not just any kind of excellent.

The kind of excellent that makes women want to rip your clothes off and get lewd.

Tactics Tuesdays: Framing Phone Calls to Girls in the 2020s

Chase Amante's picture
calling girls in the 2020sYou can and should still call girls on the phone – but mostly for specific purposes. There’s a trick to it, too: you must frame the call the proper way.

As phone calls have fallen out of fashion, guys feel even more awkward about calling girls now than they have in the past (and guys have always felt awkward about calling girls).

Calls have a somewhat more niche utility these days – but they ARE still immensely useful, and for girls of all ages and backgrounds… so long as you are using them for where they’re useful to use.

Like everything in seduction, however, it is all in how you frame things.

The frame you want when you call most girls nowadays?

One of amused mild befuddlement.

Are You a Girl-Closer or a Wheel Spinner?

Chase Amante's picture
closers vs. wheel spinnersSome guys are closers: they will bed a girl even if it gets a little tough. Many men are wheel spinners: when the going gets tough, they give up. But why?

A short while back I wrote an article where I discussed a forum member who managed to sleep with a girl who was in a new league of beauty for him, but only after overcoming five hours of last-minute resistance.

One reader commented that this was not worth the effort, and not what a self-respecting man with abundant options with women would do. Instead, such a man would simply leave and pick another girl up.

This mentality sounds like it’d be correct, at least in theory. Doesn’t it? After all, we talk about things like outcome independence, willingness to walk away, being the prize, and so on. If it’s too difficult, you should just go find another girl just like her it’s not that difficult with – right?

But real world practice is much different from theory, and things that sound reasonable on paper very quickly become unreasonable in practice.

In practice, you learn that if you want success with women, you must be able to close the girls you’ve got, rather than giving up just before the goal and going out to start the whole process over again seeking out some other girl.

The guys who give up when the going gets tough aren’t the successes.

Instead, these are the guys who end up spinning their wheels more than anybody else.

Nevertheless, there is a reason the men who spin their wheels a lot do so, too – and we’ll talk about that today as well.

Tactics Tuesdays: Embarrassing Stories

Chase Amante's picture
embarrassing storiesThe embarrassing story: told right it can build you up as it entertains. The secret to a good embarrassing story is a “triumphant subplot” lain within.

One big differentiator between extremely socially skilled and comfortable people and everybody else is the highly skilled conversationalist’s use of (superficially) embarrassing stories.

How to Pick Up a Waitress (Same Day or Later)

Chase Amante's picture
how to pick up a waitressTo pick up a waitress follow the four “waitress pickup” rules. After that, you have to DECIDE: take her number for later, or meet up at end of her shift?

They’re attractive, they’re flirty (especially if you’re in a tipping country), and they’re already talking to you: every guy wants to know how to pick up his waitress, right?

The challenge of course is that she’s in a hurry… she’s on the job… oh, and also, she might just be being polite.

After all, she meets a lot of male customers every day.

She can’t go out with ALL of them!

So how do you court a waitress properly, in the limited time you have with her?

How do you tell if she’s actually receptive to you, rather than just playing a role?

And if you can court her, and she IS receptive… how do you pick a waitress up?

Tactics Tuesdays: Priming Women as a Seduction Tool

Chase Amante's picture
priming women for seductionCan you shape the way someone views reality simply by priming her for what to see? Why yes you can – with this unique form of psychological flirtatious fun.

Earlier this month, a reader asked about ways to use confirmation bias as a seduction tool.

Confirmation bias is the phenomenon whereby people who expect to see something look for and take mental note of events that reinforce their expectations.

For instance, if I tell you, “Reading Girls Chase articles puts you in a stronger girl-getting mentality. Finish this article and go anywhere in public today and I bet you’ll notice girls are suddenly paying more attention to you. Why’s that? Read GC, girl-getting mentality.”

Now, if you do go out, you are going to have that in the back of your head. You’ll be more attuned, looking around more for women paying attention to you. That’ll cause you to notice more women who are looking your way, and your alertness will trigger other women to pay more attention to you, too, which you will also notice. So you likely really will get more attention from women.

Was it because reading this article gave you a stronger girl-getting mentality? You’re probably going to think so, because I told you it would happen and what evidence to look for, and you then saw the evidence – my prediction came true. Even if you know what I was doing, the part of your brain that makes connections between things is still going to believe it anyway.

See, what I did was to use something called ‘priming’ to prepare you to react a certain way to things I was fairly certain would occur.

This priming sets you up for confirmation bias to kick in later and reinforce my earlier primes – and you can use this effect with girls, too.

Advice to Stubborn Guys Who Do Not Get Results with Girls

Chase Amante's picture
stubborn guys who don't get girlsHave you tried all the advice out there, but women stubbornly resist to do anything with you? There’s a reason for it – and it’s not the one you think.

I’ve been involved with seduction for 19 years now. That’s almost half of my life.

I have seen so many guys have such transformative results from this area, and been personally involved in helping so many guys transform their lives, that I consider it one of the most amazing, life-affirming endeavors a man can pursue.

In seeking to better himself with women, a man comes to better himself across the board.

This area of learning attracts a cast of recurring characters. Each guy is different of course, but there are patterns of behavior that you’ll notice tend to come packaged together. When you see one behavior pattern, you typically see the rest.

One of these is the stubborn guy who had been at it for years but just can’t get results.

Often he has tried all sorts of things: he’s read books, watched videos, tried different kinds of approaches, met women through cold approach, social circle, dating apps, gone through phone coaching or even in-field coaching. Yet his results remain stubbornly unimpressive.

He may begin to fault women, the mating market, or the dating advice industry, one at a time or even all at once, for his lack of satisfactory success.

I write this article as an attempt to reach out to such men, to pierce through the normally unbreakable, impenetrable barriers around their minds.