Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad | Girls Chase
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  2. Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad

Articles by Author: Alek Rolstad

When to Switch to BOLD Sex Talk When Talking to Girls

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By: Alek Rolstad

bold sex talkSex talk is a tremendous way to set a sexual tone with girls. Usually going TOO bold with it is risky. Yet, in certain situations, “bold” is THE way to go…

Hey guys. Welcome back.

Last week, I discussed elements of strategic calibration when choosing between going verbal or physical as you sexualize and escalate the vibe of your interaction. It’s important to analyze when it is most beneficial to use verbals and when it is better to be physical during the interaction.

We concluded last week:

  1. Generally, in early game, if you opt for a sexual approach to seduction, it comes with pitfalls (Why You Should Set a Sexual Frame... And How to Do It), so sexual verbals may be the better choice. This allows more benefits, and fewer risks, it’s more powerful, and it facilitates later (and bolder) escalation.

  1. Often in the later part of the interaction, switching to physical game is ideal. It’s easier to pull off, more intuitive, and gets the job done. You are less likely to make mistakes choosing the easier option. And if it gets the job done, go for it.

Note that these are general rules. They should be a part of your default modus operandi.

But we all know that pickup and seduction is a complex field with many variables that affect each situation and alter your strategic choices.

So today we will discuss the situations when you should break the two rules above.

This is an advanced post suited for advanced guys who want to increase their meet-to-lay ratio. If you are a beginner, this post may be confusing. Learn to walk before you run.

The first part covers early game, where I describe situations when you should not use sexual verbals.

The second part of the post is when it gets interesting. I will make the case for bold sex talk and when it is far superior to non-verbal physical escalation.

Heating Up the Sex Talk with Girls: Verbal vs. Physical Escalation

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By: Alek Rolstad

advanced sex talk calibrationIt’s time to heat things up with her. But are you better off choosing sex talk for that, or physical escalation? It depends: one is safer, one is stabler.

Hey guys. Today I will continue the discussion of sex talk calibration. My two previous posts covered the basics of sex talk calibration, and this post enters a more advanced realm. So, this post is suited for upper-intermediate and advanced players.

Escalating the vibe and setting sexual frames, as we know, can be done verbally AND non-verbally (physically). But which is best? What are the pros and cons of each strategy?

More importantly, WHEN during the interaction would sexual or verbal game be most efficient, and when would physical game be the better call?

In an ideal world, you can choose between both depending on your preference. But we all know that we do not live in an ideal world. Many believe the choice of going for verbal over physical game, especially regarding sexual framing and escalation, depends on what you prefer. However, it does not. And this is what we will cover in this post.

It may seem appealing to say, “Why not combine them both?” That is, using both physical and verbal sexual game simultaneously. Two strategies = twice the power, right?

It isn’t that simple. Combining both can backfire and cause resistance if done the wrong way. If you want to know why and learn more about touching when talking about sex (verbal sexual game), check out this post.

Smoothly Bring Up Sex Talk with Girls (w/ Fractionated Transitions)

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By: Alek Rolstad

transitioning fractionationTo smoothly enter sex talk, it helps if you can slide the topic in with her barely even noticing. But how can you do that? With a fractionated transition.

Today I would like to share a transitioning technique with a very high success rate for smoothly getting into sex talk. I’ll go over the benefits and some cons; no worries, I will list and explain these. It’s an advanced technique and requires good conversational skills and control. Therefore, consider this an advanced post about a technique I teach my most advanced students.

We all know that transitioning into a sexual subject is great for your interaction as it sets a sexual frame and excites her. But it can be challenging to do because of the nature of the subject (women may not be comfortable talking about sex with strangers for many reasons, but mainly, it can trigger her anti-slut defense mechanism). So, there will be times when you try to transition into sex talk with whatever transitional technique you choose, and no matter what you do, it fails.

She resists, she seems aloof, she seems unexcited, and she looks uncomfortable.

If you encounter any of these reactions, the default rule is to quickly end the subject and switch to something else, as they can be forms of resistance. (But she may just find that particular sexual subject boring. However, act as if you were dealing with resistance just to be sure). It is usually best to stop talking about sex to let things cool off and attempt again later with a different topic and see if that bites.

The problem is if she shows discomfort with sex talk, then that likely will not work. Then it is not the subject that doesn’t interest her, but that she is uncomfortable talking about sex.

The go-to rule is that if sex talk doesn’t work, you should focus on something else:

  • Build compliance by showing mixed signals, demonstrating higher value, or using social proof.

  • Sexualize with physical escalation.

These are all reliable strategies in my book.

Forcing something on someone they feel uncomfortable with rarely works unless you really know what you are doing. You ideally want to use sex talk to get her. It has many benefits when it works!

For those cases, this post comes in handy. Let’s go over transitioning into sex talk with women hesitant to jump into the subject. It’s a bit tricky, but it’s not impossible, hence why this post is for advanced players.

Note that this technique will NOT work on women who show heavy resistance to sex talk. With them, just change your strategy.

Making a Girl Trust & Feel Comfortable with You (Seduction Gambit)

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By: Alek Rolstad

trust and comfort gambitBefore a girl will go to bed with you, you need to help her trust and feel comfortable enough with you to do so. How do you that? Use this gambit to begin…

Hey guys. Today, I’ll go through a gambit I love using in field lately. It is safe and low risk plus its effects are mind-blowing. It’s a two-parter, and you can use both in the early game to hook or solidify your hook or during late-game to escalate the vibe.

Before I get to the actual juice, I need to stress the points I make when writing about gambits:

  • You don’t need to know hundreds of gambits to get good results. It’s better to know some that work for you than many that work against you.

  • Ideally, you want a choice. Knowing many gambits is great so you can test different ones and select what works best.

  • Perhaps you have a bad memory or do not like memorizing gambits or canned material. In that case, these are still good for you because they serve as examples and templates for conveying attractive personality traits or set frames that make her compliant to ease the process.

  • Gambits can inspire you to create your own gambits or variations. I never deliver a gambit the same way twice. I likely deliver it differently every time because knowing the mechanism’s function and how to use it is what matters.

You can find the compilation of all gambits and related sex talk articles and guides in my compilation thread: Sex Talk Gambits Compilation (And more).

Seeding the Pull: Plausible Deniability

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By: Alek Rolstad

plausible deniabilityInviting a woman home with you is an art of itself. One part of this art is giving her plausible deniability. And one part of THAT is in seeding the pull.

Hey guys. I hope you are doing well.

Today I’ll discuss a technique that will increase your odds of having her say yes to going somewhere with you—whether it’s back to your place, her place, or another bar or location.

We call this extraction or “pulling.” It’s when you move a girl from one place to another. This differs from isolation and getting her away from her friends, usually within the venue, often in night game. Isolation can be challenging because you want to move her away from her friends. And extraction is difficult because you want to leave the venue and go somewhere else, often to your place, which she may not be comfortable with for many reasons.

Note: Isolating a girl and get getting away from her friends by bringing her back to your place counts as isolation and extraction (you can isolate through extracting). Both are crucial to master.

What’s cool is that the technique shared here is useful for both isolation and extraction. However, due to isolation’s slightly different nature, I will elaborate on how to use the technique in a future post.

The best part: this technique is deadly efficient and easy to pull off. It isn’t complex or risky; even beginners can and should use it.

Let’s begin with a recap (to go straight to the technique, skip the first section and start at “Seeding the Pull”).

This post is suited for everyone, irrelevant of skillset.

How to Persist with a Girl When She Resists You

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By: Alek Rolstad

how to persist with a girlGirls may resist when you seek to do things with them. But girls also say they like guys who persist. How do you persist with a girl the right way though?

Hey guys and welcome back.

After a few coaching sessions, I realized that I kept telling my students about an aspect of persistence that I haven’t discussed on the blog before, and it is an important one:

Should you tackle resistance head-on, or back off, let things sink in, and try again later?

In my many posts on persistence, I have advocated for “retreating and taking a few steps back” before persisting again. This advice is still valid. However, there is a nuance or an exception to this rule, which I will discuss today.

I will recap persistence and how to persist correctly before covering the exception to the rule and then explain why this exception applies.

We’re also going to talk about how to persist with a girl in two different seductive contexts here:

  1. How to persist with her when you are escalating things yet she resists

  1. And how to persist with her when you set a frame that she resists

Note: this post is advanced.

When a Girl Acts Disinterested: Just Walk Off… or Explain Yourself?

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By: Alek Rolstad

girl acts disinterestedA girl is acting disinterested. Or she’s behaving badly. You probably ought to leave. But should you just walk off? Or tell her why you’re bailing?

Hey guys. Welcome back.

Today’s post is a strategy clarification. I was chatting on the SkilledSeducer live chat in our forums. A member, Darkknight, pointed out that whenever I break rapport (contact) with a girl, usually as a response to her negative behavior, I rarely call her out on her behavior, nor do I let her know that I am leaving.

I just walk away without saying a word.

I posted about this subject not long ago: Confrontative Frame Control: When & When Not to Use.

Unlike me, he pointed out that Chase prefers the “eject and explain” strategy. It is similar to mine, by breaking rapport as a response to her bad behavior. However, as you eject and explain, you tell her why you are breaking rapport with her.

This is different from the strategy I advocate, as I say nothing and simply leave. I don’t tell her I am leaving, nor why I am doing it.

So, which strategy is better?

If you are asking yourself this, you are likely asking the wrong question.

Why? Because this question stems from a misconception.

I asked Chase for his take to ensure we were on the same boat, and we agreed. Is the choice between breaking rapport without saying a word and breaking rapport with justification (eject and explain) only a matter of personal style and preference?

Yes, to some extent. Chase and I agree they are two different techniques with different pros and cons and are suited for different settings, depending on the situation.

Which technique you decide on depends on strategic and contextual calibration, as they are different techniques for different settings, and achieve different purposes.

Remember to:

  • Calibrate to the context

  • Use the right technique at the right time

Tactics Tuesdays: Baits & Subversion, Pt. 2: Sex Talk Transitions

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By: Alek Rolstad

sex talk transitionIn part 2 of this series on baits & subversion, we get into sex talk. Use these baits to get women ready to talk sex… then subvert their expectations as you go into it.

Today I’ll discuss a simple sex talk transition that I use frequently.

Many men, especially the seasoned guys on our forums, are into sex talk, but one problem they face is transitioning into the topic. So, today I will share another way to transition into sex talk.

I have already shared these techniques for transitioning into sex talk:

How to Bridge Your Conversations with Girls into Juicy Topics

How to Transition into Sex Talk with a Girl by Using Proxies

EXPLICIT CONTENT! How to Sexualize Conversations with Minimal Resistance

And I’ll have more to come.

Most gambits I have shared contain transition examples. This is a continuation of last week’s post about using baits and subverting expectations to hook her in, stimulate her and facilitate those transitions. The concepts are similar to those presented last week, although tweaked for sex talk transitions.

Using baits and subversions are among my favorite ways of transitioning into sex talk, along with using proxies.

Like last week, you can use these transitions anytime during the interaction. Whether a gambit is suited for early or late game does not depend on the transition, but rather the theme discussed (light vs. bold sex talk) as discussed in part two of my sex talk calibration posts.

PS: Most techniques below are suitable for transitioning into sex talk, but you may also use them as transitions for anything—telling a story to convey high value or discussing a subject that conveys a good frame. See my previous article for details.

Tactics Tuesdays: Bait Then Subvert

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By: Alek Rolstad

bait then subvertWant a simple way to hook women in? Bait them with something that sounds juicy or provocative… then subvert their expectations.

Hey guys and welcome back.

Today we will discuss hook techniques that will immerse her deeper into the interaction and serve as a transition into any topic.

Curiosity leads to immersion. When she’s immersed, transitions are easier because she’s hooked in. Immersion generates compliance—she will listen to what you say.

Because of the “hooking” nature of these gambits, they work exceptionally well for early game when you don’t yet have a hook and have time for fancier transitions. In these settings, baits can be a shortcut to deliver a transition quickly.

Also, generating curiosity early solidifies your hook post-opening. You stimulate, intrigue, and immerse her. It helps you proceed smoothly.

Of course, you can use baits anytime during the interaction. It keeps the interaction fun and fresh. However, you get the most bang for your buck by adding them early.

Sex Talk Calibration, Pt. 2: How Explicit to Be

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By: Alek Rolstad

sex talk expliticnessThe explicitness of your sex talk is key. Too explicit, and some girls will be turned off. Not explicit enough, however, and some other girls won’t be interested.

Hey all. Last week we covered sex talk calibration given different contexts. You should consider the contextual factors when talking to a girl about sex. Today I would like to discuss how to calibrate how explicit you should and can be when talking about sex.

Today and next week, we will discuss transitioning into sex talk. As you know, sex talk helps with many areas:

  • Stimulates her
  • Sets a sexual frame
  • Conveys attractive personality traits like sexual knowledge and experience (sexual prizing)
  • Diffuses resistance with your set
  • Generates sexual comfort
  • Escalates the vibe

It’s an essential dimension in sex talk calibration. Combining this post with part one will make you a more calibrated sex talker.