Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

How to Have Sex with Coworkers and Get Laid at Work

Drexel Scott's picture

By: Drexel Scott

get laid at workIn the article on finding the woman you most want, a reader named Alex asks a question about having sex with the women you work with:

“The question is about getting together with girls you work with, I am young guy, working jobs at the mall to save up for school. I feel attraction from a lot of the girls I work with, but want an idea of how to transition it into getting one on ones with them. I want it to go smoothly, because I work with them and would see them frequently. So I don't want strain working relationships, but since I'm there a good amount time, translating this environment into my dating life would be awesome.”

Now here's a question just about every guy has - whether he's working at the mall like Alex, or in a cubicle-filled office building, or working in a school with hot young teachers, or running his own business out of a co-working space where he passes sexy secretaries every day in the hallway or anywhere else a man trades 8 or 9 hours a day for a paycheck and ends up face to face with intriguing women and intractable social dilemmas.

Chase already did a piece on flirting at work; so if you want a more enjoyable workplace environment or to enlist your female colleagues in some engaging, sexy banter, definitely check that one out. Flirting at work is also going to be a key to our strategy for getting to more than just flirting, which I'll go into a little later on.

However, we also promised a follow-up piece on having sex with your colleagues... and getting laid at work.

This is that piece, and I'm going to tell you just how to turn your workmates into bedmates.

Social Control and Moral Policing: The Level Bosses of Seduction

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

Video games have diversified as they've proliferated, and the variety of formats they come in has shifted tremendously over the years. It's not quite so ubiquitous a setup anymore these days, but at least when I was younger, well night every game punctuated the various levels of the game world with a "boss fight", where you'd fight an especially strong, particularly daunting opponent if you wanted to proceed.

In seduction, one of the boss fights you find yourself up against not so infrequently is social control, and the morality police.

If you've heard the term "moral police" before, you probably think of Islamist countries - Saudi Arabia, Iran... even the relatively "liberal" nations of Malaysia or the UAE. And while these nations have the only official (state-sanctioned) moral police (that I know of), the moral police in fact exist everywhere in the world, doing their part to ensure social control by policing the behavior of their fellow citizens.

social control

This "social policing", as I like to call it, is not so different from the rats of paranoid times - like clamped-down period of Eastern Communist rule, or the Second Red Scare of American McCarthyism. The only real difference is that, rather than rat people out to the authorities to win points, people rat each other out to others in the same social circle behind one another's back - or, they browbeat or shame them directly to their faces.

What makes this relevant to you, however, is how it impacts the women you're trying to meet, date, sleep with, and have relationships with - especially if you, or anything you're trying to do, is anything other than 100% "conventional."

How to Give Her Butterflies in Her Stomach

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

Almost one year ago, a commenter named Jo asked a question in "What Does She Want? The 8 Things You Must Ask Her" about stomach butterflies.

butterflies in her stomach

Here's what he had to say:

“I've heard many women say they get 'butterflies' around certain men, and that they feel 'nervous' around these guys. Somehow the thought of these guys makes these women's hearts 'flutter' and this seems to be something that (at least some) women want. I don't know if you've ever touched on this or not, but it'd be great to see an article that goes in to the social dynamics and psychology of the 'butterflies' phenomenon.

I haven't thought about this topic very deeply but off the top of my head and without any research I think the occurrence of 'butterflies' is a manifestation of one's anticipation of more good things to come. You don't know exactly what it will be but all you know (subconsciously) is...you want more! It occurs when you really like someone, and because they're unpredictable, you don't know exactly what's coming next. But you do know that usually whatever this person says or does is something that you find delightful and because of that you anticipate more good feelings...

So in the moments between good feelings you subconsciously anticipate experiencing more of them but you don't know exactly how they will manifest themselves, due to the unpredictability of the individual providing the good feelings. This seems to be something that drives some women crazy and they love it when it happens... It's all subconscious of course so they may not be able to tell you exactly WHY they like it so much.

So my question to you is, have you ever encountered this phenomenon of women getting butterflies around you? If so, how do you provide this feeling at will (i.e. what sorts of things a man can do to get women feeling butterflies and anticipation... and how can a man sense that what he's doing in this regard actually working?) It's one thing to try and pick up a girl, it's another thing to make them want to come back for more and more...and be out-of-control when around you...

Look forward to hearing from you...

Thanks.”

The "butterflies in her stomach" (or yours) phenomenon is a pretty common one to love, romance, seduction, and sex. It's a turn of phrase that's used to indicate the feeling of clenched anticipation for something desired one feels deep in one's gut; when she feels it, she's feeling nervous in all the right ways.

Giving girls exactly this feeling is one of the things I recommend you aim to do as much as you possibly can - that is, to give as many butterflies as you can, to as many of the women you meet as you can.

Of course, before you can do that, you've got to know what these butterflies are - and how they come about invading cute girls' stomachs in the first place.

How to Vanquish Fear the Moment It Crops Up

Colt Williams's picture

By: Colt Williams

Whether it’s the art of seduction, social prowess, travelling the world, starting a new business, or just picking up a new hobby, every man wants to be fearless. Every man wants to be able to take life by the horns, challenge his own hesitations, and take a step into making himself better.

But how do you do it? How do you overcome fear?

how to be fearless

Not just with jobs, not just with your social life, but with everything?

Today I’m going to talk about being fearless. I’m going to show you that you can transform yourself into a person who pursues his goals with endless determination.

Let’s go.

Preparedness: The All-Important Seduction Tool

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

Back in 2006, I had a date in Washington, D.C. with a beautiful Puerto Rican girl, who just exuded sensuality. I'd met her riding the metro one day, I no longer remember to where. Regardless, I was still getting my feet under me, and was pretty clumsy in how I ran my dates at that point - and this date ended up being no exception.

We went to get brunch first, and I decided to try out asking a girl to pay for me for the first time. I was a little nervous doing it... and she was furious. She got really upset. She was clearly insulted. She scolded me on how women in Puerto Rico never pay for dates.

But then she calmed down... and then she paid for us both.

preparedness seduction

After that, I figured I'd take her to the Barnes & Noble nearby, and we grabbed some books and sat down together. Her anger had transformed into raw, heaving lust... as will tend to happen when women overcome some staunchly held rule of theirs and cut you an exception, then continue spending time on you (complete surprise to me at the time, though). In the bookstore, she was soon leaning up against me on the ground beneath the book stacks, breathing heavy, the sexiest smile in the world on her face, and seemed for all the world to be puffing out plumes of pheromones into the air around us. Both of us were very turned on.

But Barnes & Noble turned out to be a bad call - and another sign I didn't really know what I was doing. Yet, rather than take her home then and there, I'd already decided earlier that I should buy her ice cream to even out the spending (since she'd paid for lunch) - yet another bad call. Things went from hot to lukewarm while we at ice cream... and then I finally invited her home to talk and relax some more.

I decided to have us walk from there back to my apartment - a 20-minute walk. Half way there, any last vestiges of desire had faded away completely and been replaced by complaining about how far we were walking and where we were going, and it didn't stop for the rest of the walk. I took her up to the roof of my building, which I hadn't scoped out carefully enough before, and we ended up sitting there in uncomfortable seats positioned too far away from one another. After about 10 minutes of rather platonic chatting, I tried to move her back down to my apartment, but she decided she'd rather just go home.

The magic was gone.

And I learned an important lesson: make sure you're prepared for anything that happens.

The 3 Big Benefits of Polyamory

Drexel Scott's picture

By: Drexel Scott

For the article, I am going to refrain from hammering you with numbers and statistics. If you're curious about divorce rates, child custody and alimony, that information is free on the Internet. I encourage you to find and digest it yourself, but that will not be the focus today.

Rather, the topic for today is going to be the two major forms of romantic relationships: monogamous, and non-monogamous.

polyamory

I will be offering you some insight into how each operates, as well as giving you some ideas about why I personally think that non-monogamy is the way to go. At the end, should some part of this article persuade you to explore non-monogamy, I will also cover how to go about it ethically so that there is no lying, cheating, or drama involved.

What's that, you say? Multiple relationships with no lying or cheating involved? Yep. I've been with more than my fair share of women, and I've never cheated on anyone - nor been cheated on - in my entire life. Ethical non-monogamy is how.

Emotion Regulation in Your Friendships and Relationships

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

The other day, on the article on men who seem to be naturally good with women, a reader wrote in to ask about emotion regulation in relationships, and annoyance at always having to be "the rock" for women he's dating and others when they vent emotionally, when meanwhile they begin distancing themselves or just decline to give support as soon as he turns the tables and he needs to vent.

emotion regulation

Here's his comment:

“Is it recommended to keep your emotional problems/issues separate from seduction?

Some girls (that I've known for more than couple months) seemed to have been of the stock where if I ever talked about my personal emotional issues (like the deep shit that you become aware of as you gain emotional IQ/mastery) with them, they gave me a look like how dare I speak about myself more than they talked about themselves...that's not how it's supposed to go!! Men, including lovers are people too, and have emotional moments (maybe a overbearing boss or a horrible relationship with parents or frustration from not being able to start a business or whatever). What I really wanted was for them to provide me with the value (same empathy/support) that I provided them, but they didn't really seem to care all that much...(it was more of a fake care, but not a real genuine OMG I feel your pain). Obviously they couldn't (nor volunteered) to really help me out and provide me with advice (even when asked), just an awkward silence then they turned the conversation back on them.

Have you ever seen this? What are your thoughts? Do you advise to keep have a support system separate and apart from seduction, and to not clue women into what you're feeling?

I am clueless on this. But maybe it's not women. Thing is I've seen a similar thing from my family too. Growing up, they weren't really equipped to deal with my emotional needs. Perhaps I presented them wrong? Conversation is part presentation...anyways the result was that I just kept shit bottled up inside, becoming aloof and not even recognizing it until much later. Now I'm more of a fixer, but it's really good to have someone around that says "i understand how you feel...try this." Never had that, not even from family.”

I replied; the original commenter replied to my reply to further clarify; Franco, the moderator of our discussion boards, weighed in; and the original commenter returned once more to contribute to the discussion again. All-in-all, it turned into a pretty thoughtful conversation, though clearly from parties who were coming at the problem all from rather different angles.

So, the question raised, I wanted to dive into it much further: what's the right way to go about handling emotion regulation in your interpersonal relationships? Or, is there even a right way - is there an ideal path? Or simply different shades of gray?

The 9 Male Identities and How They Affect You with Women

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

One of the pieces I promised sometime back was a write-up on identities, and the role these play in your social interactions, seductions, dating, and relationships.

Identity is a huge, important topic with vast implications for how you move through society, but it isn't one that's much talked about because it's difficult to conceptualize, and more difficult still to nail down.

identity

Nevertheless, having a grasp of what your identity is today, and what you'd like it to be tomorrow, helps shine a little more light on the direction you're headed in socially, and being aware of the different gradations of identity allows you to accurately pinpoint where you might be going right with a given identity, and where you may be going wrong.

So, join me on this journey through the looking glass, and let's examine the sometimes-strange and always interesting topic of your social identity.

How to Be Charming with Women You Meet (10 Steps)

Colt Williams's picture

By: Colt Williams

Being charming is a trait most of us are taught to aspire to from a young age. From fiction novels to Disney movies, the ladies always seem to swoon for that man who can charm his way right into their hearts.

how to be charming

But how do you get to be a charming man? And how important is charm in your process of seduction?

Today I’m going to give you a comprehensive look into charm. And it probably won’t be exactly what you expect. Charm is a double-edged sword that can be a great boon in certain situations, but a harmful bane in others.

I’m going to help you figure out when it’s most useful, and how to effectively wield your charms for seductions and relationships.

Sexual Economics: The Lover and the Provider

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

sexual economicsFrom reading the comment sections of my earlier posts, I saw that many men still do not truly believe that women love sex and seek it sometimes only for the pleasure of raw, primal sex itself.

I can understand why this is hard to grasp, as we often hear women talking so much about how they seek romance and love (and not only sex). We get the idea that women just want a boyfriend who can stimulate their heart... and not so much their loins.

Many men also believe that women are “okay” with having sex, but that women only have sexual intercourse with men in order to reward them for good behaviours.

Well, in my opinion, such beliefs are true... but only partly true. I will explain how women experience mating – what they seek in men and how their sexual behaviour can change drastically according to which men they are interacting with. I will also cover the elementary traits of these different men so that you can become the man you desire to become.

It is recommended but not required that you check out my earlier posts on:

By reading these posts you start off with an even better understanding of the concepts laid down in this article. However, for those who haven’t checked them out, I will recap the most crucial elements, as we dive in to how women think about sex and why it’s so that women use sex as a reward for some men... but seek it as their own reward from others.