(2) Intermediate

For the article, I am going to refrain from hammering you with numbers and statistics. If you're curious about divorce rates, child custody and alimony, that information is free on the Internet. I encourage you to find and digest it yourself, but that will not be the focus today.

Rather, the topic for today is going to be the two major forms of romantic relationships: monogamous, and non-monogamous.

I will be offering you some insight into how each operates, as well as giving you some ideas about why I personally think that non-monogamy is the way to go. At the end, should some part of this article persuade you to explore non-monogamy, I will also cover how to go about it ethically so that there is no lying, cheating, or drama involved.

What's that, you say? Multiple relationships with no lying or cheating involved? Yep. I've been with more than my fair share of women, and I've never cheated on anyone - nor been cheated on - in my entire life. Ethical non-monogamy is how.

The other day, on the article on men who seem to be naturally good with women, a reader wrote in to ask about emotion regulation in relationships, and annoyance at always having to be "the rock" for women he's dating and others when they vent emotionally, when meanwhile they begin distancing themselves or just decline to give support as soon as he turns the tables and he needs to vent.

Here's his comment:

“Is it recommended to keep your emotional problems/issues separate from seduction?

Some girls (that I've known for more than couple months) seemed to have been of the stock where if I ever talked about my personal emotional issues (like the deep shit that you become aware of as you gain emotional IQ/mastery) with them, they gave me a look like how dare I speak about myself more than they talked about themselves...that's not how it's supposed to go!! Men, including lovers are people too, and have emotional moments (maybe a overbearing boss or a horrible relationship with parents or frustration from not being able to start a business or whatever). What I really wanted was for them to provide me with the value (same empathy/support) that I provided them, but they didn't really seem to care all that much...(it was more of a fake care, but not a real genuine OMG I feel your pain). Obviously they couldn't (nor volunteered) to really help me out and provide me with advice (even when asked), just an awkward silence then they turned the conversation back on them.

Have you ever seen this? What are your thoughts? Do you advise to keep have a support system separate and apart from seduction, and to not clue women into what you're feeling?

I am clueless on this. But maybe it's not women. Thing is I've seen a similar thing from my family too. Growing up, they weren't really equipped to deal with my emotional needs. Perhaps I presented them wrong? Conversation is part presentation...anyways the result was that I just kept shit bottled up inside, becoming aloof and not even recognizing it until much later. Now I'm more of a fixer, but it's really good to have someone around that says "i understand how you feel...try this." Never had that, not even from family.”

I replied; the original commenter replied to my reply to further clarify; Franco, the moderator of our discussion boards, weighed in; and the original commenter returned once more to contribute to the discussion again. All-in-all, it turned into a pretty thoughtful conversation, though clearly from parties who were coming at the problem all from rather different angles.

So, the question raised, I wanted to dive into it much further: what's the right way to go about handling emotion regulation in your interpersonal relationships? Or, is there even a right way - is there an ideal path? Or simply different shades of gray?

Note from Chase: J.J. is one of our more esteemed forum members, pulling off seduction jujitsu with beautiful women and producing a steady stream of increasingly ballsy (and often quite funny) lay reports. He has an intelligent, laid back style, doesn't mind moving quickly with women or getting sexual with them in a hurry, and has a lot of great insights into the female mind that he's been liberal with sharing to forum members running into their own issues. Without any more ado, here's J.J.'s first post here on the article side of Girls Chase.

In today's article, what I'll be talking about are basic ways to get a read on how invested in you women are, and how you can escalate that investment very quickly with simple but very powerful compliance tests.

Using compliance tests has been one of the most helpful things I have learned from hanging out here at Girls Chase. Not only is the compliance test an extremely important and useful social tool, you should go to it early and often. With that in mind, I think a good way to kick this off is by focusing on the simple point that there are basically three ways that people interact and make impressions upon one another within a social setting:

1. They demonstrate their value levels
2. Indicate interest or disinterest
3. And they test for compliance

A compliance test is basically asking (or telling) someone to do something for you, and is something that I have noticed has been sorely lacking from a lot of field reports on the boards as of late. I believe there is a reason for that, since testing for compliance is the only action in the list above that really isn't done implicitly or automatically.

Whether we are trying to or not, we're constantly displaying a value level to those around us. We're also constantly displaying interest levels without much awareness of doing it.

Now, just to clarify, so long as you're not running around in autopilot, value and interest displays can definitely be controlled. What I am really getting at here is that you have more control over how you use compliance tests than you do the value or interest levels you display. I think the most important piece of information that you should take away from my brief into here is that testing for compliance actually has pretty profound effects on the value level and the interest level that you display.

The easy part of that formula is that simply by testing for compliance, you show a woman that you are interested in interacting with her. Also, for obvious reasons, getting compliance increases your value from her perspective - you become more attractive. There is also a third (and probably most important) benefit of getting compliance, and that is gaining investment in your interaction from the other person. When people take the time to do things for you - however minute - they're investing their time, thoughts and efforts into the relationship between the two of you.

This post has a very long time coming. I can’t count how many readers and forum members have asked about a piece on black guys having sex with and dating white girls. Well, finally… the wait is over.

Have you ever seen an interracial couple with a strong black man and an absolutely gorgeous white girl and wondered how that situation came about?

If you’re a black man, have you ever wondered how you can be that guy? Have you wondered how you can get white girls just as easily as any other girls? And if you’re not black, have you ever been curious?

Well, luckily for you, I’ve been that guy in the past. And these days, I’m that guy all of the time. So let me break it down for you, and show you the way to getting yourself some wonderful light-skinned beauties.

On a particularly long day, after an 8 hour drive home from Northern Wisconsin on vacation, I was feeling tired, and the day’s events had hit me.

When I got home I decided it would be best to take a walk around the neighborhood to clear my mind. I found myself walking without a direction or second thought as to what I was doing or where I was going, until… I passed by the local coffee shop, and sitting outside under a shading umbrella, at a table, was a cute girl sipping on a mocha frappe.

This girl caught my eye against my empty thoughts and, though I wasn’t very much up to talking, I wasn’t going to let the opportunity pass.

I sat at a table across from her, and looked up to the sunset, breathed in deeply and exhaled slowly as she looked my way and smiled. I brought my head down, looked across my shoulder at her, and smiled as I tilted my head back up to tints of oranges, purples, and pinks.

After a generic agreement on how beautiful the sky was, I sat next to her, didn’t say a word to her yet, but again saw her look at me, and this time I locked eyes with her, tilted my head to the side raised my eyebrow, then pulled back a tad.

She exclaimed, “What?!” and was thrown off by the gesture. After telling her that I thought she was cute, with a prolonged sexy stare, I ran my fingertips against the backside of her hand, and saw her pupils dilate and her breathing got a little heavier.

An hour later she was lying on top of me at the pavilion of a nearby deserted park.

That’s nonverbal attraction: the ability to communicate messages to and even arouse a girl without saying much - and it’s powerful!

Nonverbal attraction and communication lies at the center of most great seductions; it is the bread and butter of easy and natural pick ups; it is something we all know subconsciously; and it’s something you can use to skyrocket your success ratio… and today I’m going to show you how to use it.

We get comments and questions on here every so often where I see guys saying they think girls are still in love with them, then detailing behavior that makes it clear the girl is most assuredly not anywhere near being in love with them.

I see men chasing desperately after girls who want nothing to do with them, or have decided they're finished with them.

Men who want to know if girls still like them when those girls are busily dating other people and don't have the time of day for them.

So, today's article is not a "how to", nor is it even a "why it happens this way" (that much); rather, today's article is simply a what it looks like when you have a girl who's crazy about you... so that you can more properly judge where you stand, and how much work you've still got cut out for yourself in becoming the kind of man women go ape over.

If your girlfriends aren't treating you this way... either your relationship skills still need some work (there are plenty of ways to build your relationships this way - see "How to Make a Girl Fall in Love with You" and "Operant Conditioning in Your Romantic Relationships"), or you're not dating the right women for you.

The bro code; man code; man law. These tenets go by many names, but the fact is: every man should have a code.

A code that not only applies to the way in which he conducts himself, but also in which he interacts with his fellow men. Since there could be dozens of possible rules in the entire bro code, I've narrowed it down to 11 key tenets that apply to seduction.

This set of rules is not written in stone (yet), but I think it's a good set of guidelines to ensure maximum cohesion among men, and maximum satisfaction within the individual.

So here they are…