(1) Beginner

One big mistake I see a lot of men make when meeting new women is forgetting to allow for some mystery… a little intrigue. And a little bit goes a long way – it fascinates women, gets them thinking about you when you’re not there, gets them frustrated – in a good way! – trying to figure you out.

I'm almost finished reading a great book, called The Drunkard's Walk: How Randomness Rules Our Lives, by Leonard Mlodinow. Its premise is that all these things we attribute to skill are, most often, due to sheer luck.

My good friend David – who also goes by “Asian Rake” – made a point some time ago that set the gears working in my head. He said something along the lines of, “You know what I’ve realized all naturals have in common? They build up the energy of everyone around them.”

This was something I’d thought about a little before, but hearing someone say it outright hit me like a bolt out of the sky.

Guys with good jobs have a lot of good stuff going on. But, quite often, success with women isn’t one of them. Why is this so? For several reasons.

We had a discussion on the Skilled Seducer forum recently where we talked about how a successful career intersects with a man's ability to succeed with women.

I shared my experience, as both a guy with a good corporate job, then as a guy with various artistic jobs, finally as a guy who was unemployed, and then again later as an entrepreneur, and how I found women reacted to that.

Basically: good corporate job or successful entrepreneur are the hardest things to present yourself as if you want to pick up girls. You are much better off being an artist or unemployed.

I figured this out pretty early on and presented myself as an artist even when I had a well-paying corporate job at a prestigious company. I simply avoided telling women about this... well, if I had any kind of sexual or romantic designs on them.

Why should this be so, though? Why would women be more attractive to an artist, or even an unemployed guy, than one who's holding down a solid, stable 9-to-5 at a respectable, well-known company, or forging his own path as an entrepreneur?

If she’s hot, sane, never-married, and under 30, it’s good odds she’s never experienced major heartbreak. Why’s this good? It means you can still be her first real, deep love.

On my article "How to Be the Best Guy a Girl's Ever Dated," a reader named Lobster asks:

How many do you think [out of] 10 [girls] have had an exceptional man? And how does [this rate] change [as they] age? Thinking about it, however, the strongest are born already from young people and probably almost all who have had relationships will have someone in their hearts since when they are young they have a lot of time to spend together

I initially read his comment as "what do you think about 10-out-10 girls who have had an exceptional man", before I realized he was asking what portion of women on average have had one.

In this article I'd like to talk about why women hung up on their exceptional exes -- 'alpha widows' is the term that gets used for this a lot (I like this term; it has a nice ring) -- are not really as common as you might think, and why that means the playing field is wide open for you if you are (or are willing to turn yourself into) an exceptional man.

A quick pickup of a girl at a bar can seem like a gift from the sex gods. Finally! An easy lay! Yet if you are not that skilled with women yet, be wary of such “freebies.”

Hey guys. Welcome back.

In my last article, I discussed extended seductions—dragging out the seduction process for increased compliance and sexual tension. I don’t recommend this advanced technique for beginners. It is difficult to pull off, with room for unnecessary mistakes that could ruin everything.

So beginners and even intermediate players should NOT opt for such a strategy. Cases when extended seductions are needed are few, and same night/day lays, rather than dragging it out over multiple dates, will generally increase your odds of success.

However, I’m writing this post because this strategy has a few caveats.

Even though going for the same night/day pulls increases your odds, it is important to mention that this does not mean going for “quick pulls.” Instant pulls or same day/night lays are NOT synonymous with “quick pulls.”

As most men spend time around women, they grow tamer. What causes this effect? The answer is: women themselves… and their leverage of disapproval and approval.

If you look out across the broad range of men, you will discover men of all stripes:

• Big men and little men
• Rich men and poor men
• Attractive men and ugly men
• Stylish men and gauche men
• Manly men and girly men

... plus everything in between.

There is one thing you will discover that all these types of men have in common, no matter how they outwardly present:

Most of them, regardless the individual traits of their class, have been tamed by women.

The male sex is a sex particularly susceptible to taming.

A woman is never really tamed. She can be corralled, busied with tasks to accomplish, and made devoted to a man she feels she needs, but she is never tamed.

The female sex is the sex that does the taming.

The male sex is the sex that's tamed.

Yet, some men -- a rare set of men -- remain untamed in their hearts, minds, and deeds.

Why is it that some men are resistant to the taming of women, while most men, of all varieties, are so easily brought to heel?