(2) Intermediate

On the Girls Chase forums, one of our members named Godsninja shared a sticky situation he found himself in after getting an unpleasant response from a girl he’d traded numbers with and planned to set up a date with. Here’s the gist of it (full post here):

“I got her number and a few days later followed up with our date plan.

I don’t believe I got a text back from her, but I did get a text from another number claiming to be her fiance. Keep in mind this was several months ago, so I don’t remember how the text conversation went, but I remember I was very assertive, and after a few texts back and forth (finding out her fiance is a she), we stopped texting. I stopped texting cuz there wasn’t really a point.

It wasn’t anything serious, kind of awkward, but funny. It started out a little serious but I think I remember suggesting we all have a date together bahah.

...

I was sitting in my car a few hours later and got a text message from an unknown number (her supposed fiance) telling me that I’m an idiot, a stalker, and that she is “gun a go tell/call the cops”, so I told her to go fuck herself because she doesn’t know shit about me, and to come out to the parking lot to ‘talk’. She then reminded me that she was a girl, and I told her she would probably end up kicking my ass anyway. I told her I was really sweaty, and that I’m a good kisser, but I won’t tell anybody. She never replied so I sent a last text telling her not to text me anymore.

After the weekend I got an email telling me I had to attend a non-optional meeting with the Manager of Student Rights and Responsibility. I was reported for intimidation and sexual harassment.”

In this case, this was a pretty unfair situation for GN – he made his approach, took a phone number to set up a date, then got into a nasty text exchange from an unknown number by some person claiming to be this girl’s ‘fiancé’ whom he suspects was actually a female friend or acquaintance of this girl he’d approached.

When he ran into the girl again a semester later, he greeted her, knowing she was familiar but not knowing who she was. As soon as he remembered, he laughed about it, and, not wanting to get sucked back in, bid her adieu.

A few hours later, he received a highly confrontational text message – and then took the bait and got into a texting battle. In the end, the ‘fiancé’ (or whoever s/he was) reported him for ‘harassment’ to the university, railroading his focus and studies – he got off with a warning, but the instigators of the whole thing (the other two people) saw no consequences themselves whatsoever.

Situations like this are rare – you can approach 1,000 girls a year and something like this will only happen to you once or twice, maybe.

However, how you deal with such scenarios can make all the difference between letting awful people like this have a really bad, negative impact on your life, and preventing them from having any meaningful impact at all.

Hi, how is everybody doing?

Today I will cover some simple stuff – things that I see even experienced seducers mess up on. We will talk about some basic logistical issues in this post, and we will cover 6 crucial steps that will minimize your chances of messing up.

These steps are simple to pull off. This post is therefore well suited for beginners. But more experienced players might learn a few things from it too. Fact is, a friend of mine who has been practicing seduction for a very long time messed up this weekend because he did not have any booze food, or cigarettes at home. Most likely he was just being sloppy, but still, if he just had followed the advice in this post he wouldn’t have messed up.

The vast majority of people in the world operate under the belief that they are good enough. Since birth we’ve been fed ideas that we are perfect just the way we are. Doesn’t matter if you’re skinny, fat, awkward, or have a bad temper; it’s just your personality, and you can’t just change that. After all, we’re all unique – all 9 billion of us – which leads to the conclusion that there is at least one person who will love us unconditionally: our soul mate.

But, if I’ve found you here, reading these words, it implies that you understand that love – real, passionate, sex-driven love – is not the same variety of unconditional love that you receive from your mother. There’s something different about it.

Women aren’t going to want to sleep with you because they see you as their soul mate, they are going to want to sleep with you because you are attractive. It’s because you lead them decisively towards the bedroom, not because you are her one and only special someone; not because you were destined to be together.

However, understand this as you may, there is a chance that this knowledge has fooled you into being something that you are not. Those ideas that we’re consistently fed that we are good enough are hard to let go of, and in the face of action we often would rather make up lies to make us feel as though we are that attractive man who can lead decisively.

Which, in the end, is just another way of saying you are perfect the way you are.

You bought into the idea without even meaning to.

In order to relinquish control of the little white lies that you tell yourself, you must actively wrestle control of your ego. Yes, your ego, because after all these years of messages that you are fine the way you are, you must understand that something in you has to change before you are to obtain the results you seek.

Note from Chase: this article from J.J. is focused on a direct “how to sext” method that is different from and complementary to the more playful method Colt talked about in “Sext Like a Pro: Is Sexting Girls Worth Your Time?”

Before we get started I’d like to just point out that this article is geared primarily toward teaching how to sext your way to racy, naughty photos from girls for intermediate to advanced guys. It’s not so much that I think someone who isn’t on that level yet with women cannot pull this off, but rather that it’s easy to blow girls out if you don’t do it correctly.

If you’re at the beginner stage, or even just a hair past it, I’d caution against using this for the mere fact that you need to be making it as far as you can in each interaction so that you are able to rack up reference points and experience so you can improve with women faster.

Additionally (if you mess up while doing this), creeping girls out isn’t ever a good thing, and, if you’re trying to pull this off with women who live near you, there’s a good chance she probably knows some of your friends or colleagues. Don’t let what happened to Brett Favre be your fate.

Those caveats out of the way, let’s get right to this, shall we?

If you’ve overheard women talk about men who ask them for sexy pictures of themselves, I’ll bet the reactions they claim to have had weren’t very positive, were they? However, don’t be fooled by this chicanery; if I had to wager on it, I’d guess that about eighty percent of women (and a greater percentage than that the more attractive and mature she is!) possess at least a small-to-medium sized smut gallery stored away on their cell phones for this very purpose.

And, some would surprise you, as I’ve dated quite a few women who would send me nude photos all of the time.

If there’s a whole lot going on in your head right now about this... good. I’m going to answer all those swirling questions you have along with many more that you haven’t even conjured up yet.

If only a woman just saw you better and gave you that chance to say your piece you would have the time and motivation to do your best, right?

We all like to think we are pretty handy, when push comes to shove. We think that if we throw ourselves into something head first or are given the opportunity we will knock it out of the park. Sadly, the reality is that often we choke or let the opportunity pass us by out of a fear of failure. We don’t capitalize on opportunities, and we often even discourage them, treating them like annoyances to be purged instead of chances to grow.

We enjoy thinking of ourselves as champions who will come out on top at the moment of truth, but the reality is usually much more awkward, and the solutions are somewhat unavailable to ordinary perception at first glance, so we try to bury those opportunities instead of trying to grasp them.

No one likes feeling awkward or blind, so we try to suppress our fears of failure through negotiation. It gives an illusion of sophistication or thoughtfulness that is socially accepted. In certain cultures and time periods it is extremely prevalent; arranged marriages, cultural dress, duties, etc. And it is all arranged in a way that takes certain social status away from the woman to limit her options in order to make her more pliable. We forget that it is affecting her life in a negative way to unsuccessfully enhance our own.

Welcome to Episode 2 of the Girls Chase Podcast, with Varoon Raja.

Many men who learn seduction get to the level where they get laid, but very few reach their full potential. Why is that so and what can we do about it?

This article is only directly relevant for intermediates and up, but I would still recommend everyone read it. Knowledge about potential future traps enables people to avoid them in advance and do fewer stupid things to themselves and others in the future.