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Dating Rules

Learn the rules of dating.

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Announcing... The Carnival of Dating Advice

Chase Amante's picture

carnival of dating advice

What's a blog carnival, you ask?

Well, it's a regularly occurring collection of selected articles and blog posts from around the Internet, and because there isn't one in the pick up / dating / relationship space right now, I'm opening up one for business here.

Each week I'll be bringing you some of the best news, blog articles, and information from across the web on dating, seduction, and more.

What categories will we have?

Here's what we've got:

  • Dating Tips and Advice
  • Relationship Advice
  • Pick Up Advice
  • Sex and Seduction
  • Self Confidence
  • Self-Improvement
  • Product / Training / Website Reviews

Book Excerpts: Tips for Texting Girls

Chase Amante's picture

texting tipsThere's a lot of information out there that proposes to teach you how to text a girl, but the great majority of it falls flat. Guys post transcripts that don't measure up; or, tout as effective those conversational styles that produce more reactions than results. Thus, you go searching for texting tips but end up with nothing all that useable.

If you've read the advice on texting women you'll find on this site, you know it's both a lot simpler than what you'll find elsewhere... and a lot more focused on generating results for your dating life. We're a lot less concerned with making women like you than we are with making women actually get together with you.

Hence, these tips for texting and this selection from my eBook How to Make Girls Chase: Every Tactic and Technique You Need to Get the Girl(s) of Your Dreams, focused on reviewing the most important things you'll need to know to be truly effective in your text conversations with women.

What to Text Girls to Get DATES

Ricardus Domino's picture

what to text girlsThere is a phase that every student of the Art of Seduction goes through... and that is the FLAKE phase. This post is about what to text girls to get yourself through that phase... as quickly as possible.

You’re already advanced enough to approach women, get them interested in you and even to get their phone numbers… but they just don’t pick up the phone, answer your text messages or come out on another date with you!

This is one of the most frustrating experiences, because while you have the numbers of twenty beautiful girls in your phone, you might as well have none. They enjoyed your approach and seemed into you, but suddenly it seems almost impossible to meet them again, and they hardly give you the time of day.

I remember when I hit this plateau in learning how to seduce women myself. Now, I’m a real enthusiast when I want to learn a new skill (some of my friends might even say “obsessive”), so if I want to figure something out, I really dig my teeth into it until I have it NAILED. And I did the same with the topic of flakes, and text- and phone game.

Book Excerpts: Bad Dates You'll Want to Avoid

Chase Amante's picture

bad datesKnow one of the worst things that can happen (romantically, in any event)? You meet a girl you really like, things seem like they're incredible between the two of you, you both become more and more interested in and excited about each other... and then you take her on one of these bad dates and it all goes to hell in a hand basket.

That ever happened to you? If you're like most guys, you're probably nodding your head in sad recognition... ah, that awesome girl you met that you inexplicably lost on a bad first date.

But how do you stop this from happening?

Sure, get better at game: stop making the mistakes beginners make, learn how to get girls in ways they truly appreciate, and move fast and without hesitation. But there's another way too, and it's every bit as powerful: identify what those bad dates are, and stop taking girls on them.

In our latest excerpt from my eBook How to Make Girls Chase: Every Tactic and Technique You Need to Get the Girl(s) of Your Dreams, I introduce you to the primary archetypes of bad dates and explain exactly why they're so bad for you. Everything from long travel times to the party date - it's right here:

Tactics Tuesdays: Making the First Phone Call to a Girl

Chase Amante's picture

first phone callThere used to be a time when from time to time I'd get a girl's phone number, and then I'd never talk to her again. No first text. No first phone call. Nothing.

Making that first phone call to a girl felt like the hardest thing in the world to do. I was a mess of nerves every time I had to do it. And sometimes I couldn't.

But you never know which one of those first phone calls might be one that'll set your life on a different path. There was a beautiful girl I'd met at a nightclub one night in the summer of 2006 with whom I swapped numbers, and, thinking about it the next day, I was almost too nervous to call. I took out my phone, and went to put it away; I knew if I didn't call her then, I'd never call her. But, unlike so many other occasions back then, I soldiered on and forced myself to make the call.

That beautiful girl from the nightclub I almost didn't call answered my call, and ultimately ended up becoming one of the most important people I ever had in my life and gave me the deepest relationship I've ever had.

And, because I'd been so afraid to call, I'd been a hare's breath away from missing it.

So how do you kick your fear to the curb and get yourself calling the amazing women you meet? How do you get yourself bringing these women into your life, instead of wordlessly letting them slip away?

Well, I devised a few simple, but handy, strategies in the intervening years to make sure that first phone call goes as smoothly, painlessly, and successfully as possible. And I'd like to share those with you here.

Past Relationships: Where to Go (and Where Not to) on a Date

Chase Amante's picture

past relationshipsOnce upon a time, there was one subject that absolutely terrified me when women brought it up in conversation: their past relationships.

I mean, if anything felt like a death sentence for forward progress with a woman, it was her digging up her troubled past and spilling it all over my lap. Time and again, I found that my interactions with women ended soon after they began divulging their storied relationship history -- "Great, another gal looking for a shoulder to cry on," I'd think. "I'm doomed."

It took me a little while to crack that nut, but I did. When women start telling me about their past relationships now, it's almost a slam dunk that we become lovers.

How'd I make such a dramatic shift, from past relationships being a conversation killer to them becoming seduction rocket fuel? Well, it came about from me deciphering a few important concepts -- and that utterly shifted the way I approached women discussing their past relationships.

3 Essential Tips for Online Dating Message and Email Writing

Chase Amante's picture
online dating message
  1. Keep it short,
  2. Help her think, and
  3. Walk a mile in her shoes.

I don't usually start off a post with the impact points right at the beginning. But I want to lay these out first -- because they're so vital to solid message writing -- and we'll get into the "whys" and the "hows" in a moment.

I was going to write about something else today -- I have a couple of big-concept posts I've been meaning to write up and get around to -- but, heck, the last post I put up was a big-concept post so I figured let's have a quick breather from that and get something a little lighter up first.

This topic came up as I got to an email from a reader. A very well-spoken and clearly an educated guy, he sent me a message detailing a situation with a girl he knew... and boy, was it detailed. I mean, it was long. Really long.

I've been all too guilty of this myself -- sending super-long messages. And what I found was that I was often disappointed -- I'd put all this time and effort into a monster of a message, and then... I'd get no response.

There are a bunch of lessons I eventually took away from those experiences that I'll share with you today. The basic gist of today's post is, basically, that this -- what we're about to talk about -- is how you write online dating messages and emails that don't get ignored... and, in fact, get you exactly what you want: responses, phone numbers, dates, and success.

4 Ways to Stop Women Complaining on Dates

Chase Amante's picture

women complainA reader writes in a comment on the post about building emotional connections:

"This worked great with a beautiful young lady I was interested in. We had many things in common. She got presumptuous and began whining & nagging about her car repairs. I was a gentleman throughout yet she felt perfectly entitled to tool me!! How would you treat her inappropriate request? Oh I forgot to mention this demand was asked of me after the third date..."

That's an unfortunate outcome for our reader, losing a girl he had a great connection with to presumptuous requests, but it's all too common a scenario, and it's one that gives us an outstanding jumping off point for getting into a meaty topic: dealing with dating situations where women complain, try to get stuff from you, and push to use you.

For the relationship equivalent of this phenomenon, check out "Women and Drama." What I want to talk to you about today is dealing with this when it happens on dates -- and how you can sidestep, shut down, and otherwise flummox women's attempts to get favors and "gain the upper hand," so to speak.

I think you'll find it invaluable.

What Makes for a Bad First Date?

Chase Amante's picture

bad first dateI had a reader recently contact me, a little confused as to why a girl who'd seemed to like him had turned down the first date idea he'd proposed and counter-offered that they go golfing instead. His idea had been for the two of them to go swimming at the pool that she worked at, where he met her.

This is one of those things that, on the surface, in the moment where you're trying to think of date ideas, it seems like a great one: should be easy for her (she works there, so she's already there and doesn't have to go anywhere), safe to assume she likes it (she wouldn't work at a pool if she didn't like swimming), and it's fun.

But in fact, on further reflection, this is ends up being one of the great many bad first date ideas a man could have, and on top of that it's a very easy dating mistake to make. The reasons why this and many other first date ideas make for bad first dates are a little cloudy and a little hard to see until you're trained to look for them.

Today, I'm going to break out what those factors are that differentiate a good first date from a bad first date, and help you make sure you only ever have great dates (or, at least, great date ideas!) going forward.

You can thank me later -- when all your dates are awesome.

What to Do When a Girl Doesn't Text Back

Chase Amante's picture

girl doesn't text backA reader writes in:

I found something strange. Everytime Im having long interactions with girls in pickups on the streets, I bomb. I mean, she dont text back. It reminds me of Murphies law: If everything cant go wrong, IT WILL. I recently approached 10 women of which gave me attraction signals. They touched me, called me cute, called me the most interesting person, smiled, was high energy, stayd 20 minutes with me, and asked me to text them. I had good interactions with them and was smoothe and confident. I bonded wtih them and made plans to see them. They never texted back and I dont nkwo why.

I did another experiment where I cutted my interaction short about 3 minutes and asked for the number. Most of the shorter ones agreed on dates and texted back, and note, most of them gave me negative signs first. Is it because women use guys that they give fake "attraction signals?" Why do they seem so much into me at first but never bother to actually get into contact again? It happens over and over so much that when a girl give me signals thats too good to be true,I can almost predict that I will never hear from her again and Im alwasy right. I know it sounds counter-intuitive but I think the women who give you immediate signals are maybe time waster"? And what is your thoughts, do you find the same?

Brings back memories.

When I stepped up my activity levels in 2006, I noticed an odd trend: the women I spoke to for longer periods of time, and seemed more into me, ended up being less likely to ever return my phone calls or texts.

How bizarre, I thought to myself. This certainly doesn't make much sense.

But the numbers didn't lie. So, I did the only logical thing I could think to do: I worked to shorten the time I'd spend with girls whose phone number I intended to grab, and only spend a longer time with girls I intended to take home that day or night.

Almost overnight, the problem of girls not texting back and girls not calling back all but disappeared. But it still left me scratching my head a bit... why did spending more time with a girl and having her come to like you more lead to her falling off the face of the Earth and not returning text and calls later?