Articles by Author: Chase Amante | Girls Chase
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  2. Articles by Author: Chase Amante

Articles by Author: Chase Amante

Tactics Tuesdays: How to Respond to LJBFs

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By: Chase Amante

let's just be friendsSometimes you make a move on a girl and she hits you with "let's just be friends." Yet just because you got one LJBF doesn't mean you're out of the running…

You make a move on a girl or ask her out.

She looks you firm in the eyes, aaaaand... "I thought we could just be friends!" she tells you.

Just like that, the wind has sucked all the way out of your sails.

I guess you have to just be friends with her now.

...

...

...

I'm kidding. What point is there to that?

You're talking to her because you want her. Either to date her or to have a fun roll in the hay with her.

When she puts the "let's just be friends" (LJBF) frame on you, you're faced with several options... but not all these options are created equal.

Don't Talk About Pickup to Other People

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By: Chase Amante

talk about pickupYou should not talk about game with most people. It might be tempting to (especially when it's a major point of interest of yours)… but mum's the word.

This is a sort of public service announcement, mostly for new guys, but really also for any guy who gets a little 'game obsessed' and starts to spout off about game and girls.

In your day-to-day life, you will have ample opportunity to talk about women.

I suggest that, unless you are on a seduction forum or with a group of men whom you know are very much into game, you don't mention it.

That can be trying at times, especially when seduction is your passion.

However, you really are better off not doing it.

The simple fact is that discussing the art of picking up girls is alienating to 99.97831% of men out there, including many other men who like to pick up girls.

We talk about it here on this site, and if you read here often it might feel like a normal conversation subject, even. Nevertheless, for most people, this is a subject they do not ever talk about, and don't feel comfortable talking about.

So you need some rules around discussing it.

The best rule is, "For most people, don't discuss this subject at all."

A sound corollary to that best rule is, "For those you do discuss it with, tread lightly."

How to Be Attuned to Women and Your Surroundings

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By: Chase Amante

be attunedAre you tuned out while out? If you notice a beautiful woman, is it a surprise you were unprepared for? Here's how to tune IN (in 5 simple steps).

In my article on scouting for 'meet girls' spots, a reader named Kevin comments

Hey Chase,

From the articles such as this one where you talk about your observations of other people when you're out on the street, I'm always struck by how aware and tuned-in you are to other people. Myself, for various reasons, I got into the habit of being totally in my head and tuned-out whenever I'm out on the street; I'm also very eye-contact averse, with everybody. I don't look, or I break off immediately. The only exception to those would be when I take very long walks or do day game sessions. And since those feel so much better because I'm really tuned-in, this ability to really absorb your environment and be totally present in it is one I very much want to automate. My question is about your eye-contact. Do you shamelessly observe everybody around you, holding eye-contact with anyone who gives it to you? Do you use the overhead eye-contact tactic from the 'Elite EC' article where you only look at people who look at you? Could you please give me some tips on how to emulate your own tuned-inness to the people around you when out on the streets? Somehow, probably because of social control, I'm really shy about just looking at people and observing them shamelessly!

Many thanks in advance,
Kev

It's a good topic for discussion. Attunement can be a fleeting thing. It's also by no means assured just because, for instance, you went out to approach women.

I observed in that article that the vast majority of people you pass by in life are tuned out. They're lost in their thoughts, thinking about what they need to do that day, absorbed in messages or notifications on their phones -- their heads are anywhere but present.

The attuned man enjoys some distinctive benefits. One is that women notice him much more. Attuned people are in it; they gaze around, their eyes are wider, they're noticeably taking in their environment. Attuned people look for other attuned people, and a woman who's attuned will tend to very quickly notice an attuned man (and you'll notice her). Which women are most likely to be attuned? Those who have a reason to pay attention. Much of the time this means women who are looking to meet someone.

Attuned men are also more risk-aware and better able to present as hard targets to avoid dangerous situations. Very useful if you live in dangerous places (or venture into them from time to time).

There's only one challenge: how do you tune yourself in?

Because for most people, being tuned in is merely a thing that happens to them, on rare occasions, when the mood strikes, or when they chance into the right state.

But that doesn't have to be the case for you.

You can attune yourself directly and consciously, if you know how.

Tactics Tuesdays: Rewarding and Punishing with Phone Calls

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By: Chase Amante

rewarding & punishing with phone callsYou can use phone calls (yes, phone calls!) to reward women for good behavior – like good vibes and happy dates… but don't call when she's been naughty…

Phone calls are totally old school and no one ever uses them anymore. Right?

Well, the truth is men have always avoided phone calls as much as and wherever possible.

Back when texting wasn't all that popular and no one had messenger apps on his phone, guys still didn't like to make phone calls. They're nerve-wracking, higher pressure, and you can't sit and think about what you want to say -- it's all happening in real time.

Yet men who learned to use them then discovered phone calls were an almost magical way to bolster good connections with girls, repair frayed ones, and get out onto dates women who wouldn't otherwise have come.

And believe it or not, in the age of furious thumbs tapping out multitudinous messages, they still do.

On the forums, guys have repeatedly noted they tried calling girls (despite thinking it was out-of-date) and were amazed how well it went. Young women whom nobody ever calls, ever, get calls from guys and the calls go great and they lead to dates and hookups.

But this article isn't about whether to use phone calls or not use phone calls.

Instead, it's for that elite subset of men among you who already use them.

And the focus here is on how to reward with phone calls... or punish with their lack.

Boyfriend Framing: Serious Guy vs. Casual Guy

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By: Chase Amante

boyfriend framingJust because you use boyfriend disqualifiers doesn't mean you're totally out of the running as a boyfriend. Many guys still act like boyfriends… yet don't even realize it.

An issue I've noticed guys have over the years is they stumble upon Girls Chase, they read about not coming across as a boyfriend, and then they try to present themselves as 'not boyfriends' without actually changing their vibes.

Typically what they do is they add certain things to their conversations that they've read will push them out of boyfriend contention.

But then they don't actually revise the rest of their conversation to take out boyfriend-y topics and remarks. And they don't change their presentation or delivery style any, so they still seem like boyfriend candidates -- except now they're candidates who also say some slightly un-boyfriend-y things.

So let's talk about things men do (without even realizing it) that make them come across as boyfriend candidates to the women they meet... even while these men think (in error) that they are "coming across like the ultimate lovers."

How to Pick Up Girls During Morning Rush Hour

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By: Chase Amante

meet girls during morning rush hourYou'll see a lot of cute women on their ways to work in the morning. Have you ever tried to pick one of them up? Know how it's done?

Recently a friend of mine arrived in a new city and went out for day game on a weekday afternoon. He felt disappointed to find few attractive women. Yet we talked about that, and I noted that most of the good-looking women are not walking around town during the day... most of them are at work (or they might be in their classes).

I suggested he try going out during evening rush hour, when all the women get out of work. This has long been one of my preferred times to day game. There are a lot of great advantages to it:

  • Women are out en masse from work, all crowded onto the streets at the same time. You have a high density of approachable women

  • Because they're coming from work, they're typically not in as much of a rush as if you meet them on their lunch breaks or on their morning commute

  • Having spilled out from work, some of them are happy to meet a sociable guy who isn't as ground-down by a day in the office as the people they've been around all day; others are high on endorphins themselves after their 'escape' and are feeling good and happy to meet anyone friendly

  • I personally very much like professional women, and a beautiful girl in her cute little business attire is extremely fetching to me. It's easy to get excited about women dressed this way in my opinion (she might dress sloppy off work, but she has to look nice on the job)

Today's article though isn't about evening rush hour, which in many ways is the easier of the two rush hours to approach during. I'll probably do an article on that as well.

Instead, this article's on morning rush hour -- a go-to guide for meeting girls on your way to work... or, if you are like me, a sometimes morning-rush-hour tourist.

Tactics Tuesdays: Advanced Romantic Objection Handling with UNDER

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By: Chase Amante

handle objectionsWhat should you do when a woman hits you with a strong objection? Do you give up? Let her go? Or could you… address that objection, in a strong, smart way?

Something a lot of guys are weak at is handling strong objections from women they like.

We can roughly break romantic objections down into several categories:

  1. Token: otherwise known as 'weak protests'. You can typically ignore these altogether, or handle them any number of ways. These aren't serious protests, and she's more or less swayed to your way of seeing things already. You bring her close to kiss her, for instance, and she weakly protests, "But I'll get lipstick on you..."

  2. Tentative: she might object; she isn't sure. She'll throw this objection out to see how you react. You're sneaking into somewhere off-limits with her, for example, and she whispers, "What if someone catches us?"

  3. Standard: your run-of-the-mill objection. Not necessarily super hard, but not something you can always easily just brush aside either. Think "I don't go to guys' places on the first date" or "Shouldn't you date women closer to your own age?" There are already many guides on Girls Chase to dealing with standard objections (I'll link them up a little below). These aren't the subject of this post.

  4. Strong: a firmly-held objection she's insistent on. You tell her, "Let's sit," and she says, "I told my friends I'd wait for them here." You invite her again and she just shakes her head and says, "I have to wait right here." You invite again and again she says, "I can't move from this spot, I promised I'd be here when they arrived." This kind of objection is our focus today.

  5. Absolute: she walks away or blocks you. Absolutely nothing you can do when she can't hear you anymore!

Token you don't have to worry about, unless you're the most tentative beginner ever.

Tentative is easy to overcome with any kind of playful response or halfway conviction: "No one'll catch us, don't worry," or, "If anyone catches us I'll beat him up. Come on."

And absolute objections, well, nothing you can do there. You're not omnipotent. Can't talk to women who aren't around you and you have no way to contact. Women like this are just gone.

Standard and strong objections are the ones that trip a lot of guys up.

In today's article, we'll talk about handling strong.

Orgasms Satisfy Women; Lack of Orgasms Keeps Them Faithful

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By: Chase Amante

orgasm and infidelityThe more women orgasm from sex, the more satisfied with sex and their relationship they are. But the less of a protective effect sex has against other men…

It's actually a bit more nuanced than the title. But the title is not wrong either.

When I was a younger guy I was obsessed with making sure girlfriends had orgasms (as powerful as I could get them) every time with me. If I failed to make a woman I was seeing more than once or twice cum I felt like I'd dropped the ball.

I knew other guys I respected whose philosophies were "I don't really prioritize whether the girl cums or not, honestly. Sometimes she does, sometimes she doesn't." These weren't guys who didn't care about the strength of their relationships; they cared too. But for them, having the woman's orgasm as a "sometimes it's there, sometimes it's not" effect of sex was a lot more acceptable.

Yet as I've aged I've come more inline with my buddies views than my original ones.

I realized a lot of my original focus on "always make her cum, hard!" was out of a fear that if I didn't, a woman would become dissatisfied with the relationship and start to withdraw.

It turns out though that that isn't really the case.

It's not really the case at all.

Tactics Tuesdays: Expect Women to Approach You (or Signal)

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By: Chase Amante

expect women to approachGet alert, tune yourself in, and EXPECT the women you see to signal or approach you. Do this, and your fundamentals improve… and women actually do respond a lot more.

A year or so ago, I was talking to Ricardus (remember him?) and he mentioned a day when he went around feeling like the sexiest man in town. He just put it in his head: "I am the most attractive man in this city," and as he went about his day, women's heads turned. Ultimately a random cute girl approached him and struck up a conversation with him.

And when he told me about that, I thought, "Oh yeah, I do that too."

Most of my content focuses on 'outer game', because I think that's just generally easier for guys to focus on, and that the 'inner game' will catch up once the outer game's tight.

But there's a converse to this too: even once your outer game is solid, and your fundamentals are great, you can still slack off a lot when you're not in the right headspace.

Try this: wherever you are, right now:

  • Remember the last pretty girl who gave you a look when you were out somewhere. What did her face look like? Her body? What sort of signs of interest did she give you?

  • Remember the last time you felt like you were on top of the world. Was it just after you got out of the gym? Just grabbed a number from a new girl or rolled in the hay with one? Had some other kind of victory?

  • Remember that when a man walks and acts in a confident way, everyone around him views him as a confident man. Perception is reality, in this case

  • Now, with those three things in mind, remind yourself that you are actually a pretty desirable guy

What happens to your fundamentals when you do this?

Do you straighten your posture up more?

Puff your chest out a bit?

Give your head a more confident tilt?

Open your eyes a bit wider, and become more alert?

Most likely you did these things, plus a host of other small things.

And all those small things add up together to make you stand out in a noticeable way from all the other people around you.

Scouting for Meet Girls Spots: You Just Have to Go There

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By: Chase Amante

scouting to meet new girlsEver try to predict how good a place will be to meet girls by looking at a map or talking to people? If you have, you'll know how wrong you often get it. But… why?

I like to regularly scout new spots. Keeps things fresh, and you don't know what you'll find -- either in the place, or in the woman situation (see: new spot bonus).

The other day I decided to work at a shopping mall in one of the university areas. I walked by the women's university, where school's just about to be back in session, with cars unloading female college students and their suitcases and belongings. Then I found the nearby mall and took a stroll through it.

And... I was surprised how few single women there were there.

There were lots of families. Lots of children. A few couples and trios of college girls. Next to none there alone. And of the women who were there, only a handful were very attractive.

The mall had multiple floors, but only two options to work at, a Starbucks on the first floor and a tea place on one of the upper floors. The tea place actually looked like the better bet as far as clientele, but I opted for the Starbucks to get a clearer idea about the mall's foot traffic.

In the several hours I spent there, I saw perhaps a handful of attractive women, solo, walk by. The rest were all couples, trios, and families. Most of the women I saw did not have attractive faces (if unmasked) and/or didn't have the best bodies.

Where were all the attractive solo girls?