Phone / Text / Email | Girls Chase

Phone / Text / Email

Tips and tactics on being successful with women using the mediums of telephone, email, and text-messaging.

Tactics Tuesdays: When She Texts You "We'll See"

she texts maybe or we'll see
When she texts you “maybe” or “we’ll see”, what does it mean? Why do women text this? There are ways to reduce this happening – as well as ways to deal with it once it happens.

A reader named Daniel writes in:

Hey guys,

I have been gaming for a few years now, and I notice a theme. When I ask a girl to hangout via text, there are certain responses that women commonly give- and I consider them all to be negative. We’ll be texting each other, and when I ask her to hangout or suggest it she will either say: “We’ll see”; “I’ll let you know “; “maybe ; or go silent. Obviously, I get some positive responses, but any variation of these 4 tends to be the common negative ones. Any tips on how to respond to each? Or better yet, could you write an article on girls responding negatively or questionably when u ask them to hangout via text?

Ooh, yeah. That’s an ugly message to get:

  • “Maybe”
  • “I’ll let you know”
  • “We’ll see”

These texts always suck. They suck for one major reason: the girl implies she holds all the cards.

This is not a gracious message. When she texts you “maybe” or she texts you “we’ll see” it is an “I’m-going-to-tell-you-how-it-will-be-and-you-will-be-waiting” message. Each of the above responses implies you want something, and she will decide later whether you will get the thing you want or not.

In this article, we’ll talk about some firefighting tactics you can use if you get this. But more importantly, we’ll talk about why women send this message in the first place, and the ways you can avoid ever even getting this message (most of the time).

How to Respond When She Only Sends You an Emoji (Video)

Have you ever had a girl respond to one of your texts with only an emoji? As with texting, and anything related to women, the context is important. But if she ONLY sends you an emoji, here's a good analysis of how to form a response.

If you do it correctly, you can sometimes get her to follow up and put more effort into the conversation.

Tactics Tuesdays: 10 Times to Call Her Instead of Text

call her instead of text
10 times to give her a phone call instead of send her a text: when her text replies are bland, when she’s a slow text responder, when it’s logistically easier, and more.

We have a cool discussion on the forum right now where one of our members (Big Daddy) chronicles his foray into making phone calls to girls. He began to mix phone calls into his follow-up repertoire after a few of our articles on phone calls here. He was new to calls at the start of the thread, but once past those early jitters he discovered phone calls suit him:

Even if it doesn’t work out this already works so much better than texting. I mean my calling skills are 2/10 at the moment and I feel like I have 30x more leverage on calls. I’m actually having fun doing this “just for reps.”

In honor of this discussion Big Daddy kicked off, I thought I’d put together a list of the best times to call a girl... instead of send her a text.

Our occasions to call instead of text fall into a few key themes:

  • When you need to inject life into the courtship

  • When texting is inefficient or doesn’t work

  • When you need to cover a lot of ground in a short time (like to rebuild a connection, or fix a screw-up)

To help make the right times to call clearer, I’ve split these overarching themes up into 10 distinct scenarios.

Our first is when your initial meet was only lukewarm.

Stop Making These 5 Texting Mistakes with Girls You Just Met

texting mistakes
Social texting, text message negs, and asking her to answer quicker are a few common texting mistakes you’d do well to avoid.

These days, texting – or the various flavors of instant messaging – has clearly taken over as the preferred form of communication to get newly-met girls on dates and into bed. So much so that many seek out articles, books, and coaches to help them master the art.

Ten years ago, it was perfectly legit to call a girl you just met and set up a meet over the phone. The phone used to be a great tool, because you could show her how cool of a guy you are through voice tonality, which is still a fundamental art for in-person interactions (which is why setting up a meet should be your primary goal when texting). It used to be that I’d turn cold numbers warm through good phone calls – but those days are gone for the most part.

You’d think showcasing good voice tonality over the phone would go a long way when meeting someone new, but if you call a new girl nowadays, she most likely won’t even answer, because she’s not comfortable talking to strangers. The only person who actually calls her on the phone and gets picked up is probably her mom. In other words, you could have a very sexy voice, but if she doesn’t answer the phone, well, I guess you could leave a voicemail and hope for the best. But she’ll probably still think you’re weird for calling. “Dude, voicemail? Who does that? Why doesn’t he just text? Weirdo.”

Like it or not, people now prefer text communication for contacting new people, even when a two-minute call could accomplish the same thing as several texts over the course of hours. Whether or not people realize texting is most often less efficient, it’s always more comfortable, non-confrontational, and safe. So that’s what we do now.

The problem is that a lot of communication cues are lost in written text, even with the use of emojis. And it is more important now to convey your coolness through text than it ever was. Even if you’re just trying to get a date with a hot girl you met during night game or day game, the tool required to get to meet her again face to face is called “text game.”

Many dudes have not connected the dots between having a horrible text game and having very few dates. Ask any guy who is decently good with girls, and they’ll tell you there is a clear correlation between text game and actually getting girls close enough to you for sex to happen. But what is good text game? We have several articles that deal with that. In this post, I want to give you guys some additional pointers on how to avoid bad text game.

Okay, guys. Take notes, and don’t do this stuff.

Should You Regularly Ping Text Girls Who've Eluded Your Dates?

ping girls for dates
If she eludes your dates, it can feel tempting to ping her regularly to make sure she doesn’t forget you. Yet there are better follow-up strategies than this.

A reader writes in:

Chase,

First off, I really value your dating advice; it’s rooted in logic and psychology and that’s how I operate.  It resonates in a big way with me.

So my scenario/question...

There is this one girl.

I’ve known her for about 2 years, but we never hooked up because one of us has always been in a relationship.  I own an organic juice bar and she actually came into the store the other day.  Attraction was definitely strong and she extended her number to me.

We went on a date a few days later; local, food, drinks and just established rapport and comfort.  Of course my end game was to get intimate with her, but it didn’t happen.  I was sort of bummed.  No good night kiss?  I can’t remember the last time that happened.  After the date we texted and I asked if I could call her and I did.  We basically stayed on the phone for almost 2 hours, sort of continuing the date convo.

I asked her on the phone, “Why no kiss?”.  She mentioned that she is shy, that she is attracted to me, the fact that I was on antibiotics for strep throat (day 6) bothered her a bit.  We also talked about how she is a bit messed up from an ex and that recently, she was actually falling for someone hard and chased him but it didn’t work out because he doesn’t want a girlfriend.

I’ve been trying to set up date 2 but it hasn’t happened yet.  I’m just keeping the texts short, direct, nonchalant, non predictable non needy, etc.

I really think she is just hung up on this guy (the one she was recently intimate with and doesn’t want a girlfriend) and after some time I’ll be able to meet her again and put the moves on her.  I’m confident once we’re intimate she will be chasing me.

However, I am by no means not seeing other girls.  I always keep about 3-4 in the rotation so I’m not lonely on a Thursday, Friday, or Saturday night.

MY QUESTION – Texting is such low effort as is Instagram and DM and things of that nature.  Is it ok to use these methods once in awhile to keep a “girl in the loop”?  I feel that timing is everything sometimes and this may be a method to grab her attention at the most opportune time.  What are your thoughts on this?  I’m not sitting home pining over her.  I just feel like the end goal is so close within reach and don’t want to completely give up.  If this is a viable method for achieving my end goal what would you recommend?  Frequency, context, things of that nature?

Thanks you for you time!

This is a great question. You get some progress with a girl, it feels like it’s close, but then it doesn’t happen. She doesn’t come out on dates, but she still responds to your messages.

So the question is: do you ping her from time to time to see if she’s available and changed her mind? Or do you not? And if you do, how often?

As You Get Older, Should You Date Women Who Want to Reconnect?

girls who want to reconnect
It’s been years… and now she wants to reconnect. Should you meet her? And beyond that, should you date her?

I received an email recently from a girl I hadn’t heard from in six or seven years.

I’d known her from social circle (back when I still maintained a social circle). She was skinny, fun, and cute, with an endearing California Valley girl accent (and all the expressiveness that entails). She also had that somewhat uptight air about her that can be a little off-putting but is really fun when you break through it and reach the real her.

Anyway, this was not a girl I’d hooked up with. Didn’t really have a good opportunity, and in any event I slept with other girls from that circle who were younger and didn’t have the same walls up she did. I met up with her various times in our shared social circle. Toward the end of my time in that circle, I scheduled a one-on-one meet with her but had to flake on it... and when she wanted to meet again I wasn’t able to make myself available for it. And after that we were in different cities and she fell off my radar. She was 29 years old back then.

So I got an email from her after more than half a decade, just saying she saw an event and wondered if I intended to go to it and asking if I was in town.

And the only thing I could think was, “Wow, 36 years old and still single, huh?”

Tactics Tuesdays: The Friday/Saturday Night Date

Friday night date
The Friday night or Saturday night date is one of the best date times you can get. But it’s also tricky to get – she may have plans, or want you to think she does.

You know my usual advice on scheduling your dates... go for midday if you can (11 AM start time), when she’s likely to have the whole day free. Or if you can’t, after 7 PM Monday through Thursday is good.

But avoid Friday and Saturday. Especially Friday and Saturday nights.

Why? Well, most girls are busy then. Or at least they’d like you to think they’re busy then. Any girl who’s read The Rules knows she’s not supposed to agree to a date Friday or Saturday night. Makes her seem too available, after all.

On top of this, you don’t want to seem too available. You’re a single guy. Shouldn’t you be out partying on Friday night? Or maybe hooking up with a friend-with-benefits? Having drinks with the boys? If you’re free on a weekend night – especially if she isn’t – you risk looking a little, well... lame.

However, there’s a catch here. And that catch is that if you can pull off a Friday night or Saturday night date, you get a date during the most sex-primed part of the week. It’s easier to sleep with girls on Friday or Saturday night. And if you get them out one-on-one with you on Friday or Saturday night? Hoo boy.

The art, of course, is how to get girls out for a Friday night date or a Saturday night date, without the seeming like the guy with no plans and no social life. That’s the real trick.

9 Ways Technology is Hurting Your Seduction

technology and seduction
Technology offers myriad colossal benefits. Yet, it can hurt your ability to meet and succeed with women just as much as it helps.

Errol Flynn, gazing into his girl’s eyes, taking her face into his excited hands... getting closer to her, just about to kiss… and *bliiim* he gets a Snapchat notification, opens it, and starts chatting and sending duck-face selfies.

Difficult to imagine such a situation, right? Well, it’s not THAT far from what’s happening today with young generations. You’re probably thinking “Nah, Davi is exaggerating, I’m not THAT addicted to technology. No worries on my end.” But let me tell you, technology’s influence on your game can be WAY more subtle, and even good seducers get trapped in some of the modern world’s pitfalls.

Now, don’t get me wrong. This is not an anti-tech piece; rather, it is meant to illustrate how tech can hamper your success with women if used improperly.

In this article, I’ll detail three different categories in which today’s technology has an impact.

First of all, conversations: we have so many different communication methods now, and they all have their own rules. People are having more and more virtual exchanges than vivid, real-life discussions. And they take the digital world’s rules as face value and apply them in real life – DANGER.

I’ll also cover the impacts this has on approaches, before talking about three specific problems affecting your seducer-you: investment/availability, power delegation, and immediacy.