Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

How to Minimize Nagging from Your Girlfriend or Wife

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

minimize nagging from your girlfriend or wifeGirls nag guys. As soon as a girl sees a guy relaxing or otherwise ‘unoccupied’, the female restlessness and nagging begins. What can you do to minimize it?

If you have a woman, she’s going to nag you. No two ways about it.

Men, in general, agree. Like in this forum post:

It seems like women are hard coded to be restless and turn restless the man that has the misfortune of being in her proximity for too long.

I kid you not, I never had a woman at my house that allowed me to sit my ass on the sofa for more than a hour without demanding actions, time or assigning tasks.

The same moment your ass cheecks hit the pillow surely and quickly comes a "can you help me with..." or "let's go to ....", "are you really just gonna sit there and do nothing"?

Just like kids their brain cannot understand the concept of beind idle to rest and recover, they either sleep or they need non stop entertainment.

But what really makes them unbearable to me are the tasks they feel the need to assign wheter is to get an object in the room they can get themselves, close the curtain, throw away the trash on demand, check for something and so on.

Or this Reddit thread:

Reddit thread about nagging women

This behavior is annoying. It is annoying when men do it to women – I have done it deliberately to women, just to see how they react, and, yep, without exception, they also hate being nagged to do stuff. It is also annoying when women do it to men. Nevertheless, it is primarily women doing the nagging – and often it seems like they just cannot help themselves.

The poster in that first forum comment remarked that

the need for peace is probably the biggest drive not to engange in a serious relationship at least for my taste.

But must a man choose either a peaceful life OR a woman? Is “one or the other” the only way?

Study: More Powerful Romantic Partners Sacrifice Less

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

powerful romantic partners sacrifice lessWho holds more power in a romantic relationship? The one who’s still pursuing goals and dreams outside of it, scientific studies show.

In another study that surprises absolutely no one, researchers have found that those with more relative power within a relationship sacrifice less for the sake of the relationship:

Romantic partners often have to sacrifice their interests to benefit their partner or to maintain the relationship. In the present work, we investigated whether relative power within the relationship plays an important role in determining the extent to which partners are likely to sacrifice. Drawing from both classic theories and recent research on power, we tested two competing predictions on the relationship between power and sacrifice in romantic relationships. We tested whether (a) power is negatively related to sacrifice and (b) power is positively related to sacrifice. Furthermore, we also explored whether the association between power and sacrifice is moderated by commitment and inclusion of the other in the self. To test our hypotheses, we used different methodologies, including questionnaires, diary studies, and videotaped interactions. Results across the five studies (N = 1,088) consistently supported the hypothesis that power is negatively related to tendencies to sacrifice in close relationships.

While this seems obvious – i.e., that the person who’s the “one-down” in the relationship ends up doing more of the sacrificing than the person who’s the “one-up” – I think it’s worth discussing a bit in-depth to understand just what’s going on here… and why.

Seduction as Offense vs. Resistance as Defense

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

offense vs. defense in seductionIn many ways, seduction is analogous to warfare. Yet men’s seduction – offense here – need not be ‘hostile’ towards women’s defensive ‘resistance’!

I’ve dived back into reading On War, Carl von Clausewitz’s masterful treatise on military action. I’d taken a break to read some fiction (such as Edgar Rice Burroughs’s peak masculinity adventure stories) and a few other non-fiction books on various subjects, but now, like a band of pillagers that struck off temporarily to replenish its supplies before returning to the siege, I’ve wandered back.

Clausewitz speaks often about friction, his term for difficulties doing just about anything in war – a force that bogs down what should be simple maneuvers and plays spoiler to otherwise sound strategies. I’d like to write about how this relates to seduction too… but for today the topic is something else.

Because as Clausewitz talks about offense and defense, I see many parallels there to our topic of discussion here. In many ways, within a romance, the ‘offense’ is the efforts to seduce – while the ‘defense’ is the efforts to resist that seduction.

What I’d like to do is highlight some takeaways from Clausewitz that apply every bit to the romantic battlefield as they do the martial one.

After all, as they say, all’s fair in love and war, and the two fields have their similarities.

Talk About Pansexualism with Girls (and Hook Them In!)

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

the pansexuality gambitPansexualism has become a trendy sexuality… and it makes for great sex talk fuel with girls. Use this gambit in your chats to get the juice flowing.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

In last week's post, I discussed socio-cultural changes in the West that affect the efficiency of sex talk. All my gambits still work, but sexual openness, non-judgementalism, and low-keyness gambits previously had a more significant effect than they do today. We still get positive results, but they are less impactful now. Women back then opened up and loved you for uttering those words. Why the change? Well, slut-shaming is less prevalent, and the culture of female empowerment allows women to be more social about their sexuality. This is not to say that women won't like you for using those gambits; they still have a potent affect-but it is not the magic trick it once was.

However, in some conservative countries with more conservative girls, gambits about sexual openness, lowkey-ness, and reframing sex as positive still work like a charm! So, those gambits have not hit their expiration date yet!

But some subjects simply work better now, like sexual avant-gardism and sexual comfort. The gambit that I am to go through covers the former. It's about having an edge, pushing the norms that help some women become immersed in what you have to say. This allows you to build rapport and get easy hooks. Even better, it opens the gate to juicier, more explicit subjects.

Sleeping with Girls Who Are 'Done with Casual Sex'

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By: Chase Amante

girl is done with casual sexMany girls will tell you they are ‘done with causal sex’… then resist your escalation to sex. What does this mean – and HOW do you sleep with such girls?

Tactics Tuesdays: Cool Guy Emulation

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By: Chase Amante

cool guy emulationCool guys behave in subtly different ways than guys who just ‘do what cool guys do’ without BEING cool. How can you emulate this and actually BECOME cool?

What are you focused on when you’re talking to girls? Is it:

  • Looking out for cues and responding to signals?

  • Active listening to understand what she’s saying and feed it back to her?

  • Using good tactics and making the right moves to progress things forward?

  • Worrying about what she thinks of you and whether you are doing it right?

These are all useful things to focus on when you are learning them.

They are also things you will be aware of in the back of your head even once you have learned them.

However, guys who are good don’t have any of these things as primary foci with girls. Instead, these are background processes occurring in their heads, keeping an eye on their interactions for them, calibrating on the fly.

What do skilled, cool guys focus on when they talk to girls?

That’s what we’ll talk about today.

That, and how to emulate such guys, so you can get similar results to them too.

Adapting Sex Talk to Lonely, Independent, or Older Women

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

sex talk for lonely and independent womenMore women today are lonely, isolated, and/or sexually awkward. They long to feel like strong and independent women — & good sex talk can GIVE them this.

Hey guys, and welcome back.

Last week, I discussed social change and how it affects game, particularly my favorite technique of sex talk, although you can use my observations to tweak other forms of game.

Today, the Western world is more sexually liberated, partly due to feminism and the LGBTQ+ movement (who may have moved from older ideals, turning to their own political ideology while maintaining the ideals of openness and tolerance). So, the old gambits that convey a sexually liberated and nonjudgmental attitude toward sex may be less efficient than before. These gambits may still work as the fear of slut-shaming is deeply ingrained in women and society, but the effects may be lower.

It’s true—unless you are dealing with a conservative girl or if she wants others to see her as one. If so, the good old stuff still works like a charm. It’s the same if you live in a more conservative country.

However, I have noticed that it is easier to get more explicit more quickly with today’s more liberal women. That doesn’t mean you should drop your calibration, though. Calibrating in real-time is what truly matters, but generally, you can get more explicit sooner. And the good old explicit sexual prizing gambits conveying that you are a good lover with plenty of sexual experience and knowledge—a man who can give her the sex she rarely gets and badly craves still works.

Due to the modern social climate, the primary issue younger girls face is a lack of sexual confidence and comfort. Gambits focusing on those work like a charm. It is like the new gold.

So, today, I’ll continue discussing social change, concentrating on how this affects modern world sex talk.

As we will see, recent social change has forged paths for new sex talk techniques. Today, we have themes that work better and new themes with great potential.

9 Pieces of Red Pill Dating Advice that Are Blue Pill AF

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By: Chase Amante

red pill dating adviceRed pill offers a lot of dating advice to curious men. While this advice can seem good on the surface, much of it is lifted directly from the ‘blue pill’.

Seduction has a strange relationship with the red pill. The two fields have plenty of overlap on many things, but there’re also some glaring (often diametrically opposed) contrasts in perspectives and practices.

When the red pill first split off from the seduction community in the late 2000-naughts, it more or less carbon copied the dating advice of seduction, albeit infused with politics and just a dash of cynical avoidance. Since that time, it’s exploded in size, becoming an enormous ideological sect that dwarfs its seduction community forebear. Yet as it’s grown, it’s also transmogrified so radically that a lot of its dating advice has altered as well, in some cases becoming rigid and dogmatic, and in others completely watered down.

There are some reasons for this that are worth a brief address. If you don’t care about the reasons and history, however, you can just skip down to #1 and get right to the ‘advice’.

First though, let’s talk exactly how red pill dating advice became such weak sauce.

As an Older Man, Do You Need Money to Date Younger Girls?

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By: Chase Amante

do older men need money to date younger girlsYounger women date exceptional older men. But does this mean an older man needs wealth to date younger? Not exactly – YET his occupation is KEY…

A while back, I wrote an article entitled “What's It Take to Attract and Date Younger Women?” In this article, I stated that to date younger women as an older man, you must be an exceptional older man.

One of the ways I said you need to be exceptional is in your career. I stated that

You can't play the mysterious/traveling unemployed adventurer card as an older man; once you're past 33 or 34 or so, I think you've pretty much got to be a business owner (best), retired (second best, or maybe tied for best), or reasonably high up in whatever you do for work.

Over the years, I’ve had numerous men worried that they wouldn’t qualify for this asking if that means they’re precluded from dating younger women. Most recently, a reader commenting on my article about the 12 mindsets of highly successful seducers asked about this, saying

Chase,

Great article as always.

I wanted to ask a quick question and get clarification on something.

So, I’m reading through old articles of yours and noticed some are about not needing a lot of money to do well with women, but I still get confused with the older man being exceptional article.

I know money isn’t everything with seduction, but with that older man getting younger women article. It always sticks out to me when you said you’d need to be relatively high up in your career, retired, or have your own business by your 30s if you want younger women.

Then you have later articles about how saying you’re a business owner doesn’t win points with women, having a high paying career doesn’t attract women, etc.

You say it’s better to be an artist or whatever romantic hobby you do.

Then there are the articles about getting women while broke, living like a minimalist, etc.

I know you need money for a family, maybe a relationship.

But from what I got from the exceptional older man article was that you need to have a high paying career, a business, or be retired (which means you have money) in order to get younger women.

Of course game and fundamentals matter too, but from that article, money seems the most important because if it wasn’t it wouldn’t have been mentioned.

Every time I think of that part in the article it feels like you won’t have any chance with younger attractive women if you don’t have one of those things with money. Then I read articles after that that sound like you still have a chance because career and money don’t matter if you don’t have fundamentals and game.

So is money and being exceptional only needed for younger women? Were those articles about not mentioning your career or saying you’re a business owner only good for women your own age?

Could you please clarify these things for me?

Thanks

So, all right. Let’s clarify what I mean by ‘exceptional older man’ and why I say those things – owning a business, being retired, or being high up in your career – are important.

And no, it has nothing (or very little) to do with MONEY!