Articles by Author: Chase Amante | Girls Chase

Articles by Author: Chase Amante

Does the Lover Always Win the Game of Love?

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lover in the game of loveLovers are skilled in the game of love. But do they ALWAYS win? If not… then is being the lover still really the best path to succeeding with girls?

In a recent article of mine, I mentioned scenarios where the lover may not get the girl.

Instead, she might spurn the lover, finding him unattainable despite whatever attractive qualities he may have, and instead pair up with a much safer man, better known to her and better trusted, albeit less exciting.

This triggered some confusion in a reader, who asked whether the lover didn’t always get the girl, and whether it was actually better to be the lover.

In case you’re new, a few quick definitions are in order:

  • ‘Lover’, in our parlance, refers to the sexually desirable mate choice with uncertain future prospects. The sexy, flirtatious bad boy who seems quite attractive but also seems like he’s not exactly boyfriend material being a prime example of such a man. When she’s not interested in such men, a woman won’t usually try to friend zone them (since she won’t be able to); instead, she’ll just reject them

  • ‘Provider’, in our parlance, is a man who courts her by going the ‘safe route’: he advertises his dependability, reliability, and consistency; his motto might well be “You can count on me.” He isn’t sexy, the way the dangerous, inconstant bad boy is… but for a girl in need of a safe, stable place to take shelter, he may be just the refuge she seeks. The rest of the time, however, the friend zone will tend to be his home

Anyway, the short answer to our commenter is that no, the lover does not always win the game of love. Sometimes the nice guy provider who’s hung so reliably by her side, and courted her with such ongoing dedication, finally does get the girl… leaving any lovers who may have pursued her out in the cold.

Yet, the lover angle is still the savvier angle to pursue for any man who possesses the energy to pursue it, for numerous key reasons – reasons any man who’s serious about romantic success does well to understand.

PDA Pre-Relationship vs. Post-Consummation

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TEXTPDA can be lots of fun in relationships. When you use it with girls you haven’t bedded yet, though, it backfires. Why’s it so different pre- vs. post-sex?

Most folks have some kind of opinion on public displays of affection (PDA).

Some like indulging in them, some don’t. Although some can go either way.

If you’re inexperienced at picking up women, but you’ve had prior relationships with PDA, you may associate such displays with “doing really well with a girl.” You’ll be out somewhere with your girlfriend, start feeling each other all up, tonguing each other down heavily, and by the time you finally get each other alone somewhere the clothes just come flying off and the passion and intensity of the sex is phenomenal.

However, when you start cold approaching, or meeting women at parties, or anywhere else you encounter strange women, and you begin using PDA on them, you start running into a different phenomenon:

The passion explodes… a girl seems really, really into you… everything is unfolding exactly how it has with prior girlfriends of yours you’ve done PDA with… yet just as you’re assuming it’s a shoe-in, this girl’s about to be yours, she ups and leaves and you don’t get the girl.

What happened? How on Earth did you lose her?

She was so into it… why would she leave?

The answer is female state control – and it’s a phenomenon you won’t (usually) see in women you’ve already consummated a sexual relationship with… but absolutely will with girls prior to consummation.

Tactics Tuesdays: Friendship Strengtheners

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friendship strengthenersEven if making friends is easy, getting close to them is not. How do you build deep, lasting friendships? The secret is trust… which takes time; and also technique.

Men who end up reading Girls Chase often seek improvement socially beyond just dating. They also want better and stronger friendships, broader social circles, and superior social skills across the board.

I’ve fielded a lot of questions over the years about how to deepen friendships. Often guys may make new friends, but observe that their new friends have deeper friendships with others than they do with them.

Part of the answer to this is “time” – spending enough time around and interacting with someone is a necessary step to building a  lasting and deep relationship.

Another part of the answer though is “quality experiences” – i.e., not just hanging around eating Cheetos together watching the football game, but actually doing things or connecting over things that further the friendship bond.

Today I’m going to introduce you to several types of ‘friendship strengtheners’. Most of these will work to deepen your relationships with women as well. You won’t normally need them for a run-of-the-mill seduction… however, if you have a girl who’s a particularly tough case, or whom you’ve screwed up and need to recover with… or if you have a girl you’re already seeing, but you want a much stronger, deeper relationship with her… then these can work great.

We’ll start with activity-based friendship strengtheners, which are the more robust kind, but less convenient to use. Then we’ll talk about verbal friendship strengtheners, which are more flexible to use, but require the relationship already be at a certain point (which we’ll discuss, not to worry).

Female High Standards: Evolutionary Basis & Self-Advertisement

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women's high standardsWomen often seem to have high standards for men. But why? Evolution suggests an answer: it benefits their DNA. Yet there’s more to it than just this…

Women’s too high standards have been a topic of discussion on this site many times over the years. We had the whole ongoing discussion about it last year, but we talked about it far before then too.

The position I have repeatedly many times is that women have high standards and have always had high standards. Arguing that ‘high female standards’ is some kind of new phenomenon is just more of the same historical ignorance you see with ‘any phenomenon X is a new phenomenon’. As King Solomon said, there is nothing new under the sun.

Watch old movies or TV shows or read old books and be amazed at how high the professed standards of the women are. Women, in all times and all places, maintain standards higher than men’s.

Every woman wants the perfect man: good-looking, wealthy, popular, and skilled.

No matter if she herself is far from perfect.

Why is this, though? Shouldn’t women be more realistic?

The Slow-Build Kiss

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TEXTWhen the situation isn’t perfect for a smooch, use the slow-build kiss. Seed the kiss, get her thinking about it, then –once you’ve prepared her for it – kiss her.

Sometimes you find yourself in a situation – whether in public or alone – where you know you should kiss a girl, but the setup just isn’t right. Even if you know how to kiss a girl you just can’t pull it off properly.

You might be physically far away from her, with no smooth way to bridge the distance.

She might be putting up walls, one of those “she wants it but she’s afraid of it”-type scenarios.

You might have created a moment, only for her to pull away or otherwise disrupt it.

If you go charging in like a bull and just go for it, well… it might work.

It might also lead to her recoiling, and now you’ve got a lot more work to do to smooth things out to build back up to a kiss again – when instead you could’ve done it right from the get-go.

The way you kiss a girl right in imperfect situations like this isn’t barreling in.

Instead, it is by using the slow-build kiss – a kiss that primes her for what’s coming, building anticipation for the kiss, before your lips ever touch hers.

[VIDEOS] First Two Videos in “Fantastic Fundamentals”

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For many years, guys have asked me to go a lot more in-depth into fundamentals.

They want more specifics on how to maximize their attractive characteristics… stuff like eye contact, posture, walk, movement, fashion, social power, voice.

Well, I’ve finally gotten around to putting something like that together: a COMPLETE fundamentals deep dive that’ll consist of 37 videos once they’re all on the site – some free, some premium – that go into intimate detail on becoming the most attractive man you can be.

Calisthenics: A First-Rate Alternative to Lifting Weights

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man doing pull-upsMost guys who want to get fit today head to the gym. But what if you didn’t need the gym for it? What if you could get stronger, in a more balanced way, from anywhere? That’s calisthenics.

Do you use bodyweight exercises as a part of your exercise regimen?

You really should. They offer some wonderful benefits, such as:

  • Exercising the WHOLE body. Not just isolated muscles

  • Developing total body strength, rather than strong muscles and weak muscles

  • Allowing you to exercise from ANYWHERE, including hotel rooms & girls’ places

  • The ability to recover from joint and muscle injuries (such as those from lifting weights)

It took me years to come around to calisthenics. For the longest time I confused “cardio” with “calisthenics.” Even when I understood what calisthenics were I found them dull, slow, and underpowered.

Yet today I have a very different view on this type of exercise.

And because a fit body is an attractive fundamentals, and because a man needs the health and fitness to do what he wants to do in life (including approach girls), I figured I’d write an introduction to calisthenics here – for those readers who, like me, perhaps never really considered them as an alternative, as well as for those readers who’d like to exercise more but have a hard time getting to the gym.

First, because I think a lot of guys are probably in the place I was, where lifting weights seems a lot better than using bodyweight exercises, let me tell you the story of how I got into them.

Then we’ll talk a little bit more about how to do them.

Tactics Tuesdays: Tease Her About Wanting to Get Rid of Her

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woman making shocked expressionIf you like to tease girls, you’ll like this one: teasing her by implying you want to get rid of her or get her away. Not only can this be a fun, playful tease – it is also a chase frame.

I was reminded to write a post on a favored form of teasing by a recent report on our forum.

In it, the thread starter (Fluxcapacitor) relentlessly teases the girl he ultimately beds by implying that either:

  1. He wants to get rid of her, or

  2. He thinks she is a pariah in general

For example:

Girl: (eagerly) I'm going to Pub X!

Flux: Oh cool, I know to avoid there then.

Another:

Girl: Oh well it sucks to be you! (playfully with a giggle)

Flux: It actually does! Then I come out here and bump into you! It just gets worse!

And another:

Girl: I know, I know. But this is where the cool people come.

Flux: I'm surprised they let you in (playful look)

Here's one more:

Girl: It sucks to be you.

Flux: It actually does, and now I've just spent all night with you, how bad is that?!

As a guy who enjoys giving girls a good ribbing, this kind of teasing is one I quite like too.

Today, we're going to take a quick look at how this "get rid of her" / "she's a pariah" teasing works.

How to Screen a Girl's Logistics

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screen a woman's logisticsKnowing a woman’s logistics is important to not waste time. Not all women are logistically available. Logistical screens come in two flavors: visual and verbal.

One of the more important strategic abilities in seduction is that of logistics screening.

Your average guy has little ability to screen women for logistics. The result is that he wastes a lot of time talking to women who are logistically unavailable. Meanwhile, women who were far more logistically available slip away from him, unnoticed and unapproached.

A man who’s skilled at logistical screening, on the other hand, saves time, saves heartache, and enables himself to scoop up women with a consistency a more “logistically blind” man can only dream of.

How do you develop this ability to sniff out a woman’s logistics, and focus on the women who are more available (instead of the ones who aren’t)?

You learn the signs to look for – and the information to seek out.

Sexual Selection and the Power of Fitness Indicators

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TEXTSurvival of the fittest only goes so far in explaining our adaptations. The rest comes down to sexual selection – and the fitness indicators we use to convey our qualities.

Pop quiz: what do these six men have in common?

  • A self-made multimillionaire
  • A bulked up bodybuilder
  • A renowned painter
  • A respected philosopher
  • A successful athlete
  • A talented pick up artist

The answer will surprise you!

Before we get to that, we need to talk about evolution… the fascinating subject of today’s post.

Along the way, we’re going to explore a lot about the way male and female animals – including humans – advertise their fitness to mates, and exactly how these ‘fitness indicators’ work.