Insights from the Mind of a Seducer | Girls Chase

Insights from the Mind of a Seducer

How to Disarm Feminism in Your Girlfriend or Wife

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

girlfriend feministWhen your girlfriend (or wife) starts bringing up feminist talking points, you need to know how to respond. Here’s how to defuse these and get your relationship back on track.

This is going to be a somewhat in-depth article, with a deep look at the full (i.e., millennia- and civilization-spanning) history of feminism.

The purpose is to give you a broad, complete, and meta-view of what feminism is, how it arises, and what its function is in a civilization, so you can break out of male-female power struggles and get the women in your life to take a sweeping historical view of feminism as part of a natural cycle, rather than a more basic/low level "Fight the patriarchy! Permanent progress for the first time ever!" view.

Before we get to the real history of feminism though, first let's talk about why you'd need to talk a girlfriend or wife out of feminist leanings.

No matter your political beliefs, it is a self-evident fact that there is a certain branch of feminism that is toxic to male-female relations.

Some feminist views are fine, and not all of it is bad. However, there is a very vocal chunk of it that is acidic to happy relationships.

Mixed Groups Pt. 2: How to Approach Them

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

sexy girls dancing with guys aloftThere are two tried and tested ways to approach a mixed group. One is to wait for the opportune moment. The other? Mystery Method.

Hey guys, welcome back.

Last week we discussed mixed groups and the tendency guys have to immediately assume that any men interacting with girls must be part of their group, when they could have met the girls that same night.

You can’t assume all men in a club will spend the entire night idle. Some approach girls eventually (especially after binging booze — if you’re able to do the same somewhat sober you’ll enjoy a significant advantage).

In my experience, most men don’t cold approach much (unless drunk) in bars and clubs, but it still happens. Cultural differences can play a part. In some more social cultures, men walk up to talk to girls more often.

What if you happen to belong to a culture where that is not the norm? It could be that the guys with the girl you fancy know each other. But does that mean they’re part of the same group?

Tactics Tuesdays: Post-Sex Behavior After Mediocre Sex

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

mediocre sexYour first time in bed goes a long way toward determining whether a woman sees you again. But it’s not about your technical performance. It’s about how you make her feel.

I'm seeing a lot of cases recently where guys are laying girls, giving mediocre performances in bed, then not being able to get those girls out again.

They message them for a while, and the girls message back less and less enthusiastically, less and less frequently.

Eventually these girls drop off their radars altogether.

There are some common themes I'm seeing in both why these girls drop off and why the guys in question can't get them back.

I started this article wanting to talk about follow-up strategies, and I may get around to that.

But as I got into it, it occurred to me that really the core problem is how guys are behaving with women in the bedroom.

So instead, in today's article, I want to give the reader some tactics he can use to reverse this trend in his own seductions, in the bedroom, and retain more of the women he takes to bed.

Joint Date Planning Before You Ask Her Out

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

joint date planPlan a date together, before you leave her side, to raise the odds she shows up for it later. Use a few date-maximizing tricks to stack things in your favor.

Usually when we talk about how to ask a girl out, I tell you to keep it as simple as possible:

  1. Ask her out
  2. Then take her contact info

The reason is because in general I think the simpler your processes are, while still being effective, they easier they are to learn, the easier they are to remember, and the easier they are to stick to when there's a lot of other stuff going on.

However, what if you're a more intermediate guy, or advanced?

What if you want another way to reduce flakes and up the odds girls show up on dates with you?

Enter joint date planning, a surefire method to slash your flakes and up your date turnout.

Best of all, it's not something you need to fumble your thumbs with doing over messages -- you'll do it right there in person with the girl when you meet her, before you ever leave her side.

Girl Hunting: Pickiness vs. Selectiveness

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

girl standards pickyMany guys are ‘too picky’ with girls. They ignore good-looking and great girls. Then end up alone, or stuck with girls who are bad news. You must escape this trap.

Here's a couple of concepts I want to differentiate for newer (and maybe some not-so-newer) guys:

Those of pickiness vs. selectiveness.

If you've read my stuff on screening for both long-term commitment as well as for girls you'll hook up with in one-night stands, you know how much I harp on screening out girls who aren't a fit and/or will cause you problems.

I've cited science that shows men are a lot less discriminating about the women they start relationships with than women are men, and that men look for red flags a lot less.

In other words, men are a lot more likely to stumble into relationship quicksand.

However, there is a flip side to all this discrimination you want to employ as a dater, and that is this: if you are too picky about the wrong things, you can also stunt your growth as a seducer and make it nigh impossible to get enough experience to progress.

This is the double side of being discriminating: you must be discriminating enough, without being too much so.

You must be selective without being overly picky.

Women Are Totally Obsessed with Sex (in Many Ways More So Than Guys)

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

girls horny all the timeSome guys seem to think women are ‘innocent’. The actual fact is women are obsessed with sex. They think, talk, and fantasize about it constantly.

Look closely at the picture on the right. What do you see?

I circled it for you. There just below this girl's hand. See it?

It's a dildo.

For all you guys worried about your penis size, you might want to pay attention to the size of that dildo too. That water bottle is 7". The dildo is at least an inch shorter than it... actually possibly a bit more than an inch shorter.

There is this misconception among sexually less experienced men that women don't actually get horny except in extreme situations.

"Only when she meets just the right guy... and he says just the right things... and takes just the right actions... does a woman get horny..."

Women do upkeep on this misconception themselves, talking about how "men are always horny, OMG" or "all men think about is sex" or "why are men so much hornier than women."

But the truth is, women are total horndogs themselves.

You might not believe it (yet) if you're not that experienced with them.

However, once you get out of the illusory la-la land men are in before they gain experience with women, your eyes will start to open more and more, and you'll realize the vast majority of women -- including the sweetest, cutest, most innocent of gals -- really love themselves some cock.

Influence Half-Life: While Away, You're Losing Influence

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

influence half-lifeInfluence has a half-life... and every moment you're not with someone, your influence over that person decays.

Riddle me this: why is it that some women, while with you, can be utterly captivated by you... then they leave your side and you never hear from them again?

Why is it that some women can be in a relationship and totally compliant with you, yet you send them off for a few days into the hands of their workmates or their wild party friends, and by the time they get back to you you're dealing with full-on rebellion?

Why is it that a girl will agree with you completely and tell you you are right about something, yet after a few days away she comes back and says "Actually you're wrong" and you have to have the same argument all over again?

It's because influence has a half-life, and every time you're away from her, your interest decays.

Your ability to influence another person is in direct proportion to that person's level of sustained exposure to you.

The less sustained that exposure is, the less strong the influence, and the more quickly it falls apart.

Tactics Tuesdays: 3% Frames (Push Her Off the Fence)

Chase Amante's picture

By: Chase Amante

3% framesDo you keep running into the same objections? Construct frames that circumvent these (and increase your odds by 3-5%).

I know a guy who always struggles with chemistry with women.

He doesn't do things exactly quite right. He uses all the right tactics and techniques with women, but he uses them in this way that is just a little bit 'off'.

When you try to point it out to him, he insists that in fact he is doing everything correctly. Then he says it must be a problem with the technique or that the technique doesn't work for him.

Regardless the reason, he constantly runs into issues where he has what he thinks is a great date, followed by the woman telling him at the end of it (or texting him later on) that she "just isn't feeling it."

"There's no chemistry," she says. Or "I didn't feel a spark."

I can't get him to fix the vibe/calibration issues. He doesn't see these as a real problem, probably because he's unable to pick up on this issue himself, even when women point it out or coaches point it out.

However, I wanted to help him, so gave him a tool I knew he could use: a 3% frame to help push things his way in those edge cases where it could go either way, but "I'm not feeling a spark" is the deciding factor.

Should You Date Girls Who DON'T Excite You?

Alek Rolstad's picture

By: Alek Rolstad

girls who don't excite youDating girls who only mildly excite you can help you get out of a dry spell with a short-term fling.

Hey guys. I hope you’re all doing great despite the circumstances.

Today I want to answer the question: Should you date girls you don’t feel too excited about?

FunkMaster69 raised this point:

“I've found myself meeting women that I just think are meh. I usually pass on them because I wanna date someone that I like and who excites me. But I've noticed that, as I've been getting older, there have been less and less women around me. Many of them are getting cuffed, and, of the ones left, the quality seems to be getting lower and lower...a lot of single moms too.

The thing is that I think my standards are too high...looking back now, I could have banged or married like 100 different ladies. Seriously, I could have gotten married back in high school to one of the ladies in my honor classes if I wasn't so obsessed with cheerleaders who didn’t think I was their type (skinny little virgin). There aren’t that many women who impress me or blow me away...especially nowadays that I'm not in college anymore. The last one that I met stopped talking to me.

The one in college never even began talking to me. And the one in high school broke up with me. So should I keep waiting until I meet another one, which could take a long time and whom I might not land considering history, or just say screw it and date an average woman who would be delighted to have me? I've always wanted to be with someone that I'm excited to date and brag about...but the thought of dating one of these women who are very excited to date me sounds nice. I figure the relationship would be easy, and it would be a lot easier to get the date in the first place. But deep down, I would know for sure that I settled...idk, both choices seem wrong for some reason.

”

First things first: I wouldn’t commit to anything long-term with a girl who doesn’t excite me. That would be selling myself short and eventually lead to a bad relationship.

However, for:

Why not?

Over the long-term, you want to move toward finding and getting the women who truly excite you. This is the ultimate goal.

I keep in touch with issues men deal with by answering questions raised in our online discussion forum. Having been around for nearly 15 years, I may have distanced myself a bit from regular guys. Forum posts allow me to catch up.

Were it not for this post, I wouldn’t have reflected on this topic.