Articles by Hector Castillo | Girls Chase

Articles by Hector Castillo

2 Reasons Women Create Drama in Relationships (and How to Fix Things)

relationship drama end fights
Relationship insecurity and loss of respect are common culprits when women create drama. Here’s how to identify the root of the issue and nip it in the bud.

The drama is never done with your girlfriend. There will always be drama, regardless of whether you did anything to annoy her, anger her, or make her feel insecure.

If you’re running the relationship well, drama will be low. You run a relationship well by providing her with good dick and enough adventure to satisfy her. You maintain her respect by being a man with pride and self-respect and by making her feel secure that you won’t randomly leave her without due cause.

Of course, her personality and propensity for anxiety, depression, anger, jealousy, and other drama-causing emotions play a huge role in how often she starts drama. That’s why picking a girl carefully is paramount for a healthy long-term relationship.

Nevertheless, you will eventually do something to upset her or she’ll be upset about something in her life and it will make her over-sensitive to normally acceptable behavior – then she’ll take it out on you.

This is fine. Drama is good. Without drama, we’d get bored. My primary reactions to drama are annoyance or anger – but occasionally, I enjoy it. The ups and downs addict us. Plus, it’s fun to watch her get horny when you win an argument. It’s great when she was mad at you but she’s forgiven you for something – you may be a bastard, but you’re her bastard.

However, you need to know how to finish drama. And one tip that will save you a lot of frustration is this: drama isn’t usually over after one fight – or even one discussion.

If the drama was anything beyond a small misunderstanding, it might take two, three, or even more talks to settle the fire, and days could pass between each discussion. You’ll think everything is fine, that you solved the issue, but then a few days later, you’ll notice she’s in a mood, and you’ll ask yourself, “What did I do now?” You’ll wonder and wonder, then prod and prod, asking her what’s up. You’ll get the infamous “nothing” response. Then you keep nagging.

Yes, keep nagging. Don’t let her get away with answering “nothing” when it’s clearly something. That will show you to be insensitive to her emotions, which makes her feel like you don’t understand her. It’s your job as a boyfriend to take care of her emotions. You’re her lover and, in some ways, her father.

If a girlfriend won’t spit it out, I’ll say to her, “Okay, we’ll I’ve asked multiple times now and you won’t tell me what’s wrong. Later, if you tell me something was wrong, I’m going to be pissed. This is your chance.” Usually, she will tell me at this point. If she doesn’t and complains about something later, I’ll have morally righteous anger on my side, which is very powerful in drama.

“Woman, I told you…”

Works like a charm.

Once you find out what’s wrong, it’s time to deal with the problem. This is done in two steps.

How to Be a Gentleman and a Cad

how to be a gentleman and a cad
What does it take to be a gentleman who attracts women? Present yourself well, be respectful, and fulfill her need to be ravaged in the bedroom.

Every good student aims to follow in the footsteps of his mentors. I, therefore, dedicate this article to Chase Amante. It’s my pleasure to stand on the shoulders of a giant and offer my thoughts on what I’ve learned from him about being a gentleman.

In his article on how to be a gentleman, Chase’s main premise is that you can be respectful and treat women well but still bed them quickly. I want to take that a step further and go into detail about how you can be a dirty MF – while also being a gentleman.

Let’s start with threads.

What Personality Will Help You Get the Girl

the personality to get the girl
Does your personality determine which types of girls you do best with? Which girls go for what, and what can you do to get the type of girls you want?

Almost every personality type can get girls. Some personalities are more naturally inclined to extroversion and socialization, so they tend to do better than more introverted personalities, but there is also strength in subtlety and grace.

The questions you need to ask yourself when considering who to become are these:

Each personality does well with specific other personalities – usually those that are similar.

As Chase has gone over extensively in One Date and The Dating Artisan (the best dating products on Earth), similarity is one third of what gets a girl into bed (arousal and compliance being the other two).

Note that as I describe these personality traits and women who gravitate towards them, there are always outliers and exceptions. I’ll be speaking in the general sense. In other words, this is how things usually play out, meaning that certain personality types will have “better” chances with particular girl types. I’m not taking the luck factor into account or guys with good enough game to overcome general trends.

For example, if you lean towards introversion, you will be better suited to a certain type of girl. You will do best with shy, less-attractive women. Extroverted guys will also be good with these women if they can lower their guard, but more often than not, these girls tend to gravitate towards introverted guys.

To most guys, of course, they’re not the most desirable of women. If you are an introvert but have great fundamentals, then you can land super-ambitious businesswomen who are fawned over by CEOs and business tycoons. These men are usually extroverts, but there are far more extroverts who are wild party guys than there are extroverted businessmen. The women in question like the extroversion of the party guy but not his comparatively carefree life. He’s not a serious prospect for a girl whose reputation is everything to her and her business.

Of course, there might be an artist who’s amazing with women and will absolutely kill it with ambitious girls, but they will probably gravitate towards a more serious type of guy. These are generalizations for the sake of painting a clear dichotomy, but personality differences reach far beyond the basic dichotomy of extroverted versus introverted.

As I’ve written in my article on girls and their types, you need to be what they want, and sometimes that can be complicated. Despite having a lot of similar features, we are vastly complex beings.

Why Now Is a Great Time for Interracial Dating

interracial dating
With the spread of liberal ideologies, interracial dating is now widely accepted… and in a way, exciting for girls. Here’s how to make the most of being a minority.

Everyone is a minority somewhere. If you’re a white guy and you go to Africa, you will be a vanilla gem for all the dark girls. If you’re black and you go to Eastern Europe, you’re going to be dark chocolate for all the white girls. If you’re Asian and you go to South America, you will be a sexy, squinty-eyed, kung-fu dickin’ dude.

Being a minority, wherever you are, has both advantages and disadvantages, and right now, the advantages have never been higher. This is due to a few reasons.

Firstly, liberal ideologies stood as the dominant political schema for a long time. I’d say a strong three or four decades. Left-leaning ideas infiltrated politics, academia, social media – everywhere.

And liberalism is… well, liberal. Open. Wide. I have some theories on why liberal ideologies dominate certain time periods and why conservative ideologies dominate others, but one consequence of liberal ideologies is sexual liberation. This sexual liberation not only enables women to sleep with lots of guys but also lots of different kinds of guys.

Moreover, any resistance to women screwing minorities is met with a very strong shame frame – insecurity. Women use insecurity as a frame all the time. They attempt to subvert your sexuality and dominance by making you fear the possibility of shame and ostracization.

When it comes to having sex with non-traditional guys, it goes like this. A girl comes from a predominately white background. Let’s say the Midwest of America (where I grew up). A conservative area. Bible belt. So she doesn’t see many Latino or black guys. But when she does, there’s an unspoken – or even spoken – stigma around it. I've seen lots of Confederate flags where I'm from.

Her attraction to a Latino or black guy is dangerous. She could be shamed for it. But if he’s attractive, she can’t help it. People can’t help who they’re attracted to. Him being Latino or black usually isn’t enough in and of itself to attract her, but if he’s attractive and he’s a minority, that creates a dark fantasy. It’s forbidden. It’s shameful. Why?

Even the Best Compliments for Girls Can Fail

compliments for girls
A girl’s reaction to your compliments can be a great screening tool and indicator of interest. But not all compliments are created equal in this regard.

Compliments are a good way to demonstrate interest. They’re hard to ignore and very clear in their intent. For guys who haven’t yet learned how to be sexy or demonstrate sexual interest with their eyes, face, and body language, a compliment cuts through all ambiguity and makes your case to her clear – “I want you.”

From that compliment, she will make a decision. Is she going to outright reject you? Will she be polite about it? Maybe she’ll entertain you for a little bit and see what more there is to you.

And sometimes, she’ll buy in completely because that’s what she wanted to hear from you. What’s important for you to recognize is how she specifically reacts to your compliment. That’s a critical juncture in the seduction.

If you can get a handle on what compliments to use and when, you can prevent some bad reactions. But that’s not how it always goes. Rejection from some women is inevitable. What’s important when facing rejection is to see how complete it is. If rejection is inevitable, then the question is about saving time: “Is she worth putting more time and energy into?”

Let’s first dive into the types of compliments.

Are Casual Hookups Worse Than Relationship Sex?

casual hookup vs relationship sex
Most experienced guys will agree that relationship sex is better than casual hookups. But that’s not to say you should limit yourself to one or the other.

I’ve read and heard many, many, many times that sex in a relationship is better than casual sex.

You’ll see it said in most media – be it television, movies, books, or on social feeds – that being a player and having lots of casual sex is empty and unfulfilling.

While there is some truth to this sentiment, I want to dispel some of the negative connotations surrounding casual sex.

Firstly, realize some possible motivations behind the negativity.

If a man says that casual sex is empty and relationship sex is fulfilling, he will usually fall under one of a few categories.

He is most likely a guy who doesn’t get laid a lot, is envious of those who do, and tries to shame them. To dissuade other men from banging lots of girls, he will advise against casual sex. He will poison the lifestyle with claims that it robs you of meaningful connections and is a waste of time. He’ll say that you shouldn’t disrespect women by seeing them as sex objects.

This guy is wrong for reasons you already are aware of – the pursuit of women is a worthy one. There are higher goals than chasing pussy, but it’s something almost every man needs to learn, at least to a degree.

There are also women who aren’t that competitive in the dating market, so they look to undermine men – either consciously or unconsciously – from pursuing other women during their sexual adventures. Ironically, this crusade against casual sex rarely stops the protesting women themselves from engaging in it.

Occasionally, you’ll hear this from a conservative, high-value girl, but it’s usually her reacting to a specific conversation rather than going out of her way to denounce casual sex. And don’t forget about the girl who just got pumped and screwed by some guy – she’s going to cry about casual sex being lame, but the real issue is she’s mad that the guy she gave it up for didn’t want more.

Men who are experienced but not expressing themselves clearly or are currently in a down state might also criticize the player lifestyle. It generally doesn’t come from a bad place and is usually the most informative of the “casual sex is inferior to relationship sex” arguments, but one should take pause when reading or listening to such criticism.

There is an important nuance when considering whether casual hookups are inferior to relationship sex.

Why You Should Treat EVERY Woman You Meet Like She’s Your Girlfriend

A true lover of women, which all good naturals are, always treats the women around him like the beautiful, sexy creatures they are.

Don’t hide your sexuality. Embrace it and express it! Make the girls around you, whether good friends or new acquaintances, feel like they’re loved and appreciated.

Do this and they will reward you with attention, kisses, and sometimes, sex.

Do You Keep Thinking “I Need a Girlfriend”? Read This First

I Need a Girlfriend
Do you need a girlfriend? Maybe. But perhaps you’d be better off without one right now. These considerations will help you decide.

What I’ve learned over many years of teaching, mentoring, and coaching, is that my desires have not always matched those of my students and clients.

One of my most common recommendations for guys at all levels is to sleep with a few women before settling down with one.

I know – from both ends of experience – why this can be helpful for men. My first serious girlfriend was the girl I lost my virginity to. Then, a few months into dating, we had to shift to a long-distance relationship when I went off to college.

The relationship itself wasn’t bad, and I learned a lot. Additionally, my life has led me to where I am, so I have no regrets. But regarding that long-term relationship, there were many better paths I could have taken, given how many chances I had with hot, thirsty girls at college.

It’s tough to judge the past from the future, since it is self-evident that the past – every detail and crease – led to this future.

As for girlfriends, something that takes time and focus on your part... that’s a tricky subject.

When should you have a girlfriend?

The question “Do I need a girlfriend?” comes to mind, as a teacher of the romantic arts. But for many guys out there, it takes the form of “I need a girlfriend.” Two different sentiments, but both lead to the same inquiry if one is calm and introspective.

There are times in your life when a girlfriend is nice but not necessary. There are also times when you really shouldn’t have a girlfriend, and there are times when you really need one.