Articles by Chase Amante | Girls Chase

Articles by Chase Amante

How to Attract Women (the Same Way Women Attract Men)

how to attract women

A few hours ago as I walked down a city street, a woman stepped out in front of me.

Her face and body were ordinary. But she triggered an involuntary response in me. My heart rate quickened. I felt excitement. I wanted to talk to this girl, and meet her.

I didn't talk to her. She finished crossing the sidewalk and entered the car waiting for her, with someone I guessed was a boyfriend.

And, truth be told, she wasn't really my type. Like I said, pretty average face and body.

Had I met her somewhere else though, I'd have likely talked to her and, if she bit, pursued her. Her walk was quick, confident, sexy. Her hair was a clear bottle blonde, and she'd clearly used a curler to add some wave. Her nose was too big, but her eyelashes were long and luxurious, and her lips were bright red, so I didn't stay focused on her nose long.

Her breasts were pert; though I've been with girls with breasts like hers where you take the girl's clothes off and discover those breasts are 90% bra. Her stomach was flat and her legs looked strong, so that was real, though there wasn't much to her butt. Even still, in her form-fitting yoga clothes, she looked good.

I passed through the perfume wake she trailed behind her as I continued my way down the street, and when I inhaled her sent my pulse quickened a second time.

And I thought to myself "That girl is far more ordinary, in her face and body, than plenty of more beautiful women I've seen already today. Yet, she excited me in a way none of those girls did."

What worked for her will work for you as well.

Because the secret of how to attract women is the same for men as what women use to have that effect on men.

And just like women like that can attract you and me with certain irresistible attraction signals (even if we know how they're doing it), you and I can do the same to women, too.

Giving Women Permission Society Doesn't

give woman permissionWe've talked on Girls Chase before about the importance of giving women permission to desire you. Which might almost sound silly at first... she's a strong adult woman, she doesn't need a man's permission to desire him! Right?

But there are all kinds of rules women feel socially obliged to follow.

Most of these rules are unspoken... the unconscious rules of the social contract.

All a society is is rules and trust. People agree on (often unspoken) rules, and trust each other to follow and uphold the rules, and trust the society itself to be a fair one, based on these broadly understood but largely unspoken rules. During times of social upheaval, you actually get large numbers of people in violation of the unspoken rules, which leads to an erosion of trust in the society, and a schizophrenic society. If you're interested in the big picture, you can read my article on how the violation of long-standing intersexual rules has led to a collapse of trust between the sexes in the West. But this article is not about that.

What this article is about is the individual man and woman.

Namely, you, and a woman you like.

She's with you, she feels like there are things she 'has to' do, and other things she 'has to not do', and you want to shake her free of these constraints so she will join you on your exploits.

How do you break her free?

Do Not Compare Yourself to Women

women have it easier
"Women have it easier." Well sure, in many ways they do. But YOU are not in competition with women.

There is a thing I have seen online (not so much in real life, but perhaps I'm not socializing with the right guys for it in real life) where guys complain about how easy women have it or how much XYZ thing favors women.

I'll give a few examples of this:

  • "Women don't know anything about how hard it is to approach guys. Men approach THEM! Why do men have to do all the work?"

  • "Dating is all about what the woman wants. Men have to do all the work of planning and wooing and courting a girl. The man has to make all the moves. Then if he messes up, the woman walks! How is any of that fair!"

  • "The law is completely stacked on women's side! If a woman wants to screw a man over, she totally can! As a man, you are a second class citizen!"

Are these things true?

Well yes, they are. Men do have to do all the work of the approach. Men do have to do all the work of the date. Men do get ditched if they mess up with a girl, often (but not always. Girls will cut you some slack if they like you). The law does often favor women (though not quite to the extent most men's rights activists seem to think).

I guess if you are arguing for a change to cultural norms, or the legal system, it might be worthwhile to complain about this stuff and get a movement going.

If you're on Girls Chase though, I assume your primary objective is more success in the world as it exists, and not so much becoming a political activist to try to change the world.

You might well be a political activist too. But that's not why you are here.

If you're here, it's because you want girls.

And if you want girls, stop comparing yourself with girls.

Even Nice, Sweet Girls Like to Be Touched

girls like to be touched
Does it seem like nice, sweet girls exist outside of sexuality? They don't – they're sexual creatures too, even if it isn't always obvious at first.

Go through life as a man, and you will encounter different classes of women.

There is the flirtatious, outgoing girl it's easy to flirt with. She's a minx and you just know she wants you to touch her and hit on her. She loves the attention.

And there is the regular girl, who isn't so outgoing. She still flirts sometimes, and you feel like she 'can take it' if you get a little bit aggressive with her. You don't flirt with her or touch her as much as the aggressively flirtatious girl, yet you still do a bit.

Finally, there is the kind, sweet girl, who seems like such a nice person, completely not flirtatious at all. She is innocent; childlike. Even if she's a grown woman and very pretty, it feels somewhat wrong to you to flirt too much with this woman or touch her or be all that aggressive with her. It feels like she isn't about that; you're not sure she could 'handle that', and you certainly don't want to hurt such a sweet human being.

These perspectives on women have some truth in them, while still being flawed.

There's a reason many girls both of the ordinary regular girl variety and the innocent sweet girl variety end up with asshole bad boys, and part of the reason is these are the only guys who regularly ignore 'sweetness' or 'disinterest' signals.

What that means is that while assholes bother some women who aren't interested, they also make a lot more progress with those other girls whom more respectful men hesitate to flirt with, get sexual with, and touch.

What to Do When Women Titillate You

women titillate
Women will try to titillate you for fun, their own amusement, or to see what you'll do. But you can't respond by drooling, OR ignoring them...

When I was young, I always attempted not to react when women tried to titillate me. I knew they were trying to get a reaction out of me, and didn't want to give them the satisfaction of having got one over on me. I'd watched them do it to so many other guys: showing a little skin around a guy and having him flip out... grinding on his crotch on the dance floor and having him go nuts... mentioning something sexual around him and watching him chase.

But I also discovered that, past early high school or so, you also couldn't just ignore a girl's attempts to titillate you and hope for her to drop that and just openly pursue you, either. Instead, if you didn't respond at all to her titillation, she'd assume you weren't interested and move on.

Once I realized this, I had to figure out: how do you respond to a woman's titillation enough that she knows you're interested, but not so much she thinks she 'has' you and loses all interest?

Do Seducers Seek Women's Approval?

seeking female approval
If you go out to flirt and talk with women, and you set up dates, and have sex, does that mean what you’re really after is female approval? Well, yes and no.

There is this argument that resurfaces every so often from the MGTOW/MRA/incel crowd. The argument is that by approaching women, flirting with them, asking them out, and sleeping with them, you are engaged in approval-seeking behavior. A seducer is the ultimate 'approval seeker', by this logic, because he devotes even more time to seeking out women to date and bed than an ordinary guy.

It's an interesting argument.

At its core, there is truth. There's a fair bit of approval seeking among some chunks of dating men. And in general, any public activity you engage in to any extent involves at least a little approval seeking.

Speaking to another human is always going to be a form of approval speaking: you want this other human to acknowledge (and approve of) your thoughts, perspectives, point of view. (If you don't think that's the case, then find me one person who has no reaction when his thoughts or perspectives are rejected and mocked by another individual. Such a man is very rare.)

You want to feel (in the language of today's progressives) validated (approved of) by others.

How to Get Fast Sex and Pick Up Girls Quick

fast sexIn my last article, I talked about putting in your practice to get good with girls.

Let's take a break from all this practice, and grinding, and gradual improvement. What if you just want to hook up with a girl... as soon as possible?

One of the things we discussed last article was going out in 'make it happen mode', and how if you know what you're doing you can actually pull this off.

On my article "I'm Doing Everything to Succeed with Women but It's Still Not Working!", Bizzy comments:

But I have a question: have you ever done an article about how to get sex the fastest way, without doing dates, online dating, chatting and all that stuff? I mean like, only cold approach a woman and then having sex immediately?! I used to do this in my early 20s and was actually successful a few times, but now I am older and don't feel like approaching 100 women to get a few lays. I want to approach just a few women that I think I have a shot with and then close the deal. I am just lazy now, I am sick of dating, talking, pretending and all that. Women notice me, they smile and look at me but I really don't like to take them out on dates, I just would like to take them home and have fun, like when I see a hot girl in a store.

This is sort of one of the Holy Grails of seduction, and it's not usually something you will consistently pull off. So just be aware of that going in.

However, it is indeed something you can do.

Today, we're going to talk about it.

Pickup Practice

pickup practice
If you have a little trouble approaching (or sticking with it after the first few approaches), just switch yourself over to “pickup practice mode.”

There are three different 'going out modes' a guy can be in when he might meet girls:

  1. Just hanging out mode
  2. Make something happen mode
  3. Pickup practice mode

One of the major differentiators between different skill levels of seducer is what mode the guy gets 'hung up' in. Because to do truly well with women you want to be able to use all three.

Signs She Likes You: Puts Her Phone Down or Away

she puts her phone down
In a world where everyone’s noses are glued to their phones, a woman lowering her phone around you can be a telling sign she likes you.

Ever since smart phones became ubiquitous, guys on seduction forums have had a selection of similar questions/complaints:

  • "Girls are too absorbed in their phones to approach!"
  • "How do I get girls to take their head phones out?"
  • "I can't get approach invitations anymore, women don't even look up now!"

Several nights ago I walked down the street and marveled to myself at how ubiquitous it was: men and women of all ages, young and old alike, totally entranced by their smart phones. Smart phones aren't some 'young hip thing' that all the kids are on and the old folks haven't clued into. Everyone is.

Every solo person I passed on the street had his nose glued to a phone, or, in a few cases, didn't, but was talking to someone via earphones or a Bluetooth headset instead.

Even in some of the groups I passed, some or all of the people would have their phones out in front of them as they talked and laughed to friends.

That might seem like a major approach inhibitor if you came up in the old days where people were more, shall we say, present in their environment. How can you approach a girl when she's so occupied already?

I actually quite like the global smart phone addiction, for two reasons:

  1. It's a lot lower pressure to approach anywhere people have their phones out now (which is pretty much anywhere other than a dance floor these days), because bystanders are far more absorbed in their own cell phone adventures and pay even less attention to you

  2. You will find out pretty quick if she is going to be willing to ditch her phone to talk to you, or not. Which is about as big an obvious proceed/don't proceed sign as you're going to get (this makes it simpler to weed out the uninterested gals, who quickly return to their phones, from the interested ones, who zero in on you, or at least linger away from their phones)

However, I want to highlight one specific quirk of behavior you'll see with women on phones when they like you.

This is a sign a girl likes you that is pretty obvious once you're aware of it. You've likely seen it a bunch already, and are subconsciously aware of it. Well, now we're going to make it conscious, so you can act on it as soon as you see it.

That sign is that when she's awaiting your approach or engagement, she will put her phone down or sometimes may (gasp) put it away.

How to Seed Dates and Pulls Back Home

seed a date
It's easier to get a girl to agree to a date or to go to your place if what you suggest feels familiar to her. But how do you trigger that feeling of familiarity? By seeding your suggestion first.

Recently I spoke with a friend who's back in the field after some time off, trying to shake off the rust. He's gone on a lot of dates but had trouble closing the deal with girls. And he mentioned his usual process for getting alone with a woman right now.

What he's doing, typically, is taking girls on a date, then later going for a walk with them, only to 'just happen' to end up right outside his building. He'll then invite them up.

Except most of the time they balk. Other times they'll go up with him, but resist kissing, and leave soon after he kisses them or tries to. He started to wonder if he might not be asking women to make too big a decision ("Go into this guy's place and get intimate, yes or no?") on the spot.

So I reminded him about seeding.

Seeding is a tool you can use to make it easier to get women onto dates and back to your place (or you to theirs).

It works by making women feel 'familiar' with the thing you want to propose, by introducing it earlier, before the decision point. Seeding a request or invite before you make it removes the 'on the spot' feeling when you do propose something, so a woman does not feel as if she suddenly must decide whether or not to do something then and there.

If you know how to seed dates and pulls with women, and you seed often, you'll discover let-downs like my friend has, where you bring a woman by your place and invite her up, only to run into a 'no', largely evaporate. Instead you get girls to agree before you even start on your way, and find they're bought-in by the time you arrive.