Articles by Chase Amante | Girls Chase

Articles by Chase Amante

Tactics Tuesdays: How to Future Project

future projection
If you can future project, you can lead a woman to imagine you as a part of her future. This is no mythical trick -- it only takes words to do.

One of your prime objectives with a new woman is to have her think of you in a different way from how she thinks of other men. Most men to her are nameless, faceless strangers. Even if they're attractive, if she feels no connection to them, they'll struggle with her.

Yet once a woman feels a connection with you, and envisions the possibilities with you, it changes. She won't dismiss you out of hand. She'll consider what you say to her. She opens up to your suggestions.

One tactic to 'fast track' women envisioning themselves with you is future projection. To project something is to push it out and paint a picture of it. When you future project, you paint a picture of the future.

Paint a good-enough picture, and a gal can start to feel like the two of you are already close to something like boyfriend and girlfriend... even if you've only just met.

Don't Chicken Out with Women; "Next Time" Never Comes

dating next time

There are many common errors men make in dating. These errors sabotage in small ways or large ways with women. The errors put guys through endless frustrations... usually of their own doing.

We'll talk about an error today in the way guys often think about "next time." Because it's sort of a big one, but it's likely one you won't stop to reconsider too often.

If you sift back through your memories, I bet you will find instances where you thought "I'll do it next time." See a beautiful girl? "I'll talk to her next time." Talk to beautiful girl? "I'll ask her out next time." On a date with beautiful girl? "I'll ask her home next time." Home alone with beautiful girl? "I'll make a move on her next time." As soon as you read these, I know you know the thoughts are counterproductive. If you're like most men, you still have them sometimes anyway though, don't you?

What's not included are the 'next time' thoughts you don't have. Like "That girl rejected me, but I'll get it next time." Or "My approach sucked. Next time will be better." Or "It's all gone tits-up with this girlfriend. But I'll do things right with my next one."

Men have these 'positive next time' thoughts far less often than they should. Yet they are a key to staying sane in the moment, and heading off neediness before it crops up.

6 Ways Online Dating Compares vs. Meeting Women in Real Life

online dating comparison
Dating apps and online dating are a fast, low effort way to meet loads of partners. But are they a perfect substitute for real life?

Over the last 15 years, the way people use the Internet to date has changed, in some ways.

But in other ways, it's remained exactly the same.

The first time I tried online dating, in 2004, it was still sort of a new, fringe thing. There weren't that many people dating online. There were around 1,000 online dating websites at the time (844, according to Wikipedia). Today, according to Forbes, 1,000 new online dating sites open each year. Match.com and Adult Friend Finder were the big fish then (the founder of AFF, Andrew Conru, invented online dating in 1994). Scammers were already well established; a clever spam message from a gorgeous girl-next-door type with a phone number two digits short claiming she saw me on Match.com, where I'd recently deactivated my account, lured unlucky-in-love 2004 me into paying $50 to for some fake dating site before I'd figured out what happened. Online dating at the time had a reputation of being a place desperate losers and awkward weirdoes went to. If you tried online dating, there was probably a reason, and that reason was likely an unfortunate one.

Since 2004, I've tapped online dating to meet women in various ways. Online is a useful supplement, but it's always taken the back seat to real life for me. Of late though I've seen online dating and dating apps become a lot more prominent among men. Meanwhile the portion of their women guys meet in real life is falling.

This is not a good thing for men, for many reasons. You may not want to hear it, but swiping your way through a dating app and thinking you are doing "game" is often not going to lead you where you want... unless you have a very clear idea about what you want.

But it's not all bad news and gloom. Sometimes, the right dating app can be just what you need.

Today let's compare online dating and dating apps to meeting women in the real world. We'll compare along six (6) dimensions:

  1. Quality

  2. Quantity

  3. Intentions

  4. Effort

  5. Risk

  6. Satisfaction

Let's go.

Tactics Tuesdays: Be Busy When with Women

busy with women
Busyness can be very attractive to women. But to make it so, you need two things: flirtation and instruction.

Women like busy men. They find them attractive. This is because women like capable men, and busyness implies capability. If you're busy, you must have it going on.

You can't fake busy. Or if you try to, it won't come off well. There's too much nuance to being truly busy to effectively fake it.

However, if you actually are busy, there's a right and a wrong way to use your busyness with women. Use it the wrong way, and women will assume you aren't interested. Use it right, and you can up your attractiveness while making women invest more in you (and commit to the courtship).

How to Get Somewhere with a Girl: The Floors and Ceilings Method

how to get somewhere with a girl
It’s simple to get somewhere with a girl when you use the floors and ceilings method. Raise her floor, and raise her ceiling, and she will soon be yours.

I just talked to Alek about his neat new series on Female State Control. If you haven't read it yet, check it out (see the link).

When we talked about that, it brought up a way of thinking about how to get somewhere with a girl I've long had, but not discussed much. I've talked about it here and there, especially with deep diving and connection stuff. It's a sort of basic understanding of how progress with women works.

This understanding is what we might call 'The Floors and Ceilings Method'.

This method is very slightly complicated to understand. But not much. And once you have it, it gives you another dimension to understand male-female courtships with.

The method isn't limited to seduction. It also works with sales. It works with new friendship formation. Any kind of new relationship formation, especially where you want to get someone to do something, uses it. We'll focus on using it with women you like in this article, but it applies everywhere.

This is a simple method. I'll explain how it works, and you'll soon see how it applies to so many things.

Tactics Tuesdays: Leave Her Alone 2 Minutes

leave her come back
If you run into resistance with a girl, instead of plow through, step away a moment... to let her fix her resistance herself.

Usually when you meet a girl, you don't want to leave her. If you leave her, she might leave herself! Some other guy might dash in to steal her away. Her emotions toward you may cool. There's no telling what could happen.

So, you will tend to be with her straight through. Straight to the point you take her contact info, then say farewell. Or straight to the point you invite her home (then take her there).

Once she's home with you, you'll be at her side the whole time too. You want her to get comfortable with you, after all. She can't get comfortable with you when you're not there.

Thus, this tactic might seem a smidge counterintuitive.

Yet if you want to solidify her commitment to you, and get her to value you more, this one'll do that.

And all you have to do to use it is (at the proper moment) leave her alone for two (2) minutes.

Before You Can Learn, First You Must Deprogram Unhelpful Beliefs

deprogramming bad beliefs
Before you can put new beliefs in, first you must push past old bad beliefs that conflict. But what if you don’t even know you have them?

There are two sides to learning.

On the one hand, there's learning something new. This side is important. You need to learn new strategies to get what you want. You need new techniques. You must give yourself new mindsets, new behaviors, and new mental models. All this is vital.

There's another side though that's a lot more overlooked. This side is in many ways even more important than the first side (learning), because without it, the first side is tough or impossible. This second side is that of unlearning. It is the art of deprogramming.

Everyone knows when a cult member makes it out of a cult, he has to go through a long period of deprogramming. This is worst for children raised within that cult, where the cult is all they've ever known. People raised in a religion who reject that religion go through it. People raised outside religion who later embrace it go through it too. The unlearning -- the deprogramming -- is as crucial as and in many ways more crucial than the learning. Until a man deprograms himself of old beliefs, he doesn't have the room to take on much in the way of new ones.

Deprogramming lies at the heart of switching from an ineffective way of trying to get what you want to an effective way.

Yet, sometimes, some men are wholly resistant to deprogramming.

And when you can't deprogram a man, you can't reprogram him either.

Which is bad for all sorts of reasons, if his old program is not a good, useful, helpful one for him.

Secrets to Getting Girls: Unlocking Levels with a Woman

unlocking levels with women
Every step of the way in dating and seduction, women have 'levels' you can unlock. And once you've unlocked a level, it stays unlocked.

In the back of your head, in every courtship you have, you must aim to unlock new levels.

A woman you've slept with is far easier to sleep with again than a woman you haven't slept with yet. This is because you've 'unlocked' the sex level with her. This is just one level, but look at how big a difference there is between women you have slept with and women you haven't.

With the woman you have slept with, you've done it together. She remembers doing it with you. And she won't have nearly the resistance to doing it with you again that a woman who's never been with you will.

Every man realizes this... at least in principle. And at least with women they've already closed the deal with.

It's why men invest a lot more time and energy into booty calling ex-girlfriends and former friends-with-benefits than they do random women from social circle or work they haven't slept with. She might not be sleeping with you currently, but if she's slept with you before, she's a lot more likely to come for a shag than a girl who hasn't bedded down with you yet.

This principle of 'unlocked levels' is also why you see so many women hung up on their exes, even when they know the guy isn't what they want, even when they have seemingly better guys pursuing them they could sleep with (then date)... yet they go back to the ex anyway.

It's why women you hooked up with once back in high school or college, when you run into them 10 or 15 years later, are still significantly easier to bed than any random woman you've just met, all things being equal (e.g., commitment status, etc.).

Once you've unlocked the 'sex' level with a woman, it's permanently unlocked (more or less).

That doesn't mean just because you've slept with a girl before, you definitely can get a repeat at any point in the future. Sometimes doors close.

But it does mean it's going to be a heck of a lot easier for you with her than with a girl you haven't gotten intimate with yet. The doors you've opened are a lot more likely to stay open to you than random closed doors are to open on their own.

But it isn't just sex that works this 'unlock the levels' way.

It's everything.

Girls Who Want You, vs. Girls Who Are Bored-but-Available

available women

There are, in essence, two main classes of women you can hook up with.

The first class is the women who just want you. These women find you attractive (some, even irresistible), compelling, magnetic. There's something about you they like -- or there might be many things about you they like. They're fascinated by you the moment you walk up, or they've grown attached to you over time as they've gotten to know you. They like you, and they actively want to date you, spend time with you, connect with you, be in physical contact with you.

The second class is women who aren't particularly desirous of you, but they are available to you. Many of these women are just bored. Some of them may be available because they're out to rebel, and you fit the "If I hook up with this guy, I'll really be rebelling against Mom/society/my overbearing boyfriend" idea they have in their heads. Some may be available to you for revenge. For some it might be because they want to have an experience. In each of these cases, these women don't want you or like you so much as they want some guy... and you happen to be the best guy available who makes it easy for such a girl to satisfy her mission.

We've talked about this before on Girls Chase. But I really want to dive deep in this article on the girls in the second class.

Because a lot of guys don't even recognize how many women are out there like this at any given time. The fact is though, if you're good with girls, a lot of the women you get will likely come from this class.