Articles by Alek Rolstad | Girls Chase

Articles by Alek Rolstad

2 Strategies for Making a Move on a Girl

get laid make a move
You should never wait for a girl to make a move toward sex. That’s your job. These two move-making strategies will help you get the job done in most situations.

Should I pull the trigger? Should I make a move?

It’s a hard question. A question anyone in the field asks themselves often about girls – particularly if the girl is cute and the interaction seems to be going the right way.

So, what do I mean by pulling the trigger? It is making a direct move to push the interaction toward intimacy and sex. That big step depends on the situation, the girl, and you.

Making a move could mean:

No matter which one you are dealing with, it can be the gateway to the next level in your interaction.

If you fail to make a move, you will likely not get the girl. Reread this, because it is important:

“If you do not make a move, you will not get the girl.”

If you don’t make a move, three things will happen:

  • If you are lucky, the interaction goes stale – not forward but at least not backward

  • If you are unlucky, she will get bored or think you are weak and lose attraction for you

  • If you are very unlucky, she will bail and hook up with another guy. If your night truly is crap, she will do it in front of your face. But if it makes you feel any better, let me tell you that this happens to all of us

Now let's get to the finer points.

Why You Can Get Hotter Women with Same-Day Lays

same-day lays
Your best chance to have sex with a girl is on the day you first meet. Going for same-day lays will net you a better meet-to-lay ratio and even get you hotter girls.

Hey, guys. Today I have a follow-up to my post about the typical ways most guys meet girls (online and social circle). My conclusion was that men are usually shooting themselves in the foot by picking such strategies.

I will share an opinion that is likely not discussed much on the web and list several reasons why same-day lays can (1) get you laid more consistently, and (2) score you hotter chicks.

The reason we don’t see this discussed much could be that same-day lays may be looked down on by moralist forces. Women do not want to talk positively about it, as they take pride in “never having slept with a guy on a first date” (which is usually bull crap). Men, in the last ten years, have become more moralist than ever.

From my time on pickup forums, I have seen a decline in not only same-day lay reports, but also noticed that discussions seem to focus more on dates and second meetups. Why has the interest in pulling the girl right away declined? It is an interesting sociological question worth investigating.

But examining that trend is not my task for today. My task is to give you reasons why I believe same-day lays to be superior (in my opinion) than dates, or second and third meetups. By second meetups, I am referring to having sex with a girl the second time you see her, just to make it clear.

When I look at my own lay statistics, I've had much more success going for same-day lays than grabbing numbers and meeting girls later. I have had success with both, but my results with same-day lays have always been significantly better, even as a beginner and an intermediate. I started young, and banging girls at parties was my only option. So I had to focus on same-day lays because going on dates was not possible because I had nowhere to bring the girl (except when my parents were away).

But even later, when I got my own logistics, or at least the girls I met had their own place, I still had more success going for the pull the same day or night of meeting them. Here are my (rough) stats:

  • I lost my virginity with a same-day lay

  • In my first four years of sexual activity, approximately 75% of my lays were same-day lays

  • In my last three years, I only had sex with four girls for the first time on a second date. Yes, I have only been on four dates the previous three years. Think about that for a bit!

  • The hottest girls I have been with have been same-day lays

I will list why I believe same-day lays are superior; however, note that there is a certain bias about my results. I intentionally opt for same-day lays because I love them. I will also share the reasons why same-day lays are awesome. Hopefully, I will clear up some misconceptions. But first, let's get practical.

The Worst Battlegrounds for Getting Good with Women

getting good with women
Some dating methods are terrible for guys learning to attract the women they desire. If you’re learning game, do NOT focus on these battlegrounds.

I have noticed that many men are shooting themselves in the foot and purposely selecting battles and battlefields that are not beneficial for them when it comes to dating.

For example, when guys want to get laid, many will use:

With the right strategies and skills, you can find success is all those battlegrounds, but to be honest, all are relatively crappy compared to others available, especially for beginners.

Picking poor battlefields as the selected method for dating is also counter-intuitive – making this not only more difficult for themselves but also limiting their results and making the process much more frustrating.

This post is partly meant to express some frustration I’m experiencing and answer many commonly asked questions. This post will hopefully clarify my thoughts on simplifying the process of getting laid and finding girlfriends, and help guys make the best use of their time and energy.

Let’s get right to it.

Should You Use Direct Game or Indirect Game to Get Girls?

direct vs indirect game
Some pickup artists swear by direct game. Others prefer indirect game. Some guys mix it up. This article is meant to help you decide what is best for you.

Hey, guys. Since we are beating dead horses lately by discussing natural vs. technical game, and inner game vs. outer game, I decided to beat another dead horse, which ironically, I have not seen being discussed much on the blog.

It’s interesting that after almost seven years of writing, I’ve decided to cover the subject bloggers and coaches tend to write their first articles about.

Well, I guess it is never too late, and I am sure some are probably curious about my take on it.

The Problem with Being Authentic when Picking Up Women

authenticity and pickup
We all want women to like us for who we are, but when it comes to picking up girls, there are times to be authentic and times to be technical.

In this final article in my series about debunking useless or counterintuitive schools of thought, we will discuss authenticity.

So far we have discussed the failings of:

Today we will go over a newer phenomenon which I have seen mentioned often lately, even here on Girls Chase – and that is the obsession with “authenticity.”

Yes, it is very important for many guys to seduce girls in a way that is authentic. But it’s not unusual that those who seem to stress authenticity are usually beginners or lower intermediate players. I have never seen such a subject discussed by more advanced seducers. Never.

In this post, I will point out the value of authenticity, but also how it can be a waste of your time and effort.

The Failings of Natural Game – Why Technical Game Is Better

natural game and getting girls
Many seduction newbies get sold on “natural game” because it seems so appealing and, well, natural. But its shortcomings vastly outweigh its value for getting girls.

Since we have been discussing the trends of inner game and debunking certain misconceptions, I decided to write a follow-up on a closely related subject that took the seduction community by storm.

The subject we will discuss is natural game – the idea that pickup and seduction has to happen naturally, depending on who you are, your vibe, and your personality.

Sounds appealing right? It surely does to many, but there are some flaws to this system. I see pickup and seduction as a skillset, with tools to use. Sure, long term it will affect you and how you see women and the world, but initially, pickup and seduction is – a skill.

Natural game looks very appealing to many newer guys for some reason. But there is a reason for why most advanced or skilled guys laugh at it.

In this post, we will try to understand its limitations but also why it became popular in the first place, to truly understand its roots.

Does an ‘Outcome Independence’ Mindset Really Help Get You Girls?

outcome independence flaws
The term ‘outcome independence’ has become a popular topic in the seduction community. But the concept is flawed, as it can trip you up when it comes to getting results.

Hey, guys. Today I’m discussing a common but tough mindset – outcome independence – the idea that the seducer must become stoic, and not care about his results.

I will play the role of skeptic here, as I have a few concerns about the concept. Mainly that I believe a lot of guys are taking on the mindset but not understanding how to use it properly to get results. Instead, they’re using the mindset as more of a cop out.

Nevertheless, I believe the mindset is well-intended. If the underlying mechanism is understood, it can make you appear cool and not needy.

In this post, I’ll explain why this mindset was popularized, delve into its shortcomings, and propose an alternative that I find superior for actually getting results.

The Inner Game vs. Outer Game Debate

Inner Game versus Outer Game
What’s more important, inner game or outer game? Both serve a purpose, but how and when you focus on each has a big impact on your understanding and success in pickup.

Hey guys.

Today I will share a reflection on the subject of “inner game.” I will be frank; I was not a big fan of the trend back in the late 2000s when the pickup industry moved away from technical seduction into a more “self-help” oriented approach, looking at how you think and feel, rather than what you should do.

In my opinion, the discussions on forums were better when there was a technical approach because people could more easily analyze what worked and what went wrong in particular situations, and individuals could fine-tune their approach and increase calibration.

With the focus on inner game, things got blurry. It became more difficult to discuss what worked and what didn’t. The concepts were vague and abstract, making them hard to prove and falsify. Theories became philosophical rather than scientific.

As a result, newbies grew more confused, and it was harder to help them because what these guys needed was specific advice on what to say and what to do when dealing with women – not telling them how they should think or feel about it.

The quality of posts went down, and it's amusing that many newbies were swearing to this new paradigm then. Yet most of them didn't really get results.

There is a reason for why technical game is making a comeback – because it works, and it tells you what to do. It allows people to share their tricks and to have others discuss and fine-tune them. It allows for innovation and new thinking.

I suspect that this inner game paradigm was, in a way, a response to the overly robotic aspect of the community’s early days. But just because these concepts became a bit too robotic doesn’t mean that going to another extreme is a good call. But that is what happened.

Nevertheless, the discussion today will be the good old debate of inner game (mindsets, realities, and understanding) versus outer game (hard pickup tech).

It’s a debate that is almost as old and tiresome as the “direct” versus “indirect” game argument. I have taken the liberty to write this piece because most people doing the debating have little experience (such discussions are keyboard jockey magnets), and I feel that many are still confused on the subject.

The points I will make are thoroughly subjective but built upon experience. Hopefully, you will find my arguments convincing, and I believe them to be strong – but they are just opinions at the end of the day.

Will That Girl Be Hard to Get? Why You Never Really Know

is she hard to get
Are your biases keeping you from approaching girls based on their looks or personality, when in fact those things rarely determine whether she’s hard to get?

Hey guys, and welcome back. Last week we discussed whether getting laid was easy or difficult. We looked at different factors that determine the ease or difficulty of getting laid.

Our conclusion was that it differs – getting laid can sometimes be super easy if you get lucky, and super hard if the world is working against you.

We then concluded that what is truly difficult is getting laid with high-quality women consistently. In my opinion, this can only be attained by being a celebrity or practicing pickup full time (the latter is the easiest way). Whether or not that is your goal, resources like this website will help you get lucky more often with better women. How far you want to take it is up to you.

Today’s post is dedicated to beginners – as a motivator. Many beginners may agree with my points from last week but intuitively feel that something is off. Here we have someone who has been practicing pickup for over ten years telling them pickup is not necessarily hard (although not “easy” as some may claim), yet their experience says otherwise because their skill level is low. That is normal. The better you become in any field, the more natural it becomes.

But for beginners, things can seem hard, especially if your last encounter required a lot of work.

And yes, as stated last week, certain interactions, with certain women, on certain days can be harder than others. That is also normal. It does not mean that their next lay will be as hard. There is no guarantee of that. It could be harder, and it could be easier. You never know what the future will bring.

But let’s get objective for a bit (or at least try to). The truth is, many beginners miss-assess the situation and would perceive certain women as more difficult than others, when in fact they are not.

This post is meant to discuss this phenomenon and challenge certain biases which many men have – especially beginners. This post has a very optimistic feel to it, and you probably will be left with a more optimistic view when dealing with future encounters.

More experienced seducers may also enjoy this post.

Is It Easy to Get Laid... Or Is It Hard?

is getting laid easy or hard
Depending on who you talk to or the forums you read, you’ll find guys who say getting laid is hard, while others insist it’s easy. Here’s the real low-down on that.

Is getting laid hard? It’s a commonly asked question, and I see a lot of disagreements regarding this on the forums. For some reason, many guys are also curious about how easy or hard it is to meet women.

Practically speaking, this question does not really lead you anywhere, as the answer will not impact results much.

But what I will try to do in this post is to give you an objective view (which will not be easy) on how hard meeting women and getting laid really is. This is just an opinion from someone who has practiced for 12 years, going out consistently and meeting many different women in different circumstances and places.

First, let’s talk about some subjective factors at play.