Why I Quit Dating Girls Who Club, Party, or Drink | Girls Chase

Why I Quit Dating Girls Who Club, Party, or Drink

Chase Amante

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girls who partySomething I've been asked from time to time on this site (most recently in a forum post by one of our members here) is why I don't date girls who club, party, drink, or have "girls' nights out".

The questions you most frequently get about this are:

  • Doesn't every girl do these things?

  • Who cares if she goes out and does a little drinking? I trust my girl to stay loyal.

  • Aren't you a hypocrite if you do these things but expect her not to?

  • Don't you trust your women to stay faithful to you? I thought you wrote in the article on how to prevent cheating that it was possible to be so great a partner than women wouldn't want to cheat?!

Most of these thoughts come from rather different places than where I come at relationships from, though. These thoughts revolve more around fear of loss, and/or a feeling of helplessness to control for or select against this behavior... neither of which I have.

This article will not be terribly helpful if you're still just starting out on your journey to get good with women, or are intermediate there, because you will not be able to follow it. Real screening is dependent on the ability to say "no," and until you reach the place where you truly have absolute abundance with women, there will always be women where your logic will say, "I'm not so sure about this one..," but your emotions will hit the override button and tell you, "Stop being silly - she's great."

So let's talk about why I recommend steering clear of these kinds of women if you want a stable, healthy relationship that is a boon to your existence, rather than the bane of it.

Chase AmanteAbout the Author: Chase Amante

Chase woke up one day in 2004 tired of being alone. So, he set to work and read every book he could find, studied every teacher he could meet, and talked to every girl he could talk to to figure out dating. After four years, scads of lays, and many great girlfriends (plus plenty of failures along the way), he launched this website. He will teach you everything he knows about girls in one single program in his Mastery Package.

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Comments

Justin Eubank's picture

Wish I had read this 5 years ago. The girl i was with said she only drank and smoked weed. Caught her using meth, using my car to sell meth from, and on my birthday she disappeared at the bar we were at, wouldn't answer any texts, lost her keys and tells me the next day she found them in the back seat of her male coworker's car. Threatened to kill me in my sleep, threatened to burn the house down with me in it, then tried to have me arrested for theft when I moved out after telling me the day before that i could take whatever i wanted. Don't get into relationship s with drug users either because very few people only use marijuana.

Shaun's picture

Hi Chase,

I'm going to be honest with you, I'm young, and so I am what many people would call Naive.

My girlfriend is awesome, she takes care of me, encourages me, and wants me to do well for myself.

But I have a dilemma, she hates "the system". She doesn't want to work all her life, and what not. I'm on 26.5k at 18, so not a pretty good salary for my age. She constantly expects me to buy her things, not like Jewlery and all that, but Food and hygiene stuff and that lot. Now, she's at College, and doesn't have a Job, so I don't know what to think.

But one of the worst things for me is probably the fact that, as much as she's just turned 18, she constantly wants to go out clubbing! Every Thursday, and then at the weekends she wants me to go out! I work extremely hard in the week, and I don't really want to go out, I'm more of a chilled pub kind of guy, but anyhow. She constantly wants to go clubbing, and I feel boring because I don't necessarily want to. I have a lot going on in my life, and in recent months the relationship has been a bit rocky... I mean one night when we both went clubbing, she kissed me and then said " Oh good you are the right person" and I flipped my shit as you can imagine, considering she was going to Ibiza one week later! Then, one night I did not want to go out with her and her friends to McDs, because I had just driven an hour and a half to see her, after working a 9-5 shift on 4 hours sleep. We had a massive argument, and later on I find that she's told her friend that I am being controlling at the moment.

Sometimes the lack of understanding / appreciation for what I do does really hit me hard.

We spoke and all that, but I want your view on what I should do!

Thanks

Legend

Jimbo's picture

In case Chase doesn't respond, here are my two cents.

Arabs have a saying: "He who eats my food heeds my word." It's a variation of the "he who pays the piper calls the tune" adage, but food here is more appropriate to your case.

What you're saying is that you have responsibility towards her, but without the authority that usually comes with it. There's a word for guys like that: suckers. And while she might take advantage of such a guy, she won't respect him or even feel that much sexual attract towards him for it.

If you're gonna provide for a girl, or for anyone for that matter, then you're gonna have some decisional power over that girl. And that definitely includes, "No you're not going to that party tonight."

Responsibility goes hand in hand with authority, and the more of the former you have the more of the latter you should have.

Good luck.

Ridz's picture

I just have this site for people to go to as everyone who reads this seems to think girls who go clubbing have character flaw. I do not think that reading the following article will help broaden their views and horizons. If only it was that easy. But one can try, right ? This is the site anyone can open and read it thank u.

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/comments/1a7qzj/why_do_girls_like_goin...

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