Newly single? In a rut? Or maybe you're just on the prowl and looking for a girlfriend? Whatever the reason, there's never a better time to get out and start meeting girls than right now. Not tomorrow. Not the next day. Not this coming weekend. Now. Tomorrow never comes, goes the saying. Right? Well, the saying is correct. Guys who put off meeting girls until tomorrow -- "I'm not feeling like it tonight, I'll go out tomorrow," very often end up putting it off tomorrow, too. And then eventually they end up sitting around thinking to themselves how hard it is to meet women. Well, of course it's hard -- from your couch! You need to be out there where the people are -- and, more specifically, where attractive young women are.
The good news is, if you live in even a decent-sized city, there are more likely than not tens of thousands of women your age in town. Which means tens of thousands of opportunities for you to meet girls you like. But where to start? To help you figure out where you want to begin your search, I've assembled a list of some common -- and not so common -- places and angles to meet the women you're looking for. Without further ado, let the count down begin.
Class can be a great place to meet girls. It offers the advantages of putting you constantly around the same group of people -- giving you ample opportunity to show the different sides of yourself, and an abundance of occassions to talk to a girl and ask her out. On the downside, there's not a lot of turnover -- not many new girls -- and it can sometimes be difficult to catch a moment alone with a girl to build a connection or ask her out. You want to be social with the class, but pay her a good amount of attention and conversation time too. Try to sit next to her or work on a project with her if at all possible; failing that, catch her on the way out of class. Sometimes girls will hover around the exit at the end, waiting for you to leave before they leave too. Take a cue from that and do the same yourself if you're the first one out, or look for them waiting for you.
Make sure too that you're taking a class that attractive women sign up for, too. Physics 101 or Woodshop need not apply. Think more along the lines of Spanish I, Acting, Photography, Journalism, or Bartending classes. Many classes let you audit them before signing up for good -- go check it out and see if there are any cuties. Of course, make sure you're taking the class because you want to learn the subject, too! Nothing worse than being bored in class and attending just to try and meet girls. But if it's something you're interested in, class can be a great place to meet girls.
A few years ago, the only girls you could find online were ones you probably didn't want to date. Not so anymore. Nowadays, every girl and her mother (literally) is online looking for her next date. Dating sites have specialized, offering every kind of dating available -- from sites catering to folks looking for quick flings, to religious sites looking to arrange long-term relationships, to culture-specific sites helping daters meet others from their same culture in a foreign land. Whatever it is an online dater is looking for, it's probably out there.
There are a few tricks to online dating. First, you need a great photograph or two. It pays to get your hair done professionally, dress sharp, and have some professional pictures taken, preferably in natural light and with a sexy look -- tired eyes and a wan, seductive smile. Online is the one place where looks matter most -- without great pictures, you fight an uphill battle. A guy with good pictures and a guy with bad pictures can have the same exact profile, but one will get bombarded with messages and the other gets nary a peep. Post your pictures on HotOrNot.com to get an idea of which of your photographs people find the most attractive.
Another trick is that your profile needs to be short, brief, friendly, and to the point. It also needs to be packed with interesting information about you that women can relate to -- for instance, what sport do you play? Do you play a musical instrument? Where have you traveled? Do you cook? What's a self-deprecating story you can tell -- something both interesting and humbling? She needs to feel that you're both a fascinating individual, and a down-to-Earth, relatable man. A challenge, yes -- but when you get it right, online dating can be a great tool to compliment meeting women in real life. And never overlook the value of a Facebook or MySpace page -- keep your profile there short and make sure you have lots of pictures of you doing fun things with lots of people (guys and cute girls).
8. Grocery Stores
If you only use grocery stores for buying food and toiletries, you've been missing out on a whole nother function they are prime to serve: that of meat market -- and not just for slabs of raw beef at bottom-barrel prices. Every girl in your town goes to the store to by groceries. She may be a homebody who never goes to bars, clubs, social events, or classes, but she has to eat sometime. And this is where she comes to do her shopping.
Conversation can be easy to start in grocery stores. You can engage her with genuine interest -- start by complimenting her sincerely on something you genuinely like about her, and follow up immediately by introducing yourself. Or, you can comment on something in her cart (like how unhealthy her cart looks, and it's a good thing she threw that cabbage in there to balance it all out!).
Shop at grocery stores where cute girls shop. Trader Joe's and Whole Foods consistently have a lot of pretty girls. And if you're into women of a different background, check out ethnic grocery stories -- Latin, Japanese, Chinese, Thai, and Korean grocery stores are common in a lot of coastal towns, and quite often have girls from those cultures roaming the aisles.
7. Coffee Shops
Coffee shops are fun in that you'll find a lot of cute girls here alone, reading or doing homework. Look for the trendy places in your town -- Panera or Cosi are big ones. Starbucks still gets the job done from time to time, though its "cool factor" has gone down as its become so mainstream. Check out different coffee shops in your area and find the ones where women gravitate.
Meet girls in line, or set up shop at a table next to the one a cutie is using. Or, if you're really bold, ask her if that seat is taken -- and tell her you hate to drink alone.
6. Social Events
Whether it's your alma mater's alumni gatherings, or a Meetup.com group, or a young professionals organization, or a political get-together, or a charity event, or anything, many social events attract young, attractive women, and provide an instant social context about which to start a conversation and talk for a little while. Women often go to social events looking to make new friends -- or meet new guys. Be sociable, meet lots of people at the event, make yourself seen and heard, and you'll often even find women gravitating toward you as the event rolls on.
Tired of party girls? Bookstores are a great place to meet intelligent, educated women. The big ones -- the Barnes & Nobles and Borders of the world -- often have multiple levels and offer a small coffee shop / eatery on the second or third level. Meet a girl near the racks, and take her upstairs to grab a cup of Joe or a milkshake and grab a seat and chat. Just don't ask her if she's read any good books lately!
The best thing about bookstores is that the women here are quite often by themselves, and they're in a good position to have a more intelligent conversation, if that's your thing. So if you prefer conversation to partying, bookstores are always a solid choice.
The thing that makes meeting women at nightspots easier for a lot of people is that women go out EXPECTING to meet new people, and new men. Some of them go out with the expectation they'll hook up that night. Others go out just wanting to party and have fun. Still others are dragged out by their friends and would rather be at home watching a movie. Still, regardless of the reason they're there, they know they're going to be running into people looking to meet new people.
The thing that makes meeting women at nightspots harder is that because women expect to meet new people, their guard is up. They know most of the guys they're meeting really could care less about them as people, so they tend to be reserved. It's your job as a man interested in her to get past that reserve and get her comfortable with and interested in you.
Note: it's rather unlikely you'll find a woman of the kind of quality you want to date at a nightspot. Most relationship-quality women don't visit these places a whole lot, or at all. It's still possible you'll meet one here or there, just very uncommon.
There are differences between different kinds of venues. Here are a few:
Bars often cater to groups of friends looking to put back a few pints and talk and relax. The key to doing well in bars is to roll with a group of fun, outgoing, preferably LOUD people, and add people and girls to your conversations (and group) as you move along.
Lounges are low-key, more conversation-focused, and often darker. They have a more sexual, seductive quality. There's usually more dancing at a lounge than there is at a bar, but less so than a nightclub. Go to a lounge on a night where your energy is not quite up to the level of a bar or a nightclub.
Nightclubs are loud, dark, intense places where people are most focused on dancing and being in the moment. It's important that you're very decisive and confident in nightclubs. Being social helps too -- women in nightclubs are very attuned to the people around them, as well as the perceived status of those people, and if you're meeting a lot of people and having conversations and flirting with girls, they pick up on it and want to meet you. When you go in to say hello, they receive you more warmly if they've seen you working the club than had they not. This is true of bars and lounges too, but it's most true of nightclubs, where everything is exaggerated and perception is at least a little distorted.
Parties combine the fun and meet-new-people atmosphere of a bar or a nightclub with the comfort of meeting friends and friends of friends instead of strangers. Girls here are open to meeting new people, and their guards are lowered as people at a party tend to be considered more likely to be normal and trustworthy.
If your desire is to escalate fast with the girls you're meeting, parties are a well-suited to your goals. Meet them, talk a little, dance a little, and then grab a phone number -- or take them by the hand and lead them to the back room.
Complete lack of social accountability. In other words, vacation offers a woman the chance to let off steam, let her hair down, and do things she'd never do back home for fear of it getting back to her friends and hurting her reputation. So you can find women who might otherwise be professional and conservative doing some pretty crazy things when they're off somewhere far away.
The best places to meet girls on vacation are the ones where young people are gathering to get wild. Cancun for Spring Break, Rio de Janeiro for Carnival, Koh Phangon for the Full Moon Party, Munich for Oktoberfest -- all great places and events to meet a lot of girls who just want to have fun.
1. The Street and Public Transportation
Sometimes one of the toughest places to meet women, but also one of the most rewarding. Meeting women on the street can be hard, especially for beginners -- there's a lot that can go wrong in the beginning, and small margin for error. However, you'll frequently find the most beautiful women completely alone -- women whom if you saw them at a nightclub at all would probably be surrounded by a cadre of friends and followers (and who might very well not even go to nightclubs). And meeting women in public transportation -- on the train or the plane, for instance -- is often easy (they're frequently alone, and are happy to have someone likeable to talk with) and convenient, especially if you travel by mass transit a lot.
If you're looking for a new girlfriend, the street during the day may very well be your best bet. You're most likely to stumble upon quality women out and about completing their daily errands, and a phone number from a solid daytime interaction is likely to be more reliable than a phone number from a well-run nightspot conversation.
Final note on meeting women during the daytime: genuine interest tends to work best here. No sense dancing around why you're there to talk to her, or trying to act disinterested. You've walked up to her in the daytime because you think she looks good and you want to find out more about her -- that takes cajones that most men don't have, and women respect you for that.
Runner Up: Salsa
Had to throw in here. Salsa lessons and salsa dancing sessions tend to attract a lot of very cute girls in most major cities, and a sizeable chunk of the women who go are there looking to meet guys. You don't even have to dance if you don't want to -- a lot of the success stories I know of men meeting women at salsa bars come from men who were just relaxing at the bar and met the women between (or after) lessons.
And that wraps up the list. I hope you've found it useful, and learned a thing or two -- maybe even discovered a place to meet girls you hadn't thought of or visited before.
Until next time -- game on.
Read next: “Where to Find an Amazing Woman: 20 Surprising Places”