Secrets to Getting Girls: Move Faster
We’re starting a new series of articles intending to highlight some little-known or under-discussed topics in the world of dating and seduction, called Secrets to Getting Girls. This first edition is focused on how fast you move through an interaction with a girl you like, from the time you first meet her until the moment you’re sleeping with her. Hope you enjoy.
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Ever have an interaction going really well, with a girl really into you, but then it starts fading, dying away, and eventually she excuses herself and leaves?
You need to move faster.
Ever have a girl chasing you hard, calling you and texting you often, but then after a while the attention dies down, her attraction for you seems to wan, and she even stops responding to your calls and texts?
You need to move faster.
Ever have a girl at your place, into you, maybe even saying sexual stuff or doing sexy things, and you want to make sure the timing’s right so you wait for the right moment, and wait, and when you finally go for it she pushes you away, acts uncomfortable, and eventually leaves?
You need to move FASTER!
Why do girls act into guys, then leave them hanging? Why was she leading you on? Why did she act attracted, put sex on the table, then take it away? It’s because with every woman, there is only a limited window of opportunity to take things and run with them. When she’s still feeling you out, she’ll be tentative and experimental, putting her feelers out there. The men who take action and make things happen are the ones who find success with women.
Look at these famous, well-known sayings:
Fortune favors the bold.
He who hesitates is lost.
Strike while the iron is hot.
I’m sure you can think of a couple more. Think about them as they apply to meeting girls. Who do you think gets more girls -- the guy who hems and haws when a girl shows him attraction? Or the guy who recognizes it when he sees it, and immediately starts moving things forward with his girl?
There is no place in seduction for a man to be tentative or slow.
At best, the slow, tentative man gets slotted firmly into boyfriend / husband territory. That means the girl in question will hold out longer, resist more, and demand more work and investment from him before she even thinks about putting out. She realizes he’s not a play-hard-or-go-home kind of guy, but if she still likes him anyway, she might just give him a shot at providing for her.
At worst, the slow, tentative man gets nothing. His girl loses interest and moves on, in search of a man who goes for what he wants.
We hear this often enough: women want STRONG men. Men who LEAD. Who TAKE ACTION and MAKE THINGS HAPPEN. But what we don’t hear so much is that you only have so long to SHOW her you’re that strong man who leads. You only have as long as her window is open.
SO, what can you do? How do you get yourself moving faster?
Here are a few ways to light that fire in your belly, and get yourself moving faster than ever:
• Any time you feel like it’s dragging on and not moving forward, realize that she’s probably feeling the EXACT SAME WAY, and do something about it. Move your interaction to the next level!
• Any time you want to take action, but feel that twang of doubt suggesting that maybe she’s not ready, or maybe she won’t react the way you want, stop, and remind yourself that if you don’t take action, now, when you have the chance to do so, you may very well never get another opportunity from her. Windows only stay open so long, so move, and move faster!
• Move her soon after meeting her. Met her on the street? In a bookstore? In a coffee shop? At a party? At a bar or a nightclub? Move her within ten minutes after meeting her. Faster, if possible, and she's responding well. Try to move every girl you talk to within ten minutes, maximum. The ones who don't want to move you probably weren't going to get anything productive out of anyway; if she seems REALLY into you but won't move (because of friends or some weird circumstance), grab a number and call her later. Hanging around does you no good. And the girls you get to move with you quickly will commit themselves to you -- and their interaction with you -- right away. The earlier this happens, the better.
• Be fast. Don’t wait to call a woman after you meet her. Text her a few hours after you meet her and tell her it’s great to make a new friend and sign your name. Call her the next day and build some rapport. Then call a few days later and ask her out. Get her out with you that same week!
• When she’s in your place, don’t hesitate. Be confident, suave, smooth. Be aggressive. No means no, obviously, but women don’t want timid men hoping they’ll make the first move, either. The first move is yours to make, and the longer you wait, the more awkward it becomes. So make it FAST!
It's crazy when you think about how many women guys lose by moving too slowly. If you're a cool, normal guy, who takes care of himself, grooms himself well, is friendly, outgoing, and sociable, with at least a little bit of sexiness and confidence about you, I guarantee you you will get a lot more girls by moving faster. Is it possible to move too fast? Yes -- depending (enormously) on the girl, the guy, and the situation. Different girls move at different speeds in different situations with different guys. But in my experience, the vast majority of guys lose girls by moving too slow. So, if you've ever had a girl who felt like a sure thing take off because you missed that window, don't get discouraged. Instead, take heed -- and next time,
Move faster!
Yours,
Chase Amante
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Update, 15 March 2010:
Be sure to check out this article's follow up, "Move Faster II", right here, for even more tips and techniques on moving faster with women.


Comments
Awesome man!!! I love every
Awesome man!!! I love every post of this website. Every post gives such valuable information that takes years of experience. Thank you very very very much..
Re: Awesome man!!! I love every
Hey, most definitely, Anon. Just trying to build a repository online and get some of this stuff out there before I get too old and start forgetting it, or get hit by a bus, or stabbed by a bunch of bandits or something ;) Happy to hear you're digging it -- and I'll keep trying to keep the content fresh.
Chase
Does the concept of moving
Does the concept of moving fast apply to a girl if she's in another relationship?
Re: Move fast if she's in a relationship?
Hi Anon,
Well, yes and no. Depends on what you're going for.
If it's your intention to sleep with her while she's still in that other relationship, then yes, move fast. Her relationship with another man doesn't really have much to do with the relationship between you and her; it's her decision whether that other man is enough for her, or whether she wants to have you both, but if you move too slow here there's a very real chance that what she's looking for (almost always a man who's stronger, more aggressive, and more arousing than her partner) she's going to decide isn't you. So speed is of the essence.
If you want to date her after she breaks up with her guy, your best bet is to rotate her to the periphery of your circle (see "The Secret to Hooking Up with Friends") and come back to her when she's single.
Chase
Chase First off great site
Chase
First off great site man keep doing your thing cuddos! Now my issue is not with the "easier" women or the ones I would say value themselves but moreover with the ones who are conservative and truly value themselves. I'm 20 years old and don't have my own place yet, so the lovemaking goes down in either my car or a hotel room! My question is how to approach moving a woman to either one of these places without offending her and coming off as if she is a slut. I'm always walking on eggshells with thus issue and wanted to know what your advice would be for "how to move a woman if your homeless" lol. Thanks in advance and keep up the good work!
P.s please excuse my writing, in the process of learning a touchscreen
Re: Getting girls in your car or hotel room
Hey Malcom,
Good question. Most important thing for getting women in your car or your hotel room -- whether they're conservative or not -- is simply being nonchalant about it and "assuming the sale."
e.g., the guy who asks a girl, "Hey, want to go to my hotel room?" won't do that well. But the guy who simply tells a girl, "Let's go," and ushers her off to the backseat of his car or to his hotel will fare much better.
The backseat of the car, if you get objections, tell her, "I just want to sit and talk with you. We don't have to do anything we don't want to do." Of course, once you're back there, she may very much want to kiss you... or more.
The hotel, if you get objections, just tell her, "This is just for us to chill. It's better than somewhere noisy and crowded."
Then -- lead away.
Cheers,
Chase
met a girl who was really into me
I met a girl who was really into me, unfortunately I didnt move fast enough and I think she lost interest a bit, I asked her if she wanted to hangou, through text (because I rarely rarely see her) she didnt text back. I want to try and find her to ask her in person. But I want to know if im wasting my time, if I should just move on and find some other girl. We go to the same college btw
Hello Chase, Got a question
Hello Chase,
Got a question for you. So theres this girl that use to flirt with me and I didn't realize it at first. But anyways were talking again and I told her to text me and she did. This girl has been around the block.... What is the best way to go about this from here? should I text her and ask her to come over this weekend and share some alcohol with me? thats what I was thinking,
Thank you
what about girls u meet online?
So i randomly msgd this girl on fb whom i've never met.
I just straight up messaged her saying she looks amazing and do you live this city. I got a reply that night and she said hi thanks and yes.
A few hours after that i told her that she was t she only girl who i've ever said that to and what she does for a living and how she likes it in this city. Now i'm thinking did i just ask her to reply all that to me? And then of course i never heard back from her. It's been 2 days and i'm pretty sure she saw the message. I agree with the whole moving along fast. Maybe that's where i screw up all the time but yet i don't wanna look desperate. I'm pretty good with opening up conversations but i always seem to fail closing the deal. I don't understand myself sometimes.
Should i keep trying with this online girl?
Public Venues
Ciao Chase,
I feel intimidated asking a girl out in public, or doing anything with her (in public). I want to save face, if you know what I mean. Can you give me some tips?
Grazie
"Weird Trick" by Scott Patterson
I received this in my mailbox under the subject line "One weird technique for seducing women but always works" and would like to know what your take is on the following article. It seems to be in complete opposition to your advice of moving faster, here it goes:
********
Today I want talk about a weird trick that creates
a seductive atmosphere with women.
At first, it might seen a little counter-intuitive.
But bear with me...applying this technique will
ALWAYS make her desire you more.
What is this trick?
It's CONTROLLING the pace of the relationshps you
have with women.
"Two steps forward, one step back."
This is a valuable lesson I learned over six years
ago from a dating expert named David Deangelo.
What he means is simple...
When dealing with women, you want to keep
progressing your relationships.
But every time you take it to the next level,
you want to pull back a little.
Why does this technique work?
Well, a woman typically doesn't like it when a
guy moves things too quickly.
Her natural instinct is to flee from any
relationship that gets "hot and heavy" too
quickly.
This is ESPECIALLY true when she thinks the guy
is only interested in sex.
By following the "two steps forward, one step
back" technique, you'll progress the relationship,
while giving her the space that she needs.
With women, it's actually better to move too
slowly than too fast.
As long as you're initiating the next step, it's
NEVER too slow.
For instance, say you're playfully flirting on a
date.
At some point you'll kiss her.
And after doing this for a few seconds, you'll
stop and go back to flirting.
This is the exact OPPOSITE of what a lot of men
do.
When kissing a girl, MOST guys will push the
physical escalation.
In other words, they try to turn that kiss into
a sexual encounter.
Unless she's looking for a one night stand,
behavior like this immediately puts her on the
defensive.
Instead of enjoying the moment, she's wondering
if you're only interested in getting
into her pants.
By kissing her and then pulling back, you're
demonstrating a few qualities of the naturally
attractive man:
1) You are physically attracted to her
2) You have self-control and restraint
3) You show confidence by NOT acting like a s
ex-starved teenager
A man who goes slowly in a relationship shows
that he understands the needs of women.
He knows that she wants to feel desired, but she
also needs her freedom.
He's naturally attractive because he's confident
enough to progress the relationship at a pace
that's comfortable to a woman.
Talk Soon,
Scott Patterson
Chick Magnet 101
Girls in your classes
Chase,
Just stumbled across your site and I have to say (you've heard this a million times) I wish I found it sooner! Im pretty much a beginner at the game but anyways I thought I'd share a story. So there was this girl in my class this fall who I really liked and I thought it was pretty obvious she liked me as well through her body language, etc, we ended up sitting next to each other every class we'd always make small talk after class, she introduced me to her sister on campus and generally seemed overly interested in what I had to say and smiled a lot. I took it she was into me. Anyways, I got her number after a few more class meetings and suggested we study for the midterm, she said "yeah we should! text me". So I didn't contact her until the next week the day before I wanted to meet up (mistake number 1?). She didn't respond until I was already in the library studying when I got a text that said shes sorry she didn't contact me back sooner and had to do blah blah blah. It sounded like an excuse but I said it wasn't a big deal and that I'd be back in the library in a few days if she wanted to join me then, responding to her in under 10 minutes (mistake number 2?). No response. Next time I saw her in class the next week I didn't say anything about it and acted like it never happened, she still seemed pretty interested. She would occasionally text me questions about class that she could have easily gotten answers to from the professor and responded to me pretty quickly. Anyways, the end of the semester came (still had small talk before and after every class unless she wasn't there that day) and I suggested we should celebrate the class being over and she said "I'm totally down to get drinks, text me" in a friendly way that seemed sincere. I texted her the day after the final asking what her plans were for next week and if she was still down for a celebratory drink and some stimulating conversation (mistake 3? too soon and too wordy?). No response, its been about 24 hours, Im going to wait at least until the end of tomorrow before I try again.
Now, after reading some of the articles on this site I realize I totally didn't move fast enough, mainly because I thought if I got involved with her early on and it didn't work out it would be way too awkward seeing each other in class week after week. Also it might have been my lack of texting game as well but basically, what is your take on girls in your classes? Should you still just move fast no matter what? Im guessing I totally blew it with this one, any insights or advice?
-Jay
Denver, CO
fb message
I like this girl, So I message her on FB to add me as friend, after she accepted, I read her status that she needed a ride to airport, so i message her that i would be able to take her if she wanted me too. but she never replied back, i think I messed up because .... i said " can u add me a friend please:)" and the second mistake was offering a ride to the airport. I really like her I dont know what to do next. I want to talk to her but dont know how..
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