Make Her Orgasm Hard from Sex in 8 Minutes or Less


I've had men ask me to write about my methods on how to make a girl orgasm since 2007, when I first mentioned the results I get with sex online... and I've always declined to write them.

I didn't mind sharing what I did to pick up a girl. That's just a process.

But sex... that's an experience. And I've somewhat jealously guarded how to create the kind of experience I like creating for women through sex.

make a girl orgasm

My goals with sex were the same as my goals with seduction: sex to me should be

  1. Powerfully effective,
  2. Efficient to execute, and
  3. Easy to do

Once I started working on getting sex down as a skill, I was able to give girls relatively hard orgasms within 10 or 15 minutes, on average. I gradually cut this down to about 5 to 10 minutes or so.

And right away, I was stacking powerful multiple orgasms from penetrative vaginal sex, one after another - the holy grail of sex performance for most men.

All those other guys out there were talking about giving girls orgasms with their hands or mouths... I laughed at that. I was giving them orgasms with ME.

And I didn't want to talk about it... because sex is the great differentiator. If everybody else knows how to do what I know how to do in the sack, well, all those rip-roaring orgasms I just gave her aren't really anything all that special... she can go get that from anybody.

But what I've realized over the years is, no matter how clear you make something for someone, no matter how simply you present it to him... if it requires even a little bit of work, most men are unlikely to ever use it.

If you use these techniques with the women you sleep with, it will change sex, women, and relationships for you forever.

But most men are never going to bother.

So, fears of getting out-competed by men using my own techniques against me set aside, I'm going to share with you how you can make girls orgasm hard, fast, and multiple times, using nothing but your member - and a little bit of work.


make a girl orgasm

I usually like to start off articles like this with some theory, so that you understand a) WHY we're doing things a certain way, and not another way, and b) how to improve on them yourself, and how to change courses and improvise on the fly when you find yourself in novel situations I haven't discussed in an article.

With a good grasp of the theory, you wind up not needing a whole lot else.

So here's what you need to understand about sex that virtually nobody tells you (because virtually nobody is aware) and that makes all the difference between being okay at sex and being rock star good in bed.


Sex Fundamentals

Just like attractiveness and seduction have certain underlying fundamentals that - if you're hitting these notes right - make these things a breeze, so too does sex.

Most of the sex fundamentals I learned as a teenager without ever having sex. At the time, I was trapped by my own social phobia without friends and without girlfriends or lovers, and I figured if I ever got a girl I really liked, then I REALLY wanted to make sure she didn't ever want to leave.

One of the keys to this, I knew, was sex.

More specifically, giving a girl orgasms. Lots of orgasms.

I heard a lot of things growing up, about how sex is something you're supposed to work through or talk about with your partner or whatnot, and it's important, but the bond between too people is more important. I never put much credence in the things people say though, and from what I could tell from looking at people's actual relationships, sex seemed to be all-important.

In fact, it seemed to be THE most important thing there was.

A woman could HATE a guy... but if he gave her incredible sex, she'd keep coming back for more.

Or, she might think a guy was the most wonderful fellow in the world... but if he couldn't perform, she'd soon be gone, off in the arms of another man who could.

So, I studied. I needed to be not just good at sex, but incredible at it, as soon as I got going.

I wanted to land on my feet as quickly as possible.

I learned how to give women orgasms manually, orally, and anally. I learned these so well, in fact, that the first time I ever gave a girl oral sex, she orgasmed quickly, and angrily called me a liar for telling her I was inexperienced. She never believed me that I'd never done it before, and never really trusted me after that "lie." I told her I'd just watched a video on giving oral sex; she told me no one gets that good from watching a video.

But most of all, I studied how to give women orgasms vaginally.

The stuff I was reading about the "G-spot" was a bit too complicated for me... I couldn't really figure out where it was or what to do with it (in fact, I've never really sat down to figure this out... Ricardus talks about it fairly in-depth in his article on how to be a good lover, though, and it does seem to be pretty useful).

I eventually decided that, based on everything I'd studied and read, these were the fundamentals of sex:

  1. Passion is key. Sex is every bit as much a mental and emotional experience as it is a physical one. Women had the most exciting, fulfilling experiences with passionate men... and by nature, I am one of the most dispassionate individuals you will meet. I knew I needed to simulate passion, and eventually learn it for real.

  2. Physical contact is best maximized. Another thing I suspected was extremely important was maximizing physical contact - getting your skin contacting as much of her skin as possible. This makes the sex much more personal, and much less clinical, and increases the release of pleasure and bonding hormones that occurs with skin contact between a man and a woman.

  3. You need both clitoral and vaginal stimulation. What I was reading again and again and again was that women wished more men would stimulate their clitoris during sex, and so many men were ignorant of this. Yet, the clitoris was outside and above the vagina... and I didn't want to be just using my hand or my mouth, because

  4. Penetrative sex is REAL sex. Just like she's not really your girlfriend if you're not having sex with her, it's not really sex if your penis isn't in her. Women know this, and while they enjoy men who give them orgasms with other parts of their bodies - tongues, fingers, hands, sex toys - these men aren't real men the way men who make women cum with their penises are. If you want to maintain a woman's respect and attraction at the uppermost levels - and in my mind, that's the #1 reason to bother giving her orgasms at all in the first place - you need to be making her cum with your penis, not your tongue / fingers.

  5. Rhythm is non-negotiable. Hidden deep within the tomes I was reading on sex, I discovered an emphasis on rhythm that seemed largely devoid from much of the lighter and more mainstream sex advice stuff I perused. Rhythm was why women found men who danced well sexy and suspected they'd be good in bed - and it was also why once a girl went black she didn't go back. Black men - on average - had rhythm; white men - on average - did not. I further learned that women enter a trance-like state during good, rhythmic sex, that is necessary for and precedes orgasm. The men shifting around and thrusting arrhythmically prevent women from ever entering this trance - and prevent them from ever climaxing, too.

  6. Dominance is mandatory. Women want to be taken... not asked. I learned that asking her, "Is this okay?" or, "Was that good for you?" are big no-nos that make you seem inexperienced and like you don't know what you're doing. A woman wants to feel like you know her body better than she does, and know what's best for her better than she does... she wants to be able to just relax, enjoy the ride, and let you do what you know how to do so well without having to worry or think about anything other than how good it feels and how good you are. You must know what you're doing, and tell her what to do / move her around dominantly and confidently and self-assuredly.

There were other things I found that were useful and important, like using your voice during sex, and doing things like gripping and pulling her hair (when behind her), smacking her butt, etc.

I also read about how important foreplay was - but I didn't consider that a fundamental, because my belief was that if you're incredible at penetrative sex, once you get there she'll be having so much pleasure she's not going to care if you didn't tease her for 15 minutes first.

I do use foreplay - sometimes - if I want to build up a girl's anticipation and get her cumming faster and harder than she would without it.

But it's certainly not mandatory. If you know what you're doing in bed, you can go in with no foreplay and still have her cumming hard in minutes.


Delivering the Goods

make a girl orgasmAt first, I was pretty average at sex. I ran into fairly normal guy problems like:

  • Girls weren't climaxing with me, except rarely (and weakly)

  • I was getting tired fairly easily (even though I worked out)

  • The sex was boring enough that women would sometimes start talking to me during it

... but then one day I needed to pull off a miracle.

I'd managed to pull off a remarkable turnaround with a gorgeous girl I'd wanted to make my girlfriend, who'd earlier decided she wanted nothing to do with me, and I'd managed to sleep with her while on a tour overseas with a bunch of other people.

But she still disliked me and thought I was no good (I was going a little too far with the bad boy image then and hadn't learned how to balance it right), and told me there was zero chance of us having a relationship or seeing each other after we got back from the trip.

I shrugged this off, trying to seem nonchalant, because if I knew if I chased her I was done for sure. But I knew I needed to give her a reason to keep seeing me after our return if I wanted her as a girlfriend - and the only thing I could think that could possibly do it was sex.

Except, I was pretty ordinary at sex.

So, on the last night of the trip, with her turned on and lustily grasping at me as we rode around town in a taxicab, I finally got her back to the hotel, and decided to try something new. I'd come up with an idea that would hopefully let me last longer without getting tired, maintain better rhythm, and give her both clitoral and vaginal stimulation at the same time.

I tried it out on her, and 10 minutes into sex, she achieved climax - hard. I couldn't believe it... I started grinning. And kept going.

Then she came again.

Then again.

Then again.

After the fourth orgasm - all right in a row - she breathlessly said, "I think you are the best."

Like a dork, I asked, "The best ever?" She didn't answer... she just came hard again.

And then again.

And then again.

After the seventh orgasm - by this point, she was screaming so hard I literally thought she was going to start crying, and I was afraid the hotel staff would break down the door thinking her limbs were being sawn off - she yelled, "I don't think I can LEAVE you!" and I knew I'd done it.

She came two more times, and then I finished.

We'd been having sex for only 15 or 20 minutes.

We ended up dating for 2½ years after that.


How to Make a Girl Orgasm, Hard and Fast

I don't know if there's a common name for this sex position; in the years I've shared it with close friends, I've had one person show me something that described the same position. I forget what it was called there.

I've never seen it anywhere else.

Well nigh everyone I've asked to try it out has reported having his girls orgasm off of it, usually on the first try. In fact, the first friend of mine who tried it out, I was hanging out in the other bedroom in his house when he did - he didn't know I was there - and I listened to him make a girl scream at the top of her lungs for five minutes.

Here's the position - I call it "adapted missionary," and it looks very much like this:

make a girl orgasm

The only difference between the position itself and the picture above is that normally you'll have your hands not holding her hands but holding her shoulders from underneath.

Here's how this differs from an ordinary missionary position:

  1. Forearm and elbow support. Ordinary missionary position entails a man raised up above the woman's body, supported by his hands and wrists. For obvious reasons, this is a pretty tiring position - it takes a lot of work to hold yourself up that much! When you're supporting yourself with your forearms and elbows instead though, you tire out much more slowly - and can last far longer. This also allows you to maintain much more control over your bodily motions, making it significantly easier to keep a steady thrusting rhythm.

  2. Full body contact. Unlike ordinary missionary, where you're holding yourself above the girl, in adapted missionary your body is on top of hers, creating a much more intimate experience, and prompting the release of more pleasure and bonding chemicals in her brain, increasing her enjoyment.

  3. Altered thrust angle. The one "complaint" I've had from friends who've tried this position out is that they enjoyed the sex somewhat less. That's because this position gives you a very "clean" angle of entry into a woman's vagina - you're going right in, with little in the way, which means less pressure on your penis shaft, and a bit less pleasure for you. On the other hand, it allows for deeper penetration, which means you more easily reach the back wall of her vagina with the end of your penis - and vaginal back wall stimulation is how you trigger the most powerful vaginal orgasms.

  4. Pelvic rubbing and clitoral stimulation. Because of the position your body is in, your pelvis slides back and forth against hers - stimulating her clitoris in the process. Rather than an up and down motion, like you'd have with a standard missionary position, where her clitoris gets virtually no stimulation, in adapted missionary this back and forth rubs her clitoris constantly.

  5. Shoulder grip for added oomph. As you get closer to orgasm, you'll want to thrust into her harder while maintaining the same rhythm, to hit the back wall of her vagina harder and to rub her clitoris harder. Because your hands are wrapped around her shoulders from behind and underneath, you're able to not just thrust forward, but pull her downward as well. This roughly doubles the strength you can thrust with, and is pretty exciting for her too. You can feel the difference just by letting go of her shoulders and thrusting, then grasping them and thrusting. Big difference in power.

Orgasms happen for me with this position with most girls within 8 to 10 minutes, maximum - often faster, when they're excited.

The neat thing about this position is that it takes care of everything for you, short of rhythm. Rhythm ends up being the only thing you need to concentrate on - everything else is automatic.

If you're starting off with standard white guy rhythm (that is to say, NO rhythm) like I was when I first began using this position, expect four to six months of sex several times a week while concentrating on rhythm to get your rhythm down tight. You'll struggle a bit at first, and she likely won't climax every time, but once you've got it down, you'll know how to make a girl orgasm like no one else she's ever met... or ever will meet.


make a girl orgasm

Let's say you've got adapted missionary down, and now you want to find more ways to make your girl climax hard and fast. What else is there out there?

In this section, I want to show you a couple of other sex positions that you may or may not have seen before, talk about how to make a girl orgasm with them, and review a few more tips that are generally going to make you better at sex and more adept at giving a fulfilling sexual experience to girls.


Legs Over Shoulders

One of the better positions for deep penetration in a girl is this one:

make a girl orgasm

You can do this similar to missionary, but with a girl's knees crooked over your shoulders. This one gives you great, deep penetration - which you may find is too much at the start of sex, especially if you have a longer penis.

Tips on this one:

  • The more you bend down over the girl (and the closer you bend her knees back towards her chest), the deeper the penetration you'll get with her, and the more exciting the position becomes because of the strain you're putting on her legs

  • If you have a large/long penis, try this one out, but you'll often find you can't use it until your girl starts getting reasonably close to climax, or else she finds this position too uncomfortable - she'll complain or pain or discomfort in her lower abdomen (that's you pushing too hard on her vaginal back wall). You may also sometimes find that while she'll have really powerful, exciting orgasms, she'll also be pretty sore after cumming this way, too

  • Some women enjoy this position more than adapted missionary, others less so - it depends on the girl. Try both with her, and see which one you get more miles out of

Legs-over-shoulders is typically best as a "finishing move" - once she starts getting close to orgasm, shift her into this position to make her cum harder.

Or, if you've already given her a few orgasms in another position, switch her into this one to keep the orgasms flowing by stimulating her in a newer and more powerful way.


Pelvis Hoist

I first got really interested in this position after watching the scene in the immortal classic Showgirls where Elizabeth Berkley straddles Kyle MacLachlan in the pool:

make a girl orgasm

I saw that and said, "Let ME try that"... but then I realized I didn't have a pool handy.

So, I improvised; I couldn't make a girl float without water, but I could do my best to hold her up.

make a girl orgasmThe next time I was having sex, I raised up on my knees out of adapted missionary, grasped my girls buttocks, and hoisted her pelvis up into the air. Then, holding her pelvis up with one of my hands beneath each of her glutes, I started thrusting hard, and she was cumming in minutes.

This has since become one of my favorite positions for blowing girls minds but, unlike adapted missionary, this one is HARD and WILL tire you out. Don't expect to do it for long unless you're in fantastic shape (on the plus side, it's certainly good exercise).

You'll see guys talking about shagging girls with pillows under their butts; this position is that, on steroids, with a can of Red Bull to boot.

Tips for maximizing the experience:

  • If you need to up your own excitement, watch yourself thrusting into and out of her. It's a lot more visually stimulating when you see your penis in her vagina

  • If you don't mind the strain of holding her lower body up with one hand for a moment, you can use your other hand to slap her clitoris or rub it... both very enjoyable for her

  • If you start getting winded but want to continue in this position, ask her to support her lower body with her toes, or have her prop her butt up with her hands beneath it and elbows on the bed

This position's a lot of fun, and women tend to find it pretty exciting, but it's so much work for you that you shouldn't expect to get a great deal of personal satisfaction out of it yourself.

However, if you really want to show a girl you know what you're doing in bed and can give it to her in very novel and pleasurable ways, this one does the trick.


More Sex Tips to Make a Girl Orgasm Loads

Here, more general sex tips that will make generating quick, powerful multiple orgasms in women much more of a snap than it was before you started using them:

  • Syncing up sensation. One of the secrets of sex I realized sometime back was that when you do what feels physically best for your penis during sex, it tends to get the most physically pleasurable reaction out of your partner. Thrust one way, and she'll like it; thrust another way that feels better for you, and she'll love it. Focus on maximizing your own sensation, and you maximize hers, too.

  • Dirty talk on the high points. I'm not much of a talker during sex usually (although I did mention one use for this when a girl's been giving you trouble in the "Am I still...?" thread on the discussion boards), but one time I do enjoy using it is in amplifying a girl's pleasure and helping her achieve orgasm more quickly on the high points. Just as she seems to be peaking, enjoyment-wise, you can ping her with a, "Your pussy feels so good," or, "You love my hard cock inside of you," as you thrust into her (said in a very sexy voice, of course) and watch/listen to her peak higher.

  • Teasing around her anus. The anus is a very sensitive part of the body, and you can increase a girl's excitement levels (and proximity to orgasm) by playing around near and in it. When you're having sex with a girl from behind (doggy style), you can run your hand along her inner buttocks, just near her anus... and if you really want to drive her hard, use your thumb to start dipping into and out of her anus, and stick it in and play around a bit. The combination of your thumb in her anus and your penis thrusting into and out of her vagina will drive her wild.

  • Sex from behind / doggy style. Sex from behind can be a very solid option for getting orgasms, but you need the right angle for this - if she's around your height, that's perfect; if she's much shorter than you, you'll have a harder time with this one. Use beds / sofas to try and get the proper angle. Some women orgasm easily from this position, while others do not. Doggy style causes the vagina to tighten, which is good, but can also lead to chafing if you stay in the position for more than 5 to 10 minutes and are having hard, rough sex without lubrication - so have a bottle of lubricant or petroleum jelly handy just in case.

  • Rough sex - hair pulling, biting. A surprising number of women really enjoy rough sex - things like biting them (lightly), or grabbing a fistful of their hair (easiest when having sex from behind) and yanking it backwards, hard. Some of the roughest enjoyable sex can be choking, because cutting off the oxygen flow to the brain heightens the sensation of climaxing, but I personally won't touch this one myself, even though I've had a few girls request it, because a few people die from this every year in freak accidents - there are enough other ways to heighten her enjoyment that you probably don't need to risk giving her an aneurism. Hair pulling and biting are great though, as are slapping her buttocks or breasts during sex.

  • Using foreplay to heighten anticipation / enjoyment. I'm a "let's get to it" kind of guy who doesn't enjoy foreplay a whole lot, so I use this only sporadically, but you can really get a girl lusting for you with good foreplay. Some of the most powerful orgasms I've generated in women have come after extended period of foreplay - e.g., riding around in the back of a taxi making out and teasing her sexually, etc., before we finally were able to get alone and get to it. The more you build her anticipation of the act, the more explosive it is for her when you finally slip inside and go to work on her.

  • Switching up sensations. When I discussed the sex fundamentals above, I mentioned that one of these sex fundamentals is that you maximize skin-to-skin contact - the more of your body touching hers, the higher the enjoyment. One thing you can do for variety during the act - that heightens pleasure by way of contrast - is going from a very high contact position to a minimal contact position; for instance, switching from adapted missionary over to sex from behind, and then taking your hands off her completely so that the only part of your body she's touching at all is your penis in her vagina (and your hips against her buttocks when you thrust forward into her). The difference in sensation is huge, and spikes her pleasure... and once she's acclimated to that position, you can turn her on her back again and go back to adapted missionary, and again the shock of suddenly maximal skin-to-skin contact sends waves of delight through her body, too.

  • Taking her to the point of orgasm - but not taking her over. I was a "break taker" by necessity while getting good at sex, to stop myself from cumming too quickly or to take a break if I started feeling a little tired. Just stop thrusting and relax, penis still inside her. What I noticed, however, was that if I routinely got a girl just to the point of climaxing, then had to stop because I was about to finish before she was, then started up again once I'd calmed down a bit... then had to stop again, just shy of her orgasming... then finally brought her to orgasm after all of this build up, the orgasms she'd experience were tremendously powerful - akin to what you'd get with some pretty good foreplay. This bringing her to the point of orgasming, then not letting her orgasm, then bringing her to the point of orgasming again, then not letting her orgasm, then finally bringing her there really makes the effect much more potent.

  • Sex in public. You can have even mediocre sex, but if you have it in public, it can be very exciting and pleasurable for many women, because of the uncertainty, excitement, and anticipation of not knowing if they'll be caught, if they'll get in trouble, and who, if anyone, will see. Check out the article on sex logistics for more on where and how to make this happen.

You can use some of these, or a bunch of these (or maybe ALL of these, if you're feeling frisky and ambitious) in concert together, or you can use them one at a time. That's up to your discretion.

However, each of these tactics will up her enjoyment - and her perceptions of you as a talented, amazing, top-caliber lover.


How Important is Good Sex?

make a girl orgasmGreat sex is the key to your romantic relationships. If the key to a man's heart is through his stomach, the key to a woman's is through her vagina.

Every girl I've given strong, hard multiple orgasms to in any kind of relationship capacity has fallen very quickly in love with me, even women who'd never been in love with anyone before and were otherwise very rational, unemotional people. It's almost to the point where it's become ridiculous - a girl seems like a total independent hard case, but a few rounds of screaming orgasms later and she's looking at you with doe eyes and little hearts swimming around above her head.

Great sex turns lionesses into kittens, just like what we talked about when we talked about horny girls.

In fact, it can get to the point where you start NOT wanting to be too good in bed... so women don't get too addicted (and then hurt). When I was still drunk off the amazing power of adapted missionary and telling my guy friends to try it out on girls, one of my more experienced friends at the time told me he didn't need it... because he didn't want the sex to be TOO good... just good enough to keep women coming back.

He didn't want them getting addicted, falling crazy in love, and becoming drama-causers.

So, use the ability to make a girl orgasm with caution, and use it responsibly. One-night stands are fine - give them the night of their lives. And long-term relationships are good - they'll never be with anyone as amazing as you.

But, I'd suggest you refrain from blowing the minds of your casual relationship partners... unless you want to turn a cool-headed sometimes-lover into a jealously possessive head-over-heels in love kind of gal.

Great power? Great responsibility.

Use it well...

Yours,
Chase Amante

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Comments

MisterX's picture

The rhythm I couldn't


The rhythm I couldn't understand how it could be a problem for anyone.
But I've been into music for 13-14 years - I started singing and playing an instrument when I was 7.

So my advice for the non-rhythm guys are:

-Start playing and instrument or singing.

-Take dancing classes.

Chase Amante's picture

Rhythm

Author

MisterX-

This seems to be why a large number of black and Latin men don't struggle with this, and have reputations as good lovers - because they tend to be around more singing and dancing from an earlier age than people from most light-skinned cultures are (Northern Europe, East Asia, etc.), they tend to have more intuitive, "natural" rhythm by default.

I'd imagine anyone who spends time on music over a period of years will see similar results.

Chase

Anonymous's picture

Clitoris stimulation and premature ejaculation


Chase, I would like to ask you two things based on your post:

1- During "adapted missionary" how exactly is clitoris stimulation achieved? Which part of the pelvis touches the clitoris? Do you refer to the part just above the penis (and bellow the belly)?

2- Premature ejaculation. I find myself suffering from this with every new sexual contact, and the only way through which it goes away is repetition of sex with the same girl. It feels like a familiarization issue to me. I reach this point by the third time I have sex with the same girl, and when I do, she is left with the best impressions, saying things like "I knew sex was going to be like that with you!". Any ideas how I can get over it completely?

Thanks

Chase Amante's picture

Pelvic Contact, Premature Ejaculation

Author

Anon-

Yes, that's right - you're stimulating her clitoris with the area of your pelvis just above the base of the penis while in adapted missionary.

As for premature ejaculation, I haven't had to deal with this one much myself, but I can tell you that my friends who have have tried different things like getting extra-thick condoms to minimize sensation, and trying to keep themselves distracted mentally during intercourse.

I went through a period of several months once where I suddenly found myself on the verge of finishing very soon into sex maybe half the time I had sex, and I had to repeatedly pause during it so as not to cum too quickly. Pausing and waiting for the excitement to pass before you resume is a good band-aid for the problem, and girls tend not to mind. When this was happening to me though, I realized I was mentally thinking about ejaculation and finishing during sex, so was able to fix it by steering my thoughts off of it.

My recommendation would be to pay attention to your thoughts the next time you're having sex with a new girl - are you thinking about orgasm (either thinking about how good it would feel, or thinking that you don't want it to happen too soon... and then thinking about how good it feels by accident)? If so, that's what's causing it - and you need to train yourself to stop thinking that way (an easy one when you're starting is to think about an exciting sports game you remember your favorite team playing - this can be distracting enough that your mind goes there instead of to picturing orgasm).

Eventually your brain gets conditioned enough that it stops thinking about orgasm all that much, and you don't have to distract yourself anymore and can just be in the moment and enjoy without having to worry about cumming too quickly.

Chase

Dave's picture

Premature ejaculation


In response to your question 2

I'm 45yrs old, and married. I have a very high sex drive. I had the same problem nothing seemed to work well as far as the premature thing. I finally went to see a Urologist.. He put me on a very very low does of zoloft. The generic is Sertraline I believe. Once I get about a 1 weeks dose in me, 1 tiny 50mg pill, I actually cut them in half and take 1/2 a pill every two or three days... Ive also gotten to the point where I can go off it for a week while the wife is having her period and then take a full pill and be right back to where I was.. Total life saver. Wife says I don't really need it but I feel more in control. Who wants to think about something else to get your mind off sex when your having sex so you dont cum to quick?? Learn to relax, learn to breath blah blah blah.. Hello its 2013 calling, we have a solution!
Now this solution might not be for everybody, depending on your age, your medical conditions etc but it has worked wonders for me.
There has been occasion when I first started taking it that I took the prescribed amount of 1 pill a day, and I was unable to ejaculate at all. I would much rather have that problem! ( Not a bad thing if your lady really likes to have the %^ %^&*#$ out of her.) Just learn to lower the dose to what your body needs. In my case it was very little. 30 pills of the generic with prescription costs me 10 dollars for 30 pills. They last me at least 3 months.

As far as the side effects.. decreased sensitivity is a good thing and controllable!! I notice I am more calm about things, and more focused for what little bit I do take..

Good Luck!

Knight's picture

Direction


Love the article Chase, know this was a big one for you.
I'm completely inexperienced in sex and am wondering if it's okay to get woman to show me things they like when I finally get to the close. Should I just out right tell them I'm inexperienced or should I just let my actions nervous actions speak for themselves? Obviously this is all going to lower attraction but I realize one of my biggest reasons for never closing fully is from a fear of not knowing the process. The adapted missionary position will be the technique I deploy first. I like being really good at something if I do it - if you understand.

Knight

Chase Amante's picture

Re: Direction

Author

Knight-

Yes, I think being good at something as quickly as possible is a common desire for men - guys get attraction points for skill, and lose them for lack of it. It's why men never want to ask for directions, too.

On asking for feedback and pointers: this can be a great way to learn, just make sure that you DON'T do it with a girl you want to have any kind of remotely serious relationship with. I'd also recommend not doing it until you've already had sex with a girl - you can ask her for pointers after, and before a second round, say, but don't do it before the first... the risk she gets turned off and decides she doesn't want sex is too great (and then you've lost another chance to learn and improve).

So, save it for girls you won't date, and save it until after your first go in the sack, and you ought to be fine doing this, and maybe even get some good intel.

Chase

Zac's picture

*inside her*


I been recently looking up on sex techniques and stumble upon "2 Girls Teach Sex". I have actually read some reviews, and also Keni Styles, on Superman Stamina. Good enough they say.

I wanted to note that bringing her close to orgasm and then stop because you likely to finish. I was reading articles with various women and indeed, women love penetrative sex. but importantly, i found out the reason they love it. When you "inside" her, it makes her feel complete. The bond that is form at that moment, and when you rest inside her just before orgasm, and finally does it, it feels heaven on earth. The feeling as if "We are One".

Some women prefer penetrative sex and resting inside her compared to orgasm. I can tell you that.

Zac

Chase Amante's picture

Penetrative Sex

Author

Zac-

"2 Girls Teach Sex" sounded interesting to me too - they approached me about doing advertising on the site, and it was one of the few external products I thought had a cool enough look / feel to it that I might consider that. But I read some reviews and it seems like it's a little light on actual content, and best for beginners. So I'd keep that in mind if you're thinking about taking the plunge on that one.

On the experience of the sex itself vs. orgasm - depends on the strength of the orgasm! Most women who experience "orgasms" with men really only experience the small bursts of pleasure that come with the lightest orgasms... sometimes because the girl herself is inexperienced and hasn't learned to be comfortable enough to allow herself to orgasm, but usually just because the male doesn't know how to bring the girl to strong orgasms. When you've given a woman very powerful orgasms though, any talk of her like the sex itself more than the orgasm goes out the window, and she becomes an orgasm-aholic - you turn even mild-mannered women into crazy sex fiends pretty quickly that way.

Chase

RedPill Chick's picture

I want to experience this


I want to experience this type of orgasm.

I'm so jealous!

Anonymous's picture

You Never Disapoint!


Verrry helpful Chase!

-Thanks

thedesignertom's picture

Hairstyles


Hey Chase,

My school prom is at the end of this month, please can you do a hairstyle article as fast as possible please?

Thanks buddy

Chase Amante's picture

Re: Hairstyles

Author

Tom-

Unfortunately, my usual computer is in the shop right now, which rather limits how creative I can get with images in articles, and as soon as I get it back I need to hop on an airplane - I'm unlikely to have a hairstyles article up before month's end.

My best recommendation is to go on Yelp or a similar service and search for the best fashion hair stylist in town that employs male stylists, and schedule a cut with one of those male stylists. Men tend to be better at cutting men's hair than women for some reason.

When you get there, tell him he's free to do whatever he wants with your hair, but you're going to prom and you want to look like a movie star.

You'll probably pay about $50, but you'll end up looking like a million.

Chase

Humay's picture

Nice


But i'm slightly confused about the necessity of orgasm during seduction and relationships. I wrote a post on the forum. I hope you can check it out when you can :)

Chase Amante's picture

Orgasms and Love

Author

Humay-

Just replied - here's my response.

Chase

Nick's picture

Hey Chase, Awesome article,


Hey Chase,
Awesome article, gonna have fun with this on the weekend. Owe you so much Chase, placing that subscription on the site has been worth it!

Also, I have been meeting girls who beg me for anal sex, any good techniques,positions for anal sex to give her her best night ever?
Another question, I have been wanting to perform annalingus but have reservations. Mainly, I am wondering if I could get an std from doing that. And if so, are there any preventive measures I could take first?

Thanks,
Chase

Chase Amante's picture

Backdoor

Author

Nick-

The anus is a mucous membrane just like the vagina, and as such is susceptible to all the same skin-transmitted diseases the vagina is, including genital warps and genital herpes. These can be transmitted to your mouth via skin-to-skin contact with them as well, so if you're going to try that there is some risk.

As far as anal orgasms, once you have her sufficiently warmed up (and you're already having sex with her and it's good and she's very aroused), have her lie on her side and enter her anus from behind (i.e., in the spoon position). Have her lift her leg (the one she isn't lying on) up into the air. From this position, the penis gets deep into the anus, hitting the other side of the vagina's back wall. Just make sure to use enough lubrication that you don't hurt her, and give her some clitoral stimulation with one of your hands as well, to help her along in enjoying the position.

Chase

Anonymous's picture

Scarcity


Hey Chase,

Oddly enough, scarcity has been TANKING my seduction with girls. Whenever I play that card, they seem to back off and don't want to get intimate because I'm leaving. It lessens their desire to be around me, and many have brought out the friend card right then and there when I stated my uncertain future. Could this because they see me more as a boyfriend candidate? Or maybe it's just because I'm going after the 18-21 range when girls are looking for Mr. Perfect?

Matt

Chase Amante's picture

Re: Scarcity

Author

Anon-

Sounds like you're already high enough value without it.

When you make yourself TOO valuable for a girl, to the extent that it seems like you're out of her league, she auto-rejects to protect her ego.

Younger girls are especially vulnerable to this; it's easy to tease a young girl a little too much or act a little too aloof and have her go completely cold if she saw you as higher value than her, because she doesn't know how to handle this type of situation socially yet and it's too much for her.

At least in your case, it sounds like you may not need it - or, that you're better off toning it down and being much more subtle about it. Right now, it sounds like there's too much icing on the cake.

Chase

A(moan)ymous's picture

Another Adapted Missionary


Great tips Chase!
There's also another postion that I've tried which is just like the one stated above, except, the man's legs are farther apart from each other and on the outside of the woman's legs, and the woman's legs are closer together and in between the man's legs. This gives the added benefit of her feelng tighter and more friction on the opening of her vagina. The downside is that it is hard to use with women who are already naturally tight, and to start the position, you have to make her open her legs wider to slide the penis inside, then with it inside, shift the position of the legs. This makes it more "annoying" to implement, but I've seen some good results with it also...

Chase Amante's picture

Legs Together

Author

A(moan)-

Yeah, legs together can be fun. It's often hard to get the same kind of thrust power when she's on her back, and in my case at least I find it tires me out much more quickly, but when you have a girl lying on her stomach with her legs together this one can actually get some pretty deep penetration and be good fun. It's an easy one to do if she's wiped and just wants to rest and let you do your thing, too.

Chase

Anonymous 's picture

By white do you men American


By white do you men American or Europeans(Italian a and spaniards)to?

Chase Amante's picture

White

Author

Anon-

When mentioning white guy rhythm (or lack of rhythm), Mediterranean men naturally get a pass on this one ;)

Chase

Anonymous's picture

How to last longer in bed


You did it again chase, another great article! I was wondering-- sometimes I get overly excited and I cum too early (premature ejaculation). I started doing kegel just a few weeks ago and I had slow, steady improvement. I wondered if you can make an article on how to last long in bed. It would be great because being a good lover is important to be a master of the game. Teach us a few tricks chase!

Chase Amante's picture

Lasting Longer

Author

Anon-

I just replied to another commenter above with a few quick tips. That said, certainly - I'll add a "how to last longer in bed" type post to the article queue.

Chase

Anonymous's picture

Aww, man! I BLEW it!!


Chase,
Awesome article...as usual. This has never been a problem with me before, as I was always VERY successful in relationships. But I messed up big time with a girl last week. She was seeing me and another guy for about a month or so each. I didn't ask her to compare me to him, work hard to keep her impressed, blah, blah, the usual stuff. I was smooth enough to keep her around for six weeks. Got WAAAY too drunk, took her to bed....and was completely worthless! I know, I know...how stupid is this?! After she came to my place and cooked for me and everything, too....ugh. I really liked her, too. But now I find myself having to give her all this space and ignore her because she has gone into auto-rejection.
To make this slightly worse, (as if it were possible), she has now chosen the 'other guy'. I've read every post on here as I am a member using an alias email. If there is any way of possibly turning this around...even just a few pointers...let me know. I know an oz. of prevention is worth a lb of blah blah blah......but I seriously want the challenge! I'm learning a lot with this insanely stupid situation I've put myself in. I'm going to her work to drop of some things she left here, so the meetup will happen naturally. She hasn't told me about him...and I know well her POSSIBLE agenda with that tidbit :) But I'm quickly moving up from intermediate to advanced....and man!...If I could pull THIS off...
Sincerely,
"David"

Chase Amante's picture

Bad Drunk Sex

Author

"David,"

It's hard to tell the right way to go with your situation - if she held you in VERY high esteem, and is bitter about things not working out right, your best bet is probably dropping the stuff off and saying, "Hey, look, I'm sorry about getting drunk and ruining a really special night... you deserve better than that. I'm glad you've got a good guy now," and then leaving. She'll almost certainly chase you down.

On the other hand, if she was on the fence with you before and it was neck-and-neck between this other guy, you may need to get preselection going on to regenerate her interest. You can use social media for this, or even grab a hot female friend and have her sit in the passenger seat of your car, and have this girl come down to grab her stuff from you (so she sees the girl in your car). When she asks who it is, tell her, "Oh, that's just my friend." Then go radio silent for a few weeks to a month or two (unless she chases you first), then get back in touch.

The path you go depends on whether she's rejected you because she feels like you care so little about her that you get sloppy drunk and give her awful sex, or because she just thinks the other guy is better than you. Use the wrong one of these here though, and it'll backfire horribly (the first one makes you look too weak if she already thought you were unattractive; the second one makes you look too playerish if she already thought you didn't care about her).

See if you can figure out which of those two it is - and plan accordingly. If you choose correctly, you still aren't guaranteed a turnaround... but you might just be able to pull it off.

Chase

"David"'s picture

Hahaha!


Yeah, you were right....as usual. She liked the shizza out of me, and I sent her an email explaining how bad I laughingly felt about it. As if it weren't the end of the world so as to not make a huge deal of it. Didn't actually apologize, but made it clear that it would have gone differently if alcohol hadn't been involved. Then disappeared. She called. I'm good.
You guys are awesome,
. David

Anonymous's picture

Rhythm versus tempo


Hey Chase, good write-up, I'm just confused about one thing, when you say to mantain a good rhythm. I'm a musician so maybe the terminology you used just confused me, but by keeping a rhythm do you also mean to keep the tempo from start to finish? I've always started somewhat slowly and got faster while approaching orgasm, is it better to mantain the same tempo throughout and just thrust harder while approaching climax?

Thanks!

Chase Amante's picture

Re: Rhythm versus tempo

Author

Anon-

Yes, sorry, forgive the mix up of music terminology there. You'd never know I took piano for five years and made my own music for four.

Tempo is indeed what you want to maintain, and you absolutely can (and should) thrust harder as you bring her closer to climax, while maintaining the same tempo.

Chase

Anonymous's picture

Size


Amazing article indeed. Really golden advice. But now that you have stressed so much on the importance of penetration that brings us to the million dollar question. How important is penis size? If you have less than average penis size will you still be able to give the orgasms you mentioned or is it just a mental barrier to be overcome.

Chase Amante's picture

Re: Size

Author

Anon-

The biggest factor size-wise is girth; a thicker penis feels more satisfying in a woman's vagina than a thinner one, though there's still plenty of pleasure you can give her with a thin penis.

Probably most important of all is the impact on the man's own confidence levels and self-esteem; penis size is strongly correlated with the number of partners a man will have lifetime... the larger his member, on average, the larger his partner count. Obviously, penis size itself isn't getting him laid - women have no idea what he's packing until it's already time for sex anyway. It's in his head (or perhaps there's a base level testosterone difference between men with larger and smaller penises, that also impacts sex drive; I'd suspect this might be the case from things I've seen and heard anecdotally, but haven't seen any hard evidence for or against it).

Length matters somewhat, but only if you're under 4 in (10 cm) - the average woman's vagina is only 3.5 inches deep relaxed, although it lengthens when fully aroused. In fact, if you have above average length, this can be a little problematic with hitting the back wall of the vagina too hard, causing her pain (or yourself, sometimes), especially if she's shorter or has a smaller vagina. If you're shorter, I recommend the shoulders-over-legs position, or entering her from behind with her laying flat on her stomach - both of these positions allow you to go much deeper than you're able to with, say, missionary position.

We talked a bit more about penis size on a discussion thread on the forums too, if you want more info: Does size matter?

Chase

Anonymous's picture

This is topical for me. I


This is topical for me. I have never had problems getting girls off multiple times but im with this girl who may be "the one" and i want to rock her world.

She is short and asian and i am quite large downstairs. Not the biggest in girth but not thin, quite long but not freakshow long. She loves it, says nobody has been that deep before but i have to be careful as sometimes she ouches.

Problem is shes a real tough case to get to orgasm. I did it once with a combination of tongue, finger and her fingers but it took forever. Even going down on her (and im good at it, know where the g spot is, and make most girls explode within a few minutes) i can grind away at it for.15-20 minutes and get her close but not over the edge.

From what i can tell she is the type that when she gets off she gets off super hard, in multiples of 10-15 even without further stimulation, she can just lie there and boom, boom, boom in waves.

Shes not at all reserved in bed, her sex skills would make jenna jameson blush, formerly married had two kids and a party girl long before that.

I never read about adapted missionary before but turns out ive already been doing it all along, i grab her by the neck and pull in, do the passionate kissing and eyes thing no wonder ive never had problems in the orgasm department before. This girl actually blurted out "you f**k me like you love me" and was a bit embarassed about it afterwards because were not exclusive yet and she couldnt beleive she said that.

Im going to keep trying to get her off without all this work maybe its just familiarity. Only problem is she is so damn hot, a korean who hits the tan salon that i would rate a 24 on a scale of 1-10. Normally with breaks and switching positions lasting 2-3 hours on the first round isnt a problem for me but i struggle to last 45 minutes with this girl... And with her being insanely hard to get off i read your article for new tricks.

She already has a vibe and finds that even that thing cant get her off a lot of the time. She finds this extremely frustrating. I want to rock her world. Any tips for me with this difficult speciemin? Maybe distracting her from thinking about it? Forget lasting just pound her like im just taking what i want?

This girl is the soft/experienced type and i am the hard/experienced type. There are qualities in her that i beleive will make her an excellent partner with less drama than previous partners and she has her act together and is feircely independent and i usually end up with damsels in distress.

I want to blow her mind get her to want to go exclusive and be done with dating. Ive got 3 girls on the go including this one and tbh my member is getting tired out. Alternating between girls and even doing two in a day for 7 days straight has been fun but im ready to lock in again. Shes a bit jaded and guarded after a messy divorce 3 years agoso shes going to be a tougher nut to crack but well worth the effort.

Thanks

Anonymous's picture

don't die


Bruv, with you unleashing somethings that you had kept secret from the world for us subscribers is awesome.! I Hope you stay alive to reap the gains this ish will give you.lol. Most folks think people nearing death or retirement usually squeeze everything they have out first.

All the best Chase. This is excellent as always.

Chase Amante's picture

Re: don't die

Author

Glad you're enjoying, Anon. Spend every day at work as if you're about to retire, I find, and it's a much more satisfying work experience. Helps you be a lot more forthright about things, too.

Chase

The M's picture

Some questions


Hey Chase,

Haven't commented in a few months (busy making progress with girls in the real world, thanks to this site!), but have enjoyed reading your articles. Your choices of topics are as interesting and practical as your articles on them.

During those 8-10 minutes in adapted missionary, how much eye contact do you make with her, and where do you look when you're not making eye contact? Do you just stare off into space or close your eyes? I just don't want it get awkward or anything.

How often do you kiss her? If it's the first time or casual, would long, passionate kisses on the lips during sex be too much?

Do you sometimes stop, run your hands over her or give her oral or change the position for a minute, then go back? It seems that it could get a bit monotonous otherwise.

Do you really mean keeping the exact same tempo for all 10 minutes? How fast do you go? You don't need to give me BPM, lol, but a general ballpark would be nice.

Finally, you said that passion is key, and that you had to simulate it for a while at first. I don't think I've ever had any problems there, but would you mind breaking it down a bit (specific behaviors during sex and foreplay)?

Best,
The M

Chase Amante's picture

Eye Contact, Kissing, Tempo, and More During Sex

Author

M-

Longtime no hear! Great to know you're still alive and kicking, and busily implementing things out in the real world, man.

On eye contact, there's a passage in a Stephen King novel - I think it was The Stand, or it might have been The Regulators - in which one of King's characters recalls a former lover who used to stare into his eyes all throughout sex. The orgasms were never quite as powerful with her, but the experience was far more intimate, the character thought. I think this nicely sums up eye contact during sex - it creates a more powerful, profound long-term effect (the pleasure is more firmly anchored to images of you in her head, and her in yours), but it leads to a less mesmerizing experience in the moment - her attention is divided between physical and visual stimuli. Some eye contact is good, but usually not more than a few fleeting glances - except for those times you want to really imprint on each other. The rest of the time, you can keep your eyes closed, or look around - she won't really be able to see your eyes anyway.

Kissing - use your discretion. If you're feeling incredibly turned on and passionate, lots of passionate kissing will take the experience to another level. In missionary positions, you can bend down and kiss / suck on her breasts and other body parts above them - do this when you want to infuse a little extra passion into the process.

Stopping - stopping is fine if you need a breather, if you're getting too close to climax and need to calm yourself down, or if you want to change positions or do something different. I may run my hands up and down a girl when paused, but I very rarely perform oral sex; just a personal preference there. There are all kinds of things you can do on breaks - whatever feels good is usually best.

For tempo, throw on any ambient or house music, and slow it down by about 50% (i.e., every other kick of the metronome), and you've got a good solid sexual beat to hit. If you stop or change positions and can sense she's close to climaxing, you can start up again with a quicker tempo, so long as it won't tire you out before she cums.

On growing, maintaining, and stimulating passion - that's an article in and of itself (and I have it in the article cue - someone asked for a "how to be passionate" article some time back). So keep your eyes peeled - but, in the meantime, one of my favorites is attacking her with passion... things seem calm, and then you just throw passion at her. This is very exciting for women during escalation and sex, and climax frequently follows not far behind when you're using it during sex.

Chase

The M's picture

Tempo


Very cool - thanks! Just one clarification: isn't 50% of a house beat really slow? Like, thrusting about once a second? I felt that "raw sexual enthusiasm" went a lot faster... But I guess the point is that you want to start slower and more consistently, and then speed up, rather than starting too fast and getting tired.

Of course I'll just have to try it and see. ;)

M

Chase Amante's picture

Re: Tempo

Author

M-

About one thrust per second sounds right; 60 thrusts / minute. When you're going for 30 or 40 minutes or an hour, you've gotta be thinking "conserve my energy!" Especially when you start thrusting harder.

I've also found in my own personal experience that thrusting too fast is both a) desensitizing for you and the girl (the sensation decreases as it becomes a big blur of in and out, and the pleasure goes with it), and b) much harder to maintain a consistent rhythm - it's easy to get sloppy and break trance.

But if you can go faster without tiring yourself out or getting sloppy, and you and her are still able to get the same (or greater) degrees of pleasure out of it, I see no reason not to.

Chase

MichaelK's picture

After reading many articles...


Ive read many of your articles Chase in this first month ive subscribed and i will stay a member for a very long time to continue to read your articles over and over. As a virgin reading this article, i dont feel like a virgin anymore because now i know exactly what do during sex. This is like an instruction manual, i can honestly say this has dramatically boosted my overall "vibe" or "x-factor". I was concerned about me doing everything right with the girl then after having sex i would look like a idiot to the girl, but again this instruction manual has solved that barrier for me(im sure others as well). I know it must have been tough giving secret Chase but thank you very much, i look up to you now as the master. Also you were thinking about taking this to public, as a member if i have any say in that i feel you should keep it here only, i feel like if you put it in public then when everyone knows it will be meaningless since it will be so commen(maybe even more public drama), but i personally feel this is great secret should be kept hidden(that way only guys who actually search online long enough find your site and your secrets). All your articles(and Ricardo's) are fantastic works of art, but i have one request which is how to avoid STDs or maybe because im still a virgin i may be taking this to seriously. Either way if you can shed some light on this request i would greatly appreciate it. Once again Thank you Chase!

Michael K

MichaelK

Chase Amante's picture

STDs

Author

Michael-

Appreciate your subscription, and I'm real glad to hear this one's given you some swagger and let you feel a little more confident prior to your first time.

Ricardus discussed staying safe in this article previously: "Dodging the Dangers of Sex (and Dating)," and I talked about STDs specifically in a forum post in this thread: "The Dangers of Sex - Virgins."

I'll likely still do a comprehensive post specifically on STDs on this at some point - I'll add it to the post queue.

Chase

Luke j.'s picture

Multiple Orgasms and Domination


Sup Chase,

Its been a couple of months since I lasted commented on this site(or the blog), but regarding giving a girl multiple orgasms and domination I kind of got a little confused.

When trying to achieve giving a girl multiple orgasms do you continue to hit her with the same intensity (fairly hard) or do you soften it up and climb the hill to orgasm again. Also, should you slow it down after orgasm? switch positions and try again maybe? or is it more like a string of orgasms, getting her off just to find herself cumming again?

On domination, should you go all out domination and lead her the entire way during sex? i.e. sex position, intensity, kissing, eye contact, etc. It kind of makes me feel a little self centered if I a girl suggest more kissing, speed, position, etc but I end up forgetting a couple minutes later in the heat of the moment, can't last in those conditions, or don't like it. Should you let the girl take charge sometimes? i.e. riding you, kissing you, telling you what to do?

Thanks for all your help,
Luke

Chase Amante's picture

Re: Multiple Orgasms and Domination

Author

Luke-

On multiple orgasms, unless the orgasm happens too quickly, you can generally continue to thrust with the same tempo and intensity and give her more orgasms right in a row; to get more than 3 or 4 you'll usually need to switch some things up, including intensity, tempo, dirty talk, pull out and throw her in a different position and then get immediately back to it where you left off, etc. You can slow down and "climb the hill again" and I do know some men who do this, but that's both too much work for me and too unexciting... it's a lot more fun when she's cumming again and again all at once, and (in my opinion) a lot easier to do. You just don't want her cumming too quickly or too lightly - so long as it's a powerful orgasm, and she's built up to it for 8 to 10 minutes, you can do this fairly reliably with girls.

It's fine to let girls take charge sometimes, sure. Sometimes you may want to dominate her from the outset; other times, you can be relaxed and let her do what she'd like, and then attack her with dominance later. Some of the hardest orgasms I get from girls is from letting them be on top (woman on top), and then once they've had enough I'll sit up, put my arms and hands behind their backs, and then roll them (carefully; very easy to break your penis when she's on top with sudden movement) onto their backs, with my arms still tightly wrapped around them, and then start thrusting hard in adapted missionary. This one has a nice beginning of female control at the beginning, followed by you dominating her and pinning her down hard at the end.

Chase

Hum's picture

Is this position the same as


Is this position the same as the coital alignment technique ?
http://www.xvideos.com/video1645144/coital_alignment_technique_cat_

If not how is it different? Apart from being on elbows.

Franco's picture

Mantrap


Hum,

I actually had this discussion with my good buddy because he also thought it was CAT. But there is a name for this position -- it is called the "mantrap."

It's really not a common sexual position to talk about, which is unfortunate, because with the technique that Chase mentions above, it can be absolutely orgasmic for the woman.

Here's a link to it:

The Man Trap

Chase Amante's picture

Coital Alignment Technique

Author

Hum-

It looks quite similar to that, yes. Wikipedia's description of the coital alignment technique sounds very similar to this:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coital_alignment_technique

... apparently CAT was first discussed in 1988.

The main difference between the first segment of your video and what I'm calling adapted missionary is being on the elbows; this makes it much easier to maintain a steady thrust tempo and get deeper penetration without tiring yourself out prematurely.

The main difference between the "mantrap" position Franco shared and adapted missionary is that the woman does not wrap her legs around yours (apparently women can also do this sometimes in CAT; this doesn't work for adapted missionary, as a good portion of your thrust power is still coming from your legs - her legs wrapped around yours limits this and reduces the power of your thrusting).

Chase

OD's picture

What do you do when she is too sensitive to orgasm?


Hey Chase,

Great article. I always learn a great deal from your posts.

I am currently in a relationship with girl who is quite caring to me, and she also happens to be fairly passionate in bed. When I first started seeing her, she was a virgin, had never had a boyfriend, had only kissed one guy in her life, and never had a non-clitoral orgasm (which she obviously brought herself to). Since I have been with her we have had a pretty good sex life...though it took a while, she eventually warmed up to the idea. On one of our first times having sex, we stumbled upon the altered missionary position you describe above. It happened accidentally...I wanted to try and stimulate her clitoris with my pelvis, went into that position, and I ended up giving her the first vaginal orgasm she ever had. I didn't make much of it until we had sex another time, when I focused intently on maintaining that position while keeping a steady rhythm. This time, she had four loud, intense orgasms consecutively over twenty minutes...I could tell how intense they were by how dirty and foul her language became over time, as gentle moaning became "OH SHIT" and "OH FUCK" and correspondingly her grip on my back became more and more intense and powerful. Ever since that day, this has become her favorite position in bed, is pretty much the only one that makes her come consistently and is also the only one she really cares about when having sex. Other positions (including legs-over-shoulders or doggy) are either not stimulating enough, or make her uncomfortable and unable to orgasm.

One thing I struggle with, though, is what to do when she gets too sensitive, or perhaps how to avoid this. In our sex life, I have never been able to make her come more than four times in a row. Frequently, she will come pretty hard and very quickly within 30 seconds of me entering her in the altered missionary, and then will be unable to have subsequent orgasms because of feeling too sore or sensitive. Sometimes with good rhythm and effort I can do one to three more orgasms, but by that time she gets very sore and feels pain or no feeling at all (despite lube). She is also much shorter than me, and because my penis is longer than average, I hit the back of her vagina in some positions, especially in legs-over-shoulders, which also makes her sore and uncomfortable.

It seems to me that when subsequent orgasms do happen, they usually take much longer to achieve every time (though also seem more powerful than the first). She seems to like gentle, rhythmic sex (small motions while I am deep inside) rather than a hard pounding, and she only achieves orgasms from the former style but over time still becomes sore and sensitive. Breaks between sessions do help, but it also seems that the soreness persists for over a day before she can have sex at the same capacity as when we start. I also try to focus on other parts of her body during sex, such as neck, ear lobes, nipples and general physical contact and sensuality.

My question to you is...what are some things I can do, or some modifications we can try, to reduce her degree of soreness and allow her to have more than four orgasms when we have sex? When she is having problems having orgasms after the first time, are there different rhythms or approaches I should use? Have you encountered this with some of your women, and how have you resolved it?

Though I am her first lover, I want to be the best lover she might ever have.

Chase Amante's picture

Breaking Her In When's She's Too Sensitive

Author

OD-

Her soreness / sensitivity will decline with time as her body adapts to sex with you. Her orgasming very quickly upon your entry is all psychological - basically, she's so turned on / excited by you that she can't contain it... it's a female version of premature ejaculation. The good/bad news is that will fade with time (good because you'll have an easier time giving her more and stronger orgasms... bad because she won't be so insanely excited about sex with you as she was at the beginning!).

What you can do right now to both reduce her soreness and hopefully limit her cumming too quickly early on is to start out very slowly and lightly with soft strokes. Think of it as warming her up to sex first. If she seems like she's getting too close to orgasm, stop, stay inside her, and just sit there until she calms down a bit. When girls orgasm too quickly, this can make them extra sensitive too. Have it as your goal to try and delay her first orgasm until at least 5 to 10 minutes, and then once that seems like it's close, up your thrust power and speed and start going hard. That should enable you to follow on the first orgasm with a string of subsequent ones after it, assuming she's sufficiently warmed up. If she complains of pain though, she isn't warmed up enough (or she's already orgasmed, and never got warm enough first or is in the process of cooling back down).

Chase

Anonymous's picture

I don't understand how your


I don't understand how your adapted missionary is any different from regular missionary. How much does resting on your elbows actually change?

Chase Amante's picture

Differences

Author

Anon-

Please read the article, and keep your eyes peeled for this line of text and its accompanied bullets explaining:

"Here's how this differs from an ordinary missionary position."

Chase

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