How to Get a Girl in Bed: 10 Crucial Tips for Making Her Yours | Girls Chase

How to Get a Girl in Bed: 10 Crucial Tips for Making Her Yours

how to get a girl in bedI haven't touched much on last minute resistance on this site, and it's about the time I got a proper post up on it. Before we jump in, I want to share a note from a reader who wrote in asking about how to get a girl in bed to illustrate what I'll be talking about and provide us an example case to work from:

Hi Chase, Firstly I'd like to say that I love your blog and that many things have started to make sense (especially about moving fast). After taking your advice I decided to try it out and act as though the only night I had a chance of sleeping with a girl was that night.

It started with me being introduced to a girl through a friend at a party, we flirted a bit and I intentionally moved her around. When we got to town everyone got separated and we were together, after moving her around more I persuaded her to take me back to hers for a "sandwich".

We got back to hers she made me a sandwich and after that it started getting a bit steamy in the bedroom. However when I went to take her panties off she wouldn't let me, even after trying about 5 times. She then claimed that she was too tired and we should try in the morning. When the morning came she avoided sex again and I managed to find out that she though sex was pointless if we weren't in a relationship.

To say the least I was confused and angry but also felt a sense of failure as though I wasn't good enough to be her lover. I mean why would a girl take me to hers, heavily make out with me and then refuse to have sex even if she wanted a boyfriend? I wanted to be put in the lover zone not the boyfriend zone.

A reply to this would be much appreciated but a blog post on why a girl would do this would be awesome.

Our reader's case here is a classic case of last minute resistance, or LMR -- that thing that happens when it feels for all the world like you're just about to sleep with a girl, that it's totally inevitable, that all that either of the two of you want in all of existence is to just be together... and then she suddenly, inexplicably, unexpectedly throws a wall up and won't let you proceed. Why's that happen, and what can you do about it?

To show you how to get a girl in bed and overcome last minute resistance, first we're going to have to get you to understand why women react this way -- and then we're going to have to teach you what you can do about it.

Chase AmanteAbout the Author: Chase Amante

Chase woke up one day in 2004 tired of being alone. So, he set to work and read every book he could find, studied every teacher he could meet, and talked to every girl he could talk to to figure out dating. After four years, scads of lays, and many great girlfriends (plus plenty of failures along the way), he launched this website. He will teach you everything he knows about girls in one single program in his Mastery Package.

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Comments

M's picture

Thanks for that.
I just hate LMR. It always makes me nervous, and if even everything goes fine later, I still can be too nervous for sex after it and can have problems relaxing.

jimmy's picture

Hey Chase, thanks for the tips! I will be making girls take their shoes off from now on;) I do have a question thou. Is it possible that some girls just will not go all the way unless they are in a relationship, or some girls have made a strong decision to stay a virgin until marriage? It would be interesting for readers to know if you still get the occassional girl who will only makeout in bed, or give you a handjob etc. I'm curious what it's like for a guy like you who is very good with women. Thanks again!

Anonymous's picture

I'm a girl, and that's definitely the case for some of us.

tina's picture

Another girl here, of the sex-only-within-a-relationship mind. I was really nervous/inexperienced the first time I went back to my current boyfriend's place, and he respected my preferences--we only did other stuff before we became a couple a few months later.

Knowing my preferences, if he'd tried to go all the way, I would've decided he was a sleazebag and let him go right then.

If a girl is that conservative, she'll probably tell you before you get very far... and if you want no-strings-attached sex, you probably shouldn't bother taking her home in the first place... WAY too much trouble. If you pressure her and she gives in, she's probably going to regret it, and then she'll associate that feeling of shame with you and want nothing to do with you. Even if you manage to score with a girl like that, is it worth the emotional damage for her? Just a thought...

However, if you're after a relationship with such a girl and you get her to your apartment, I advise telling her upfront "I'm willing to wait till you're ready" so she feels safe and comfortable with you, and sticking to it. You have to dial it down when you're dealing with a conservative girl.

Jimbo's picture

Dude, don't listen to these chicks! WAITING MONTHS only to do "OTHER STUFF"?!! (presumably other than sex) "I'm willing to wait till you're ready"?!! Faggotry Level: Advanced.

The only reason to wait a month for sex is if she's 17 years, 11 months old. And even then you should fucking around until she hits majority.

Dude believe me, you start acting faggy like that and some other guy will come along who couldn't give an ass fart about how conservative the girl is and neither will the girl herself and she'll bone him quicker than you'll be able to say, "wait, wat?" and she'll respect him as man way more than she'll ever you.

So to answer your question: No, there's no such girl! There may be girls like that ideologically, intellectually, like neocortex stuff; but instinctively, they're pretty much all craving the man in you to come out and lead them and dominate them to passionate sex.

If she pulls crap like that on you, it's because you failed at #3, 5 or 8.

Please reread the last subhead of this article carefully.

Tennisboy13's picture

Let me start off by saying that your page is great and you make a lot of good points; however, I don't agree with you entirely. You're comparing buying a car to sleeping with a man. One is permanent, one is not. I don't think a woman needs to judge that a man has all of the characteristics of her mr. Right to sleep with him. The original guy asking the question wasn't asking how to convince a woman to marry him, he was asking how to get a woman to have a one night stand. I realize that this may be easier said than done, considering the "flakiness" of women, but that's why he asked you. No disrespect intended, and I say this with no ill-will, but you didn't really answer the question asked. At least not well, or fully.

Anonymous's picture

You have to realize that this is potentially long run for women, though. There are all kinds of things that could happen because of it-pregnancy, STDs, etc.- that will completely change her life and there is no sure-fire way to make sure that those things can't happen. Granted, there are some girls who will just be looking for a one night stand, but that requires ignoring the possibility of all of the things listed above. Sometimes those things can impact at the last moment. And sometimes there are legitimate fears because of upbringing, or just realizing that she's about to have sex with a stranger. If you can kind a girl who is willing to just go at it with a stranger, kudos. But it seems to me that intimacy is more about the stuff that comes before and after actual intercourse than the the actual sex itself-and that's what's most women want.

Jimbo's picture

These types of fears (about pregnancy, STDs, not getting him to stick around, etc.) are more instinctive than they are rational. Women don't think about them consciously, but the reluctance they tend to have before sex (or the regret sometimes after) is the result of a harsher past where a lot if not most of sex led to procreation, and the father not sticking around meant a lot less chances of the baby to survive.

Anonymous's picture

Man this is great i have heard about the push pull and i never understood it well either David deangelo knows what he is talking about but you break down in a way that's understandable i really appreciate this its not so frustrating to understand but makes perfect sense. Thank you!!

Anonymous's picture

This is one of the better articles I have seen (with actually things you can do and try) so many are just crap...keep the info coming man

Anonymouse's picture

Due to upbringing, I am terrified of sex. Remember those health videos that showed a bunch of kids dieing from aids, becoming pregnant, and many more horrible consequences? Yeah I do, and it causes me to shake... Educational videos? More like terrifying the shyt outta me.

Anonymous's picture

a few days happened to me this thing called LMR I HATE IT!

Anonymous's picture

small point about your analogy - the driver is riding with the handbrake on - any idiot knows not to do that!

Anonymous's picture

mabye the buyer hesitated and wanted more knowledge before driving the car

Tobi's picture

Hi Chase, I must commend you on a good job you are doing.Dude, help! I am pretty fast in approaching girls, getting their numbers and even bringing them home.But, when I start touching them whether outside the room or in my bed.They complain that I touch a lot! And that they don't like it.I mean many girls and I haven't be able to bed them.

Anonymous's picture

Chase,

First off, love your site, and love how you frame mindsets -- using game to give what women would want already, without deceiving them or treating them like objects.

Two things I wanted to ask, and hopefully you'll see it even though this post is two years old.

First I ran into a little bit of trouble last night trying to take a girl to bed. We met at a bar at a hotel, and though not perfect, I did a few things right -- deeped dived into conversation, moved her -- and some not right (cocky at one point, kissed her before doing the deed, being indecisive about where to go) and I ended up convincing her that'd I'd be worth spending the night with from a more rational approach. Like I said, a lot of mistakes--and to be fair, I think my looks have let me get away with bad fundamentals.

Anyways, part of the challenge was that, even with the ok from one of her friends to take care of her for the night (a good sign!), one of her friends was sleeping back at their room. We woke her up, I ended up freezing and, long story short ended up walking away frustrated. It happens. What I want to know is my options for next time. Should I have just tried to move her to my car, even if she was giving me resistance (and tbh, she thought it was kind of creepy when I suggested going someplace else off site, understandable)? Should I have gotten a separate room? Or--and this sounds wild--should I have tried to convince the roommate to join in, or at least watch, I couldn't tell if she was tired or angry, but I feel like calling her on a shit test may have opened her up. What would have been the best thing to do?

Second, I live in a small resort are. I'm one of those cases where I always see people I work with or somebody I know when going out. And I'm concerned that the more practice I try to get, the more severe repercussions and blowback I'm going to get from trying to take girls to bed. What are your thoughts on someone in this situation? Would it be better to just move (some what difficult considering my career and skillset at the moment) or are there ways to be a "secret lover" in a small town without getting flack?

handsomerandyblackladdiebrad1953's picture

A lot of today's women won't care for this,but most realize we men want their body.
However,as a black Canadian dude,62,who's regarded poster boy handsome,I'm called 'Laddie" for the boyish good looks,but also my belief that your lady should receive such courtesies as opening doors,pulling out chairs,lifting objects,opening jars,and other chivalrous kindnesses. Thus,she'll likely be MUCH MORE AMENABLE to your-or my-partnering advances-slapping/rubbing her bottom,boyfriend-girlfriend love wrestling,perhaps my lifting her and throwing her over my shoulder,liberating her awesome assets from her bra-I call a buxom woman "Lady Blossom because her chest and hopefully libido are blossoming SEEMINGLY EVERYWHERE!!!-before we couple rodeo!!!!!!!

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