The 100 Hour Rule | Girls Chase

The 100 Hour Rule

100 hour ruleIt occurs to me that there is a certain percentage of the readership here that has been reading Girls Chase for a fairly long time but not taking much or any action.

Some guys work on their fundamentals enough to get more attraction, but have difficulty ever talking to new women.

Some guys view all this self-improvement hoopla as something of a curiosity to be read about, enjoyed, and perhaps considered, but not something to be done, at least not right now.

Some guys meet women in their social circles, but not really in the way that Peter discusses in his series on social circle; more in a just freeform, unguided, I'll-meet-women-whenever-they-meet-me kind of way, that doesn't lead to a whole bunch of outstanding results but does lend itself nicely to ending up fixated on one or two women you just can't seem to get.

For those readers - all the guys who'd like to start, someday maybe, or even right now but just can't seem to get past their approach anxiety no matter how much they read or how much they do, I'd like to suggest something that's been a boon to me in skill building of all types, classes, and varieties: something I call the 100 hour rule.

Chase AmanteAbout the Author: Chase Amante

Chase woke up one day in 2004 tired of being alone. So, he set to work and read every book he could find, studied every teacher he could meet, and talked to every girl he could talk to to figure out dating. After four years, scads of lays, and many great girlfriends (plus plenty of failures along the way), he launched this website. He will teach you everything he knows about girls in one single program in his Mastery Package.

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Comments

Anonymous's picture

Hello, I was wondering if you could write anything about intimidating behaviour? I mean in some articles you mention how guys come out too strong with something, or the way they come across is too strong and when they open their mouth, they release super strong power that blows women off and then leave. I am short guy, some women are bigger than me and I feel this power when some big tall guy is talking with me. So I partly understand the presence of this part. Yet I wonder what effect it has on women and since I have no data nor real experience with this topic, I would be glad to hear something about this.

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Anon-

Sure - I'll add it to the list.

Chase

Anonymous's picture

I have been reading Girls Chase for a while, and I have hit that wall where reading no longer helps me. But due my summer job and prepping for a huge test coming up soon, I put it aside for a bit. Now that I'm back in school, I want to get myself back into "back into shape".
To do this, I've been setting a goal for a day and when I go out each weekend, taking a couple goals with me. Over the past week, I realized that some goals were too big to accomplish in simply one day. I've been turning them into weekly and monthly goals. Can I use the 100 hour rule for these goals?
For example a goal would look like this: I want to spend 100 hours actively working on building intrigue in a conversation

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Anon-

It's a little bit harder that way, since it's not quite a cut-and-dry "go here and do this", but... I think you might be able to do that, sure.

The hard part is probably going to be what you consider an hour of intrigue - maybe an easier objective is "100 hours of talking to at least 20 new women focused on creating as much intrigue as possible." Then it's clearer what counts and what doesn't (e.g., walking around looking for someone to talk to doesn't count; sitting with your buddies and drinking doesn't count; sex with that cutie you met on the street last Tuesday doesn't count; only conversation where you're actively building intrigue counts).

I think the "new women" part is important - it's easy to generate some intrigue with a girl you've known for a long time and for comfortable messing around with, but a bit more challenging when you're starting out to be mysterious and mystifying in an attractive way with someone you've just met while still putting enough information out there for the conversation to flow naturally.

Chase

D'brainz's picture

Great Article once again Chase!!! Since I started reading your articles, my social life has since changed drastically.
Now I understand why I haven't been getting results, these article was what I just needed to keep going.

I also want to ask you a few questions. Though, I posted this on the forum , I haven't gotten any reply yet. first of all, I live in a hostel, it's mixed, I mean, both boys and girls of different nationalities. The hostel is a storey
building with five floors, with many cubicles and rooms on each floor. Have been going out of recent to meet girls, though,just starting out, I feel like I could also meet girls in the hostel.

The thing is, I've been getting interests from chicks in the hostel of recent but I don't know how to close things out. Do I just go to their rooms, knock and try to talk to them, or just hang around in the corridor, wait for them to come out, grab a number or whatever. The other day, I tried to go to a chick's room but ended up freaking myself out, thinking it's weird to go to someone's room uninvited. Any advice will be much appreciated, Thanks again!

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Brainz-

Hostels are a pretty chill environment, and since everyone is passing through and more or less in search of an adventure, you're usually pretty safe just stopping by and knocking on someone's door. A good bet might be grabbing a couple of beers before you head over, then when she opens the door just ask, "May I come in? I brought beers!"

From there, if you're getting the "it's on" vibe right away, just make a move and go for it. If not, tell her, "Let's throw the comforter over us and drink some beers and watch a movie," and get in bed and pull the blanket up over the two of her, then hop in and tell her to come on if she's still making up her mind. Once girls are in bed under the cover with you, it's ridiculously easy to escalate for some weird reason (they feel safer under the cover, or it feels naughtier, or something).

Chase

Wes's picture

Hey Chase,

I completely related to the Krav Maga thing. last week I got to have one free class of Krav and kickboxing. Goddang, that was the toughest thing I ever did.
The next day I was SO sore and was sore the whole weekend. I'm glad I'm not the only one who was completely weak and pathetic. I want to go back anyway and master both kickboxing and Krav.
Also the class is FULL of sexy women. The ratio of women to men was 3:1.
I absolutely love fit women and women who wear yoga pants and if I go back I'm going to see if I can pull any of them. Was your Krav class like this? Did you pull any of them?

Anyway, I decided to take a break from approaching and I'm going back to working on my fundamentals. It seems like every time I think I've got them down, they seem to disappear again. It really shows that they're not TRULY engrained in me. Maybe I'm rushing, but approximately how long does it take for fundamentals to sink in? Can they be thrown in the same category as skills. I don't believe so because they're solely who you are not what you can do.
So far, I've gone a week with a "devil may care" "fuck everything" attitude and I'm seeing results but I don't know if it'll last. I don't want to go back to my "please like me" "I'm a friendly, unthreatening guy" attitude that I used to have while kissing people's asses.

Great helpful article as usual
Good luck with Krav
Wes

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Wes-

Fortunately or unfortunately, my Krav classmates have mostly been big, stocky guys twice my size, or lithe muscular guys with boundless energy. Well, makes for fewer distractions, and harder training regimens... and you get toughened up a good bit more when you're taking all the kicks, punches, and throat grabs!

On fundamentals... depends on what it is, with some of them being quicker, some slower. Things like voice and keeping my back straight and chest out took me a very long time to get fully automatic... last time I made major changes to my voice, it took maybe 3 months to stick, plus another 3 months of completely eliminating slippage back to my old speaking style here and there; back erectness I'd fix, only to realize 6 months later it'd gotten mediocre again, then I'd fix; 6 months later, mediocre again; and it didn't get to the point where it was always good without me ever worrying about it at all until maybe 3 years on (although most of that time I wasn't consciously worrying about it). Now I autocorrect back posture any time I start slouching with only very little conscious awareness. There are other things I've incorporated, like Jack Sparrow fingers (the little hand / finger motions Johnny Depp does as Jack Sparrow in the Pirates movies... think he got them from Keith Richards originally... I don't use these that much, but they're fun, charismatic, and occasionally fitting for the occasion), that took me maybe a couple of weeks, tops, just because they were so much fun that I wanted to use them whenever appropriate, and didn't need much mental training to.

It might depend on just how much you enjoy doing the thing - when I started walking wide and dominant through crowds and making people part way in front of me, I really enjoyed it, and had people telling me I walked like a king; I didn't have to work on doing that consciously for long before it became a normal habit. So, purely based on what I can remember here, I'd say the more you enjoy doing something and WANT to do it, the faster you'll probably incorporate it; the more it's a pain to do, the longer it's going to take to implement simply because your brain is protesting against it, forgetting to do it because it doesn't want to do it, and trying to find excuses not to do it ("I'm tired; let's work on that later").

Chase

Wes's picture

Thanks Chase.

I guess I just don't enjoy doing it then. I mean, some things like the walk and moving slow feel unnatural and tekious.
I've spent years being conditioned to move fast in order to not miss classes at school.
That's cool that you naturally move slow though. The only time that is tedious is doing cardio, like you said. And we all have that one thing that we don't enjoy doing.

I guess I'm not going to be a "tool bearing hominid" anytime soon. Lol

Michel's picture

Hi Chase,

Thanks for all the great advice on this site. Here's one element of explanation why some guys read about dating, would like to be dating, but don't do it: like many people who go actively into self-improvement, I'm out of a long relationship that ended up a few months ago because I was naive and made mistakes. I know very well that it's over now, and that it's best not to even think about reviving a relationship once it's over, even though I improved a lot since it ended: I know that there are many other cool girls around (after all, each of my girlfriends was way better than the previous so far), so this is not a case of not being able to get over an ex.

But with my girlfriends before, I knew each and every time that we would be lovers in the first 10 seconds after meeting her. Then there is no question of approach anxiety or of bad technique (even though I'm sure that technique helps make the relationship better, and that all I read on this site will one day prove useful!). But without this feeling I really don't feel attracted to a girl. The idea of having sex with these random strangers I meet every day is even mildly disgusting.

So if you have any advice on how to overcome this obstacle and have enthusiasm for getting to know a girl romantically even when *I* don't have too much interest at first (because I'm sure that I'm overlooking great girls with whom I could live nice stories even though we don't have this "interest at first sight"-thing), or on how to create more opportunities to meet a girl with whom I would have this special feeling (apart from forcing myself to meet a lot of new people in many different contexts, which I already do, but more because I like to discover different ways of being than with the hope of meeting such a girl), you would help me immensely and I'm sure other people too.

Thanks for any advice on this!

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Michel-

Yes, I can relate to this. I used to have the same thing - love at first sight, where you just KNOW it's THAT girl, and the relationship of course is amazing and the two of you are a perfect match (every girlfriend I've had has been this, and they've all been wonderful), coupled with a distate at the idea of doing anything with other women and a belief that they really aren't suitable for you / not a good match / not women you especially want to be with.

I view the "love at first sight" thing as a real advantage - I don't know that everyone experiences it, but it really helps separate the wheat from the chaff. The "distaste" thing for most women though I view as mostly a weakness - I know why it's there, to protect you from ending up in a relationship with women who AREN'T your ideal relationship candidates, but it can be quite limiting if you want to advance your skill set with women. I don't have enough data points on what causes it to draw any firm conclusions - I speculate it's either an offshoot of narcissism ("She's not good enough for me"), obsessive-compulsive ("She's not quite perfect, and therefore impure / unclean! Don't put your willy on that!"), or simply a deep internal long-term relationship focus ("I want a girl for forever, therefore she MUST be the amazing, and anything short of that simply will not do"). I've only had a few other men tell me they had this, and one former girlfriend, and while I don't think it's totally uncommon, it's not all THAT common, and I haven't seen enough of it that I could tell you what for sure looks like causes it.

In any event, any form of disgust is a protective instinct by the brain - you see a food you don't like, and you feel disgusted because for whatever reason (taste, past history getting sick with that food, fear of new foods, etc.) your brain thinks that food is bad for you, so is emotionally dissuading you from eating it. You see a fat girl, and your brain fears the reputation hit you'd suffer from being seen talking to a fattie, or maybe has an irrational fear of touching her skin leading to you becoming infected by some kind of mythical fat-causing bacteria... and you feel disgust that compels you to stay out of talking / touching distance. Much of the time these fears are irrational and silly (sometimes, as with disgust toward, say, rotting corpses, these fears make reasonably good sense, though).

I still get love at first sight (which even if you're very active doesn't happen THAT often; it's maybe one girl every 2 months for me on average, even at my most active, and even in places with lots and lots of pretty and amazing women), but I forced myself to overcome the mild disgust I felt about sleeping with women I didn't have this with, and told myself it was a necessity to improve my skill base. Once I reached the point where I was skilled enough with women that I wasn't afraid of ever slipping into a relationship I didn't want to be in, this mostly went away; these days I completely enjoy sleeping with new women and it's just an "in the moment" kind of thing. We're just going to bed; we're not going to see each other more than once, unless I felt that love at first sight spark with her, AND she checks off my logical requirements boxes (I've had a few "love at first sight" girls I've discovered were still quite young and didn't have their master's degrees - one of my requirements for a relationship - and others I've gotten their clothes off, only to discover that what looked like acceptable breasts were really just Wonder Bras).

You don't have to push yourself here if you really don't want to; I'm something of an outlier / perfectionist in that once I started learning girl stuff, I REALLY wanted to learn girl stuff, and I decided screw my whiney "But I don't want to sleep with this girl! She may be pretty, but she's not that smart!" voice in my head and just bite the bullet and sleep with her anyway. I soon found out that it wasn't really that bad... in fact, it was pretty enjoyable!

Once your brain realizes you're not going to date a girl unless you WANT to, it'll stop protesting about sleeping with women it doesn't size up as perfect relationship candidates right away, and you can enjoy nights of pleasure with them without fearing lifelong commitment after, because you're in control of whom you date, you have options, and you keep your dating to those love-at-first-sight gals. This does take a little time though... I don't think you ever get really free from the distaste until you achieve absolute abundance and feel reasonably confident that you can get high caliber "just my type" girls easily and more or less at will - once you reach that point, the distaste just vanishes, because it's so easy to get your dream girls that the risk of you dating anything less is zero.

Chase

Richard's picture

Way to go Chase!

Martial arts have so many benefits man! Krav Maga is great stuff, I dabbled in it for a while. But, in the long run I've stuck to taking Karate formally, but do a lot with Jiu Jitsu, Judo, Wing Chun ( a little), some Tai Chi, and Hapkido, and along with Karate Ive got mastery in 5 weapons.

I implore you to keep at it Chase, its very rewarding stuff in an infinitely many number of ways, and let's you build even more confidence than you currently have!

-Richard

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Richard-

Yeah, martial arts are cool stuff. I think you said you were a third degree black belt in something on another thread - guessing that was karate? I took 3 years of Kenpo back in junior high and high school - forget what belt I was though, green with a brown stripe if I recall right, so around the upper middle belts.

Never used it in a fight though - those 3 years of 3 classes a week disappear the instant fists really come out, and every fight I've had was just undisciplined punching and brawling and head butts. What I'm looking for in Krav (and hopefully I'm getting) is something a bit more practical that comes out more instinctually in hand-to-hand combat situations, so I know what I'm doing instead of swinging about like a yeti or getting clobbered by oafs who've spent substantially more of their lives beating on other people than I have.

Chase

Richard's picture

Yes, 3rd degree black belt currently.

The thing with any combat system are the principles it instills, and there are things to look for in any class. Good classes have sparring! and teach you specific mindsets along with that sparring!

If a class doesn't have that, then its really not worth your time, and unless you get that combat experience during the class, like you said, that knowledge is gone as soon as the pressure is on.

Krav classes for the most part teach that, and teach you to always think that your opponent has a weapon. Really great stuff, I hope you learn what you need :)

-Richard

Peacer's picture

Chase you are great.
This is an awesome article I have ever read.

I have a question though about "only have ONE (1) 100 hour task at a time".
Chase, let's image If someone who is newbie to weight lifting, applies this method for starting weight lifting. Okay ?
His trainer says, you have to workout 1 hour for a day and three times for a week.
Well, In this case, he has to wait for something like 33 weeks to start another task.. Right.. ?
Please correct me, If I have understand this whole scenario wrong.

Doesn't it feel too long for waiting to start new task.. ?
In this kind of case, how can we apply this method.. I wonder.. ?
(I mean it is fairly long time right.. 33 weeks.., at the end of that if he feels that this is enough, I don't want it anymore, Don't you feel that he has wasted his time without starting any new task for 33 weeks..? )

And one request dear chase, can you write an article about Time Management, I wonder how do you manager your time..
I have read the "Time efficiency" article, How does he find those kind of methods and tricks.. Oh man.. I always ask myself after reading your articles.. Great...!

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Peacer-

You can still do other things, but you should only have one thing that you're committing to 100 hours to do, purely so you avoid commitment burnout. Unless you're an absolute MACHINE (and I don't think I've ever met anyone who is), at some point you're going to fall off the wagon, and it's going to take every ounce of willpower you've got to get back on. If that one thing, it's hard, but manageable; if it's TWO things you've got to get back to regularly doing that you aren't that good at yet and don't REALLY want to do, you're twice as likely to just pack it up and go home.

Your weight-lifting doesn't necessarily have to be your 100 hour goal right now. Since you have a personal trainer you're working with, he might be enough motivation to get you coming in frequently, and you can use your 100 hours on something else. That'd be, you'd say, "Okay, I'm going to try to get in to lift as much as possible, to build a better body and not disappoint my trainer. But my 100 hour task is going to be X other thing." Then make X other thing your commitment, and still try and get in as much as possible for lifting (but don't make it your 100 hour goal).

On time management - sure, I can write one on this. I opt out of a lot of things that people view as "mandatory", which helps manage time a lot better - I check email only every other day or so, for instance, and only after my major tasks for the day are done in case there's anything distracting in there that will divert me off course; my phone is usually on silent, and I don't look at it much, because I'm not so interested in giving other people the power to randomly interrupt me whenever they like; the first 2 hours of the day are frequently your most productive, so make 'em count, and do your top priority work that really requires hard thinking and a major push on then - things like that (those are the ones that stand out when I think about this; I'm sure there are others). But I'll do a post on it.

Chase

The M's picture

Cool article, Chase.

I tend to laugh or smile while I'm talking, have a somewhat choppy speaking style, and am often excessively breathy. Do you have any advice for changing these vocal habits? I've tried several times but they seem to come right back every time I'm talking with family, or in an uncomfortable situation.

I only have two fundamentals left to consistently work on - weight lifting and voice - each of which takes at least a 100 hour commitment. Surely it's not procrastinating to take care of those first before starting to approach girls consistently?

Best,
The M

Author
Chase Amante's picture

M-

Voice habits are most likely to come back under pressure and with people who knew you in the past, yes. All you can do here is actively work on them again in these situations - same as working on them in normal scenarios, once you've gotten used enough to speaking your new way around family / old friends, and in pressure situations, they become your defaults here, too. The only thing you can do to change them is to be aware of them and consciously clamp down on them whenever they crop up until they're gone for good. Sometimes this takes time.

On procrastinating - well, I don't know - does it FEEL like procrastinating? If you ask me, I'd put girls ahead of lifting, and probably ahead of voice too, unless your voice is terrible, but if there are specific reasons in your life why girls will definitely be way better to wait to do until after 100 hours of voice and 100 hours of lifting, maybe it's not procrastinating.

Voice I don't think you necessarily need to target 100 hours for, unless you're doing something specific like going to a voice coach or recording yourself and playing it back. If you're just relying on focusing on your voice as you talk, you'll burn through a few hours of this every day, most likely - chances are you're at 100 hours on voice in a month or so just based off of talking and paying attention to what you're doing and correcting it as you talk. No need for a specific goal here - this one takes care of itself almost naturally with just a bit of focus during conversations over time.

Chase

Jason's picture

Hi Chase,

I have a quick question regarding the article you wrote a while back about making friends.

I will be going back to graduate school soon and recently got a bit worried about making friends in this new environment.

My background is usually viewed with a somewhat "high" implied value as I went to a "top" school and had investment banking experience.

Usually this works well with females looking to be friends but with guys would this come off as too showy?

I usually try to imply value through the fact I like to:

- weightlift

- like fashion

- like to go out and drink (once I get drunk I usually am a lot of fun)

I am really curious how you would normally gain friends in an all new environment like graduate school where there are lots of open opportunities. Thank you so much Chase!

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Jason-

There's a magic phrase I use for dismissing high prestige things that are too much for some people: "Yeah, but whatever."

That's like this:

Guy: ... so then I worked for Accenture.

Me: Oh, cool. You've had a pretty decent career.

Guy: What about you? What do you do?

Me: Not too much. I do some work on the Internet. A little writing. I used to be a senior consultant for [big name high prestige multinational]; that's my claim to fame in the business consulting world.

Guy: Oh, wow. [company name]... that's a great company.

Me: Yeah, but whatever. It's still sitting in cubicles mashing on keyboards. The only thing impressive about it is the name on your résumé.

If it was grad school (not having gone, so I'm speculating), I'd probably hard-target finding right away a really cool guy who struck me as the sort of guy who probably does all right with women and who seems like he's someone who will be very interested in being the center of a social circle. I'd then tell this guy we ought to grab drinks, and try to make this happen ASAP - that night, if possible, or the next if not. I'd then tell him he seems like a cool dude, and we should see if we can get something of a circle going and get some cute girls and what not.

I'd then spend the next couple of weeks meeting the coolest guys and the prettiest girls I could find and telling them New Friend and I were having drinks and they ought to come along... which they will, because I seem like a cool guy, and they don't know anybody here yet, and people come to grad school to 1.) get a degree, and 2.) network. Bring them out, roll them into the circle. Spend a few weeks getting that built up, and you've got your base of awesome people to roll with, brainstorm with, and mastermind things up with.

Because grad schools are typically small, incestuous environments not unlike a more relaxed version of high school (or so I hear), you'll probably very quickly be one of the two guys (you and your buddy you started the circle with) at the center of the "cool kids club", which means you get your pick of the litter with any girl in the rest of the school, and an easy way of making friends with any guys you want - just invite them to come out and join the cool kids club for an evening, or even for a drink to chat one-on-one with you.

Anyway, I haven't done grad school... but that's probably how I'd go about it if I was going. Will be a fair amount of work socially those first few weeks, but the first few weeks are the most important for setting things up for the next two years, and after that you're just reaping the benefits of those first few weeks of setup work.

Chase

Knight's picture

To anyone who is still unsure with where to turn just get in there! Seriously, you're sitting on a gold mine where Chase has put in the hard work over the years for you - that being said you still need to put some in yourself but you will be reaping the rewards so quick. I still have a lot to learn but I'm using this stuff everyday to bring in new people to my life and clear out the old ones that sought never to improve themselves or others. Stop focusing on small details like I did when I was unsure and just go with your mind - stick to the fundamentals that you learn and become aware of on this blog and then it won't matter if you make a mistake, you will be a benefit to those around you and they probably won't even recognize it - don't sabotage yourself by limiting yourself to reading all this and not employing it because you're unsure of what Chase would do in the situation. So go ahead and benefit others and yourself. Focus on the smaller details when you have your fundamentals down and you want to become more efficient!

Falcon's picture

Hey Chase,

Great to hear you're training in krav maga! Personally I train in brazilian jiu-jitsu, muay thai, boxing, wrestling and mma but I do have a few friends that do krav.

I have been implementing all of the tips you are giving here and it has been helping a lot! This past summer I have been approaching tons of girls and getting great success. However now that school has started I am running into a little problem that is kind of pestering. Most of the time whenever I am making approaches at school it is in that 5 minute period between classes. A lot of times I just see them walking the same direction so I pre-open with the little touch to the elbow or something of the sort and then start talking and deep diving. However depending on their class we might be talking for 1-3 minutes or less and I usually don't get to close in time, then I am forced to finish the next day ( if I see them again ).

I know that trick you discussed in another article ( I forget which :P ) where you give them your number and tell them something along the lines of "this could be the best thug that ever happened to you" however at school a risky approach like that that goes bad gets around real fast, and hurts my social value...

So do you know any good ways to close fast without taking huge risks of hurting social value?

Thanks,
~Falcon

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Falcon-

You're thinking of the Two Minute Number Close, and it actually goes quite different from how you remember - see this article, and do a Ctrl+F / Cmd+F for "Two Minute Number Close": "How to Get a Phone Number from a Girl Every Time You Ask."

Assuming you're relatively smooth when you ask, and that you legitimately ARE in a hurry, you'll be able to pull this one off quite directly and genuinely, and even if you get a "no", you can simply respond with something along the lines of, "Too bad. Maybe I'll see you around then!" Done right, and if you leave with your head held high, even if she rejects you then and there, if you run into her in parties / class / the cafeteria / elsewhere, she's going to remember you and think well of you, and perhaps even finding you charming and intriguing. I've heard from a few guys in college of women they've approached quickly and boldly who rejected them then and there (usually on autopilot), and they handled it well, and ended up running into the girl socially, where suddenly she had huge amounts of attraction for the guy and they ended up together.

I have some similar non-college stories myself, of girls I've approached, got a "no", exited gracefully, then ran into later and attraction was off the charts and things went smoothly after that. It seems to be something where the girl rejects you, you handle it very well, and she's left thinking, "Wow. Maybe I SHOULDN'T have rejected him...! Damn," only for her to meet you later unexpectedly, and view that as a second chance with a rare, charming man.

Chase

Jake's picture

Brilliant. I think that this article is tops at the most important ones you ever posted, after all, if people don't use any of this stuff, then there's no point. I'm sure that you realized this (seems pretty much the reason you made this article in the first place).

This goes much further than just going out to approach women, actually. It helps you handle your quest for constantly working on your fundamentals, which is the very core of being able to attract women successfully: constantly worrying about your looks and body language, going to the gym, taking martial arts classes, all these stuff that gives you that edge.

You've been closing all gaps on the mindset category, which by far is one of the most fascinating aspects of this site. As you discussed in the Mastery article, having a model and taking action is the most crucial of all steps of achieving mastery of anything. Wayne Gretzky puts it better when he says that "You miss 100 percent of the shots you never take."

One things that I thought I might point out so it become clear to you is that one thing that keeps appearing on the mindset posts is learning. Lots of book claim to teach you something much faster than the traditional way, and I truly believe that you can learn things faster than the average - you even shared an brief anecdote on your college experiences regarding to learning way faster than your friends.

I think it would be and astonishingly interesting post, as people would have a better algorithm to deconstruct and apply things that they read on here to real life situations. Sometimes I have to read the same paper or article over and over again to remember myself to pay attention to this or that specific behavior. I think that violates "Time efficiency done right". Am I just too hurried and sick of "wasting time" on something that really takes time (such as your data points being spaced enough so you can see the pattern in them) or do you have better ways of learning and remembering things to share with us? :)

Author
Chase Amante's picture

Jake-

Yeah, an article on general learning tech could be interesting to write. There are all kinds of little nuances to it, but offhand I'd say some of the big ones for me are to constantly be fitting every new piece of information into a larger overall picture, and when the information doesn't fit, stop and figure out why - is the picture in your head wrong (most likely, if the information is from a credible source and you're not an expert); is the information itself wrong (possibly, if the source is not credible and pains are not taken to rigorously verify that information); is the picture right, and the information is right, but you're just trying to fit it into the wrong place in the picture?

Another part is doing as soon as you can - I think I talked about that in the "Mastery Anything" article... I get very impatient if I've just gotten good, usable new information but I'm being prevented from using it (say, because the instructor is going on too long of an exposition without giving enough time to try things out). In six-week training class I had while back as a business consultant, I'd invariably open up the software we were being trained to use and start blowing through the assignments in class as soon as I felt like I had enough of a handle on them from what the instructor was saying, and often by the time he or she would tell us to get started on the assignment, I'd already be halfway or completely finished, and could then help other students who were scratching their heads and staring blankly at the screens to figure out what to do. Not necessarily because I was any smarter than they are; there were some really clever folks in that class with me. It was more that I get a lot of enjoyment out of being the first one done and being able to explain things and having everyone else say, "How did he learn that so fast? How does he already know what to do?" All I really did was start doing the exercise while the instructor was still talking, while still paying enough attention to what was being said to make sure I didn't miss anything important. That's the only hard part that takes a little getting used to, is the balancing between listening and doing.

The emotional aspect is a big one here; you have to be excited about learning, and pride yourself on piecing everything together like a big puzzle. This mindset is rare enough that whenever you take it on, you're usually the only person with it, which means you get a lot of special privileges and recognition from all the people who see you as "smart" or "gifted" or "talented" (when all you're doing is working harder and paying more attention than anybody else). But the emotional boost you get from being a winner at learning can be very similar to the one you get from being the best at billiards or basketball or anything else; I might say, treat it like a competitive sport, and see if you can come up with the most piercing insights, the most complete perspective, the fastest puzzling together of all the pieces on any given task, and you will find yourself learning ever faster and faster and more and more thoroughly.

But - I'll do a more fleshed out post on it at some point and try to collect all these messy thoughts into something a bit more orderly.

Chase

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