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You’ve just met a girl, and you like her, and you’re getting to know her, and then, all of a sudden, out of nowhere, a man you’ve never met before in your life steps up to you and starts talking to you.
“Hey, how do you guys know each other?” he asks.
Or, “Dude, where’d you get that shirt – it looks like something I saw at a yard sale last weekend,” he remarks.
Or, “Hey, buddy – that’s my friend. She doesn’t want to talk to you.”
Disrupting, interrupting, tooling, AMOG tactics, whatever you want to call it, this can be a real thorn in your side until you figure it out. It’s quite annoying and can be out-and-out frustrating when you lose a girl because some oaf lacking in social finesse decides to offer his opinion on your conversation and manages to throw you off balance, or he distracts you from the girl long enough that she starts feeling excluded and leaves, or gets dragged off by a friend keeping an eye on the interaction.
Comments
Disruptive men
I was reading your post about dirsuptive men and how to shut them down, but my situation last night was a little different.
I was talking to this girl and one of her guy friends deliberately cut in between and straight up interrupted her, but she didn't ignore him and talked to him instead, I waited for about a minute and then I left because I felt awkward.... What would you have done differently?
Well they know each other,
Well they know each other, the girl isn't very interested in you and you're a bit on the weak side.
You have to determine what is worthy for you and what isn't.
Among my friends and girlfriends I have told them to never interrupt me and they complied. I give exceptions to a rush of ideas on both sides of course. The strangers who are newbies and gave me a bad impression on the first time? They know that they will never get to talk to me again.
And at least if that actually happened to me I would just look at his pure anus face with distaste and condescension and walk off. As an alpha male I don't bother myself with garbage.
Friend is always the disruptive one
This was a helpful article, however my issue is with a close male friend of mine. He has no luck with women rarely and whenever he see's me either trying to close out on one or get into a relationship he always becomes a snob and tries to put me or her down in an attempt to disrupt my progress on another woman.
I'd like to have an answer to
I'd like to have an answer to that as well.
I have some good friends and whenever they see me chatting up a chick they try to get involved and literally chat up the girl.
I feel sorry for them, and I usually let them try because I know they are going to fail anyway... but more often then not they manage to mess things up for me as well. It bothers me but I just move on to another chick or think, I'll chat up a chick another time when he's not around. no big deal.
I don't want to fight, compete against my male friends for a chick a just met, it's ridiculous. but some of my friends just don't get it.. they doesn't seem to realise what they are doing. They are good guys and good friends and I go out with them from time to time.
so... how to deal with friends like that ?
thanks
RE: I'd like to have an answer to
I'm not an expert but make sure you've seen this article by Chase, which gives some options for not ignoring your friends but letting them know to move elsewhere:
http://www.girlschase.com/content/breaking-circle
Other than that, just tell your friends and let them know that for your tactics in meeting girls, this is disruptive. If they are interested in why, then teach them a little. (Again, I'm no expert, just a suggestion.)
You make a Bro Code like I
You make a Bro Code like I did with my friends, and include "Don't interrupt when one of the bros is trying to hook up with a girl except in cases of emergency."
What if the disruptive guy or cockblock is part of your group?
This guy was once a wingman, but broke code, and went rogue so to speak. He has made it clear that any girl I bring with out with me is fair game for him until we are actually in some sort of committed relationship. Even then, I’m not sure I would trust him based on our conversations. Since I run into this guy regularly, and have many mutual friends, how can I successfully shut down his game with the least amount of effort, and do it without looking like a douche?
making fun of you
What do you do when a guy is making fun of you in public?
Ask yourself.. what would
Ask yourself.. what would James Bond do?
Men who break other men down automatically look weak in the eyes
of a strong female. Just keep your cool and take hate out of the picture.
say something, smooth, or laugh it off. it doesn't matter how you spin it.
Misery loves company.
It's one thing to act charming, and another to KNOW you're charming.
Stay Suave my friend
- Gabriel Melaku
Aggressive guys
Hi Chase. How are you? Alessandro, 34-year-old doctor from Italy here (I don't know if you remember me).
First thing to say: thank you for your last replies to my comments (I read them very carefully).
I live in a very competitive setting, as seduction is concerned: in my city, nobody knows about the PUA community and its tactics, but, however, many men know how to behave with women, and, if you are not fast enough, you risk to miss opportunities, especially in nightclubs.
I've never been a "nightclub guy", but, some months ago, I met new friends and entered a new social context. This context is full of beautiful women and guys who can be, at the same time, Casanova + science/law/etc. geniuses: for example, one of my friends, is good with women and also an expert in the field of chemistry, astronomy (has written a book); another one is a tall lawyer whit a good dance floor game and kino.
Usually, women like me, because I have many interests, a discrete social intelligence and a nice physical aspect (many persons say I am similar to Keanu Reeves). However, even though I can be intriguing with eye contact, kino and words, I would define my style as a gentleman style: I don't tease aggressively, I don't use many bad words and I don't disturb my friends when they are interacting with women.
Last Saturday, I had my first little club success (I am happy, because I am on the opposite side: I usually prefer nice conversations in calmer environments): a girl, who was with a female cousin of hers, used a little question I asked as a tool to engage me in a conversation, and was very proactive. Even though she was with her cousin, I found a way to dance with her and to kiss her.
Before kissing her, she was already into me, but, when I introduced my tall lawyer friend to her, he started teasing her and making her laugh: without "respecting" our friendship, he was, literally, trying to steal "my" girl. So, as you can see, there's another risk: a man can engage your girl without caring about you (she risks to reply politely and to gradually trust him till the point of permitting him to get closer).
This friend of mine, at a certain point, made me feel in discomfort: he and she started to dance very close (he has a very good dance floor game) and I was left alone.
Luckily, the girl decided to leave the guy and to dance with me again. This time, I was more aggressive: even though I am a complete failure on the dance floor, I intensified kino and kissed her.
Probably I kissed her a little too soon: in fact, she welcomed my kiss, but was very passive.
When I finally had the possibility to have a conversation with her about music (she likes singing and I am a guitarist), my lawyer friend re-appeared and started to gain her attention with intense teasing (something which is not part of my style).
At the end of the night, I felt the competition had had a result of 1-1, but the inner insecurity continued to repeat me she preferred him. She gave her Facebook to the both of us.
Two days later, she wrote me a short message about a song. In order to reward her behaviour, I replied warmly. 24 hours have passed, and she hasn't re-replied yet. Even though she is not a super special girl to me, I am anxious to wait for her reply, because I am worried that my new lawyer friend can win the competition by acting faster.
What should I do? And, in general, while, in normal situations, girls can have a preference for a guy who has a silent charisma, and ignore everyone else, I have the feeling that, in this context, their preferences are not so strong (she prefers who catches her first), and this thing frustrates me. What can I do when someone uses this kind of teasing completely capturing a woman's attention?
Thanks!
P.S.: My other friends didn't like this lawyer's behaviour towards me (I think that there should be respect for your friends' spot).
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